August 9, 2016

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Tuesday, August 9, 2016 – Edition: #5792

Good Morning, Sheetheads!

★ Rob Kardashian is going back in his shell … and his reality show is on the ropes. Production sources from his new reality show with fiancée Blac Chyna say Rob has been skipping filming over the last month, complaining that the show is compromising their relationship. As a result he’s been a no-show for various shoots, most notably a big Kardashian shindig in San Diego CA celebrating his grandmother’s birthday. Blac Chyna ended up filming solo. Rob is said to be hot & cold about the show depending on the week, and producers are concerned about getting enough good material so it doesn’t go the way of “I Am Cait”.
★ NBCUniversal is going deep on JK Rowling’s entertainment universe, nabbing TV and digital rights to the “Harry Potter” and “Fantastic Beasts” movies in a pact that also incorporates content for its Universal theme parks. The 8 “Harry Potter” pics become available to the company’s channels and digital platforms in 2018. The first “Fantastic Beasts” pic is set for release this November. The deal expands NBCU’s existing relationship with Rowling’s “Wizarding World” properties at its theme parks. “Harry Potter” installations at Universal parks in California, Florida, and Japan have been a huge boon to the theme parks’ business.
★ TV producer David E Kelley won 2 ‘Best Series’ Emmy Awards in 1999 for “Ally McBeal” and “The Practice” but has had a spottier track record of late. Perhaps his new, darker series for Amazon Prime called “Goliath” will turn things around. Billy Bob Thornton stars as a down-and-out lawyer fighting the injustice in the justice system. Co-stars include Dwight Yoakam, Maria Bello, and William Hurt. The 8-episode series arrives October 14th.
★ And VH1 is uniting two of the most unlikely partners at a dinner party for its newest unscripted show. The Viacom-owned cable network has gone straight to series on “Martha & Snoop’s Dinner Party”, a weekly series in which the Emmy-winning TV host and the pot aficionado rapper-producer throw a joint dinner party for celebrity friends … where nothing is off limits. The 10-episode series is set to debut in the Fall.

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Kaleo (“A/B”). Rerun.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Culture Club (“Colour by Numbers”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Band of Horses (“Why Are You OK”); ‘Carpool Karaoke’ with Lin-Manuel Miranda (“Hamilton”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Adia Victoria (“Beyond the Bloodhounds”). Rerun.
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Joe Jonas (DNCE).
• “Meredith Vieira” (syndicated) – Ciara (“Jackie”). Rerun.

• A Tribe Called Quest – “Billboard” reports NYC is naming a street after the late Phife Dawg, who passed away earlier this year. A portion of Linden Blvd at 192nd St in Queens is being renamed “Malik ‘Phife Dawg’ Taylor Way”. There is currently a Tribe mural on that block, where the video for “Check the Rhyme” was filmed.
• DJ Khaled – His new album “Major Key” debuts atop today’s new ‘Billboard 200’ chart, giving the producer/musician/social media star his first-ever #1 album, according to Nielsen Music. A physical release of “Major Key” is on the way this Friday.
• Justin Bieber – He and a gaggle of female friends have been living it up on Hawaii’s Big Island, where he’s reportedly rented a $10,000-per-night mansion perched atop 2 waterfalls.
• Lady Gaga – Producer/DJ Mark Ronson has revealed a bit more about her upcoming new album, expected in 2017. Quote: “I can’t wait until you can hear it because the music speaks for itself. Some of my favorite musicians of all-time are working on it.”
• Ozzy Osbourne – In a statement to “People”, he’s announced he is currently undergoing therapy. Quote: “Over the last 6 years, I have been dealing with a sex addiction.” Sharon Osbourne is apparently remaining as her husband’s manager despite his confession.
• Peter Tosh – One of the late reggae legend’s family members has sold him out, unloading his 1987 Grammy and an acoustic Martin guitar at a Somerville MA pawn shop for $4,000 and $2,000 respectively. The former Wailer did not have a will when shot and killed in 1987.

