April 18, 2008

Friday, April 18, 2008        Edition: #3757
Thanks For Being On Our Sheet List!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Britney Spears has reportedly gone back into the recording studio but sometime manager Larry Rudolph says it’s ‘just for fun’ (whatever that means) . . . The restraining order against Britney’s former advisor Sam Lufti has been extended once again, this time until JULY 31st (time to find yourself a new mark, dude) . . . Meantime, pregnant little sis’ Jamie Lynn Spears & BF Casey Aldridge are house-hunting, putting in a $300,000-ish offer on a 3-bedroom house in Liberty, Mississippi (with indoor plumbing!) . . . Former “Beverly Hills 90210” actress Jennie Garth has fueled speculation she’s returning to a planned new CW incarnation of the series after abruptly quitting the TV pilot for “My Best Friend’s Girl” . . . In her new autobiography cleverly called “sTori Telling”, former “Beverly Hills 90210” actress Tori Spelling says she loves her gay icon status because she’s a ‘huge fan’ of homosexuals (apparently gays aren’t individuals they’re just an entity) . . . In his new autobiography “Up Till Now”, actor William Shatner says he was shocked to discover that his TV castmates on “Star Trek” hated him (maybe … because … all those in … appropriate pauses made scenes drag … on forever) . . . A hit-upon woman claims sometime actor David Hasselhoff uses his assistant to pick up women (what else are assistants for?) . . . THIS WEEK “The Biggest Loser” finalé (NBC) was a ratings winner and now the show is coming out with its own line of pre-made dinners (for only $100 a week they’ll bring ‘em right to your door – so you don’t have to move your fat ass off the couch) . . . And – meow! – Paris Hilton has just made the startlingly accurate observation that Kim Kardashian’s butt looks like ‘cottage cheese stuffed in a trash bag’ (but you shouldn’t judge, size-11-webbed-foot wonder!).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Busta Rhymes – He’s teamed with Linkin Park for his new single, “We Made It”, featured on his new album “Blessed”. The rapper & the rockers shot a video for the track in LA THIS WEEK.
• matchbox twenty –  A booking company for “Cheyenne Frontier Days” is suing animal rights group SHARK (‘Showing Animals Respect & Kindness’) for allegedly using false and misleading info to persuade the band to cancel their performance at THIS SUMMER’s Wyoming rodeo.
• My Chemical Romance – Frontman Gerard Way has called for an end to violence against emo fans during a Mexico City concert. The city has experienced a wave of attacks against teens who’ve adopted the dark & brooding emo look.
• Sheryl Crow – She’s set to hit the road THIS SUMMER for the first time since adopting her 11-month-old son, Wyatt, whom she plans to take along on the 25-date tour.
• Toby Keith – When primary shooting on his upcoming movie “Beer for My Horses” concluded, he presented special-edition custom-built guitars to his castmates, including Ted Nugent, Mel Tillis, and Mac Davis.
• Velvet Revolver – Slash now admits he forced frontman Scott Weiland to leave the band by deliberately ignoring him throughout their recent UK tour.

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• Alicia Keys – SATURDAY she kicks off her 2-month “As I Am“ North American tour in Hampton VA, with support from 2007 “American Idol” winner Jordin Sparks.
• BAFTA TV Awards – SUNDAY the annual British Academy Television Awards at the London Palladium are highlighted by a 26th acting nomination for Judi Dench, this time for her role in the BBC drama series “Cranford”.
• “Brothers & Sisters” (ABC) – SUNDAY the plot of a new post-strike episode matters little as most of us will be focusing on Rob Lowe to see if he appears as creepy as his hired help claims.
• “Doctor Who” (Sci Fi) – TONIGHT guest star Kylie Minogue plays a waitress aboard the “Titanic” … or is she?
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV) – THIS AFTERNOON hot new country act Lady Antebellum (“Love Don’t Live Here”) performs.
• Foxy Brown – TODAY the rapper is scheduled to be released early from NYC’s Riker’s Island Prison after serving about 7 months of a 12-month sentence for breaking parole conditions.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – TONIGHT UK alt-rocker Morrissey is a guest.
• “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” (NBC): TONIGHT English indie rock band The Kooks are on.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Vampire Weekend is the musical guest as actress Amy Adams (“Enchanted”) hosts.
• Tiger Jam XI – SATURDAY the annual Tiger Woods Foundation benefit at the Mandalay Bay Events Center in Las Vegas is scheduled to be headlined by Van Halen.
NET: http://www.tigerwoodsfoundation.org/tigerjam/
• “Today Show” (NBC) – THIS MORNING Ashlee Simpson will reveal the shocking news that she’s still not pregnant.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “88 Minutes” ( R-Rated Crime Thriller ): Al Pacino plays a college prof who moonlights as a forensic psychiatrist for the FBI. After he  receives a death threat telling him he has 88 minutes to live, he has to scramble to solve his own murder before it happens. Co-stars Amy Brenneman (“Private Practice”) & Benjamin McKenzie (“OC”). Vancouver stands in for Seattle.
NET: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/88minutes/
• “The Forbidden Kingdom” ( PG-13 Action Comedy ): Martial arts movie vets Jackie Chan & Jet Li co-star for the first time in this variation on the Chinese legend of the ‘Monkey King’. Michael Angarano plays a kung-fu obsessed American teen who’s transported back to ancient China, where he joins up with a band of martial-arts warriors.
NET: http://www.forbiddenkingdommovie.com/
• “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” ( R-Rated Romantic Comedy ): Kristen Bell (“Veronica Mars“) plays a TV star who jets off to Hawaii for a vacation with her new boyfriend (UK DJ Russell Brand) only to discover the guy she just dumped (“How I Met Your Mother’s” Jason Segel) has picked the exact same resort to lick his wounds. Produced by Judd Apatow (“Knocked Up”).
NET: http://www.forgettingsarahmarshall.com/
• “Pathology” ( R-Rated Crime Thriller ): It’s sort of “Grey’s Anatomy” meets “CSI” as a group of clever medical students devise a deadly game to see who among them can commit the perfect murder. Stars Milo Ventimiglia (“Heroes”) and Alyssa Milano (“Charmed”).
NET: http://www.enterpathologylab.com/

