April 18, 2006

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Tuesday, April 18, 2006        Edition: #3263
Thanks For Being On Our Sheet List!

TODAY “Canadian Idol” holds its latest round of auditions at the Village Shopping Centre in St John’s NL . . . TONIGHT Rod Stewart is scheduled to take a turn coaching the 7 remaining “American Idol” hopefuls, and will perform at some point . . . Catholic group Opus Dei is calling for the moviemakers of “The Da Vinci Code” to include a disclaimer out of respect for their beliefs, but a Sony Pictures spokesperson says uh-uh – the film’s designed to be a thriller, not a religious tract . . . A Namibian newspaper says Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt will have their baby in that country and are considering giving it a Namibian name . . . Meantime, locals are said to be fed up with Brangelina’s security team led by one Mickey Brett, who has reportedly closed off roads around the resort where the couple is staying, chased local kids off public beaches, and threatened photographers with physical violence . . . 26-year-old Backstreet Boy Nick Carter is facing allegations of sexual assault after hosting a pair of Wisconsin women at a friend’s home in Key West FL . . . A pair of reality shows that had quick jumpstarts, FOX-TV’s “Unan1mous” and Simon Cowell’s “American Inventor” on ABC-TV, are both losing huge chucks of their audience even more quickly . . . “American Idol” & Elvis Presley Enterprises owner CKX is considering a new ‘Elvis’ cabaret show for Las Vegas which would legally prevent anyone else from dressing up like the star – thereby putting an estimated 30,000 Elvis impersonators out of work . . . Former “Baywatch” babe Gena Lee Nolin & Edmonton-born Calgary Flames defenceman Cale Hulse have a new son, Hudson Lee, born in Scottsdale AZ . . . And “NY Times” movie critic Nathan Lee describes “Scary Movie 4″ as being – ‘cleverly stupid’ (if that’s what it takes to be #1, we’re well on our way!).

• Bubba Sparxxx – TONIGHT he performs “Ms New Booty” with the Ying Yang Twins on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno”.
• Daniel Powter – THIS MORNING he’s on syndicated TV’s “Live With Regis & Kelly”.
• Elton John – After Disney/Pixar shelved his proposed musical, “Gnomeo & Juliet”, set in the world of tacky garden gnomes, he’s taken the project to Miramax. The animated twist on Shakespeare’s romance will be produced in Britain.
• 50 Cent – TONIGHT he’s on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien”.
• James Blunt – His ex-girlfriend Camilla Boler has confirmed reports their 2-year relationship is over. Why? Since “You’re Beautiful” hit it big, Blunt has been linked to British socialite Tara Palmer-Tomkinson, Czech model Petra Nemcova and Pussycat Dolls singer Jessica Sutta.
• Toby Keith – He’s discovered the sport of curling and has hopes of competing for the US Olympic team. THIS AFT he guests on the “Ellen DeGeneres Show”.
• Train – TONIGHT they do “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” on CBS-TV.
• In music stores TODAY: Erasure’s “Union Street”; “ Under the Covers, Vol 1″ from Susanna Hoffs, Matthew Sweet & others; Stereophonics’ “Live from Dakota”; Hil St Soul’s “SOULidified”; “Emerson, Lake & Palmer: Birth of a Band – Live at the Isle of Wight”; and the Goo Goo Dolls’ 8th studio album, “Let Love In”.

• “Hostel” (Horror): Quentin Tarantino ‘presents’ this gruesome horror film by Eli Roth about a trio of backpackers in Eastern Europe who end up in a hostel that turns out to be a dungeon. There they are served up as torture subjects to bloodthirsty sadists. Stars Jay Hernandez, Derek Richardson, Eythor Gudjonsson … and buckets upon buckets of blood.
• “Mrs Henderson Presents” (Comedy): Brit actress Judi Dench received an Oscar nomination for her portrayal of a bored society matron in the 1930s who buys a shuttered theater and stages a music hall show that evolves into London’s first classy nudie revue. Bob Hoskins co-stars as a hard-headed, theatrical producer with whom she has lively battles.
• Also out TODAY: “Hooked”/”The Flaming Teen-age”, a double-feature of 1950s delinquent drug dramas about  high school heroin rings (they make great comedies these days); a new ‘Deluxe Edition’ of “Moonstruck”, the 1987 rom-com that won an Oscar for Cher; and a new ‘Collector’s Edition’ of “Out of Sight”, the 1998 George Clooney-Jennifer Lopez crime thriller.

