Friday, September 30, 2022 – Edition: #7328

It’s Another Running Of The Bull!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Queen Elizabeth II might have been one of the most complex, dynamic and beloved figures of the 20th century, but her death certificate is oddly simple. The queen’s just-released death certificate says the 96-year-old monarch died of “old age”. That’s it. Typically, a death certificate contains a more technical description of one or more conditions leading to a person’s death. The document, published by National Records of Scotland on Thursday, states that Elizabeth died at Balmoral Castle in Ballater, Scotland on Sept. 8 at 3.10 p.m. The document was signed by the queen’s daughter, Princess Anne.
-TMZ, CTV
★ Amber Heard and Johnny Depp’s legal battle is headed to the small screen. Nearly 4 months after the jury came to a verdict in the “Pirates of the Caribbean” star’s defamation trial against the “Aquaman” actress, Tubi has released the trailer for the upcoming Sara Lohman-directed movie “Hot Take: The Depp/Heard Trial.” The one-minute clip features scenes recreating the infamous trial—including parts of both Depp and Heard’s testimonies, as well as the scrutiny she received on social media. The film stars Mark Hapka and Megan Davis as the former couple, with Melissa Marty playing Depp’s lawyer Camille Vasquez, and Mary Carrig as Heard’s attorney Elaine Bredehoft. Hot Take: The Depp/Heard Trial hits Tubi today. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yydwxa8j
-NYPost
★ “The Sopranos” has been named the best TV show of all time. Rolling Stone unveiled its list of the top 100 television shows, calling the New Jersey-set HBO mob drama an “undisputed champion” due to its “86 medium-transforming episodes.” The Sopranos ran between 1999 and 2007, starring James Gandolfini as ‘Tony Soprano’. The rest of the top-5, in order, are: “The Simpsons,” “Breaking Bad,” “The Wire” and “Fleabag.”
-NJ
★ Although he has starred in at least 85 films throughout his glittering career, won 2 Best Actor Oscars, 7 Primetime Emmys and a Presidential Medal of Freedom, Tom Hanks thinks only 4 of his movies are “pretty good.” He made the revelation to People while promoting his debut novel “The Making of Another Major Motion Picture Masterpiece,” set for release next May. Quote: “I’ve made a ton of movies, and 4 of them are pretty good, I think, and I’m still amazed at how films come together. From a flicker of an idea to the flickering image onscreen, the whole process is a miracle.” Hanks did not divulge which films he considers “pretty good”. (But we know it’s definitely not “Elvis”!)

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Jason Bateman, Paul Simon
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Zac Efron, Debbie Harry, Lea Michele
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): John Oliver, Quinta Brunson, Courtney Barnett, Craig Reynolds (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Kevin Hart, Alison Brie (R)
• The View” (ABC/CTV): Star Jones, Mario Cantone
• The Talk” (CBS): David Alan Grier
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Tyra Banks, Anderson Cooper
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Topher Grace, Kelsea Ballerini
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Guy Branum, Billy Eichner, Luke Macfarlane, Benny Drama, TS Madison, Jim Rash, Miss Lawrence
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Derek Hough
• “Sherri” (Check local listings): Alfonso Ribeiro
• “Shark Tank” (ABC): A kit for creating cuddly animal characters; a trussing device designed to cook the perfect bird; an update on Beatbox Beverages.
• “The Price Is Right at Night” (CBS): Actors Iain Armitage and Raegan Revord guest model as an audience of real twins competes for double the amazing prizes.
• “One Royal Holiday” (HALL): When Anna offers a stranded mother and son shelter from a blizzard, she learns that they are the royal family of Galwick and they are both in need of a little Christmas magic.

SATURDAY-
• “Halloween in Hollywood” (NBC): From “Halloween Horror Nights” in Hollywood, celebrating horror fandom and the genre’s legacy — especially the “Halloween” franchise — including a sneak peek at the film “Halloween Ends.”
• “The Gabby Petito Story” (LIFE): Premiere. Police begin a nationwide search when 22-year-old Gabby Petito disappears while traveling with her fiancé, Brian Laundrie.
• “Girlfriendship” (HALL): Premiere. After a booking mix-up, Samara’s birthday getaway turns into a weeklong journey where 3 friends rediscover passion, purpose and romance.

