Thursday, August 9, 2018 – Edition: #6273

Good Morning, Sheetheads!

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
“The Bull Sheet” will be off for a one-week summer vacation and will not be publishing Monday August 13 through Friday August 17. All subscribers will receive credit for missed service days. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Monday August 20.

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The West Hollywood City Council has passed a resolution to remove President Donald Trump’s Hollywood Walk of Fame star, according to the city’s mayor. Trump’s star has taken beating after beating since he began his run for president. On July 25, a man wielding a pickaxe turned the star into rubble. It was similarly destroyed with a pickaxe just before the 2016 election. That incident followed multiple others in which individuals built a wall around the star and spray painted a swastika on it. Last year, the star was vandalized with stickers, including ones that read “#IResist.”  In spite of the resolution, the president of the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce says the star is unlikely to be removed.
-MSN
★ Matthew Perry has undergone surgery to deal with a serious health scare stemming from his digestive tract. Perry’s reps confirmed that the “Friends” star recently had surgery in an L.A. hospital to repair a gastrointestinal perforation, which is essentially a hole that forms typically in the stomach, large bowel or small intestine. It can be triggered by anything from appendicitis or diverticulitis to a knife or gunshot wound. Medical sites say it needs to be immediately treated or it can be life-threatening.
-TMZ
★ They may have been there for each other, but the “Friends” cast doesn’t seem to have been there for Kathleen Turner. In an interview with Vulture, Turner reflected on her guest appearances on Friends, and admitted that she never warmed up to the cast members. Turner said, “The Friends actors were such a clique — but I don’t think my experience with them was unique. I think it was simply that they were such a tight little group that nobody from the outside mattered.”
-MSN
★ Jennifer Garner and her daughter Violet had quite the adventure in Sweden. The actress and her 12-year-old had to be rescued from a shipping lane in Stockholm after getting lost on a kayak trip. On Monday, Garner posted a photo and wrote: “On a pre-middle-school sneak away with my eldest. Did I get us lost in a kayak? Yes. Did we paddle as hard as we could for 100 hours and end up in a shipping lane? I’m afraid so. Did we have to be rescued? Yup.”
-MSN
★ “Homeland” will end after Season 8 has aired, Showtime has confirmed. The Emmy Award winning CIA drama series, which stars Claire Danes and Mandy Patinkin, will conclude next year because the ”game changing’ program has run its course”. Danes had previously stated that the eighth season would be the last.
-ContactMusic

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Bob Newhart, Awkwafina, Blood Orange featuring A$AP Rocky
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Rose Byrne, Brad Paisley
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Issa Rae, Darren Criss, Ronnie Chieng
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kelsey Grammar, Rainn Wilson, Franz Ferdinand, Joey Castillo
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Tig Notaro, John Cho, Flora Cash
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Lisa Kudrow, Tom Papa, Jukebox the Ghost ( R )
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Golnesa Gharachedaghi, Mike Shouhed
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson, Ida Keeling ( R )
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jeff Goldblum, Sean Valentine ( R )
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Kelsey Grammar, Ruby Rose, Dr. Wendy Bazilian, guest co-host Maria Menounos
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Bono, The Edge, Diane Keaton ( R )
• “The Gong Show” (ABC): Celebrity judges Chris Sullivan, Natasha Leggero, Mark Cuban praise, critique and gong unusually talented and unique performers.
• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC): A recap of the competition leading up to the live episodes.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Lady Gaga – is headed for Vegas. Her Las Vegas residency will kick off December 28 at Park Theater at the new Park MGM resort. It runs through November 8, 2019 with 28 dates in total at this point.
• Avicii – It looks like a collaboration with Coldplay’s Chris Martin will be released posthumously along with a bunch of other tracks the late DJ left behind. His long-time collaborator, Carl Falk, is putting final touches on a number of songs for future release.
• Ariana Grande – James Corden is teasing that she will appear on “Carpool Karaoke”. Corden posted the lyrics to her hits, ‘No Tears Left to Cry’ and ‘God is a Woman’, on his Twitter account on Tuesday , suggesting Grande will be his next guest.
• The Weeknd – will appear at the 2018 Global Citizen Festival. The event will take place on Sept. 29 on the Great Lawn in New York City’s Central Park. John Legend, Janet Jackson, Shawn Mendes, Monae and Cardi B will also perform. Hugh Jackman and Deborra-lee Furness will host the festival, which calls on world leaders to achieve the United Nations’ sustainable development goals and end extreme poverty by 2030.
• Stevie Nicks – will return to TV for “American Horror Story: Apocalypse”. She appeared as the White Witch in the show’s 2014 series, “Coven”. The new season debuts Sept. 12.
• KISS – In what local officials are calling a “cultural atrocity,” an unknown vandal has painted Kiss makeup on a statue at a cathedral in Spain. The 12th century statue was defaced with a crude blue version of the “Catman” makeup worn by both Kiss co-founder Peter Criss and current drummer, Eric Singer. Lasers will have to be used to remove the paint without damaging the statue.
• AC/DC – Rumors abound that they are recording new material. A fan claims to have spotted and spoken with both guitarist Stevie Young and drummer Phil Rudd in Vancouver, where the band recorded their last three albums. And now ‘former’ singer Brian Johnson has turned up in a photograph with Rudd.
• Keith Urban – A woman who came to his ‘rescue’ when he was short on cash at a convenience store is now laughing at what an “idiot” she was after realizing the stranger she helped was actually Urban. Ruth Reed thought she was helping a down-and-out man pay for his food in New Jersey. During their conversation, she told him that he looked like Keith Urban. When he said he actually was, at first she didn’t believe him, asking the person with him — who was Urban’s bodyguard — to confirm it. (Guess the bodyguard was broke too?)
• Ronnie Dunn – will be inducted into the Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame this year. Also receiving class of 2018 honors at the Oct. 28 ceremony: K.T. Oslin, Byron Hill, Wayne Kirkpatrick and Joe Melson.

