July 3 2019

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Wednesday, July 3, 2019 Edition: #6485

The BS Press!

★ Kim Kardashian has listened to the tsunami of criticism that came after she announced the name of her shapewear line as “Kimono”, and has officially declared that Kimono is no more. She took to social media with the announcement, which also seemed to leave out an apology to the Asian fans she had offended with the name in the first place. She did, however recognize that it wasn’t met with the celebration she anticipated, and says now, “I will be launching my Solutionwear brand under a new name.”
★ Tom Holland believes the actor who someday takes over his role as Spider-Man could be playing an LGBTQ version of the iconic character. As he puts it, “The world isn’t as simple as a straight white guy. It doesn’t end there, and these films need to represent more than one type of person.” While Holland admits he has no inside knowledge about the future of the character he plays, he says, “I do know a lot about the future of Marvel, and they are going to be representing lots of different people in the next few years.”
★ Grace Jones has reportedly quit her cameo in the new James Bond movie. She played iconic villain ‘May Day’ in 1985’s “A View to A Kill” opposite the late Sir Roger Moore as 007, and was due to appear in “Bond 25” to celebrate the milestone movie in the spy franchise. However, she decided not to go ahead with her appearance after being disappointed at the size of her role following her arrival on set.
★ “The Big Bang Theory” star Kaley Cuoco has a new gig. She’ll be starring in a 1-hour drama series titled “The Flight Attendant”, which will air on WarnerMedia’s forthcoming streaming service. At this point, there is no announced premiere date for the show. Cuoco’s contract with WarnerMedia also allows her to develop ideas for original television projects through her production company “Yes, Norman”.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Kevin Hart, Marshmello featuring Chvrches (R)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Amy Poehler, Ryan Eggold, Vampire Weekend (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Mindy Kaling, Seth Green (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Andy Cohen, Sen. Amy Klobuchar, Regina Spektor (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Eric Bana, Billie Lourd, Emily Heller (R)
• “Conan” (TBS): Kevin Nealon (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Ramona Singer, Craig Conover (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Joe Biden (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Cary Elwes, Jake Busey, guest co-hosts Vanessa Williams & Carnie Wilson
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Kate Hudson, Pitbull, Winston Duke, Daughtry
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Minnie Driver, Cirque du Soleil acrobat Jon
Stranks, Maren Morris (R)
• “CMT Hometown Heroes” (CMT): Brantley Gilbert honors a Military Child Of The Year Award recipient. Chris Janson assists a family in need of extensive home repair. RaeLynn hosts expectant military mothers at a Star-Spangled Baby Shower.

• Pink – has a namesake after a fan gave birth at her concert last week in Liverpool. After Denise Jones welcomed a baby girl during Pink’s set last Tuesday, she named her daughter Dolly Pink, despite having initially planned on naming her Dolly Louise. Pink shared a screenshot of a news story about the birth, along with the caption: “Dolly Pink wanted to get the party started.”
• Ariana Grande — has deleted an Instagram Story post congratulating Scooter Braun on his acquisition of Big Machine records. She’s seemingly withdrawn her public show of support for her manager after Taylor Swift complained she felt ”grossed out” knowing the music mogul – who she accused of ”bullying” her – now owns her master records. Nicki Minaj, Adele, Miley Cyrus, Gwen Stefani, Rihanna, Lana Del Rey, Selena Gomez and Camila Cabello have also reportedly stopped following Braun on social media.
• Tina Turner – says she considers her marriage to Erwin Bach to be her only union because she was forced to tie the knot with her abusive first husband Ike Turner. She was married to Ike from 1962 to 1978, but says their marriage was something she went through with to avoid another fight with him. She married the German music executive Bach in 2013.
• Rick Springfield – has called off his music festival in the Dominican Republic as the number of American tourists getting sick and dying in the country continues to grow. In a statement, he said: “…for the peace of mind and well-being of my fans, band and crew, the ‘Rick Springfield & Friends’ event in Punta Cana is being rescheduled to take place at Hard Rock Hotel Cancun in 2020.” The new dates will be determined soon.
• Beach Boys — Mike Love has released a new single called ‘California Beach’. The song is the second track revealed from his forthcoming album, “12 Sides of Summer”, set to hit stores on July 19th.
• Linda Ronstadt – The documentary “Linda Ronstadt: The Sound of My Voice” will be released in theatres in September. It will include archival footage spanning 50 years, culminating in her retirement in 2011 due to her battle with Parkinson’s disease. Emmylou Harris, Dolly Parton, Bonnie Raitt, Jackson Brown and JD Souther are some of the friends and collaborators interviewed for the film.
• Granger Smith — has a new mission in life after his 3-year-old son River drowned in his family’s pool last month. Granger and his wife, Amber are requesting that donations be made to Dell Medical Center, where River was treated. Last week, the couple donated a check for more than $218,000 raised from the sale of t-shirts made in River’s honor. Granger says he finds solace in the good he can do while keeping his son’s memory alive.
• Kenny Chesney – wrote his next single, ‘Tip of My Tongue’ with Ed Sheeran. Chesney calls their get together with a third writer, Ross Copperman, “one of the most fun sessions I’ve done in a long time.” The song will be released on July 12, and will appear on Chesney’s next studio album.