Most of the things you and your spouse are fighting about today, you’ll still be fighting about a decade from now. According to University of Washington family psychology prof John Gottman, couples argue about the same issues fully 69% of the time. They simply don’t resolve their problems. And Gottman’s long-term study of close to 700 couples may have found the reason for that – many of the problems couples argue about are not actually solvable. (Unless you do in the mother-in-law).
– “Psychology Today”

A statistical breakout of who we are and what we do …
• 98% of Americans think that more than half of Americans are overweight, however, just 39% consider themselves overweight.
• 60% of women in their 20s say they’d consider entering a wet T-shirt contest while on vacation.
• 46% of us never change our answer machine message.
• 41% of clerical workers listen to music for more than 20% of their working day.
• 40% of guys have walked out in the middle of a date without giving it a second thought.
• 15% of babies cry for more than 3 hours a day. The typical baby cries for 1 to 2 hours.
• 10% of women under age 25 have ended a relationship by sending a ‘Dear John’ e-mail.

A trendy new clothing line from Edoc Laundry comes with instructions, not just about laundering them but – how to interpret them. That’s because, in addition to being apparel, the clothes are also an ‘alternate reality game’. Words embedded in the intricate designs are clues to a murder mystery. Each word translates into a secret code that, when entered into the Edoc Website, unlocks a video that explains more of a story. Piece together enough clues and you solve the mystery. (Moms have been doing this for years – “I see by the look of your shirt that you were at a party where there was drinking … somewhere out of town where you shouldn’t have been …”)
NET: http://edoclaundry.com
– “Los Angeles Times”

• The United States will become the world’s biggest consumer of wine by 2008, according to a study by the “International Wines & Spirits Record”.
• Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, 2 rats could have over 1 million descendants.

The European Space Agency is considering an experiment to grow tulips – on the Moon. Scientists think it might be possible because tulips bring their own nutrients with them and can exist without resources from soil. Another plus would be the ability to grow them without interference from squirrels, chipmunks and other pests that dig bulbs up in Earthbound gardens. (But imagine the FTD fees on those deliveries!)
– BBC News

Some people assume that human beings are the only creatures on the planet that have the ability to speak. Not true! Communication is used by a huge number of species, from the simple body language of beetles to the complex song of whales. And somewhere in between is the language of ‘Cat’. Domesticated cats have developed quite a complex form of verbal and physical communication extending far beyond the ‘meow’ that most of us think represents its total scope. Here’s a quick guide to translating your cat’s verbal and body language …
NET: http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A635357
– “Curious Times”

You’ve heard it said about canines and now new research suggests that women also can unconsciously detect the ‘smell of fear’. In experiments at Rice University in Houston TX, people were asked to sniff gauze pads, some containing sweat from the armpits of volunteers who’d watched horror movies. For some unknown reason, women smelling the ‘fear pads’ were far more accurate at determining which belonged to those who’d undergone a frightening experience. (Frightening experience? How about sniffing pads drenched with BO?)
– “New York Times”


1947 [59] James Woods, Vernal UT, movie actor (“The Ghosts of Mississippi”)  FACTOID: He’s now shooting the Spike Lee TV pilot, “Shark”, about a famous LA lawyer who becomes a prosecutor.

1952 [54] Jim Scholten, Midland MI, country singer/musician (Sawyer Brown-“All These Years”)

1953 [53] Rick Moranis, Toronto ON, pseudo country singer (“The Agoraphobic Cowboy”)/movie actor (“Ghostbusters”)/former TV comic (‘McKenzie Brothers’ on “SCTV”)

1956 [50] Eric Roberts, Biloxi MS, movie actor/Julia Roberts’ bitter big brother who’s made over 100 films but gets none of the acclaim she does

1963 [43] Eric McCormack, Toronto ON [raised Calgary AB], TV sitcom actor (‘Will Truman’ on “Will & Grace” 1998-2006)

1963 [43] Conan O’Brien, Brookline MA, TV host (“Late Night with Conan O’Brien” since 1993)/future “Tonight Show” host (2009)/cousin of actor Denis Leary.