SUNDAY-
• “Celebrity Jeopardy!” (ABC): Quarterfinal #2: Eddie Huang, Reggie Watts and Iliza Shlesinger. Followed by “Celebrity Wheel of Fortune”.
• “The Equalizer” (CBS): Season 3 premiere. In the aftermath of her abduction, the walls between McCall’s family and vigilante life continue to crumble as those closest to her come together to save her.
• “The Walking Dead” (AMC): Daryl and Negan rush to the Commonwealth in order to stop Hornsby.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Post Malone — made his return to the stage in Cleveland Tuesday, after being hospitalized following a hard fall Sept. 17. He was clearly in pain, grabbing his ribs, and at one point he took his shirt off to show the crowd his bandages. Still the audience gave him tons of props.
• Lizzo — While performing in Washington Tuesday, she was allowed to play a few notes on the 200-year-old prized crystal flute of US Founding Father James Madison. The heirloom had never been played before. She shared video, writing: “As a flute player this is iconic and I will never be over it…no one has ever heard what it sounds like… now you do.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/29ztev92
• Avicii – 75% of the late DJ’s recording and publishing rights have been sold to Pophouse Entertainment, the music investment firm co-founded by ABBA’s Björn Ulvaeus. The deal is estimated to be worth 9 figures.
• Britney Spears and Elton John – have released a video for their collab ‘Hold Me Closer’. Directed by Tanu Muino, who also helmed Harry Styles’ ‘As It Was’ and Lil Nas X’s ‘Montero’, it does not feature Spears or John, but is full of interpretive dance numbers. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yc63w8bd
• David Bowie – His classic 1971 album “Hunky Dory” will be the focus of a deluxe reissue Nov. 25, featuring unreleased home demos, live recordings, alt versions, and more. The 4CD/1Blu-ray set features 48 unreleased tracks, including BBC recordings, and Bowie’s own home and hotel recordings for tracks that wound up on the album, which contained the classics ‘Changes’ and ‘Life on Mars?’.
• Luke Bryan – His 2022 Farm Tour of small towns has wrapped after 6 shows. After 13 years, the Farm Tours have awarded 78 college scholarships to students from farming families local to his tour stops. And since the beginning of a partnership with Feeding America in 2015, Bryan and Bayer have donated 6 million meals and over $180,000 for food banks and local farmers.
• Jon Pardi – His wife, Summer, says that when she told him they were pregnant, he “didn’t get it” at first. After the news broke last week, Summer posted that she had taped the positive pregnancy test to a sign that read “baby on board” and placed it on the back of their boat. Although Jon didn’t clue in at first, once it clicked, he was hit emotions and gave her a tight embrace. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yvwew322
• Martina McBride – has announced the dates for her 12th annual “The Joy of Christmas Tour”. Kicking off on Nov. 26 in Greensboro NC, and running through Dec. 18 in Fayetteville AR, she calls it “Truly a night for the whole family to celebrate all the joyful things about the holiday season.”

SHOOTING THE BULL

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Smile” (R, Horror-Mystery): After witnessing a bizarre, traumatic incident involving a patient, Dr. Rose Cotter starts experiencing frightening occurrences that she can’t explain. She must confront her troubling past in order to escape her horrifying new reality. (Sosie Bacon, Jessie T. Usher, Kyle Gallner)
• “Bros” (R, Romance-Comedy): Two men with commitment problems attempt a relationship. (Billy Eichner, Luke MacFarlane, Kristin Chenoweth)

STUFF PEOPLE SAY:
☞ People would pay 108% more than the listed cost of any item they’re shopping for, if it were to last 20 years, according to a new survey. Three in 5 respondents said they’re more inclined to spend money on quality items than something that’s cheaper both in price and quality. Examples of some things that people agreed are always worth paying more for, provided they last longer than average, included cars (34%), kitchen appliances (34%), cookware (30%), TVs (28%) and phones (26%). (Yeah, those all last so long that they go out of style!)
☞ A quarter of people would rather shave their head than contact customer support — and that’s not the only extreme some are willing to go to. A survey of 2,000 Americans also found that instead of going through the tedious process of contacting a customer service agent, pleading their case, and trying to come to some sort of resolution, respondents would rather do their taxes (30%), go to the dentist (28%) or go to the DMV (25%). 22% said they’d even choose a night in jail over dealing with a customer support rep. (The joke’s on us – Those large companies with customer support lines wouldn’t have it any other way!)
-NYPost, SWNS