Coming out on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
• “The Get Down” ( NR Musical Drama ): The latest project from director Baz Luhrmann (“Moulin Rouge!”) is a drama series about a rag-tag group of teenagers running wild in the streets of the Bronx in the late 1970s. Stars Shameik Moore, Justice Smith, Herizen F Guardiola. The 12-episode Season 1 premieres Friday on Netflix.
• “A Hologram For the King” ( R-Rated Dramedy ): Tom Hanks plays a failed American businessman who looks to recoup losses by traveling to Saudi Arabia to sell an idea to a wealthy monarch. Co-stars Alexander Black, Sarita Choudhury, Ben Whishaw. The 2nd collaboration between Hanks and director Tom Tykwer, the first being “Cloud Atlas” (2012).
• Also being released: “11.22.63: The Complete Series” (TV); “The First Monday in May” (Documentary); “Frontline: The Secret History of ISIS” (Documentary); “Perry Mason: The Complete Movie Collection” (Compilation); “Supergirl: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); and “The Tunnel” (Brit TV).

The alcohol-free booze market has become big biz in Iran, Saudi Arabia, Egypt, and the United Arab Emirates where alcohol is forbidden. Consumption is particularly rising among young and fashionable Muslims in their desire to be a part of the glamorized image of free and frolicking revelers. The Middle East now accounts for nearly one-third of worldwide sales in non-alcoholic booze. But a shift to alcohol-free drinks is also being seen elsewhere, including a Chicago-area bar catering to recovering addicts, and a late-night lounge in Dublin, Ireland that’s committed to ‘making sober sexy’. (What’s the best non-alcohol beer? We like Grolsch.)
– “The Economist”

It was only 8 years ago? This is how you dressed in 2008 …
✗ Babydoll tops over short shorts.
✗ Short formal sack dresses.
✗ Black tights with everything.
✗ Tight tank tops over mini-skirts.
✗ ‘Pleather’ leggings.
✗ Fringed moccasin boots & fringed vests.
✗ High-waisted hot-pants.
✗ Tiered ruffle mini-dresses.
✗ Extra-wide waist belts.
✗ Boho headbands.
(Any or all of the above topped off with a vibrant orange spray tan.)
– Condensed from

HP is making a backpack that can recharge your full-size laptop. The new ‘Powerup Backpack’ may look like a standard knapsack, but it contains a massive 22,400mAh (amp-hour) battery. With that much juice you could recharge your smartphone 10 times. The canvas bag features ventilated pockets and heat sensor monitors and regulators to keep it from getting too hot. It meets regulations to be either checked in luggage or carry-on. Different countries, however, have different rules when it comes to high-capacity batteries, so it may raise some issues when flying overseas. The HP Powerup Backpack is being shipped October 1st but is now available for pre-order on Amazon at – whoa! – $200. (Or you could just put down your phone.)

We’ve all heard about having a one-night stand on vacation … you meet someone, bang it out, and go back to sipping mai tais on the beach the next day like nothing ever happened. While it sounds hot in theory, how many people actually do this? New research has found it’s probably more than you’d think. According to data just released from a survey of singles, 20% of people in their 20s and 30s have had a vacation one-night stand. And we’re apparently more likely to do it the older we get: 23% of single 30-somethings have had a tryst on vacation, while nearly 40% of singles in their 40s and 50s have done it. (So if you’re craving a little casual action on your next getaway, try seeking out someone 30 years older.)
– Sourced from “Glamour”

• Dogs are more likely to develop limp, hard-to-wag tails the further north they live.
– “Daily Telegraph”
• Cows moo in regional accents.
– “1,227 Quite Interesting Facts to Blow Your Socks Off”
• Ducks are never male. The males of the species are called drakes.


1968 [48] Eric Bana (Banadinović), Melbourne, Australia, movie actor (“Star Trek”, “Munich”) COMING UP: “King Arthur: Legend Of the Sword” (2017).

1968 [48] Sam Fogarino, Philadelphia PA, rock drummer (Interpol-“The Heinrich Maneuver”, “Slow Hands”)

1970 [46] Arion Salazar, Oakland CA, alt-rock musician (Third Eye Blind-“Jumper”, “Semi-Charmed Life”)

1976 [40] Jessica Capshaw, Columbia MO, TV actress (‘Dr Arizona Robbins’ on “Grey’s Anatomy” since 2009)

1976 [40] Audrey Tautou, Beaumont, France, movie actress (“The Da Vinci Code”, “Amélie”)

1985 [31] Anna Kendrick, Portland ME, movie actress (“Pitch Perfect” films, “The Twilight Saga”)

• “Book Lovers Day”. No matter where you are, you’re never alone … as long as you have a book. Is reading as good when using a Kindle or iPad?

