BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ After announcing last week they were ending their 10-year marriage, estranged couple Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin are vacationing on Faith Hill & Tim McGraw’s private island … together. They apparently flew from Eleuthera in the Bahamas to nearby Goat Cay by private plane, then boarded a boat to take them to the 17-acre island owned by the country music stars (the 2 couples bonded when Gwyneth and Tim co-starred in the movie “Country Strong” in 2010). Paltrow and Martin have pledged to stay friends for the sake of their kids.
– Contactmusic.com
★ Former “Roseanne” star Sara Gilbert (39) and singer/songwriter Linda Perry (48) have wed in California. The couple became engaged last year after 2 years of dating, and exchanged vows in a private ceremony over the weekend. The news has been announced by Gilbert’s co-hosts on “The Talk” (CBS) daytime chat show. Guest hosts Carnie Wilson and Marie Osmond are filling in for Gilbert this week as she’s taken time off for a honeymoon.
– WENN.com
★ TV host Chelsea Handler has decided to end her talk show, “Chelsea Lately”, after 7 years on-air. The comic has fronted the late night talk show on E! Network since 2007, but will not renew her contract for any additional seasons. Her manager has confirmed the news and says Handler’s now looking at other career opportunities. She’s apparently open to the possibility of hosting her own radio show or another TV talk show.
– Canoe.ca
★ And the long-awaited remake of “My Fair Lady” has been shelved, according to Emma Thompson. The Brit actress wrote the screenplay for a reboot of the 1964 musical which starred Audrey Hepburn as ‘Eliza Doolittle’, but the project was hit with numerous delays. Keira Knightley and Carey Mulligan were both linked to the lead role, but rumored director Danny Boyle reportedly dropped out and production has simply never gotten off the ground.
– “Daily Mail”

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “American Idol” (FOX/CTV) – Finalists perform the song they first auditioned with.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Eli Young Band (“10,000 Towns”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Birth of Joy (“Prisoner”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV2) – Kongos (“Lunatic”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Joseph Arthur (“The Ballad of Boogie Christ”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Nickel Creek (“A Dotted Line”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Avicii – The Swedish superstar DJ has had to cancel this Friday’s gig in Dubai UAE as he continues to recover from a weekend operation to remove his gallbladder and appendix. Avicii (real name Tim Bergling) remains in a Miami FL hospital.
• Fleetwood Mac – After a 16-year absence, Christine McVie will be re-joining her bandmates as they launch the 33-city “On With the Show” tour September 30th in Minneapolis MN. She’s spent the past 16 years living a quiet life out of the music biz in the English countryside.
• Lady Antebellum – Tonight at the annual Grammys On the Hill Awards in Washington DC, they’re being presented with the ‘Recording Artists Coalition Award’ for their excellence in both music and philanthropic efforts.
• Madonna – She’s being tapped to direct “Ade: A Love Story”, a movie adaptation of the debut novel by Rebecca Walker. It’s the story of a 19-year-old American student who falls in love with a young Muslim man while traveling in Africa.
• Michael Jackson – Nearly 5 years after his death, his posthumous “Xscape” album is due out May 13th, featuring 8 previously unreleased tracks ‘contemporized’ for modern ears by LA Reid, Timbaland, Jroc, and others.
• Pharrell Williams – He’s lined up to be a coach during the upcoming 7th season of NBC-TV’s “The Voice”. He was an adviser to Team Usher during Season 4. The rest of the coaching line-up will be confirmed at a later date.
• Rob Thomas – Tonight he begins a month-long North American headlining tour in Temecula CA. The trek is set to run through May 11th in Windsor ON. The shows are designed to offer ‘a career-spanning set in intimate settings’.

PHONY EYES:
Opticians are worried overexposure to light from tech devices such as smartphones, tablets, computers, and flat-screen TVs may be increasing our risk of long-term eye damage. The danger is due to a combination of not blinking enough and using the devices closer to the eyes than normal. That can cause eye strain, plus the blue violet light cast off by many devices is potentially hazardous to the back of the eyes. It’s also thought that extensive exposure to it can disrupt sleep patterns and affect moods. The warning comes after a survey of 2,000 people under 25 has found they check their phones an average of 32 times a day. Adults in general spend nearly 7 hours-a-day staring at a screen. (If you don’t stop it, you’ll go blind!)
– @BBCNewsbeat