AUTUMN’Y ACHE:
It’s gone from a flavor to a whole season. Pumpkin spice season, which unofficially began on the last Tuesday of August when Starbucks released its fall drinks menu, is now a full-fledged phenomenon. How so? Well, for example, 10 years ago, more people searched Google for “candy corn” than “pumpkin spice” every fall. Now? Pumpkin spice is the more popular search term worldwide by a wide margin. In the past year, Americans purchased more than $236 million in pumpkin-spice-flavored grocery items, a 24% increase over the previous year. And that doesn’t include Starbucks! What’s more, it also doesn’t include some of these unexpected products, now available in Pumpkin Spice varieties: Breakfast cereal, granola bars, hot chocolate, pet treats, baby food, beer, ramen, Goldfish crackers, Spam…and deodorant! By the way, the 2 most popular pumpkin spice items are cookies and pie filling. For the record, Amazon’s not saying how many pumpkin spice products it sells, but a keyword search turned up more than 138,000 items.
(Apparently, there’s nothing that can’t be pumpkinized!)
(But remember, if you’re addicted, you can always try a pumpkin patch!)
-TheGuardian

NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A British pub owner concerned that his country is running out of people named ‘Nigel’ staged a festival for men with the name – and they showed up from all over the world. Nigel Smith held the “Nige-fest” last weekend, gathering hundreds of Nigels together for a pint. Entertainment was provided by musicians called Nigel, and attendees, who were required to present photo ID, signed the “the book of Nigel” at the Fleece Inn, in Bretforton, England. Nigel Smith came up with the idea after the name became officially extinct, according to new birth records, in 2016 and 2020. The annual event set the world record for the largest gathering of Nigels with 432 in 2019. This year’s Nige-fest turned up a total of 372 Nigels for an evening of Nigel-themed refreshment. (One 372 this year? He’s right – they ARE going extinct!)
➢ A man who spent $150,000 and traveled 75,000 miles (120,000km) to 100 countries to find the world’s worst public toilet says he has finally found it — in Tajikistan. Travel writer Graham Askey – known as “King of the Porcelain” – scanned the globe for the most disgusting loos, and says he has found the “perfect hell hole” – a ramshackle tent that is so bad, those desperate enough to use it must scurry over sun-dried poo. But the “most repellent thing of all”, he says, is that its fabric walls are used as toilet paper. Apparently, some ‘wall’ sections have been torn off and discarded on the cubicle floor. Graham says there’s also a danger of disturbing deadly snakes and fearless rats, which have made their homes in the nearby rocks. Other loos that made his list of the 36 ‘crappiest crappers’ in his new book “Toilets of the Wild Frontier” include a sink in Bangladesh, a bath containing “liters of number ones and twos” in China – with the plug left in, and a wooden chair with a toilet seat in Benin — which is perched prominently upon a raised platform in the middle of the village. (The town “Look out!!”?)
-Talker, SWNS

DID YOU KNOW?
Sure, tipping is a part of our everyday lives – in return for good service. But TikTok users are saying it’s gone too far after an audacious ask from an online furniture store. TikTok’er @spookyweiner shared a shocking discovery she made while making a purchase — a payment page which asked if she would like to tip the company. She explains: “I’m purchasing an office chair online, and they’re asking me if I want to leave a tip.” The image behind her shows a screenshot of her online checkout process, asking if she’d like to leave a tip for the “team,” giving options to leave a 1% tip of $2, 3% tip of $6, or 5% tip of $10. (Is this the tipping point?) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/y3u6m842
-NYPost

BS CHRONOMETER 09.30.22

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Orange Shirt Day” or “National Day for Truth and Reconciliation (in Canada since 2021), to recognize and commemorate the legacy of residential schools where tens of thousands of First Nations children were taken from their families and forced to attend classes that separated them from their culture. It is a holiday for federal government employees and private-sector employees to whom the Canada Labour Code applies, plus workers in BC, MB, NS, PEI, and NT. All are encouraged to wear an orange shirt today. LINKS: https://www.orangeshirtday.org/
https://tinyurl.com/yckhvzkf
• “Ask a Stupid Question Day”, created by some unknown keener who decided that ‘asking a stupid question is better than repairing a stupid mistake’. It’s a good excuse to pose perplexing questions like…
⇒ If our knees were bent the other way, what would a chair look like?
⇒ Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat ‘Macaroni’?
⇒ Can we spell the word ‘creativity’ however we want?
⇒ Can you be a ‘closet claustrophobic’?
⇒ If winning isn’t important … why do we keep score?
⇒ Why aren’t blueberries blue?