• “Chinese Valentine Day” (aka “Daughters Festival”), celebrated on the 7th day of the 7th month of the lunar calendar. The observance evolved out of an ancient love story from Chinese folklore.

• “Hand-Holding Day”, set aside to celebrate one of the oldest expressions of reassurance and affection. Everybody has their preferred technique: Some like interlocking, others cupping or the pinky-link. Some prefer being on top, others the bottom … some swing both ways.

• “International Day of Indigenous People”, as declared by the UN. But is there really such a thing? Weren’t all people originally wanderers?

• “Rice Pudding Day”, celebrating the tasty treat that combines rice, milk, sugar, cinnamon, and raisins. And what’s your secret ingredient? Rum?

• “Worldwide Art Day”, an annual international celebration of artwork. It’s touted as the perfect starting point to help children gain an appreciation for the arts.

2002 [14] Elvis Presley’s daughter Lisa Marie weds actor Nicolas Cage (who played an Elvis-impersonator in 1992’s “Honeymoon in Vegas”), an ill-advised union that lasts 4 months

2015 [01] Former NFL star and long-time “Monday Night Football” sportscaster Frank Gifford dies at age 84 (husband of TV personality Kathie Lee Gifford)

1986 [30] An audience of 120,000 watches Queen play their last live concert with Freddie Mercury at the Knebworth Park Festival in Hertfordshire, England (encore includes “We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions” and “God Save the Queen”)

1955 [61] 1st “Guinness Book of World Records” is published (back when the record for hot dog eating was … 1)

[Wed] Skyscraper Appreciation Day
[Wed] S’mores Day
[Fri] “Florence Foster Jenkins”; “Pete’s Dragon”; “Sausage Party” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Shop Online For Groceries Day
[Fri] Vinyl Record Day
This Week Is … Farmers Market Week
This Month Is … Water Quality Month


Use ’em all at once or one-at-a-time as the zodiac reading of the day …
• Aries – Your tendency to see the worst in every situation will rob you of any pleasure you might have otherwise derived from Thursday’s biological-disease outbreak.
• Taurus – They’ve taken to calling you a broken man, defeated, beaten, dispirited, hopeless … but then, they have access to a thesaurus.
• Gemini – Continuing a proud, age-old tradition, you will hand down your family’s priceless heirlooms to the next generation of Chinatown pawnbrokers this week.
• Cancer – Endless complaints that your talents are being wasted at work will finally pay off when management decides to promote you to the new position of ‘Head Whiner’.
• Leo – There’s nothing wrong with being attracted to a man in uniform, but the stars still think you can do better than your apartment building custodian.
• Virgo – To no avail, today you will once again pray exactly 223 times for the healing of your lifelong obsessive-compulsive disorder.
• Libra – A scantily clad stripper will soon jump out of the cake, confirming a rather embarrassing mix-up at the bakery … and completely ruining your daughter’s 4th birthday.
• Scorpio – Newton’s Law says that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, proving he knew nothing about women.
• Sagittarius – Every day, in every way, you’re getting better and better. But at this rate you won’t be much good for 64 more years.
• Capricorn – It’s all over but the shouting, but don’t worry … it’s going to be great shouting.
• Aquarius – The broken ribs, fractured skull, and dislocated shoulder won’t hurt at all, mostly because you’ll suffer them after being dropped by drunken pallbearers.
• Pisces – The stars foresee travel in your future, so get ready to finally put on a pair of decent pants.
– Adapted from

I think something died inside my brain. This morning my eyelids will only go to half-mast.

• What are people who chase after rare birds called?
a. Birders.
b. Twitchers. [CORRECT]
c. Rare Bird Chasers.

• What is the fleshy projection above the bill on a turkey called?
a. A snood. [CORRECT]
b. A wattle.
c. A skinpouch.

☎ Some male gymnasts want to compete shirtless at the Olympics. Should it be allowed?

Question: 50 years ago men did THIS almost exclusively; nowadays women do it 3 times more than men.
Answer: Take pictures.

Just because it pays well doesn’t mean it’s a good job.

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