February 16, 2010

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Tuesday, February 16, 2010        Edition: #4199
Ahhh, It’s Your Daily Constitutional Sheet!


Heavyweight filmmaker Kevin Smith (“Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back”) is fuming after being tossed off a Southwest Airlines flight because he was a ‘safety risk’ (regulations require plus-size passengers to be able to lower both armrests – or pre-book an extra seat) . . . Live Nation Entertainment has entered into an agreement to offer tickets through Walmart at some 500 of its stores over the coming months . . . Brittany Murphy Foundation officials have agreed to hand back all donations after reporters discovered that the organization set up following her death in December is NOT registered as an official charity (her hubby Simon Monjack is quickly becoming a contender for ‘Shyster Of the Year’) . . . 64-year-old actress Goldie Hawn wants to set up a Buddhist school in the UK that encourages pupils to make social and emotional progress through the technique of ‘Mindfulness Training’ (Brit kids wanna know – will there be homework?) . . . Filmmaker Quentin Tarantino says he wants to tackle ‘gunslingers and slavery’ in his next film, a ‘spaghetti Western’ set in the Old West (blood will ensue) . . . Actress-serial mom Angelina Jolie is urging prospective parents NOT to adopt Haitian orphans because she fears it could lead to an increase in child trafficking . . . Famous person Lindsay Lohan is auctioning off a night in her company as part of a fundraiser in London to benefit Haiti relief (is this the booby prize?) . . . Simon Cowell’s “Helping Haiti” single has hit #1 in the UK after selling 450,000 copies in its first week of release . . . And according to a “People” magazine source, Michael Jackson’s kids, now living with his mother Katherine in California, are living a much more ‘normal’ life than they ever did with their father, thrilled for instance to be able to go outside without wearing masks (any hope of these 3 turning out ‘normal’ dissipated years ago).

• “American Idol” (FOX/CTV) – Part 3 of the Hollywood round.
• “BRIT Awards 2010” (ITV) – Comedian Peter Kay hosts the 30th annual UK music awards from London’s Earls Court Exhibition Centre. Lily Allen and Florence & The Machine lead nominations with 3 apiece. Performers include Jay-Z, Kasabian, Lady Gaga, and Robbie Williams, who also receives the ‘Outstanding Contribution to Music’ career achievement award.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Kellie Pickler (“Didn’t You Know How Much I Loved You”); Sade (“Soldier of Love”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Sade (“Soldier of Love”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Mary J Blige (“Stronger With Each Tear”).


• Carrie Underwood – She’s making her movie acting debut in “Soul Surfer”, a drama about a teenage surfer girl (played by AnnaSophia Robb) who summons the courage to go back into the ocean after losing an arm in a shark attack. The film’s shooting in Hawaii for a 2011 release.
• Celine Dion – Her new movie, “Celine: Through the Eyes Of the World”, highlights performances during her recent world tour and gives glimpses of her offstage life. It premieres tonight in Miami FL, then opens tomorrow in select cinemas for a limited engagement.
• Dolly Parton – The 64-year-old country legend is writing her own biopic, which tracks the story of how she rose from a poor girl in the Tennessee mountains to one of the biggest-selling country singers in history. She earlier hinted she’d like Scarlett Johansson to play her.
• John Mayer – Vivid Entertainment has written him to offer his ‘dream job’ of appearing in an adult film, referring to another ill-advised blurt-out in his infamous recent “Playboy” interview.
• Lady Antebellum – This morning the “Need You Now” hit-makers perform in Vancouver as part of “Today” show coverage of the Winter Olympics on NBC-TV.
• Madonna – She’s returning to the director’s chair to helm her 2nd film, a drama based on the life of Britain’s King Edward VIII. Her first movie was 2008’s little-seen “Filth & Wisdom”.
• Nickelback – A new Facebook page called “Can this pickle get more fans than Nickleback?” already has more than 960,000 fans. Nickelback currently has about 1.4 million Facebook fans.
• Plastic Ono Band – Tonight at NYC’s Brooklyn Academy of Music, Yoko Ono has recruited Bette Midler, Eric Clapton, Mark Ronson, Martha Wainwright, Paul Simon, Scissor Sisters, Sean Lennon and others to take part in the first ‘Plastic Ono Band’ show in 40 years.
• Rihanna – She’s reportedly landed a raunchy role as a dominatrix in an upcoming remake of the 1985 kung-fu cult film, “The Last Dragon”. Samuel L Jackson is slated to star.


