January 9, 2015

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Friday, January 9, 2015    Edition #5372

You’re Up to Your Eyeballs in Sheet!

★ “National Enquirer” has dropped a bombshell about veteran “60 Minutes” correspondent Steve Kroft. The new edition of the tabloid details a 3-year affair Kroft has been having with married NYC lawyer Lisan Goines. Since meeting in 2011, their relationship has involved hotel romps and racy sexting. In a statement, Kroft has verified the report and made a public apology to his wife, 55-year-old journalist Jennet Conant, and family. Quote: “My wife and I are committed to each other and are working hard to get past this, and consider it a private matter.” (Amongst “60 Minutes” staffers, 69-year-old Kroft is known as ‘The Kid’.)
– PageSix.com
★ Appearing at a Television Critics Association event ahead of this weekend’s “Golden Globe Awards”, co-host Tina Fey has been was asked if the deadly events at satirical magazine “Charlie Hebdo” in Paris, France give her pause for thought as a creative person who often does edgy comedy for a living. Quote: “This obviously is a terrible event, tragic and upsetting, [but] you cannot back down on free speech in any way. Even if it’s just dumb jokes … we have the right to make them.” (We’re all for freedom of speech as well. But on the other hand, is it wise to poke a rabid dog with a stick?)
★ 38-year-old Brit actor Benedict Cumberbatch (“The Hobbit”; “Sherlock”) is expecting a baby with his theater director/actress fiancée Sophie Hunter. The twosome first revealed their engagement via newspaper announcement a couple of months back, and now it seems they’ve been given another reason to celebrate. Ben’s rep has released a statement saying, “I am delighted to confirm that Benedict Cumberbatch & Sophie Hunter are expecting their first child. They are both over the moon.” The couple made their red carpet debut together at the NYC premiere of “The Imitation Game” in November. (What’s a good baby name to go with ‘Cumberbatch’?)
– WENN.com
★ And in its continuing bid for world domination, Netflix has announced a new slate of original shows, most notably the comic book superhero series “Daredevil” beginning April 10, starring Charlie Cox (“The Theory of Everything”). Other Netflix offerings coming up: “The Adventures of Puss in Boots” (January 16), the Mattel toy spin-off “Ever After High” (February 6), “Mako Mermaids” (February 13); the new Tina Fey series “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” (March 6); and the legal thriller “Bloodline” (March 20). Perhaps most exciting of all, Netflix’s signature drama “House of Cards” returns for its 3rd season February 27. (Meaning 13 straight hours of that weekend will be lost to binge-viewing.)
– ContactMusic.com

• AFI Awards (Los Angeles CA) – Today American Film Institute recognizes its choices for top movies & TV programs of the past year. Alphabetically the films are: “American Sniper”, “Birdman”, “Boyhood”, “Foxcatcher”, “The Imitation Game”, “Interstellar”, “Into the Woods”, “Nightcrawler”, “Selma”, “Unbroken”, and “Whiplash”. Honored TV shows: “The Americans”, “Fargo”, “Game of Thrones”, “How to Get Away with Murder”, “Jane the Virgin”, “The Knick”, “Mad Men”, “Orange Is the New Black”, “Silicon Valley”, and “Transparent”. Honorees are being saluted at today’s annual AFI private luncheon.
• “Girls” (HBO/HBO Canada) – Sunday the 4th season debut of Lena Dunham’s critically-acclaimed dramedy. It’s followed by the premiere of “Togetherness”, a new comedy that follows 2 couples living under the same roof.
• “Golden Globe Awards” (ABC/CTV) – Sunday Amy Poehler & Tina Fey return to host (for a 3rd and final time) the 72nd annual film & TV honors from the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. Nominees for ‘Best Original Song In a Motion Picture’: “Big Eyes” from “Big Eyes” by Lana Del Rey; “Glory” from “Selma” by John Legend & Common; “Mercy Is” from “Noah” by Patti Smith & Lenny Kaye; “Opportunity” from “Annie” by Sia; and “Yellow Flicker Beat” from “The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1” by Lorde. Other category nominees listed here …
NET: http://tinyurl.com/netq7el
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Priory (“Weekend”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Broods (“Evergreen”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Tonight Nicole Atkins (“Slow Phaser”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Tonight jazz great Herbie Hancock. Rerun.

