January 29, 2016

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Friday, January 29, 2016        Edition: #5620

Monthly Planning Calendar in Today’s Edition!

★ Muse frontman Matt Bellamy is a co-owner in the new Drone Racing League after joining a consortium that’s invested $8 million in the project. The DRL has revealed the Brit rocker is among a number of well-off businessmen, including Miami Dolphins owner Stephen Ross, to show interest in taking drone racing to the public. The first DRL event will take place behind closed doors at Sun Life Stadium in Florida, with fans able to watch highlights from each race on YouTube. Muse’s latest album is titled “Drones”, and they’re currently on their “Drones World Tour”.
– WENN.com
★ Actress Kerry Washington has landed a new role as Creative Ambassador for cosmetics firm OPI. The fashion-forward “Scandal” star is known for her polished looks on and off the red carpet, and now she has created a range of nail colors to compliment her wardrobe styles. The actress says the line has nothing to do with “Scandal”, unlike her previous clothing endeavour, but she couldn’t resist naming one of the new varnishes after her character ‘Olivia Pope’, a dark shade called ‘Liv in the Gray’. Kerry’s OPI collection, which features 15 different shades, hits retailers in August.
– ContactMusic.com
★ And 42-year-old Tyra Banks is a new mom. The former supermodel-turned-“America’s Next Top Model” TV producer-host has surprised fans this week by announcing she and her boyfriend of 2 years, photographer Erik Asla, are the proud parents of little York Banks Asla. The baby boy was born via a surrogate. Last year Banks divulged that she & Asla had been trying to start a family together, and had undergone IVF treatments after struggling to conceive naturally.
– “People”

• “American Ninja Warrior” (ABC) – Sunday it’s ‘USA vs The World’ when the reality competition returns. Teams from America, Europe, and Japan tackle the punishing finals course in Las Vegas NV.
• “Brave Miss World” (Netflix) – Today the release of a new documentary about Linor Abargil who, at age 18, survived a violent stabbing and rape … just before winning Miss World. She’s now a lawyer and advocate for others whose lives have been impacted by sexual violence.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Today Hilary Duff (“Breathe In/Breathe Out”).
• “Grease: Live” (FOX) – Sunday a 3-hour live presentation of the former stage musical and film. Cast includes Julianne Hough, Carly Rae Jepsen, Vanessa Hudgens. The opening theme “Grease (Is the Word)” is by Jessie J.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Weezer (“Blue Album”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Goldroom (“It’s Like You Never Went Away”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Tonight Catfish & The Bottlemen (“The Balcony”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight The Front Bottoms (“The Front Bottoms”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Tonight Andra Day (“Cheers To the Fall”). Rerun.
• “Meredith Vieira” (syndicated) – Today Timbaland (“The Emperor of Sound: A Memoir”). Rerun.
• “SAG Awards” (TBS/TNT) – Saturday the 22nd annual Screen Actors Guild Awards are presented to individual actors and entire casts of TV and movie productions. “House of Cards” and “Trumbo” lead nominations with 3 apiece. About 80% of SAG winners in the individual acting categories have gone on to win Oscars.
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Today a performance by the Broadway cast of “School of Rock”.

• Charlie Puth – Today he releases his debut album, “Nine Track Mind”. He’ll kick off his first-ever North American headline tour in support of the release on March 3rd in San Francisco CA.
• Rihanna – “Anti” her first album in almost 4 years was reportedly set for release today but some fans were able to get a sneak peek of the record 2 days early due to a glitch in the system. For about 20 minutes on Wednesday afternoon, the tracklist appeared on Tidal and a number of users were able to preview the songs.
• Selena Gomez – The 23-year-old started out on kids’ TV shows “Wizards of Waverly Place” and “Barney & Friends” but in recent years she has mainly focused on her pop music career. However, that is all set to change with a role in “Neighbors 2” and the indie film “The Fundamentals of Caring”, which premiered at the Sundance Film Festival this week.