MAYBE JONAH HAD A BAD BACK:
Climbing inside the carcass of a whale was once thought to bring relief to rheumatism sufferers, a new Australian National Maritime Museum exhibit shows. Staying inside the whale for about 30 hours was believed to bring relief from aches and pains for up to 12 months. The odd 19th-century remedy is thought to have started in the whaling town of Eden, on Australia’s southern coast. A rheumatic patient would be lowered inside the carcass of a recently-slaughtered whale leaving just his or her head poking out. Many patients at the time claimed to feel better after undergoing the bizarre procedure. (Well who wouldn’t … after escaping from a putrefying giant fish?)
– “Sydney Morning Herald”

FROM THE BS POLL VAULT:
A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 80% of meals are prepared at home.
• 68% of young adults say they are sick of reality TV.
• 64% of Internet users aged 50-plus would sooner live without TV than their computers.
• 56% of us have felt pressured to do something unethical or illegal at work.
• 40% of people meet their partners in the workplace.
• 5% of children talk on the phone before they go to bed.

ARE WE NARCISSISTIC OR WHAT?
Taking selfies for Instagram is s-o-o-o last season … now there’s a new app that creates selfie figurines! ‘Shapify.me’, an app created by the Russian Artec Group, uses Microsoft Kinect technology to create a 3-D scan of yourself. Once you’re happy with your selfie scan, you simply upload it via the website, order your pint-sized 3-D figurine, and in about a week you’ll receive your ‘shelfie’ which is 1-20th your actual size, about 4-inches-tall. A mini-you will set you back for $79. (Barbie? You better alert Skipper and Ken, because your dream house is about to get a new roommate!)
– Glamour.com

BS BUZZWORDS:
New terms leaking into our lingo …
• ‘Disconnectionist’ – A person who advocates spending time away from online activities, particularly for mental or spiritual rejuvenation. Disconnectionists are big fans of ‘digital detox’, cleansing oneself by foregoing hi-tech tools for a period of time. (Step away from the phone.)
• ‘Glassed Out’ – A vacant look and obliviousness to one’s surroundings caused by reading and operating a Google Glass wearable computer, thereby adding to its dorky image. (We say the next big thing … isn’t.)
• ‘Unicorn’ – A technology company that is less than 10-years-old yet worth more than 1 billion dollars. One report suggests there are more than 2 dozen tech startups that qualify. (This is why a lot of today’s billionaires still have acne.)

WE’VE COME FULL CIRCLE:
Sony has unveiled a tablet barely 7-mm-thick that is built around an A4-sized touchscreen made of electronic paper. The ‘Digital Paper’ tablet uses the E-ink display and lets the user make notes on the documents on-screen. The tablet displays documents in the Adobe PDF format and these can be written upon using the gadget’s stylus. Despite being a touchscreen, the device also retains some of the properties of paper and allows a user to rest a hand on the display while writing. Designed for office use, Sony says the low-power device should work for 3 weeks without needing a recharge. The wi-fi gadget will go on sale in May and should cost circa $1,100. (You use a stylus to write on paper? How old school.)
– BBC Science & Technology

FOR THE RECORD:
The ‘World’s Tallest Ferris Wheel’ has opened this week in Las Vegas. The 550-ft ‘High Roller’ observation wheel is the focal point of the LINQ, a new open-air shopping, dining, and entertainment district on the Las Vegas Strip. At about 51-stories-high, it beats out other famous Ferris wheels, including the Singapore Flyer, the Star of Nanchang in China, and the London Eye. Its 28 cabins can fit up to 1,120 passengers. Once the sun sets, the High Roller’s 2,000 LED lights turn on, and the wheel, which resembles a bicycle tire with a hub and a spindle, turns into a giant kaleidoscope. (Just what they need … more lights in Vegas.)
– USAToday.com

BS SHOCKING FACTS THAT HAPPEN EVERY 5 SECONDS:
Every 5 seconds, 8,666 Snapchats are sent.
Every 5 seconds, 17 million emails are sent.
Every 5 seconds, 47 new websites are created.
Every 5 seconds, 205,000 Facebook posts are posted.
Every 5 seconds, 23,000 tweets are posted.
– Excerpted from BuzzFeed.com

BS CHRONOMETER 04.02.14

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1945 [69] Linda Hunt, Morristown NJ, TV actress (‘Hetty Lange’ on “NCIS: Los Angeles” since 2009)/movie actress (Oscar-“The Year of Living Dangerously”)

1947 [67] Emmylou Harris, Birmingham AL, folk-country singer with 12 Grammy Awards (“Blue Kentucky Girl”, “To Know Him Is to Love Him”)

1961 [53] Christopher Meloni, Washington DC, TV actor (“Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” 1999-2011)/movie actor (“Man of Steel”, “Harold & Kumar” films)  COMING UP: “Sin City: A Dame to Kill For”, opening August 22nd.

