Monday, February 27, 2017 – Edition: #5920

Bully For You!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The winners (or losers, perhaps) of the 37th “Golden Raspberry Awards”, also known as the “Razzies”, were announced Saturday night. “Hillary’s America: The Secret History Of the Democratic Party” has been named ‘Worst Picture’. It tied with the $250-million comic book mess “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” with 4 citations overall.
– CNN Entertainment
★ He lost his bid to be US president and likely any role in the Trump administration. So what’s next for Chris Christie? One report suggests that sports talk radio looks like a real possibility. The idea is he’d replace the outgoing Mike Francesco at NYC’s WFAN 660, who leaves at the end of this year about the same time that Christie’s term as New Jersey governor is up. Christie has already been a guest co-host on the show several times.
– “New York Post”
★ And not surprisingly Donald Trump has announced (via Twitter, of course) that he’s not attending the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner this year. The late April event is put together by an organization of journalists who cover the White House. The gala event is usually hosted by a comedian who has some fun at the serving president’s expense, however, a host for this year’s ceremony had not yet been announced.
– TMZ.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – ‘Mash-up Monday’ features Lady AnteBell Biv DeVoe (a mash-up of Lady Antebellum and Bell Biv DeVoe).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Caspian (“Dust & Disquiet”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/CTV) – Linkin Park f/Kiiara (“Heavy”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Regina Spektor (“Remember Us to Life”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Singer-songwriter Lori McKenna (“The Bird & The Rifle”).
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – DJ Khaled f/Flo Rida (“Go Ahead”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – 2 Chainz f/Gucci Mane (“Good Drank”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV) – Season 12 debut. Gwen Stefani rejoins the coaching panel alongside her boo Blake Shelton, Alicia Keys, and Adam Levine.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Beyoncé – Queen Bey, who’s pregnant with twins, has pulled out of headlining the Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival under doctor’s orders. At this point it’s unclear who is taking over her slots on April 15th and 22nd. Radiohead and Kendrick Lamar are the other headliners.
• Chris Stapleton – He’s releasing his 2nd album on May 5th, exactly 2 years to the day since his mega-successful “Traveller” debut. Stapleton has also announced the “Chris Stapleton’s All-American Road Show” tour, starting in mid-March and concluding in late August.
• Foo Fighters – They’ve announced a Glastonbury headline slot for the second time in as many years. They had to bow out of 2015’s festival when frontman Dave Grohl broke his leg while on tour. They’ll take to the Pyramid Stage at the big UK festival on Saturday, June 24th.
• Gucci Mane – He’s announced his first-ever headline tour. The trek begins in Boston MA on April 5th with dates announced up to May 6th in Austin TX, though additional dates will be announced soon.
• Katy Perry – She says she’s taking her time with her new album rollout. She’s planning on releasing several more singles before the full recording arrives.
• Lionel Richie / Mariah Carey – Their joint “All the Hits Tour” has been postponed, as Richie is currently recovering from a knee procedure and will be unable to hit the road. The tour had been slated to start March 15th but will now take place this Summer.
• Little Big Town – “Better Man” is at the top of the ‘Billboard Country Airplay Chart’, taking 18 weeks to make the journey. The song was penned by Taylor Swift.
• Lorde – With a new single expected in the coming weeks, she’s been announced as musical guest on NBC-TV’s “Saturday Night Live” on March 11th, with Scarlett Johansson hosting.

NICE PERK:
A Swedish politician is recommending that employees should be paid to … go home and have sex. The municipal council member argues that couples aren’t spending enough time together and that a 1-hour ‘sex break’ per week would improve relationships. The counselor claims that replacing a 1-hour weekly break already designated for physical fitness with one specifically for sex would also increase feelings of well-being, stimulate the local birth rate, and boost morale. A sociology professor adds that it might also boost productivity. The idea may not be so far-fetched – the Swedes have already experimented with 6-hour workdays, and enjoy multiple coffee breaks per day, in addition to 480 days of parental leave. (Don’t need this over here … we already get screwed at work.)
– “New York Times”