• “Fifty Shades of Black” ( R-Rated Comedy ): In this send-up of “Fifty Shades of Grey”, an inexperienced college student meets a wealthy businessman whose sexual practices put a strain on their relationship. Stars Marlon Wayans, Kali Hawk, Fred Willard, Mike Epps. Rated ‘R’ for strong crude sexual content including some graphic nudity, and for language throughout.
NET: http://50shadesofblackmovie.com
• “The Finest Hours” ( PG-13 Historical Drama ): Follows the true story of the US Coast Guard’s daring rescue attempt off the coast of Cape Cod MA after a pair of oil tankers are destroyed during a blizzard in February 1952. On a small lifeboat faced with 70-foot-high waves, 4 guardsmen try to bring back more than 30 stranded sailors trapped aboard a rapidly-sinking vessel. Stars Chris Pine, Holliday Grainger, Casey Affleck, Ben Foster.
NET: http://movies.disney.com/the-finest-hours
• “Jane Got a Gun” ( R-Rated Western ): In this long-in-the-making period drama, a brave woman (played by Natalie Portman) asks her ex-lover for help in order to save her outlaw husband from the ultra-violent ‘Bishop Boys’ gang that’s out to kill him. Co-stars Joel Edgerton, Ewan McGregor, Rodrigo Santoro.
NET: https://www.facebook.com/JaneGotAGunFilm
• “Kung Fu Panda 3” ( PG Animated Adventure ): In this 2nd sequel to the 2008 film, ‘Po’ continues his ‘legendary adventures of awesomeness’. He faces two hugely epic, but different threats … one supernatural and the other a little closer to his home. Big-name voice cast includes Jack Black, Bryan Cranston, Dustin Hoffman, Angelina Jolie, Jackie Chan, Lucy Liu.
NET: http://tinyurl.com/hvxsnc6

If you can identify with any or all of these you’re getting, er, longer in the tooth …
• The founding of Apple Computer.
• The first-ever Platinum album (“Their Greatest Hits, The Eagles”).
• ‘The Blues Brothers’ on “Saturday Night Live”.
• The films “Rocky”, “Taxi Driver” and the 1st “Rocky Horror Picture Show” midnight screening.
• Actors Ryan Reynolds and Benedict Cumberbatch. Actresses Alicia Silverstone, Reese Witherspoon, and Rashida Jones.
• The NFL’s Seattle Seahawks.
• Toronto’s CN Tower.
• TV shows “Family Feud”, “Laverne & Shirley”, and “The Muppet Show”.
• Alex Haley’s bestseller (and TV miniseries) “Roots: The Saga Of an American Family”.
• The Hair Club for Men. (If you remember it, you likely need it.)
– Condensed from MentalFloss.com

The older a person gets, the less likely they are to understand sarcasm.
– “The Times”


1945 [71] Tom Selleck, Detroit MI, TV actor (‘Frank Reagan’ on “Blue Bloods” since 2010, “Las Vegas” 2007-08)/movie actor (“Three Men & a Baby”)

1954 [62] Oprah Winfrey, Kosciusko MS, TV network mogul (OWN)/TV talk show host (“Oprah” 1986-2011)/movie producer-actress (“Selma”)/magazine publisher (“O”)

1968 [48] Ed Burns, Queens NY, movie actor (“Saving Private Ryan”)/movie producer-director (“She’s the One”)

1970 [46] Heather Graham, Milwaukee WI, movie actress (“The Hangover” movies, “Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me”)

1975 [41] Sara Gilbert, Santa Monica CA, TV personality (“The Talk” since 2010)/TV actress (“Big Bang Theory” 2007-10, “Roseanne” 1988-97)

1982 [34] Adam Lambert, Indianapolis IN, pop singer (“Whataya Want from Me”)/2009 “American Idol” runner-up

1983 [33] Eric Paslay, Abilene TX, country singer (“She Don’t Love You”, “Friday Night”)

Oldies musician Phil Collins is 65; Movie actor Christian Bale (“American Hustle”) is 42; Rock guitarist Carl Broemel (My Morning Jacket) is 42; Rapper Kid Cudi (“All Of the Lights””) is 32.

TV/movie actress Minnie Driver (“About a Boy”) is 46; TV actress Portia de Rossi (“Arrested Development”) is 43; TV actress Kerry Washington (“Scandal”) is 39; Pop singer Justin Timberlake (“Suit & Tie”) is 35; Country singer Tyler Hubbard (Florida Georgia Line) is 29; Folk-rock singer Marcus Mumford (Mumford & Sons) is 29.