1977 [37] Michael Fassbender, Heidelberg, Germany, movie actor (“12 Years a Slave”, “Inglourious Basterds”)  UP NEXT: “X-Men: Days of Future Past”, opening May 23rd.

1979 [35] Jesse Carmichael, Boulder CO, pop keyboardist (Maroon 5-“Moves Like Jagger”, “This Love”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Ferret Day”, celebrating those cute & cuddly little pets that are the domesticated form of the European polecat, a mammal belonging to the weasel genus. (Don’t you just love it when they crawl up your pant leg?)

• “International Children’s Book Day”, celebrated on the birthday of one of the most famous children’s authors, Hans Christian Andersen, born in Denmark on this day in 1805. He penned 168 fairytales in all, including “The Emperor’s New Clothes” and “The Little Mermaid”.

• “Peanut Butter & Jelly Day”, celebrating what may be the world’s most popular sandwich. But what else have you sandwiched with peanut butter? We like PB & tuna. Nummers!

• “Love Your Produce Manager Day”, a day to appreciate the person who orders and stocks fresh fruits and vegetables at groceries and supermarkets. So go ahead … squeeze his melons.

• “Reconciliation Day”, a day to write a letter or make a phone call in order to mend a broken relationship. (“Dear Boss: Sorry about that April Fool’s Day whoopee cushion …”)

• “World Autism Day”, a UN observance since 2007 to raise awareness that this disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication that’s estimated to affect 1-in-150 children worldwide.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1902 [112] The 1st ‘Motion Picture Theater’ opens in Los Angeles (The Electric Theatre charges a dime to see a 1-hour newsreel and the films “The Capture Of the Biddle Brothers” and “New York In a Blizzard”)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2006 [08] Gnarls Barkley’s “Crazy” becomes the 1st-ever single to top charts based solely on download sales

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1978 [36] ‘Velcro’ is introduced (inspired by the little hooks on burrs that attach to clothing)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1980 [34] Toshiaki Shirai & Yukiki Nagata of Tokyo, Japan set the world record for ‘Underwater Kissing’ (2 minutes, 18 seconds)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] “Captain America: The Winter Soldier” opens in movie theaters
[Thurs] Don’t Go to Work Unless It’s Fun Day
[Thurs] World Party Day
[Fri] “Island of Lemurs: Madagascar” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] NCAA March Madness Festival begins (Dallas TX)
[Fri] Walk to Work Day
This Week Is … Explore Your Career Options Week
This Month Is … International Guitar Month

BULL’S BITS

BS WAYS TO TICK OFF YOUR RESTAURANT SERVER:
✗ Showing up a minute before closing time.
✗ Name-dropping an owner or manager.
✗ Asking if lunch is still being served at 7 pm.
✗ Switching tables multiple times.
✗ Trying to haggle the price of menu items.
✗ Talking on the phone while the server is trying to take your order.
✗ Asking for copious amounts of complimentary items.
✗ Snapping fingers or whistling to get attention.
✗ Shaking a glass in the air to get a refill.
✗ Complaining or wanting a refund after finishing the entire meal.
✗ Splitting the bill 17 ways with 5 mismatched methods of payment.
✗ Freaking out at the server when your credit card gets declined.
✗ Tipping in coins.
✗ Slipping them your phone number.
– Adapted from BuzzFeed.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Should all vehicles be required to have backup cameras? The US National Highway Traffic Safety Administration is proposing that it becomes a regulation by 2018.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
The Mayan people of Central America and Mexico had a cacao god named Ek Chuah whom they honored with a festival each April. Along with the usual animal sacrifices, how did they celebrate the happy occasion?
a. By dancing naked on a mountain-top
b. By exchanging gifts. [CORRECT]
c. By bathing in hot chocolate.
– TriviaPark.com

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Did you know the person who invented the door knocker won the no-bell prize?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average person who does THIS, does it at 9:11 pm each night.
Answer: Puts on pajamas.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
You teach others how to treat you.