NUTJOB:
If you love Nutella, (and really, who doesn’t?) the maker of the famous Italian chocolate and hazelnut spread has a job for you. Maybe. Ferro, makers of Nutella, is looking for 60 non-professional “sensory judges” who will be paid for tasting its products. Successful candidates will undergo three months of rigorous taste-bud training at Ferro headquarters. But there is a catch.
You have to be ready, able and willing to relocate to Alba in Italy’s northwest Piedmont region. That’s the area famed for its white truffles, not to mention many fine wines.
(All interested applicants are asked to form a double line….behind me!)
(I’m not sure I could eat Nutella on a full-time basis. What would I do at lunch?)
(I love that stuff so much I’d drink it thru a straw if I could…still find a straw!)
-USAToday, ABC

FIVE OUT OF FIVE DENTISTS AGREE:
Some dental professionals are concerned with the rise in popularity of floride-free toothpaste. The internet has given rise to dozens of so-called “natural” toothpaste marketers who claim that fluoride-free toothpaste prevents cavities just as capably as your traditional Crest or Colgate. Dental authorities disagree. That view was underscored by an recent article in the dental journal Gerodontology. Its primary conclusion is that oral hygiene efforts such as brushing with non-floride toothpaste or with just water have “no impact” on cavity rates. Some dentists say the best combination for the health of your teeth is to live in an area that floridates the water supply, and to brush your teeth regularly with floride toothpaste. Oh, and to reduce sugar in your diet.
(Other efforts have no impact? Well, at least I’m off the hook for flossing…)
(Did they say anything about when you forget your toothbrush and you use your finger?)
(More cavities? I need that like a hole in the head!)
-AP

MOUNT PUSHMORE:
Here’s something you might not have ever worried about before: With the thousands of people who attempt to climb Mount Everest each year, what becomes of all that human waste? To help preserve the environment there, this season, porters working on Everest schlepped 28,000 pounds of human waste — the equivalent of two fully-grown elephants — from base camp down to a sanitary site. That’s a lot of….well, you know. At Gorek Shep, a frozen lakebed 17,000 feet above sea level, waste matter is deposited into open pits where it shrivels and dehydrates. But there is a risk that it will leak into a river and contaminate the water supply system. That’s why the Mount Everest Biogas Project was formed to try get overcome this “environmental hazard.” The plan is to install a biogas digester near the lake bed to convert human waste into methane gas. The first digester will cost around $500,000, mostly because of the transportation cost to lug the materials up 17,000 feet to Gorak Shep.
(I never thought that there was a way for an avalanche to get worse…)
(I know a guy who can make methane gas a lot cheaper than that!)
(***Caution***So, some dudes’ jobs are to haul human waste down a mountain? That’s like being paid to take a dump!)
-CNN

HOW TO MAKE A SUNBURN HURT LESS:
➣ Medication: If your skin feels like it’s burning, aspirin can help because of its anti-inflammatory properties. You can take it orally or crush it up and make a paste to rub right on your skin. (Betcha didn’t know THAT!)
➣ Ointments: Be sure you use ointments and not creams because ointments, while they are a little bit thicker and messier, prevent a chilly sensation and they work much better. Apply as soon as possible. (If you can stand it!) You can also try olive or coconut oil or aloe vera.
➣ Cool down: Use cool or lukewarm water, and pat your skin dry. Avoid ice, which can irritate your skin further. (Trust me, you want to have a bath, NOT a shower!)
➣ Leave blisters alone: Resist the urge to scratch irritated skin, or to pop blisters. You don’t need a skin infection too. Try cortisone cream if you are very itchy.
➣ See a doctor? Get assistance if you have multiple small blisters or one large one. Seek immediate help if you show signs of sun poisoning such as a fever over 101 degrees, chills, nausea, dizziness or if your sunburn is actually getting worse after the first 12 hours. (This sounds like most of my 20s….)
(I did not think I could get through that without suggesting you can make a sunburn hurt less by drinking. Whoops.)
(I’m the type who gets burned walking into the store to buy sunscreen…)
-HuffingtonPost