• Coldplay – Chris Martin & Jennifer Lawrence are reportedly giving romance another chance after breaking up in October. J-Law was said to be unhappy with Martin’s ‘friendliness’ with his ex, Gwyneth Paltrow, but has apparently now reconciled with that. According to an insider, “They’re solid and see each other when they can.”
• Marilyn Manson – In a new “Rolling Stone” interview, the 46-year-old rocker claims he has  ‘sexual congress’ 5 times a day, but never removes his underwear … for fear of a house fire. (When someone asks what ‘TMI’ is, cite this as the best example.)
• Papa Roach / Seether – Tonight they hit the road on a co-headlining tour that begins in Orlando FL and wraps in Las Vegas NV February 7th.
• Sam Smith – Tonight in Atlanta GA he begins his first-ever arena & theater tour of North America which runs through February 4th in Vancouver BC. Venues include NYC’s Madison Square Garden and The Forum in LA. Singer-songwriter George Ezra is the opening act.
• Sia – Sia + Shia = 1 weird video. A shirtless Shia LaBeouf wears nude boxer-briefs to cage-fight with 12-year-old “Dance Moms” star Maddie Ziegler in Sia’s bizarre new video for “Elastic Heart”. The 39-year-old Australian pop star co-directed the 5-minute film herself.
• Taylor Swift – On both the new ‘Billboard 200’ and Nielsen SoundScan sales chart, “1989” is the #1 album for the 8th time.

• “Taken 3” ( PG-13 Crime Thriller ): In this 3rd & final instalment in the series, Liam Neeson’s ex-government operative ‘Bryan Mills’ is accused of a ruthless murder he never committed or even witnessed. As he’s tracked and pursued, he uses his particular set of skills to find the true killer and clear his name. Co-stars Forest Whitaker, Maggie Grace, Famke Janssen.
NET: http://www.taken3movie.com
• Opening in limited release: “Beloved Sisters” (Romantic Drama); and “It’s All So Quiet” (Drama).

Are antioxidants a waste of money? A new long-term study of retirees by the University of California at Irvine suggests that eating expensive ‘superfoods’ and/or taking supplements will NOT help you live any longer than those who just eat well overall. Antioxidants, including vitamins A, C and E, are plentiful in vegetables and fruits and may help protect against cell or DNA damage. As a result, they’ve long been touted for cancer and heart disease prevention, as well as warding off dementia. But those who eat well seem to experience lower risks of certain diseases as well, and it’s unclear whether that’s because of antioxidants, something else in these foods, other foods in their diet, or other lifestyle choices. (Now can we stop eating bark, twigs and – blech! – kale?)
– Reuters Health

Welp, we’re a bit over week into it now. Which have you failed to do?
✓ Lose weight.
✓ Exercise.
✓ Quit smoking.
✓ Quit drinking.
✓ Get a new job.
✓ Get out of debt.
✓ Save money.
✓ Eat healthier.
✓ Spend more time with family.
✓ Spend less time on Facebook.
– List25.com

Addicted to posting selfies? Then you’re probably selfish and may even be a psychopath, claims a new study from Ohio State University. The study also reveals that ‘self-objectification’ may be a bigger problem for men than previously thought, with many taking the time and effort to edit and improve their selfies before posting them online. Men who Photoshop their pics before sharing them show signs of narcissism, and men who post selfies regularly score higher than average for levels of anti-social traits. Researchers warn that such behaviors, while they may seem trivial now, can lead to further problems. (Such as years of your life slipping away while you obsessively photograph and Photoshop your ugly mug.)
– Dailymail.com

Japanese women can now book an all-inclusive ‘Solo Wedding Trip’ to Kyoto and experience everything … except an actual wedding.
– Mashable.com


1944 [71] Jimmy Page, Heston UK, classic rock musician (Led Zeppelin-“Stairway to Heaven”, “Whole Lotta Love”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1992-Yardbirds, 1995-Led Zeppelin)

1967 [48] Dave Matthews, Johannesburg, South Africa, alt-rock singer (Dave Matthews Band-“Where Are You Going”, “The Space Between”)/Farm Aid Board of Directors

1978 [37] AJ (Alexander James) McLean, West Palm Beach FL, pop singer (Backstreet Boys-“Just Want You to Know”, “Shape of My Heart”)

1982 [33] Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge (Kate Middleton), Reading UK, wife of Britain’s Prince William/mother of Prince George

1984 [31] Drew Brown, Boulder CO, pop guitarist (OneRepublic-“Counting Stars”, “Apologize”)

1989 [26] Nina Dobrev, Sofia, Bulgaria [raised Toronto ON], TV actress (‘Elena Gilbert’ on “The Vampire Diaries” since 2009, “Degrassi: The Next Generation” 2006-09)

Oldies singer Rod Stewart (“Tonight’s the Night”) is 70; Oldies singer Pat Benatar (“Hit Me With Your Best Shot”) is 62; Rock singer-songwriter Brent Smith (Shinedown) is 37.

