BS SHOW  BIZ BUZZ:
Movie producer Judd Apatow (“Pineapple Express”) is developing an (unwanted) new “Pee-Wee Herman” film with 57-year-old actor Paul Reubens (he’s been out of the limelight since1991 when he was busted for ‘enjoying himself’ while watching the X-rated film “Nurse Nancy” in a theater) . . . Oscar-winning Spanish actor Javier Bardem (“No Country For Old Men”) has signed up for a guest role on “Glee” (FOX), playing a rocker who befriends Kevin McHale’s character ‘Artie Abrams’ in an upcoming episode (this is now the cool show to cameo) . . . A rep for Katie Holmes, however, is denying the actress will make a rumored 5-episode guest appearance on the show, telling GossipCop.com “The Glee story is not true” (apparently her puppet-master changed his mind) . . . According to “New York Magazine”, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner will each get a ridiculous $25 million for “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn” parts 1 & 2 – PLUS a 7.5% cut of the films’ gross (it’s estimated that’ll work out to about $41 million apiece) . . . The now-shooting movie sequel “Scream 4” (spelled “Scre4m”) is becoming a true horror show, with actresses Lauren Graham (“Parenthood”) and Lake Bell (“It’s Complicated”) dropping out; and Hayden Panetierre (“Heroes”) and screenwriter Kevin Williamson (“The Vampire Diaries”) reportedly unhappy (leaving Rachel McAdams pretty much shouldering the load) . . . And word has it actor Colin Farrell may play Ozzy Osbourne in an upcoming movie version of his autobiography, “I Am Ozzy” (now Farrell can justify the 1990s as ‘research’).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Chelsea Lately” (E!) – TI (“King Uncaged”, due September 28).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) – Paramore (“Brand New Eyes”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Broken Bells (“Broken Bells”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – BoB (“The Adventures of Bobby Ray”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – The Hold Steady (“Heaven Is Whenever”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Stars (“Five Ghosts”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – The Black Keys (“Brothers”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – Hot Chelle Rae (“Lovesick Electric”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – The top 8 contestants perform 2 routines each.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Big Boi (“Sir Lucious Left Foot, The Son of Chico Dusty”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Coldplay – They’ve thanked fans for supporting their campaign to save Britain’s BBC 6 Music, an alternative radio station featuring lesser-known rock acts. This week the corporation’s chairman announced the station will remain on-air.
• George Michael – The 47-year-old has-been pop star has been arrested after smashing his Range Rover into a London photo shop called ‘Snappy Snaps’. He only recently completed a 2-year driving ban that was imposed after similar previous incidents.
• Justin Bieber – A poll on his “My World Tour” page asks fans which country he should tour next. The vote has now turned viral, ever since some Bieber-hater suggested North Korea. That’s now the favored destination of almost half-a-million voters.
• Kings of Leon – Caleb Followill tells “Q” magazine he vomited and almost fainted when he & brother Nathan visited a tattoo parlor. Staff had to slap him to keep him from passing out. Afterward they made him autograph the slop bucket.
• Lady Gaga – She’s reached 10 million fans on Facebook, making her the first living entity to achieve that level. She ranks 6th overall, according to UK website Famecount. The entire list …
NET: http://www.famecount.com/facebook-rank
• Men At Work – An Australian federal court has ruled that Colin Hay, Ron Strykert, and their record label EMI must give up 5% of the royalties since 2002 from their international #1 hit “Down Under” (1981) because the track sampled parts of “Kookaburra Sits In the Old Gum Tree”, a song written by an Aussie music teacher for the Girl Guides in 1934. They got lucky – the court could have awarded up to 60% of the song’s total income.
• Pussycat Dolls – Nicole Scherzinger is rumored to be a judge on the upcoming US version of Simon Cowell’s popular UK talent show “The X Factor”.

BS CUTTING-EDGE VOCAB:
New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘Hamster’ – Bar slang for a beer left momentarily unattended by someone that gets picked up by someone else. (“Thanks to pre-drinking at Derek’s apartment and stealing hamsters all night at the club, Dennis managed to enjoy an entire night out at zero expense.”)
• ‘Steganography’ – The process of encrypting secret data in images or text. The name comes from “Steganographia”, title of a book written in 1499. (“The Russian spies were busted after it was noticed they’d transferred secrets online using steganography in ‘The Bull Sheet’ logo.”)
• ‘Tenpercentery’ – Show biz lingo for a talent agency. (“He was surprised to find out that his tenpercentery’s cut from each of his movies was actually 15%.”)

