August 26 2021

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Thursday, August 26, 2021 – Edition: #7054

Another Sheetload of Bull!


★ Spencer Elden, the man whose unusual baby portrait was used for one of the most recognizable album covers of all time, Nirvana’s “Nevermind,” has filed a lawsuit alleging that the nude image constituted child pornography. The picture has generally been understood as a statement on capitalism, as it includes the digital imposition of a dollar bill on a fishhook that the baby appears to be enthusiastically swimming toward. Non-sexualized nude photos of infants are generally not considered child pornography under law. Elden is asking at least $150,000 from each of the defendants, including surviving band members Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic, plus Courtney Love, the executor of Kurt Cobain’s estate, and the managers of his estate, plus a number of record companies that released or distributed the album in the last three decades.
★ Imagine Tom Cruise aboard a helicopter and landing right in your back yard – literally. A family in the U.K. got a surprise treat when Cruise landed in their field, then let them go for a ride. He’s in Europe filming the latest “Mission: Impossible” movie and was supposed to be shooting in Birmingham, U.K. The nearby airport was closed and Cruise, who was traveling by helicopter, needed a place to land. Alison Webb was asked if her field could be used to land a helicopter for an unnamed “VIP who was running late.” When the helicopter arrived, none other than Tom Cruise emerged. Webb said that he immediately walked over to her children and “elbow bumped” them…”Then he said if the kids would like, they could go up in the helicopter.”
★ Arnold Schwarzenegger’s rant against anti-maskers has cost him at least one corporate sponsor at his upcoming bodybuilding competition in Columbus, Ohio. REDCON1, a sports supplement company, announced last week they are pulling out from sponsoring next month’s Arnold Classic bodybuilding competition over Schwarzenegger’s (quote-unquote) “dangerous” and “anti-American” comments. On Aug. 11, Schwarzenegger called out Americans who are still “in denial” about the COVID-19 pandemic.
★ Jessica Chastain’s skin has been left with what she calls “permanent damage” following her transformation into Tammy Faye Bakker. She stars as the late televangelist, who was known for caking her face in make-up, in “The Eyes of Tammy Faye”. Chastain has revealed that wearing the heavy film make-up left her skin “stretched out”. She says it took 7½ hours to have the make-up applied, and it got “so heavy and hot”, she became worried about her circulation. The upcoming film is based on the 2000 documentary of the same name, and the cast also includes Andrew Garfield as Jim Bakker.


• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Thandiwe Newton, Izzy G., Belly, guest host RuPaul
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Camila Cabello, Ryan Tedder, OneRepublic
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Clarissa Ward, Amanda Peet, Roger Bennett (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Michael Shannon, Hannah Einbinder, Jerome Flood II
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Terry Crews, Lorde
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Robin Roberts (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Bridget Moynahan, Bitsie Tulloch, guest co-host Arsenio Hall (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Salma Hayek, James Corden, Dayna Isom Johnson
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Gwen Stefani, Javicia Leslie, Rita Ora (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Sherri Shepherd, Rob Riggle, Charles Melton (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Chris O’Donnell, Geoffrey Zakarian, Dr. Aliza Pressman (R)
• “Big Brother” (CBS): Following a live vote, a houseguest is evicted and interviewed by host Julie Chen Moonves.
• “Making It’ (NBC): Season 3 finale
• “Kids Behind Bars: Life or Parole” (A&E): Season 2 premiere