• “Corn Chip Day”. Ask listeners to put a half-dozen in their mouths and whistle a tune.
• “Curmudgeons Day”, an annual celebration of the crusty, yet insightful, wags who consistently apply the needle of truth to the balloons of hypocrisy and social norms. Always celebrated on the birthday of late comedian WC Fields, one of the all-time most beloved curmudgeons.
• “Fun At Work Day”, because experts say when we enjoy our work, we are more productive. So here’s a few BS suggestions on ways to have fun at work …
– Don’t be content just photocopying your ass, scan it into your PC and enhance it with Photoshop!
– Bring a chainsaw, but don¹t use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say ‘Just in case’ mysteriously.
– Move the ‘Reserved’ sign on the boss’ parking space one space to the left … every day.
– Put a straw in your mouth and your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw.
– Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.
– Put your trash can on your desk. Label it ‘IN’.
• “Guide Dog Day”, commemorating ‘The Seeing Eye’, North America’s first guide dog school which opened in Nashville, Tennessee on this date in 1929. The name is trademarked.
• “Preschool Fitness Day”, observed on the last Friday in January to underline the importance of physical fitness for preschool children.
• “Puzzle Day”, celebrating one of our all-time favorite pastimes. What’s your favorite: Jigsaw or Crossword?
• “Winterlude” through February 15th, the 38th annual celebrating the season outdoors in Canada’s capital region of Ottawa-Gatineau. Highlights include ice sculptures, a playground made of snow, and best of all, the Rideau Canal, touted as the World’s Longest Skating Rink.
NET: http://www.canadascapital.gc.ca/celebrate/winterlude

• “Croissant Day”, the first step of which is being able to say the French-derived word ‘croissant’. It’s not ‘CROY-sent’, it’s ‘cwah-SAHN’.
NET: http://www.punchbowl.com/holidays/national-croissant-day
• “Inane Voicemail Message Day”, a time to change, shorten, replace, or delete that annoying voicemail message … which you likely recorded on Day One and then never altered.
NET: http://www.wellcat.com/january/national_inane_answering_message.htm
• “Seed Swap Day”, observed annually on the last Saturday in January to encourage gardeners to share resources with other gardeners and thereby reduce the need to buy expensive seeds from commercial suppliers. (After last year’s failures, we’re about ready to throw in the trowel.)

• “Inspire Your Heart with Art Day”, a day to encourage your child to draw or paint a picture with no direction, suggestion, or correction from you. Even better … create along with them.
• “World Leprosy Day”, an annual observance on the last Sunday of January to increase public awareness about leprosy and to further leprosy eradication. (It’s not just biblical!)

2009 [07] Kelly Clarkson makes the largest leap to date in ‘Billboard Hot 100’ chart history, rising 96 places to #1 with “My Life Would Suck Without You”

2014 [02] Over 100,000 Americans sign a petition to deport Canadian citizen Justin Bieber out of the USA after his arrest for DUI and driving without a valid license (doesn’t happen)

1936 [80] 1st members of Baseball Hall of Fame announced in Cooperstown NY: Ty Cobb, Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner, Christy Matthewson, and Walter Johnson

1963 [53] 1st members of NFL Hall of Fame announced in Canton OH, including Jim Thorpe, Red Grange, and George Halas

