Thursday, August 18, 2005        Edition: #3097
We’re Bullish on Radio!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TONIGHT Toronto-born comedian Howie Mandel’s new Bravo TV show debuts, a 6-episode series called “Hidden Howie: The Private Life of a Public Nuisance” that combines improv with hidden camera segments . . . TONIGHT & tomorrow, movie director Jonathan Demme will shoot a concert film of Neil Young’s 2-night stand at Nashville’s Ryman Auditorium as he performs music from his new album “Prairie Wind”, due SEPTEMBER 27th . . . Canadian music icon Leonard Cohen has filed a $5-million lawsuit against his ex-business manager, claiming she stole millions from his personal bank account while he was away at a Zen temple (hey Lenny, she was just helping you ‘relinquish all worldly possessions’)  . . . The Beatles, Rolling Stones & Elton John will be among the first celebrities honored on London’s new ‘Avenue of Stars’, the UK version of the Hollywood Walk of Fame (actually suggested by an ITV producer after visiting Canada’s Walk of Fame in Toronto) . . . As if Pat O’Brien isn’t annoying enough, Kathie Lee Gifford will be joining TV entertainment news show “The Insider” THIS FALL as a ‘special correspondent’ . . . And here’s good news, losers: It’s now cool to be uncool as Hollywood seems to be gleefully embracing dorkdom in the upcoming movies “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” and “The Baxter”, and the recent success “Napoleon Dynamite”.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Ashanti – TODAY she’s on the syndicated “Ellen DeGeneres Show”.
• Britney Spears – She went on an after-hours shopping spree at exclusive Beverly Hills baby store Petit Tresor, where she spent about $10,000 on baby clothes … for a boy.
• Clay Aiken – He’s put his 6-bedroom San Fernando Valley house up for sale for $2.5 million after deciding to ditch Los Angeles and move back home to Raleigh, North Carolina.
• Eminem – He’s cancelled his European tour that was scheduled to begin in Germany SEPTEMBER 1st. The enigmatic reason given: ‘Exhaustion, complicated by other medical issues’.
• Jason Mraz – He says he continues to smoke cigarettes because he believes anything that makes you happy is good for you. He knows smoking isn’t good for the body but claims it is good for his soul.
• Kelly Clarkson – A former high school teacher remembers she once showed up for class wearing a flannel nightgown and slippers.
• Madonna – She only started riding late THIS SPRING and is still categorized as a novice, perhaps explaining her riding accident THIS WEEK at her UK country estate.
• Sting – He says he needs all 7 of the houses he owns. Otherwise, heaven forbid, he’d have to carry luggage when he travels.

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
Actress Melanie Griffith couldn’t get an acting role so she worked as a stable hand on the set of hubby Antonio Banderas’ upcoming flick “The Legend of Zorro” so she could be near him (opening OCTOBER 28) . . . Bill Murray is in negotiations to once again voice the world’s favorite lasagna-gulping cat in the sequel “Garfield 2″ (wow, bad contract or house payment due?) . . . Though Steven Spielberg first considered Tom Hanks for the role, he now plans to have his “Schindler’s List” star Liam Neeson play Abraham Lincoln in an upcoming bio-film (break out the beard and the stovepipe hat!) . . . Ewan McGregor (“The Island”) & Sophie Okonedo (“Hotel Rwanda”) will star in “Scenes of a Sexual Nature”, a new British comedy that explores various couples’ relationships during a single afternoon on Hampstead Heath in north London . . . A 3rd major Hollywood film about 9/11 is in the works – “Flight 93″, which follows events aboard the United Airlines plane that crashed in rural Pennsylvania . . . And vintage primetime TV soap “Dallas” is finally coming to the bigscreen, and “Inside TV” mag reports that original star Larry Hagman wants Bruce Willis to play the role of ‘JR’.