• Drake — laughed off Kanye West’s latest jab, as their longtime feud heats up. Fans thought Kanye “crossed the line” by sharing Drake’s Toronto address on Instagram. It didn’t seem to bother Drizzy, though. He shared a video of himself riding in a car with the top down at night, chuckling to himself.
• Ed Sheeran — shared a clip of him re-recording his part on Taylor Swift’s new version of ‘Everything Has Changed’ for “Red (Taylor’s Version)”. He plugged pre-orders of the vinyl copy of the new version of the 2012 album, and teased the release of their new duet ‘Run’.
• Rolling Stones – After the news of the passing of Charlie Watts, the usual assortment of online condolences was posted by musical peers and those he inspired, including from Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, Brian Wilson, John Fogerty, Elton John and Paul Stanley. But perhaps Joan Jett said it best: “Charlie Watts was the most elegant and dignified drummer in rock and roll. He played exactly what was needed – no more – no less. He is one of a kind.”
• Paul McCartney – His forthcoming book “The Lyrics,” will include lyrics to the unrecorded song ‘Tell Me Who He Is’. The book, out Nov. 2, is described as a “self-portrait in 154 songs.” Each song will also be accompanied by commentary from McCartney.
• R.E.M. — have announced a 25th-anniversary reissue of their album “New Adventures in Hi-Fi”, out Oct. 29. The 2-CD/1 Blu-ray collection includes a newly remastered version of the album, a disc of B-sides and live recordings, and a previously unreleased outdoor projection film that was shown on buildings in 1996 to promote the album’s original release.
• HARDY – is engaged! He wrote on Facebook: I’m not her boyfriend anymore”. A pic showed him getting down on one knee in front of new fiancé Caleigh Ryan with a ring in his hand. A picture on her Instagram shows the two kissing with her caption: “WE’RE GETTING MARRIED!!! Ryan is the marketing coordinator for Graduate Hotels in Nashville.
• Florida Georgia Line — have canceled their entire fall tour. The 2021 I Love My Country Tour was set to begin in Atlanta on Sept. 24 and feature opening acts Russell Dickerson, Lauren Alaina and more, but COVID-19 has changed that.
• Justin Moore – ‘We Didn’t Have Much’ is his 10th country radio #1 single. He marked the occasion on Twitter, writing: “Humbling that country radio has continued to support my music after all these years. It’s something I don’t take for granted. I’m very grateful for those folks, the fans, and my team around me.”


It’s called “buyer’s remorse”, and we’re getting it – bad. According to a new report, the average person will spend over $70,000 in their lifetime on online purchases that they end up regretting.  The survey of 2,000 Americans by OnePoll found that people typically spend an average of $899 online each year on ‘disappointing’ items. That underwhelming shopping list includes clothing (60%), tech (27%), and toys or children’s products (25%). And what’s the problem with the stuff we buy – but wish we hadn’t? Specific complaints include the quality of the product (64%), the size (46%), and its color (31%). The study also examined the impact of product reviews on our buying decisions. 51% of those polled said they are more likely to trust bad reviews than good reviews when shopping online.
(My biggest complaint about my online purchases is that they keep ending up inside my neighbor’s house!)
(Sure $70K sounds like a lot. But at least we can take comfort in the fact that some of that money went to send a rich guy who has no regard for his employees into space…)
(If that’s how much we spend on things we DIDN’T like, exactly how much do we spend on things we DO like? Actually, forget I said that. My wife and I need to have a chat…)

An Oregon hospital, has installed a dinner plate throwing booth to provide overworked caregivers with “alternative stress relief”. Oregon was once the poster child for limiting the spread of the coronavirus, but now it is being hammered by the delta variant. Oregon keeps breaking records for the number of hospitalized COVID-19 patients, and guard troops have been dispatched to hospitals, which are stretched to the breaking point. And that’s something that is definitely not going unnoticed by medical staff. The wellness department at Portland, Oregon’s Salem Hospital, which normally recommends yoga and deep breathing for relaxation, recently set up a booth and filled it with dinner plates for a different kind of stress relief. According to a nurse there named Lisa: “We put on safety glasses. And we took plates and we shattered them. And I kept going back. I kept going back, and they told me I had enough turns.”
(You have to admit – they have a lot on their plates…)
(So, the state is breaking records, and the nurses are breaking dinner plates?)