• “Coco Before Chanel” ( Biographical Drama ): Audrey Tautou (“Da Vinci Code”) stars in the story of legendary French designer Gabrielle ‘Coco’ Chanel (1883-1971) and her rise from obscure beginnings to the heights of the fashion world. Shot in Paris, France.
• “Law Abiding Citizen” ( Psychological Thriller ): Gerard Butler plays an everyday guy who decides to take justice into his own hands after a plea bargain sets his family’s killers free. His target: The district attorney who orchestrated the deal (Jamie Foxx). Shot in Philadelphia PA.
• Also released today: “Barnaby Jones: The 1st Season” (Vintage TV); “Clint Eastwood: 35 Films 35 Years” (Compilation); “Good Hair” (Documentary); “Small Wonder: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); and “The Spectacular Spider-Man: Volumes 6 & 7” (Animation).


Vegetarian diets based around meat substitutes like tofu may not be environmentally friendly, according to new research. The Cranfield University study, commissioned by the World Wildlife Fund, finds that meat substitutes are often highly processed, requiring large amounts of energy to produce. And many – such as soy, chickpeas, and lentils – can be harmful to the environment because they are imported. Bottom line: The amount of foreign land required to produce substitute products – and the destruction of forests to make way for that farmland – may actually outweigh the negatives of raising livestock domestically. (Is tofu even a food?)
– Telegraph.co.uk

Spitting these out won’t necessarily be easy, but doing so can help trigger changes that ultimately lead to healthier relationships. Here then are 4 things you haven’t said … but should.
• “You need to lose weight.”
• “Your boyfriend is cheating on you.”
• “I deserve a raise.”
• “It’s time to get your ass off the couch and look for a job!”
(Ask listeners for other tough statements that need airing.)
– Condensed from “Cosmopolitan”


Behavioral experts have found that infants begin to ‘lie’ to parents as early as 6-months-old. It seems simple fibs help to train them for more complex deceptions in later life. Psychologist Vasudevi Reddy at the UK’s University of Portsmouth has identified 7 categories of deception used between 6 months and 3 years of age. Fake crying is one of the earliest forms. She says infants use it to get attention even though nothing is wrong. How to spot it? The baby will pause in between sobs to hear if mom or dad is responding. (Then there’s the old diaper false alarm.)
– “Globe & Mail”

• Luge means ‘sled’ in French.
• Figure skating became an Olympic sport in 1908 at the SUMMER Olympics in London.
• The Swiss originally invented the sport of bobsleigh by joining 2 sleds together and attaching a steering device.
• Skiing didn’t make its Olympic debut until the 4th Winter games at Garmisch-Partenkirchen in 1936.
– Condensed from “Readers’ Digest”


It’s hard to decide what’s the best news Haitians have received in the past week or two. Could it be that both Harrison Ford and Angelina Jolie have visited? Or that Lindsay Lohan is selling leggings to raise money for them? Or perhaps that Harley-Davidson has donated 28 motorcycles to the country? (Because when 230,000 of your compatriots have died and almost all the roads are blocked, riding your own hog must really seem like a dream come true!)
– PopBitch.com


A new fad in Britain called ‘Hate Dating’ is similar to ‘Speed Dating’ except instead of selling yourself in brief encounters with potential mates, you argue and hurl abuse at each other, as well as reveal your hatred of seemingly minor things. What’s the point? Proponents claim that handling conflict is a key to lasting relationships – you have to be compatible in the way you argue or a relationship simply won’t last. Participants also say ‘hate dating’ serves to quickly break the ice. (This sounds like a great radio bit using candidates on the phone!)
– Guardian.co.uk


‘Barbie’ doll has been everything from a supermodel to a teacher, nurse, and many other careers that have often perpetuated a sexist stereotype about what type of work a woman can do. Departing from this trend, Mattel invited people to vote on her next career from a number of choices, some of which are very academically challenging. The result is that the newest ‘Barbie’ will be … a computer engineer. (“That new girl in IT is a real doll!”)
– “New York Times”


Jeff Ondash of Cranfield, Ohio has set a new Guinness World Record by giving 7,777 hugs in a 24-hour period on “Valentines Day” in front of the Paris Las Vegas Hotel-Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. The previous record of 5,000 hugs in a single day was set last year by Siobhan O’Connor in Dublin, Ireland.
– AP