MEDIEVAL MOLARS:
A new study has found that peasants back in the Middle Ages had healthier teeth than most people today. After studying the remains of people buried between the 5th and 9th centuries, researcher Wolfgang Arnold of Germany’s University of Witten/Herdecke found they had far better teeth than their descendants, even though they never brushed. How so? It was apparently thanks to a jaw-breaking diet of raw vegetables and dry cereal.
– Ananova

THE BODY LANGUAGE OF LIARS:
Listen up, ladies! According to body-language expert Jan Hargrave, author of “Let Me See Your Body Talk”, here are some ways you can tell if a guy is lying to you …
• Bites his lower lip.
• Crosses extremities.
• Rubs his eye.
• Tugs his ear.
(And how about … ‘opens his mouth’?)
– “Cosmopolitan” magazine.

LITTLE BOY:
Nintendo plans to release a smaller version of its popular Game Boy portable game console. The Game Boy Micro will hit stores OCTOBER 2 at a MSRP of $99.99. The 2.8-oz gizmo will play all Game Boy Advance games, but not the newer Nintendo DS titles.
– “USA Today”

THE PERFECT MAN?
Forget waxed chests and rock-hard abs. A new survey finds ladies like their men scruffy, a wee bit chubby – and definitely not ‘metrosexual’. “Playgirl” magazine has asked 2,000 readers what they find sexy in a man and the answers are surprising: 42% say they think love handles are kind of sexy and 47% approve of chest hair. 73% say the want a guy who is a little ‘rough around the edges’. Only 4% of women say size matters – when it comes to a guy’s  wallet.
– “Daily News”

REAL WEDDING CRASHERS:
The Best Guests Center, based in Jodhpur, India, rents out wedding guests to families who fear they will have a bad turn-out for the big day. Guests can be leased in either traditional Indian attire or wearing smart Western clothes, according to requirements and budget. The paid guests promise to dance and party without letting anyone know they are being paid to do it. Why would there be a market for this? The break-up of traditional families and lack of affection among extended relatives.
– “The Statesman”

FACTS ABOUT LUNCH:
• 82% of us regularly spend 30 minutes or less on lunch. 43% as little as 15 minutes or less.
• 58% of us say think lunch is of such little importance that we skip it altogether when busy.
• 40% of us eat lunch alone.
• 35% of us eat lunch while we do something else, such as driving or working.
• 33% feel tired or moody when lunch is skipped; 20% have problems concentrating or thinking.
– Netscape Careers & Jobs

YOU CAN BE A HERO … FOR A FEE:
Stephen King, Amy Tan, Lemony Snicket, John Grisham, Dave Eggers and several other best-selling authors are selling the right to name characters in their new novels. The profits will go to the ‘First Amendment Project’, which defends the free-speech rights of activists, writers and artists. The auction begins SEPTEMBER 1st on eBay, and runs for 25 days.
– AP

GOSSIP IS GOOD:
According to David Sloan Wilson, an anthropology professor at State University of New York-Binghamton, gossip offers many benefits to today’s society. And we quote: “While there has been a tendency to denigrate gossip as sloppy and unreliable, [it in fact ] appears to be a very sophisticated, multi-functional interaction which is important in policing behaviors in a group and defining group membership.” (Translation: Slagging famous folks is fun.)
– “NY Times”

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• Humans, on average, bite at 170 pounds of force.
• The fastest growing nail is on the middle finger.

THE BULL SHEET 08.18.2K4

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1937 [68] Robert Redford, Santa Monica CA, movie director (“A River Runs Through It”)/movie actor (“The Horse Whisperer”)/Sundance Film Festival founder

1952 [53] Patrick Swayze, Houston TX, movie actor (“Dirty Dancing”)/vapid pop singer (“She’s Like the Wind”)

1955 [50] Steve Wilkinson, Belleville ON, country singer (The Wilkinsons-“Jimmy’s Got a Girlfriend”)/father of Tyler & Amanda

1957 [48] Denis Leary, Worcester MA, TV actor (“Rescue Me”)/movie actor (“The Thomas Crown Affair”)

1969 [36] Christian Slater (Hawkins), NYC, stage actor (“One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”)/movie actor (“Broken Arrow”)/ex-con/lapdance fan

1969 [36] Edward Norton, Columbia MD, movie actor (“The Italian Job”) who has dated actress Salma Hayek & rocker Courtney Love

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “Bad Poetry Day”, a day to compose some really rotten rhyme as revenge against all that ‘good poetry’ you were forced to study in school.