➢ The Indian city of New Delhi opened the country’s first “smog tower” on Monday, in a bid to purify air in the world’s most polluted capital city. Using 40 giant fans and 5,000 filters, the 82-foot (25m) tower sucks in polluted air from the top, filters it, then pumps it out from the bottom. It covers a radius of 0.4 square miles, and filters around 35,000 cubic feet of air a second. The $2 million tower is a pilot program, and authorities will study it for 2 years to determine its effectiveness. (PLEASE tell me that thing doesn’t run on coal!)
➢ A new material that makes seawater drinkable within minutes could solve the world’s freshwater shortages. One common method of desalinating water works by using pressure to force water through membranes. But membranes regularly become too wet and ineffective, meaning they have to be replaced frequently. Researchers from the Korean Institute of Civil Engineering and Building Technology have created what they call a coaxial electrospun nanofiber membrane. While current membranes last for around 50 hours, the team’s new material can go for as long as a month before needing to be replaced. (Good thing. With a name like that, it’ll take that long to order a new one!)
-Insider, StudyFinds

⇒ I feel drunk with power when I go to delete an app and all the other apps quiver in fear – m. dickson
⇒ on one hand i want to live in the middle of nowhere but on the other hand i need to buy a $7 iced oat milk latte every morning – Dana Donnelly
⇒ Parents be like “i don’t have a favorite child” then use one of your siblings birth dates as a password — YKTFV
⇒ bars should start doing “sad hour.” drinks are half-price if you come alone and your eyes are red – trash jones
⇒ Wait when they bury someone with implants is there a point in the decomposition process where there’s just a skeleton with huge boobs – merritt k
⇒ Nobody’s thinking about that weird thing you said. They’re thinking about a different weird thing you said that you didn’t even notice.  — deadeyebrakeman
⇒ Welcome to parenting. People who actually eat dirt will now criticize your cooking. – The Nefarious A-Aron
⇒ οnce i started spending my οwn money i realized my mom was right… we do got food at home – Ren
-HuffPost, BuzzFeed

The global shipping crisis, which has seen snarled supply chains and shutdowns in the pandemic, is getting worse. The Delta variant is sparking more critical port closures, such as the shutdown of a facility in China that’s the world’s 3rd-busiest container port. Complications like this have a ripple effect on jammed warehouses and stretched road and rail capacity. They also increase shipping prices. Some producers are taking drastic steps to meet demand, such as changing where products are made and moving them by plane instead of boat. Ultimately, the situation means shoppers will face higher prices and possible shipping disruptions going into the holiday season. (PLEASE tell me this includes fruitcake!)


1957 [64] Rick Hansen, Port Alberni BC, Paralympic games athlete (3 gold medals) /philanthropist/wheelchair marathoner (his “Man in Motion” world tour logged more than 40,000 km through 34 countries on 4 continents before crossing Canada)

1966 [55] Dan Vickrey, Walnut Creek CA, rock guitarist (Counting Crows-‘Mr. Jones’, ‘Accidentally in Love”)

1969 [52] Adrian Young, Long Beach CA, rock drummer (No Doubt-‘Don’t Speak’, ‘It’s My Life’)

1970 [51] Melissa McCarthy, Plainfield IL, movie actress (“Identity Thief”, “Bridesmaids”)/TV actress (“Mike & Molly” 2010-16) COMING UP…”The Starling”, 2021

1975 [46] Tyler Connolly, Delta BC, rock singer-guitarist (Theory Of A Deadman-‘No Surprise’, ‘Not Meant to Be’)

1980 [41] Macaulay Culkin, New York City NY, movie actor (“Home Alone”, “Uncle Buck”, “My Girl”)

1980 [41] Chris Pine, LA CA, movie actor (“Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse”, “Wonder Woman”, “Star Trek” films) COMING UP…”Violence of Action”, 2021

1982 [39] John Mulaney, Chicago IL, comedian (former writer for “Saturday Night Live”)/voice actor (‘Peter Porker/Spider-Ham’ in “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse”

1985 [36] Brian Kelley, Ormond Beach FL, country singer (Florida Georgia Line-‘Simple’, ‘Cruise’)

• “Dog Appreciation Day”, to encourage support, rescue, and help for dogs in need. (And, just because:

• “Make Your Own Luck Day”, a day to take affirmative action to gain control of your life. (Taking responsibility for your own actions . . . what a concept!)

• “Women’s Equality Day”, celebrating the civil rights movement by women that had its formal beginnings in 1848 at the world’s first women’s rights convention, in Seneca Falls NY.

• “National Cherry Popsicle Day”, the kind moms love ’cause the stains DON’T come out!

• “Toilet Paper Day”, What’s the difference between good and bad toilet paper? One is terrible the other is tearable. (Don’t stop me, I’m on a roll!)