[Feb 1] Car Insurance Day / Change Your Password Day / International Face & Body Art Day / Serpent Day / Spunky Old Broads Day
[Feb 2] “The People v OJ Simpson: American Crime Story” debuts (FX) / Candelmas / Crêpe Day / Groundhog Day / Sled Dog Day / Play Your Ukulele Day / World Wetlands Day
[Feb 3] “Madoff” miniseries debut (ABC) / Girls & Women in Sports Day / Signing Day
[Feb 4] Facebook Day / USO Day
[Feb 5] “Hail, Caesar!”; “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies” open in movie theaters / 47th NAACP Image Awards / “Sleepy Hollow” season debut (FOX) / Shower With a Friend Day / Weather Forecasters Day / Western Monarch Day / World Nutella Day / Give Kids a Smile Day / Wear Red Day / Working Naked Day
[Feb 6] Canadian Maple Syrup Day / Doodle Day / Bubble Gum Day / Girl Scout Cookie Day / Take Your Child To the Library Day
[Feb 7] “Super Bowl 50” (CBS/CTV) / Man Day / Dump Your Significant Jerk Day / Ballet Day / Periodic Table Day / Wave All Your Fingers At Your Neighbors Day
[Feb 8] “Full Frontal With Samantha Bee” debuts (TBS) / Family Day (BC) / Laugh & Get Rich Day / Chinese New Year / Opera Day
[Feb 9] Mardi Gras / Stop Bullying Day / Pizza Day / Read In the Bathtub Day / Safer Internet Day / Toothache Day / Extraterrestrial Visitor Day / International Pancake Day
[Feb 10] Ash Wednesday / All the News That’s Fit to Print Day
[Feb 11] Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day / Get Out Your Guitar Day / Make a Friend’s Day / Pro Sports Wives Day / Shut-in Visitation Day / Satisfied Staying Single Day
[Feb 12] “American Saturday Night: Live From the Grand Ole Opry”; “Deadpool”; “*How to Be Single”; “Zoolander 2” open in movie theaters / NAACP Day
[Feb 13] MusiCares Person of the Year (LA CA) / Desperation Day / Employee Legal Awareness Day / Get a Different Name Day / International Condom Day / World Radio Day / World Whale Day
[Feb 14] “Vinyl” debuts (HBO) / Valentines Day / Autism Sunday / Ferris Wheel Day / International Book Giving Day / Pet Theft Awareness Day / Have a Heart Day / Singles Appreciation Day / Donor Day / Quirky Alone Day / World Marriage Day
[Feb 15] 58th Grammy Awards / Presidents Day (USA) / Family Day (AB/ON/SK) / Westminster Dog Show begins (NYC) / Clean Out Your Computer Day / Gum Drop Day / Hippo Day
[Feb 16] Almond Day
[Feb 17] “Survivor Kaoh Rong: Brains vs Brawn vs Beauty” debuts (CBS/Global) / PTA Founders Day / World Human Spirit Day
[Feb 18] Battery Day / Eat Ice Cream for Breakfast Day / Drink Wine Day / Hate Florida Day
[Feb 19] “Race”; “Shut In”; “Viral” open in movie theaters / “Love” debuts (Netflix) / Chocolate Mint Day / Lashes Day / Love Your Pet Day
[Feb 20] Northern Hemisphere Hoodie Hoo Day / World Day for Social Justice
[Feb 21] “Friends” reunion special (NBC) / International Mother Language Day / Daytona 500 (Daytona Beach FL)
[Feb 22] Full ‘Snow’ Moon / Museum Advocacy Day / Margarita Day / World Thinking Day
[Feb 23] Curling is Cool Day / Diesel Engine Day / Dog Biscuit Day / Spay Day USA / Single Tasking Day
[Feb 24] 2016 Brit Awards (London UK) / National Cupcake Day (Canada) / World Bartender Day / Inconvenience Yourself Day
[Feb 25] Introduce a Girl to Engineering Day / Chili Day
[Feb 26] “Ben Hur”; “Kipnap”; “The Witch” open in movie theaters / “Fuller House” released (Netflix) / Personal Chef Day / For Pete’s Sake Day / Bacon Day / World Pistachio Day
[Feb 27] International Polar Bear Day / International Sword Swallowers Day / Open That Bottle Night
[Feb 28] 88th Academy Awards / Floral Design Day / Tooth Fairy Day
[Feb 29] Leap Year Day / Bachelors Day / International Underlings Day / Rare Diseases Day


• ‘Black(ish) Tie’
• ‘Camo Casual’
• ‘Hats Only’
• ‘Gender Optional’
• ‘Divorce Settlement Chic’
• ‘Fifty & Frumpy’
• ‘Creative Mocktail’
• ‘Zombie Fabulous’
• ‘Nip Slip Formal’
• ‘Smart Funeral’
– Adapted from McSweeneys.net

☎ If you could teleport by blinking your eyes, where would you go right now?

Question: THIS costs about 8 cents per square inch and you likely buy a lot of it.
Answer: Pizza.

People will buy anything that’s one to a customer.

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