BS CHRONOMETER 08.09.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944 [74] Sam Elliot, Sacramento, CA, movie actor (“Tombstone”, “Mask”, “Roadhouse”) COMING UP…“A Star Is Born”, 2018

1957 [61] Melanie Griffith, New York City NY, movie actress (“Working Girl’, “Body Double”)

1964 [54] Hoda Kotb, Norman OK, TV show host (“Today” since 2007, “Dateline NBC” since 1998)

1968 [50] Gillian Anderson, Chicago, IL, TV actress (‘Dana Scully’ on “The X-Files”
1993-2018, ‘Stella Gibson’ on “The Fall” 2013-2016) COMING UP…”The Sunlit Night” 2019

1968 [50] Eric Bana (Banadinović), Melbourne, Australia, movie actor (“Hulk”, “Munich”)

1976 [42] Jessica Capshaw, Columbia MO, TV actress (‘Dr Arizona Robbins’ on “Grey’s Anatomy” since 2009)

1985 [33] Anna Kendrick, Portland ME, movie actress (“Pitch Perfect” films, “The Twilight Saga”) COMING UP…”A Simple Favor” 2018

1990 [28] Bill Skarsgard, Vallingby Sweden, movie actor (“It”, “Deadpool 2″) COMING UP…”Villians” 2019

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Book Lovers Day”. No matter where you are, you’re never alone … as long as you have a book. Is reading as good when using a Kindle or iPad?

• “Hand-Holding Day”, set aside to celebrate one of the oldest expressions of reassurance and affection. Everybody has their preferred technique: Some like interlocking, others cupping or the pinky-link. Some prefer being on top, others the bottom … some swing both ways.

• “International Day of Indigenous People”, as declared by the UN. There are an estimated 370 million indigenous people in the world, living across 90 countries. The 2018 theme is “Indigenous peoples’ migration and movement.”

• “Rice Pudding Day”, celebrating the tasty treat that combines rice, milk, sugar, cinnamon, and raisins. And what’s your secret ingredient? Rum?

• “Polka Day”, celebrating the fast-paced duet dance form is said to have originated in the 1800s in Bohemia. (Really, it is possible to be sad when a polka is being played??)

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Lazy Day
[Fri] Kool-Aid Day
[Sat] Bowling Day
[Sat] Garage Sale Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2002 [16] Elvis Presley’s daughter Lisa Marie weds actor Nicolas Cage (who played an Elvis-impersonator in 1992 s “Honeymoon in Vegas”), an ill-advised union that lasts 4 months

2015 [03] Former NFL star and long-time “Monday Night Football” sportscaster Frank Gifford dies at age 84 (husband of TV personality Kathie Lee Gifford)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1986 [32] An audience of 120,000 watches Queen play their last live concert with Freddie Mercury at the Knebworth Park Festival in Hertfordshire, England (encore includes ‘We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions’ and ‘God Save the Queen’)
1995 [23] Jerry Garcia of the Grateful Dead dies from a heart attack at age 53.

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1955 [63] 1st “Guinness Book of World Records” is published (back when the record for hot dog eating was … 1) **BS FUN FACT**: The Guinness Book of World Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from libraries.

2012 [06] Usain Bolt becomes the first person to win gold in the 100m and 200m events in back to back Olympics.

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ Sound travels 15 times faster through steel than air.
✓ Sunlight can penetrate clean ocean water up to a depth of 73m (240 feet).
✓ Ostriches have a 14 meter (46 foot) long small intestine.
✓ Dolphins can hear underwater sounds from 24km (15miles) away.
✓ Sharks can sense a drop of blood from 4km (2.5miles) away.
✓ You can smell a skunk 1.6km (1 mile) away.
-DidYouKnow

BS RUIN A PICNIC WITH ONE QUESTION:
• Has anyone seen my fingernail?
• Why is the rice crawling?
• Do you have any gluten free, low salt, no carb snacks? I’m doing a cleanse.
• So, who’s watched the Human Centipede trilogy?
• Who’s up for tripe?
• Who the hell invited her?
• Would you like to hear my definitive ranking of every family member at this reunion in order of hotness?
• Does this meat smell OK to you?
• Who put the bait next to the noodles?
• Do we really have to do this outside?
-Twitter

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Forget dancing like no one is watching. Dance like a toddler. They don’t even care if there’s music!

PHONE STARTER:
What offensive thing does your co-worker do while on the job?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: According to a survey, this is the #1 phrase a woman does not want to hear…
Answer: “You look tired.”

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it.