• “WebMistress Day”, A WebMistress is a woman who designs, develops, markets and maintains websites. The term has existed since the mid-1990s. Comparatively, the term WebMaster arrived on the scene as early as 1986. (A ‘WebMistress’ isn’t what you thought it’d be, is it?)

[Fri] Kiss Me Day
[Fri] Banana Lovers Day
[Sat] Bow Tie Day
[Sat] Red Wine Day

1996 [25] Electronics giant Philips unveils the first ‘Flat TV’, which can be hung on a wall (These people obviously never met my Uncle Jerry!)

2018 [03] Playwright and author Neil Simon (“The Odd Couple”), dies at 91

2014 [07] Kate Bush makes her stage comeback at London’s Hammersmith Apollo to an ecstatic response from fans at her first concert in 35 years (22 shows are sold out in less than 15 minutes)

2019 [02] Ed Sheeran wraps up his ÷ (Divide) tour with a show in Ipswich, England. It is the highest-ever grossing tour, earning him $775.6 million over 255 shows since March 2017

2014 [07] It’s announced that Burger King will purchase Canada’s Tim Hortons restaurant chain for US$11.4 billion, creating the 3rd-largest global fast-food company (now 4th)

2013 [08] All 25,000 applicants to the University of Liberia fail their entrance examination


✓ Only 30% of people can flare their nostrils.
✓ The city of Montreal finished paying off construction costs of the 1976 Olympics in 2006.
✓ 100 calories will propel a bicycle 3 miles (5km).
✓ The term “junkie” comes from the fact that heroin users in the early 1900s would collect and sell scrap metal to pay for their fix.
✓ The Titanic crew had no binoculars, which may have helped them see the iceberg. They were inside a locker and the key was lost.
✓ A single dairy cow can pass more than 300 pounds (136kg) of gas per year.
-WhattheFFacts, BathroomReadersInstitute

Best of BS . . .
• When someone asks if you’d like to see pictures of their vacation.
• When a stranger asks if you need a ride home.
• When a cop asks if you’ve been drinking.
• When someone asks if they can see your browser history.
• When she says “Do you love me, honey?”
• When someone uses the words ‘help’, ‘me’ and ‘move’ in the same sentence.
• When anybody, anywhere, asks you to hold their beer.
• When someone asks you a question and you have no idea what they said.
• When someone asks you to look at their rash.
• When someone tells you not to call them Shirley.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2018

• “It’s about time I got out of that cookie.”
• “You will be hungry again in 1 hour.”
• “You are not illiterate.”
• “If you eat something and nobody sees you eat it, it has no calories.”
• “You are about to become $12.95 poorer ($10.95 if you had the buffet).”
• “Ignore previous cookie.”
• “The fortune you seek is in another cookie.”
• “You are about to finish reading a fortune cookie.”
• “You laugh now, wait till you get home.”
• “Pigeon poop burns the retina for 13 hours. You will learn this the hard way.”
-Adapted from, first published in BS in 2015

➠ Tom Cruise just finished shooting a new “Mission Impossible” sequel, set to be released in 2022. (It’s called “Mission Impossible 7: Getting People To See ‘Mission Impossible 7′”.)
➠ Christian Ronaldo is the highest paid celebrity on Instagram, at an estimated $1.6 million per post. …small price to pay to keep him out of movies, though!)
➠ According to researchers, couples that are either too similar or too different are not likely to last very long. (For example, if you collect Star Wars memorabilia, and she is a normal female…)
➠ Macaulay Culkin is 41 today. (His family planned a big party, but completely forgot to bring him along…)
➠ Fact of the Day:  Couples who spend at least 10 minutes a day laughing together are more likely to have a stronger relationship. (However, if that laughing happens when you step out of the shower. . . not-so-much!)

Get this cat on America’s Got Talent immediately (sound up):

A perfect metaphor for my life would be, “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock”.

What law or “social rule” completely baffles you?

Question:  46% of people say they would do THIS alongside a good friend. What is it?
Answer:  Get matching tattoos

The work you do when you procrastinate is probably the work you should be doing for the rest of your life.


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