HALFWAY HOUSE:
For young city-dwellers who cant afford or don’t want to live alone, a new solution has emerged … ‘co-living’, a trend that harks back to the days of boarding houses. Rapidly rising property prices in big cities are pushing the cost of living sky-high for renters. In response, the new trend for co-living is catching on. Call it dorm living for adults – people pay for a room (or part of a room) in an apartment with strangers – and share common spaces like living rooms and kitchens. But co-living usually offers more than just accommodations. These are professionally planned communities where entire buildings are being renovated to include amenities like movie screening rooms and yoga studios, and they offer extras like Internet – and, in some cases, unlimited beer – as part of the monthly rent. (It’s College, Chapter 2.)
– BBC Capital

DISINGENUOUS THINGS PEOPLE SAY EVERY DAY:
• “Call me if you need anything.”
• “It’s not you, it’s me.”
• “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”
• “I don’t care what other people think.”
• “I have read and agreed to the terms of service.”
• “Your call is very important to us …”
• “We should meet up sometime.”
• “Till death do us part.”
• “LOL”
• “I’m fine, thank-you.”
– Adapted from List25.com

EAT YOUR CARROTS:
An Imperial College London study has found that doubling the current recommendation of 5-a-day fruits and vegetables to 10 servings a day could stave off 7.8 million early deaths annually if people followed the new formula. The study also pinpoints specific fruits and veggies that may help prevent heart disease and stroke (including apples, citrus fruits, and the cruciferous family of broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage); and cancer (spinach, peppers, and carrots, among others). Researchers have found that upping fruit and veggie intake to about 28 oz day (a 10-serving equivalent) is tied to a 24% reduced risk of heart disease, a 13% decreased risk of all cancers, and a 31% slashing of premature death. (Can you even name 10 different fruits and vegetables?)
– “The Guardian”

RED WINE = GREAT SEX:
Red wine increases sexual arousal in both men and women. Yes, the same stuff that can prevent us from becoming obese, lowers the risk of diabetes, prevents memory loss, helps battle depression, and is good for our hearts, we now find out also turns us on. We have a group of Italian researchers to thank for kick-starting research into red wine and sex. Without getting too bogged down in the science of why, red wine actually has compounds that stimulate our erogenous zones. Drinking 2 glasses-a-day gives women a higher sex drive, and in men, seems to increase testosterone in the blood. Let’s not get carried away though, this only applies to the first couple of glasses. It goes swiftly downhill from there. (So, which are the best wines for the job?)
– Metro.co.uk

MY HUMPS:
A hot new women’s fashion trend in Asia is apparently … camel toe underwear. That’s right, underwear that looks like your pants are a little too tight and hugging your privates a little too close. It’s like a push-up bra, below the waist. Basically, we’re talking about normal (if not slightly gross-looking) underpants with pads sewn into the front. They apparently come in a range of colors to match skin tones … as if you’ll be passing them off as the real-deal or something. A quick search of the net suggests this is probably a fetish thing that’s crossed into at least part of the mainstream. (This kind of ‘shapewear’ for guys didn’t succeed too well. About as effective as a folded up sock.)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/h6348e3
– Reddit.com

DID YOU KNOW?
• Scientists have recently discovered a frog so small it could sit on your thumbnail.
• Female fish mate about 200 times but only save eggs for the perfect male
– “The New Scientist”

BS CHRONOMETER 02.27.17

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1971 [46] Rozonda ‘Chilli’ Thomas, Atlanta GA, oldies singer (TLC-“Unpretty”, “No Scrubs”)

1980 [37] Chelsea Clinton, Little Rock AK, Clinton Foundation board member/daughter of Bill & Hillary Clinon

1981 [36] Josh Groban, LA CA, pop singer/operatic baritone (“Brave”, “You Raise Me Up”)

1983 [34] Jared Champion, Bowling Green KY, rock drummer (Cage The Elephant-“Shake Me Down”, “Back Against the Wall”)

1983 [34] Kate Mara, Bedford NY, movie actress (“The Martian”)/TV actress (“House of Cards” 2013-16)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Anosmia Awareness Day” [an-OHZ-me-uh], a day to spread awareness about the loss of the sense of smell.