TV actress Phyllis Logan (“Downton Abbey”) is 59; Pop-rock guitarist Tom Dumont (No Doubt) is 47; R&B singer Mary J Blige (“London Sessions”) is 44; Movie actress Amanda Peet (“Togetherness”) is 43; TV actress Aja Naomi King (“How to Get Away With Murder”) is 30.

• “Cassoulet Day”, an annual food holiday dedicated to the traditional French dish. The rich, slow-cooked casserole originated in the south of France and typically contains meat (pork sausages, goose, duck, sometimes mutton), pork skin (couennes), and white beans.
• “Play God Day”. So what would you do if you were the Big Guy/Big Gal for a day?
• “Static Electricity Day”. Guess you can count on this being a bad-hair day.
• “Step-Fathers Day”, a day to honor ‘all step-fathers everywhere who come into our lives and hold a special place in our hearts’. You know … that boyfriend that Mommy left Daddy for.

• “Bittersweet Chocolate Day”, the kind you can eat with less guilt because it has less sugar. And unlike milk chocolate or white chocolate, it does not contain any milk solids.
NET: http://www.punchbowl.com/holidays/bittersweet-chocolate-day
• “Cut Your Energy Costs Day”, a day to help both the environment and your bottom line. So what’s your best tip?
• “Houseplant Appreciation Day”, a day to salute their therapeutic value in lifting your mood and outlook. And if you’re a gardener, they give you an opportunity to play in the dirt until Spring arrives in the seemingly far, far distant future.
• “Peculiar People Day”, a good day to have listeners call in stories about the extraordinary, unusual, strange, odd, uncommon, intriguing, different, abnormal, and quirky people they know.
NET: http://www.altiusdirectory.com/Society/peculiar-people-day.php

• “Fruitcake Toss Day”, your opportunity to finally throw away that now hard-as-rock holiday fruitcake. Go for distance!
• “Global No Pants Subway Ride”, the 14th annual public participation event that began in NYC, then spread to subway systems worldwide. This year pranksters are expected to drop trou in over 50 cities, including Calgary, Chicago, London, Sydney, Toronto, Washington, and Vancouver. What’s the point? Fun!
NET: http://improveverywhere.com/missions/the-no-pants-subway-ride/
• “Hot Toddy Day”, saluting the steaming hot spiked Winter bolster. What goes in yours?
• “Human Trafficking Awareness Day”, drawing attention to efforts to eradicate modern-day slavery around-the-world.
• “International Thank-You Days”, launched in 1994 as a week-long opportunity to thank someone from your past who did something nice for you.
• “Tattoo Pride Day”, a day to show off your ink. Hey, I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.

2000 [15] Sitcom “Malcolm In the Middle”, starring Frankie Muniz & future “Breaking Bad” actor Bryan Cranston, premieres on FOX-TV

2005 [10] In celebration of his 70th anniversary, Elvis Presley’s “Jailhouse Rock” is re-released in the UK (the first of several reissued Elvis hits that reach #1 in Britain)

2007 [08] Apple CEO Steve Jobs unveils the ‘iPhone’ at the Macworld convention in San Francisco CA (within days, people quit looking up)

1975 [40] ‘Longest Continuous Yodel’ is recorded, lasting 5 hours and 3 minutes (Stop that incessant caterwauling! Stop it … now!!!)

[Mon] Clean Off Your Desk Day
[Tues] Make Your Dream Come True Day
[Tues] Poetry at Work Day
[Wed] Caesarean Section Day
[Wed] International Kite Day
[Wed] Dress Up Your Pet Day
This Week Is …Women’s Self-Empowerment Week
This Month Is … Financial Wellness Month


✓ “Sorry, I can’t make it to drinks tonight. I’ve got plans with friends.” (BS translation: “I’m going home to watch Netflix and drink alone because I can’t stand your terrible face any longer.”)
✓ “It’d be great if you could put that in an email.” (BS translation: “An email will be much easier to ignore than your droning on.”)
✓ “I need to book out a few hours this afternoon to tackle email.” (BS translation: “And by email you understand I mean Candy Crush.”)
✓ “I’m going to the gym after work.” (BS translation: “Pub.”)
✓ “We should set up a meeting about this soon.” (BS translation: “We are never going to talk about this again.”)
– Adapted from BuzzFeed.com

To that impatient idiot who followed me on [local freeway] yesterday … excuse me for driving so closely in front of you.

By age 40, the average person will have had 30 what?
a. Visits to the ER.
b. Pairs of sunglasses. [CORRECT]
c. Single socks lost in the laundry.

☎ What’s one ‘Best Picture’ winner from the past you’re ashamed you haven’t seen?

Question: More than half of parents polled say THIS is harder to do with baby boys than girls.
Answer: Name them.

A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience.

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