‘BIG D’ GRAND PRIZE:
Australian men’s magazine “Zoo Weekly” is stirring up controversy by offering a grand prize of an all-expense-paid divorce in its latest readers’ contest. As well as helping you obtain the parting decree absolute from your wife, the mag promises to help you hook up with new fun girls by sending you out on few dates after the divorce is finalized. It’s inventive but not as controversial as LAST YEAR’s contest. That’s when the magazine offered readers a chance to win their girlfriends a boob-job by sending in shots of her cleavage. (The double-D grand prize.)
– News.com.au

MEMORY POSITIONING:
New research suggests that what we remember of any given experience depends heavily on whatever else is happening around us at the moment. Our mood, environment, even posture can influence memories. For instance, studies suggest that if you learn a word while you happen to be slouching, you’ll be better able to remember that word at a later time if you are slouching than if you’re standing upright. (New pickup line: “I’m trying to remember what love is.”)
– “New York Times”

WIDE OF THE MARK:
An analysis of 15 professional tennis tournaments has revealed that line judges are wrong 40% of the time when challenged by players. University of Sussex researchers analyzed video of close to 1,500 challenges made by 246 players to come up with the figure. That said, it was also found that in more than half the challenges, the ball was less than an inch (2.25 cm) from the line, a tiny margin for error. (But apparently enough to justify tossing your racquet.)
– “The Guardian”

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• According to calculations by somebody with far too much time on their hands, actor Willem Dafoe has died on the movie screen more times than any other living actor.
– StarPulse.com
• Studies show that, on average, people tell 1-or-2 lies a day with the intention of deceiving.
– CosmoDaily

BS CHRONOMETER 04.18.08

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1947 [61] James Woods, Vernal UT, TV actor (‘Sebastian Stark’ on “Shark” since 2006)/movie actor (“The Ghosts of Mississippi”, “Salvador”)

1953 [55] Rick Moranis, Toronto ON, movie actor (“Ghostbusters”, “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids”)/former TV comic (‘McKenzie Brothers’ on “SCTV”)

1956 [52] Eric Roberts, Biloxi MS, movie/TV actor/Julia Roberts’ bitter big brother who’s made over 100 films but gets none of the acclaim she does

1963 [45] Eric McCormack, Toronto ON, TV actor (“Will & Grace” 1998-2006)

1963 [45] Conan O’Brien, Brookline MA, TV host (“Late Night with Conan O’Brien” since 1993)/future “Tonight Show” host (2009)/cousin of actor Denis Leary

1980 [28] Robyn Regehr, Recife, Brazil, NHL defenceman (Calgary Flames)

1984 [24] America Ferrera, LA CA, TV actress (‘Betty Suarez’ on “Ugly Betty” since 2006)

SATURDAY –
Hip-hop  impresario Suge Knight is 43; Movie actress Ashley Judd (“Kiss the Girls”) is 40; Movie actor James Franco (“Spider-Man”) is 30; Movie actress Kate Hudson (“Fool’s Gold”) is 29; Movie actor Hayden Christensen (“Star Wars”) is 27; MLB player Curtis Thigpen (1B-Toronto Blue Jays) is 25; Tennis player Maria Sharapova is 21.