• “Cupcake Day”, saluting those fabulous little cakes that don’t count as cheating on your diet ’cause they’re just small … right? In Canada, the day is a fundraiser in which people are asked to ‘bake a difference’ to support animal shelters, SPCAs, and Humane Societies.

• “Glory in Simple Artistic Achievements Day”, by posting your kid’s ‘fridge art’ perhaps?

• “International Polar Bear Day”, declared by non-profit conservation group Polar Bears International to heighten awareness of the declining population of the big white guys of the Far North.

• “Kahlua Day”, celebrating the coffee-flavored liqueur from Mexico that contains rum, corn syrup, and vanilla bean. Mix it with milk and – voila! – a ‘brown cow’.

• “No Brainer Day”, when we’re encouraged to slack off. Any activity attempted should be something done without serious thought … a ‘no brainer’ activity. (Like this show, for instance.)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2005 [12] Jamie Foxx wins a ‘Best Actor’ Oscar for his portrayal of Ray Charles in the movie “Ray”

2015 [02] Actor, director, photographer, and writer Leonard Nimoy, most popularly known as ‘Dr Spock’ on “Star Trek”, dies at age 83 from Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2015 [02] 56-year-old Madonna says she’s suffered whiplash after being pulled backward by a cape which was supposed to fall from her shoulders at the “2015 Brit Awards”, causing her to fall off stage and down a flight of stairs

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1827 [190] 1st ‘Mardi Gras’ celebration in New Orleans LA (and 1st co-ed flashes to get a cheap string of beads)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1988 [29] ‘Longest Tandem Bicycle’ is unveiled in New Zealand, measuring 72.96 ft and weighing 340 lbs

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Tues] Mardi Gras
[Tues] Shrove Tuesday
[Tues] International Pancake Day
[Tues] Floral Design Day
[Tues] Tooth Fairy Day
[Tues] Rare Disease Day

THIS WEEK IS . . .
Cheerleading Week / Cowboy Poetry Week / Ghostwriters Week / Invasive Species Awareness Week / Telecommuter Appreciation Week / Pet Sitters Week / Write a Letter of Appreciation Week

BULL’S BITS

BEST OF BS:
Highlight bits culled from 23 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS SIGNS YOUR CAR’S GETTING OLD:
✗ Your friends are constantly saying, “No, no, it’s okay really … I’ll get an Uber.”
✗ You’ve got terrible foot blisters from its “Fred Flintstone” braking system.
✗ Even dogs can’t bring themselves to use a tire.
✗ You often find yourself requesting, “Fill the oil, check the gas.”
✗ It has more miles on it than Madonna.
– First published in “BS” 1995.

STRANGE FOOD ETIQUETTE RULES WORLDWIDE:
• When in China, you should burp at the dinner table if you enjoyed the food
• When in France, the bread is typically placed directly on the table rather than on a plate.
• When in Italy, you should never ask for extra cheese on something unless it’s offered.
• When in Korea, drinks from elders should be accepted with both hands.
• When in Japan, finishing everything on your plate signals the meal was good and you are finished.
• When in Portugal, don’t ask for salt & pepper if they aren’t on the table. It will offend the chef.
• When in England, bananas should be eaten with a fork and knife.
– First published in “BS” 2014.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
If we are what we eat; I’m cheap, fast, and easy.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
Which weapon is used in women’s fencing?
a. Sabre.
b. Foil. [CORRECT]
c. Backstabbing dagger.
– TriviaCrackAnswers.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What odd thing do you carry in you purse or wallet?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The most unusual thing people say they put ketchup on is fried chicken, followed by THIS.
Answer: Scrambled eggs.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Today is the last day of your life so far.

NOW ON OUR SHEET LIST:
Ryan Smith @ 106.9 Kicks Country [WKXD] Cookeville TN; Ben Edmonds @ Truckers.FM London UK; Scott Gartner @ WBAC Cleveland TN; Mick Oakley @ Tri-Cities Alternative 88.3 [CJIQ] Kitchener ON; and Joe Ogden @ Dance FM Dubai UAE.

Monthly Planning Calendar in Tomorrow’s “BS”!