DIGITAL DOWNLOADS DYING:
Downloads of music to iPods, computers, and other devices have stalled, according to Nielsen SoundScan, growing just 0.3% this year. Furthermore, ringtones, which peaked in 2007 at $714 million in sales, have since fallen by 24%, according to researcher SNL Kagan. And data from NPD Group shows that the number of music enthusiasts using iTunes, Amazon.com, and other digital music stores has leveled off at about 40 million. (Have you stopped downloading or just stopped paying?)
– FMQB.com

QUIT LOOKING AT ME!
After more than a thousand experiments, scientists at Freiburg University Hospital in Germany have concluded that we may have a ‘sixth sense’ that we’re being stared at. Researchers admit the effects are small, but there is evidence that people feel a ‘prickling’ sensation when someone unseen is staring at them. (Their next study will determine if your ears really do get a burning sensation when someone’s talking about you.)
– “British Journal of Psychology”

BS QUICKIES:
• Shockwave therapy can provide a quick, painless, and effective treatment for impotence, according to a ground-breaking new study. Researchers believe that an ultrasonic blast – in the proper area – can restore a man’s virility. (Will sitting on your subwoofer work?)
– DailyMail.co.uk
• Since her big reveal as NY governor Eliot Spitzer’s escort in 2008, former call girl Ashley Dupre has pursued pop music, posed for “Playboy”, and penned a dating advice column in the “NY Post”. Now she’s changing careers again, completing studies to become a real estate agent. (She’ll still be screwing customers out of their money.)
– AOL News
• Sergei Gorbunov, director of diving at Russia’s Vladivostok Maritime College, has created a diving suit … for his dachshund. Thanks to his special doggy diving suit, complete with oxygen tank, ‘Boniface’ is said to be comfortable underwater. But that may be because he’s fed sausages before and afterward. (Someone’s likely already looking at turning this into another really bad ‘Air Bud’ movie.)
– Mail Online
• In an attempt to rid the country of ‘decadent Western cuts’, Iran’s culture ministry has produced a catalogue of haircuts that do not meet with government approval. The list of banned styles includes ponytails, mullets, and elaborate spikes. Elvis-style ‘quiffs’ are apparently okay. (They’re gonna party like it’s 1959.)
– News-Gate.info

ROUGHING IT … NOT:
For the 2nd consecutive Summer, Georgian Bay Islands National Park of Canada is offering what’s called the ‘All-Inclusive Camping Experience’. Basically, you just show up; all equipment and activities are included in the cost, from pre-assembled luxury tents to guided hikes, canoeing, and campfires. You arrive at a campsite that is completely set up with tent, sleeping bags, food, firewood, and more. A similar service is offered in the USA by Krismark Outfitters, which sets up campsites and excursions on the fringes of Acadia National Park in Maine.
NET: http://www.pc.gc.ca/pn-np/on/georg/ne/ne3.aspx
NET: http://bit.ly/ciP2US
– “Canadian Living”

SCREEN TIME REPERCUSSION:
Children who spend many hours a day glued to the TV or playing videogames may be harming their ability to concentrate and focus on tasks in school, researchers suggest. A new study by psychologists at Iowa State University has found that kids who exceed the recommended 2 hours per day of screen-time are 1.5-to-2 times more likely to have attention problems in the classroom. (On the upside, students with really boring teachers suffer the same problem.)
– “Globe & Mail”

DIVORCE IS CONTAGIOUS:
A new study has found the heated emotions aroused by a divorce can be transferred like a virus, causing others to divorce. According to the findings of sociologists & psychologists from 3 North American universities, a split-up between immediate friends increases a person’s own chances of getting divorced by 75%. Also people who have a divorced sibling are 22% more likely to get divorced than those who do not. The researchers have tagged this phenomenon ‘divorce clustering’. Fortunately, couples with children seem less susceptible to being influenced. (When visiting a newly divorced friend, always wear a surgical mask.)
– “Telegraph”

ODDBALL VACATION IDEAS:
Ask listeners to add to this list of creative vacations for those lacking time and/or money …
• Don’t have much time off? Take a few aimless drives through the countryside.
• Organize a Summer block party.
• Get in training to enter a road race or walkathon.
• Try staying up all night at a casino or singles resort.
• Jumping through the sprinkler can awaken your inner child, as can catching fireflies in a jelly jar, or weaving dandelion crowns.
• Rent a quiet cabin in the woods where you can commune with nature.
• Suffering from heat exhaustion? Head for the mountains!
• Visit offbeat places of interest (ie: World’s Largest Pig, Tire Man, Vulcan Tourist & Trek Station, or Bruce the Moose), then show off the photos at your first annual ‘Christmas in July’ party.
NET: http://www.roadsideattractions.ca