• Parents in Japan give KitKat bars to their youngsters when they are taking exams. The phrase ‘Kitto Katsu’ translates as ‘you will surely win’. So the chocolate is given as a good-luck gift.
• In Japan, a bow’s humility is determined by its deepness and duration.
– BBC News


1958 [52] Ice T (Tracy Morrow), Newark NJ, TV actor (‘Detective Fin Tutuola’ on “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” since 2000)/former rapper (“Cop Killer”)

1959 [51] John McEnroe, Wiesbaden Air Force Base, Germany, TV tennis analyst/Hall of Fame player ranked #1 during the 1980s

1961 [49] Andy Taylor, Newcastle UK, classic rock guitarist (Duran Duran-“Hungry Like the Wolf”, “The Reflex”)

1965 [45] Dave Lombardo, Havana, Cuba, metal rock drummer (Slayer-“Eyes Of the Insane”, “Dittohead”)

1977 [33] Brad Walst, Norwood ON, rock bassist/vocalist (Three Days Grace-“Break”, “Just Like You”)


• “Do a Grouch a Favor Day”, a day to perform an unexpected good deed to cheer up someone who’s sulky.

• “Mardi Gras”/”Fat Tuesday”/”Shrove Tuesday”/”Pancake Day”/”Carnaval”, always 46 days before Easter and traditionally the final chance to indulge before the austerity of Lent. In Latin, ‘carne vale’ means ‘farewell to meat’. The day is marked by masked balls, lavish costumes, floats, parades, torchlight processions, dancing, fireworks, and feasting on all sorts of foods. Some of the biggest celebrations are in New Orleans, Louisiana; Rio de Janeiro, Brazil; and Nice, France. Many of the traditions date to the 14th century.

• “Olney Pancake Race”, when the women of Olney, England run a 415-yard course while carrying a pan of pancakes. The tradition goes back more than 500 years.
NET: http://www.olneytowncouncil.co.uk/pancake.php
For the past 60 years, a mirror event has been staged in Liberal, Kansas in which the town women compete against those in Olney UK for best time in the “International Pancake Race”.
NET: http://www.pancakeday.net

1990 [20] 1st issue of “Entertainment Weekly” magazine (singer kd lang on the cover)

2007 [03] Britney Spears shaves her own head after an LA salon owner refuses to do it for her


1994 [16] Apple introduces 1st ‘Digital Camera’ that allows uploads to computer

2005 [05] National Hockey League cancels the entire regular season and playoffs, becoming the 1st major sports league in North America to do so over a labor dispute

1980 [30] ‘World’s Longest Traffic Jam’ extends 180 km (109 mi) from Paris to Lyons, France

[Wed] Ash Wednesday
[Wed] PTA Founders Day
[Wed] World Human Spirit Day
[Thurs] Introduce a Girl to Engineering Day
[Fri] “Shutter Island” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] Chocolate Mint Day
This Week Is … International Friendship Week
This Month Is … Care About Your Indoor Air Month


Getting girls to flash in exchange for a string of beads has become a Mardi Gras tradition in New Orleans. A few BS less successful encouragements …
• “Show me your bra, as long as it’s somewhat modest!”
• “Flash me in such an oblique way that I can still post the pics on Facebook!”
• “Show me half your areola!”
• “Do something adorable with a kitten!”
• “Show me your appendectomy scar!”
• “Adjust your pants slightly!”
• “Show me your neck wattles!”
• “Thank-you for your drunken generosity!”
• “Take off your wimple!”
• “Have sex with me please.”
– Thanks to David Ellis Dickerson

I absolutely refuse to be assertive!

• The price of syrup has doubled.
• Whenever you shake hands with someone, your palms stick.
• There’s some strange-lookin’ Frisbees in the schoolyard this morning.
• Aunt Jemima has just made “Fortune” magazine’s top 10.
• It’s the only day of the year you hear anyone actually use the word ‘shrove’.

The odd combination sports ‘Biathlon’ (cross country skiing & target shooting) and ‘Nordic Combined’ (cross country skiing & ski jumping) have been completed at the Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics. What other sports would make interesting combos? (Sled dog racing & slalom? Figure skating & ice fishing? Ski jumping & skeet shooting?)


Today’s Question: Studies show that cold weather brings an increase in THIS.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Nightmares.

If you think you have no faults, that makes one.

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