SATURDAY, the oldest, continuously-held sporting event in the USA, the “Natural Chimneys Jousting Tournament”, charges into Mt Solon VA, replete with horses, lances, swords and body armor – just like in medieval England!
PHONER: 888.430.2267/540.350.2785 (Susie Casady)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1995 [10] Dick Assman, whose picture was featured in an ad for a Regina SK gas station, guests on David Letterman’s show after a month’s-worth of constant ribbing in “Late Show’s” ‘Dick Assman Updates’

1999 [06] Planet Hollywood restaurant chain, famous for celebrity investors Demi Moore, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger & Sylvester Stallone, files for bankruptcy protection (the chain’s still operating but Schwarzenegger has since bailed out)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1977 [28] The Police (Sting, Andy Summers & Stewart Copeland) play their debut gig at Rebecca’s Club in Birmingham, England

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1859 [146] 1st to cross Niagara Falls on a tightrope (40,000 watch Charles ‘The Great’ Blondin carry his manager on his back and hoist a stove on which he then cooks an omelet – 160 feet in the air!)

1900 [105] 1st use of the word ‘Television’ (some guy named Perskyi in France)

1922 [83] 1st ‘Caesar Salad’ is concocted in Tijuana, Mexico (named for ‘Caesar’s Restaurant’)

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs-Aug 28] Central Canada Exhibition [Ottawa]
[Fri-Sept 5] Canadian National Exhibition [Toronto]
[Fri] “Red Eye”, “The 40 Year-Old Virgin” & “Valiant” open in movie theaters / National Aviation Day
[Fri-Aug 24] 2005 National Scrabble Championship [Reno NV]
[Sat-Sept 5] Pacific National Exhibition [Vancouver]
[Sun] Homeless Animals Day
[Sun] Rolling Stones kick off world tour [Boston]
[Sun] 9th Wreck Beach Bare Buns Run [Vancouver]
[Mon] Tooth Fairy Day
This Week Is . . . Reduce the Clutter Week
This Month Is . . . Immunization Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
15 THINGS A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE BY AGE 30:

• One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come.
• A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.
• Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.
• A purse, a suitcase and an umbrella you’re not ashamed to be seen carrying.
• A youth you’re content to move beyond.
• A past juicy enough that you’re looking to forward to retelling it in your old age.
• The realization that you are actually going to have an old age – and some money set aside to help fund it.
• An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account – all of which nobody has access to but you.
• A résumé that is not even the slightest bit padded.
• One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.
• A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.
• Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.
• The belief that you deserve it.
• A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don’t get better after 30.
• A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better.
– “Glamour” magazine, September 2005.

BS PREPOSTEROUS PRODUCTS:
Some of these are actual new products that are on the market. Others are totally made-up. Have a contestant try to determine which are which …
• Napoleon Dynamite Talking Key Chain [REAL]
• Inflatable Beer Cooler [REAL]
• Inflatable Dart Board [BS]
• Persian Rug Mouse Mats [REAL]
• Fake Tofu … looks like the real thing but is made of meat. [BS]
• Solar-Powered Flashlight [BS]
• Welcome mat inscribed with the message ‘Nice Underwear’ [REAL]
• Glow-in-the-Dark Sunglasses [BS]
• Pedestrian Turn Signals [REAL]
• Powdered Water [BS]

BS PHONE STARTERS:
• If you had the power to hypnotize someone for a day, who would you pick and what would you have them do?
• If you had to constantly carry a weapon of some kind, what would it be?

BS BLATANT JOKES:
• Oops, pardon me for being so cruel. Some people are just so nice to be nasty to.
• [Co-host] just joined a new organization called ‘DAMN’ … Naked Mothers Against Dyslexia.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: We use these every day but half of us admit that we NEVER clean them.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Pillows.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
News is the first rough draft of history.  – Ben Bradlee


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