SUNDAY –
Movie actress Jessica Lange (“A Thousand Acres”) is 59; Movie actress Carmen Electra (“Meet the Spartans”) Is 36.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “International Jugglers Day”. You and a partner can do some radio juggling, or at least create the SFX, simply by quickly patting your chest or knees … whichever’s flattest.
• “Look-Alike Day”, a day for people who are constantly mistaken for rich and famous celebrities to have some recognition of their own. So who do people say YOU look like?
• “Pet Owners Independence Day”, a day when dog and cat owners are encouraged to take the day off and have their pets work in their place, since most are unemployed and sleep all day.
NET: http://www.wellcat.com/pet_owner.htm
• “Teach Children to Save Day”, another way of planning for your retirement besides contributing to that constantly quivering mutual fund.
• “Wear Your Pajamas to Work Day”, as declared by pajama-maker PajamaGram. The idea is to give yourself a comfort break. (And perhaps create the opportunity to look for a new job.)
NET: http://store.yahoo.com/pajamagram/wearpjstowork.html

SATURDAY –
• “Garlic Day”, saluting the ‘stinking rose’ that has been cultivated as long as history has been recorded.
• “Husband Appreciation Day”, observed annually on the 3rd SATURDAY of APRIL as a day to appreciate your mate for all that he is and all the things he does for you. BTW, “Wife Appreciation Day” is coming up in SEPTEMBER.
• “Passover” begins at sunset, the 8-day Jewish celebration of the flight of the Israelites from Egyptian slavery in the 1200’s BCE. A ceremonial Seder takes place on the first 2 nights, when symbolic foods such as unleavened bread are placed on the table.
• “Record Store Day”, the 1st to be observed by hundreds of independently-owned music stores with the purpose of celebrating ‘the culture they offer and unique place they occupy in their communities’. Freebie hand-outs and live in-store performances are planned. Recording artists participating include Metallica and Steve Earle.(The real reason for the observance – in the download era many record stores are struggling to survive.)
NET: http://www.recordstoreday.com/

SUNDAY –
• “420” or “Pot Smokers Day”, a day of celebration for marijuana enthusiasts. The name is apparently derived from 4:20 pm, the secret ‘burn time’ of pot-smoking high school students in San Rafael CA back in 1971. Groovy.
• “Lima Bean Respect Day”, a day of appreciation for the legume many people hate. Maybe we could start by pronouncing it correctly … LEEM-uh bean?
• “Pink Moon”, the Full Moon of APRIL which takes its name from wild ground phlox, one of the earliest widespread flowers of Spring. It’s also been known as the ‘Egg Moon’, the ‘Fish Moon’ and the ‘Sprouting Grass Moon’.
• “Volunteer Recognition Day”, honoring the legions of volunteers who dedicate themselves to causes and helping people, animals, and nature.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1938 [70] Jerry Siegel & Joe Shuster see their cartoon creation ‘Superman’ launched in “Action Comics #1”, which is actually cover-dated JUNE (approximate present-day value for a near-mint condition copy … $1,380,000)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1984 [24] Michael Jackson has scalp surgery in an LA hospital to repair damage after his hair catches fire during the filming of a Pepsi commercial

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1934 [74] 1st Laundromat opens, in Fort Worth TX – ‘The Washateria’ (be sure to say it with a Texas accent)

1955 [53] 1st use of the term ‘Third World’ (President Sukarno of Indonesia)

1955 [53] 1st ‘Walk/Don’t Walk’ lighted street signals appear, in NYC (later replaced with pictograms)

COMING UP . . .
[Sat] NBA playoffs begin
[Mon] St George’s Day Holiday (NL)
[Mon] 112th Boston Marathon
[Mon-Apr 27] 14th International TV-Turnoff Week
[Tues] Earth Day
[Tues] Jelly Bean Day
[Wed] 39th GMA Dove Awards (Nashville)
[Wed] Tribeca Film Festival begins (NYC)
[Wed] World Lab Animal Day
[Wed] Administrative Professionals Day
This Week Is … Bike Safety Week
This Month Is … Sea Cadet Month

BULL’S BITS

MORE BS QUESTIONS PLAGUING HUMANITY:
• Why do kids learn math when they could just use calculators like the grown-ups?
• Why can’t the postman give it to the garbage man and save us the hassle?
• If a job is canceled, do hit men get a ‘kill fee’?
• How many kids actually run away? Don’t most of them walk?
• Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Don’t judge a book by it’s cover … judge it by the movie.

BS TOP SWAPS:
The week’s most requested music files online …
5. Leona Lewis – “Bleeding Love”
4. Lil Wayne f/Static Major – “Lollipop”
3. Sara Bareilles – “Love Song“
2. Chris Brown – “With You”
1. Flo Rida f/T-Pain – “Low”
– Big Champagne Online Music Measurement

BS PHONE STARTERS:
• A federal judge has upheld a proposed NYC regulation requiring calories to be posted on the menu boards of chain restaurants as a method of helping to reduce obesity. Good idea?
• If you could be married to someone famous from the past who is no longer alive, who would you like it to be?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: In the Andes, time is often measured by how long it takes to perform THIS unhealthy activity.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Smoke a cigarette.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Happiness is working in your own area code.

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