• “Hot Mulled Cider Day”, a day to cradle a warm cup of spiced cider in your hands, breathe in the fragrance, and then take a sip. It’s a cool-weather treat for all your senses.
• “Chewing Gum Day”, Thomas Adams received a patent on the first gum-making machine in 1871. After experimenting with different flavors, he manufactured the first flavored gum in the US, the licorice-flavored “Adams’ Black Jack”. Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit and Spearmint soon followed.
• “International Blasphemy Day”, encouraging individuals and groups to openly express criticism of religion, and blasphemy laws. It was founded in 2009 by the Center for Inquiry.
• “International Translation Day”, introduced in 1991 by the International Federation of Translators. Online translators allow you to switch from language-to-language instantly. Try translating an English message to another language then back to English. Odds are you’ll get something that’s really wonky. LINK: http://translate.google.com/#

SATURDAY-
• “October”, which actually means ‘8th month’ but has been the 10th month ever since New Year’s Day was moved from March to January. At other times in history October has been called Germanicus, Herculeus, and Faustinus. So, happy First of Faustinus!
• “Homemade Cookies Day”, What’s the absolute best kind? Chocolate chip? Oatmeal & raisin? Peanut butter? Shortbread? Dirt balls?
• “International Day of Older Persons”, an annual observance begun by the UN to recognize the contributions of older persons and to examine issues that affect their lives.
• “International Music Day”, initiated in 1975 by Lord Yehudi Menuhin to encourage the promotion of musical art among all sections of society.
• “Pumpkin Spice Day”, since 2015, but it was 2003 when the flavor started taking over the world every fall! The first Pumpkin Spice Latte was created in the “Liquid Lab” at Starbucks’ Seattle headquarters in Seattle that year, and within a decade, it became the company’s top-selling drink, with over 200 million sold.
• “International Coffee Day”, Yes, we celebrated “National Coffee Day” 2 days ago. (Another round?)
• “World Vegetarian Day”, to create awareness of the ethical, environmental, health, and humanitarian benefits of a vegetarian lifestyle. (My friend really changed when she became a vegetarian…It’s like I’ve never seen herbivore!) LINK: http://www.worldvegetarianday.org
• “CD Player Day”, between audio cassettes and the MP3, compact discs were the most popular way to listen to music in parts of the 1980s and 1990s, and every CD needed a CD player!
• “Less Than Perfect Day”, a day to accept that it’s okay to not be perfect. Today, remember that we all make mistakes and that we should try hard at everything we do, but not so hard that we stress ourselves out. (I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken…)

SUNDAY-
• “Custodial Workers Day”, honoring those who clean up after the rest of us. Nicer names for ‘Janitor’ include: ‘Caretaker’, ‘Maintenance Coordinator’, and ‘Sanitation Engineer’.
• “Name Your Car Day”. Polls show that about 15% of people have a pet name for their vehicle. (What’s yours?)
• “International Day of Non-Violence”, observed on the birthday of Mahatma Gandhi. This day is referred to in India as “Gandhi Jayanti”.
• “World Farm Animal Day”, as declared by the ‘Farm Animal Reform Movement’ to memorialize the “needless suffering and death” of billions of innocent farm animals each year. It also honors the birthday of Gandhi, who was a champion of humane farming.
• “World No Alcohol Day”, Finally! A day to dry out after celebrating Beer Day, Wine Day, Margarita Day, Bloody Mary Day, Martini Day, Mai Tai Day, Pina Colada Day…you see where I’m going here.
• “Guardian Angel Day”, a special time to think about, appreciate, and give thanks to them for watching over us.

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [68] Barry Williams, Santa Monica CA, TV actor (‘Greg’ on “The Brady Bunch” 1969-74)

1957 [65] Fran Drescher, New York City NY, TV actress (“The Nanny” 1993-99, “Happily Divorced” 2011-13)

1961 [61] Eric Stoltz, Whittier CA, movie actor (“Mask”, “Some Kind of Wonderful”)

1963 [59] Eddie Montgomery, Danville KY, country singer (Montgomery Gentry-‘Back When I Knew It All’)

1964 [58] Robby Takac, Buffalo NY, rock bassist-singer (Goo Goo Dolls-‘Slide’, ‘Iris’)

1971 [51] Jenna Elfman, Los Angeles CA, TV actress (“Dharma & Greg” 1997-2002, “Fear the Walking Dead” since 2018)

1975 [47] Marion Cotillard, Paris France, movie actress (“The Dark Knight Rises”, “Midnight in Paris”)

1982 [40] Lacey Chabert, Purvis MS, TV actress (“Party of Five” 1994-2000)/movie actress (“Mean Girls”)