• “Great San Francisco Earthquake 100th Anniversary”. On April 18, 1906 one of the worst earthquakes to ever hit North America caused the death of some 700 people and total devastation to some 10,000 acres.
• “International Jugglers Day”. You and a partner can do some radio juggling, or at least create the SFX, simply by quickly patting your chest or knees – whichever’s flattest.
• “Look-Alike Day”, a day for people who are constantly mistaken for rich and famous celebrities to have some recognition of their own.
• “Pet Owners Independence Day”, a day when dog and cat owners are encouraged to take the day off and have their pets work in their place, since most pets are unemployed and sleep all day.  FACTOID: Who takes care of the family pet? Research shows women are in charge when it comes to feeding and grooming, but when its time for a daily walk – that’s male territory!
NET: http://www.wellcat.com/pet_owner.htm
• “Teach Children To Save Day”, another way of planning for your retirement besides contributing to that diving mutual fund.
• “Wear Your Pajamas to Work Day”, as declared by pajama-maker PajamaGram. The idea is to give yourself a comfort break. (And perhaps the opportunity to look for a new job.)
NET: http://store.yahoo.com/pajamagram/wearpjstowork.html

THIS WEEK is “World Lab Animal Week”. A comparison of almost 3,000 research papers published over the past 30 years in major biomedical journals has found a 30% decline in the number of studies using animals. It seems more and more researchers are turning to alternative testing methods.

1956 [50] Movie star Grace Kelly marries Prince Rainier III of Monaco

1975 [31] John Lennon releases “Stand by Me”

1934 [72] 1st Laundromat opens, in Fort Worth TX – ‘The Washateria’ (be sure to say it with a Texas accent)

1955 [51] 1st use of the term ‘Third World’ (President Sukarno of Indonesia)

1955 [51] 1st ‘Walk/Don’t Walk’ lighted street signals appear, in NYC (later replaced with pictograms)

[Wed] Garlic Day
[Thurs] Astronomy Day
[Fri] Queen Elizabeth II’s 80th Birthday
[Fri] Kindergarten Day
[Sat] Earth Day
[Sat] NBA playoffs begin
[Sun] World Lab Animal Day
This Week Is … Bike Safety Week
This Month Is … Sea Cadet Month


• “Prom King & Queen Seek UN Recognition of Their Own Country … Promvania!”
• “Humans Turning Back Into Apes! Sports Fanatics & Politicians Most Susceptible!”
• “Sleep Expert Can Describe a Person Perfectly Just by Hearing Them Snore!”
• “Aliens Travel to Earth for Chinese Takeout!”
• “Biologist Breeds Snail with Cheetah to Create World’s Fastest Snail – The ‘Sneetah’!”

Hype is building for the May 19th worldwide release of the movie version of “The Da Vinci Code”. Among the innovations to help it along …
• Sony Pictures has developed ‘The Da Vinci Quest’, an online puzzle competition for prizes, that includes symbols, codes, maps, puzzles & riddles based on the story. (Available in a US, UK, and Australian version … but not Canadian – boo!)
NET: http://flash.sonypictures.com/movies/davincicodequest/
• The book’s publisher Random House, has it’s own ‘Web Quest’ where participants can attempt to solve riddles, crack the code, and reveal a ‘lost Da Vinci secret’.
NET: http://www.randomhouse.com/doubleday/davinci/index-ctc.html

• Movie star Pierce Brosnan once did this for a living …
a. Real-life secret agent.
b. Life insurance sales rep.
c. Circus fire-eater. [CORRECT]

• Ketchup originally contained none of this …
a. Salt.
b. Sugar.
c. Tomatoes. [CORRECT. When created in 17th-century China, it was made from anchovies, mushrooms, walnuts & kidney beans.]

• Singer Sheryl Crow has 2 of these that are fake …
a. Fur coats.
b. Front teeth. [CORRECT]
c. Engagement rings.

Who is the ugliest female celebrity? And male?

• Would I ask you a rhetorical question?
• The best things in the world are free … and worth every penny of it.

Today’s Question: Simply by doing THIS, you will have more dreams.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Wearing pajamas.

A joke never gains an enemy but often loses a friend.

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