DID YOU KNOW?
98% of Twitter users are within 6 degrees of separation, according to a new statistical breakdown. On average, it takes visiting just 3.32 friends of friends for users to find one of their own followers. (Meaning about every 3rd person is reading Ashton Kutcher’s mindless drivel.)
– “New York Times”

BS CHRONOMETER 07.07.10

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TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1940 [70] Ringo Starr (Richard Starkey), Liverpool UK, rock drummer/bad singer (“Photograph”, The Beatles-“Act Naturally”)  BS FACTOID: He’s encouraging fans to mark his 70th milestone by making the iconic peace sign in his honor at 12 noon and saying ‘peace and love’ . Tonight his All Starr Band plays NYC’s Radio City Music Hall.

1968 [42] Jorja Fox, NYC, TV actress (‘Sara Sidle’ on “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation” since 2000)  BS FACTOID: She’s the youngest child of Montréal-born parents but was raised in Melbourne Beach FL.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chocolate Day”, started by the National Confectioners Association to promote what is almost every woman’s weakness. Some say chocolate from the New World (mostly Mexico) was introduced to Europe on this date in 1550. Suggestions for today’s menu …
– Breakfast: Chocolate cereal; chocolate cream-filled doughnuts; hot chocolate.
– Morning Snack: Chocolate bar to give you a boost until lunch.
– Lunch: A big tall glass of chocolate milk; chocolate pie or pudding for dessert.
– Afternoon Snack: Chocolate covered raisins, which contain both vegetable and fruit.
–  Dinner: Chocolate liqueur aperitif; chocolate-flavored coffee; chocolate cake.
– Evening Snack: Chocolate ice cream, of course!

• “Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together Day”. If she’s a teenager, good luck! Like are you tryin’ to embarrass her or what?

• “Running Of the Bulls” begins in Pamplona, Spain, an annual highlight of the “Fiesta San Fermin”. Starting tomorrow we’ll likely get the usual listing of ‘cornadas’ (wounds from goring).

• “Tell the Truth Day”, challenging each of us to go an entire day without telling a lie or saying anything misleading or dishonest. Is this possible?

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2006 [04] “Pirates Of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest” opens in movie theaters (the 2nd film in the franchise eventually rockets to #4 all-time box office worldwide, at just over $1 billion)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2007 [03] “Live Earth: Concerts For a Climate In Crisis” take place in 11 locations on all 7 continents, featuring performances by over 150 musical acts (which emit like 7 trillion tons of carbon into the atmosphere)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1891 [119] A patent is granted for the ‘Traveler’s Cheque’ (becoming obsolete due to bank cards?)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1985 [25] Boris Becker becomes the youngest tennis player to win the Wimbledon men’s singles title, at age 17

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] “Grease Sing-A-Long” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] Calgary Stampede begins
[Fri] “Despicable Me”; “Predators” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Don’t Step On A Bee Day
[Sat] Teddy Bears Picnic Day
[Sun] World Population Day
[Mon] International Town Criers Day
This Week Is … Nude Recreation  Week
This Month Is … Parks & Recreation Month

BULL’S BITS

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BS SIGNS YOUR KID IS AT A BAD SUMMER CAMP:
• It’s located on the median of [local] expressway.
• Many of the counselors are still wearing their prison uniforms.
• Camp’s native name translates to ‘Land of the Jumbo Blackflies’.
• When you visit, he proudly shows off the tunnel he’s digging under his cabin.
• ‘Craft Time’ entails 16 hours of making counterfeit Nikes.
• The lifeguard is a mannequin with a whistle.
• She’s learned to make flashlight hand shadows using only her middle finger.
• The water level in the lake rises each time someone flushes a toilet.
• Video of a grizzly bear chewing on her leg is now listed ‘Most Popular’ on YouTube.
• Letters home are signed ‘Inmate 109’.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
You know what’s good on chocolate? Chocolate.

BS PHONE STARTER:
If you could wake up tomorrow in the body of someone else currently living, whom would you pick?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: We eat about 11.4 lbs of THIS each year, but it’s not exactly a dietary requirement.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Chocolate. (“USA Today”).

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Happiness is a combination of good health and a bad memory.