1982 [40] Kieran Culkin, New York NY, movie actor (“Father of the Bride” movies, “Igby Goes Down”)/TV actor (“Succession” since 2018)/brother of Macaulay Culkin

1984 [38] T-Pain (Faheem Rasheed Najm), Tallahassee FL, hip-hop/R&B singer-songwriter (Flo-Rida ft. T-Pain-‘Low’)/2019 winner in inaugural season of “The Masked Singer”

1992 [30] Ezra Miller, Wyckoff NJ, movie actor (“Justice League”, “The Flash”, “Fantastic Beasts” movies)

SATURDAY- former US President Jimmy Carter is 98; [Dame] Julie Andrews (“The Sound of Music”) is 87; Randy Quaid (“National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation”) is 72; former UK Prime Minister Theresa May is 66; Zach Galifianakis (“The Hangover” films) is 53; Sarah Drew (“Grey’s Anatomy”) is 42; Brie Larson (“Captain Marvel”) is 33

SUNDAY- Don McLean (‘American Pie’) is 77; Donna Karan (DNKY fashion house founder) is 74; Sting (The Police) is 71; Kelly Ripa (“Live With Kelly & Ryan”) is 52; Tiffany (‘I Think We’re Alone Now’) is 50; Sam Roberts (‘Brother Down’) is 48; Mike Rodden (Hinder) is 40; Brittany Howard (Alabama Shakes) is 34

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1960 [62] “The Flintstones” debuts. It is the first animated series to hold a prime-time slot on television

2017 [05] “Let’s Make a Deal” host Monty Hall dies at 96

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1995 [27] Mariah Carey’s ‘Fantasy’ becomes the second single to debut at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 (the first was Michael Jackson’s ‘You Are Not Alone’). It stays at the top for 8 weeks

2012 [10] Faith Hill becomes the first country artist to debut a song on Twitter, when she posts ‘American Heart’

2021 [01] 95-year-old Tony Bennett releases “Love For Sale”, an album of standards with Lady Gaga, making him the Guinness record holder as the oldest person to release an album of new material

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2004 [18] The first images of a live Giant Squid in its natural habitat are taken 600 miles (965 km) south of Tokyo, Japan

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Before finally being accepted, J.K. Rowling’s original “Harry Potter” pitch was rejected by 12 publishers.
✓ The blue whale’s heart is the size of a VW Beetle and weighs up to 1,000 lbs (453 kg).
✓ Ear wax is actually a type of sweat.
✓ The big toe carries the most weight of all the toes, bearing about 40% of the load.
✓ Being hungry causes serotonin to drop, causing anxiety, stress, anger, and sadness.
✓ A man named Ronald MacDonald robbed a Wendy’s restaurant in 2005.
-BestLife, WhattheFFacts

Best of BS . . .
BS MAN-COLD SYMPTOMS:
• Complains every 2 minutes that he is “dying” but never actually does.
• Wants Mommy.
• Inability to do anything for himself…
• …He can, however play video games.
• Sneezes that make the earth tremble.
• Visits doctor, refuses medicine.
• Hungry. But he’s always hungry.
• Can still go to weekend football game despite being on deathbed all week.
• Confuses wife with his Mommy.
• Exaggeration, apparently.
-Twitter, first published in Bs in 2021

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Christian Bale says he had to “isolate” from Chris Rock on the “Amsterdam” set, saying: “He was so bloody funny I couldn’t act”. (OK, so what explains “Terminator Salvation”?)
➠ The first full week of fall is in the books. (…that time when the Baldwins make their annual switch to the Pumpkin Spice baby wipes…)
➠ You sure can tell it’s Fall. (The crickets in the “Saturday Night Live” audience are gearing up for another long season of vigorous chirping.)
➠ Green Roads, the Florida-based CBD and wellness-products company, has installed 30 cannabis vending machines at malls in New Jersey, New York, Florida, Illinois and Alaska. (They look like regular vending machines, except they have dreads…)
➠ Saturday is International National Coffee Day.  (I love going to a coffee shop for my morning brew. In fact, it’s a good way to possibly meet tomorrow’s biggest screenwriter!)

BS WEB GOODIE:
“Ooops” indeed… (sound up):  https://tinyurl.com/dw9ct9z9

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Preschool rules and bar rules are the same. If you pee your pants, you go home.

PHONE STARTER:
What is the best – or worst — purchase you’ve ever made?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average worker says THIS phrase approximately 3 times per week. What is it?
Answer:  “I need a vacation!”

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.