Here’s the latest wedding trend, and it’s one that might save people like me a stop on the way home: McDonald’s delivery. That’s right. Some couples are deciding to forego the midnight serving of triangular sandwiches and cheese trays in favor of a surprise delivery of McDonald’s treats for their guests at their reception. It saves a lot of planning for the couple, and let’s face it, the wedding guests just might prefer a cheeseburger and fries or some McNuggets rather than some unidentifiable dish that a caterer put together, or a plate of warmed-over egg-salad sandwiches. And these days, with apps like SkiptheDishes and UberEats, not to mention McDelivery, having hot food delivered is easier than ever. In fact, one couple recently had 450 burgers (300 with cheese, 150 without) delivered to their after-party, and that was after a six-course meal earlier in the evening.
(Because nothing says “I’m hammered” like cramming a burger into your face while dancing with a suit on!)
(Of course at my wedding, that was what we had for dinner…)
(For once, the price my gift for the couple exceeded the price of the meal!)
-TorontoStar, FOX

If you have a social media-mad teenager, cover his or her ears for a minute. WhatsApp and other social media apps may not be as bad for people as previously thought. A new study by researchers at Edge Hill University found that spending time interacting with friends and family on WhatsApp is good for a person’s psychological wellbeing. People who spent more time on WhatsApp (a messaging app) reported higher levels of self-esteem and less feelings of loneliness. And Dr. Linda Kaye, a senior lecturer in psychology at Edge Hill, says that they also found that the more time that people spent on WhatsApp, the closer they felt to their friends and family, and they “perceived these relationships to be (of) good quality.” Previous studies have found that social media can be detrimental to a person’s mental health, particularly apps like Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat. This latest research, which involved 200 social media users, suggested that group conversations could actually benefit people by offering social support. It is thought that social technology such as WhatsApp may stimulate existing relationships and opportunities for communication, and enhance users’ wellbeing as a result.
(OK, you can take your hands off your teenager’s ears now!)
(Does anybody use WhatsApp anymore?)
(Do you think the telephone got the same bad rap when it was a new thing?)

Most painful:
➢ Inner wrist:  Even some who have full sleeve tattoos say it was most painful body part they have ever had done.
➢ Stomach:  Many report the stomach as one of the most painful places. And the back of the knee, the neck, the throat and the ribs are also near the top of the list.
(Or they are as long as we’re keeping this list G-rated…)
Least painful:
➢ Shoulder:  It has fewer nerve endings, so for most, it’ll be less painful to be inked there.
➢ Also:  The calf, buttocks and outer arm
(***See “BS Random Joke”, below***)
-Keep in mind, pain level and pain tolerance are subjective, and what’s killer for one person might be a blip on the radar for another.
(In my experience, the most pain was felt when my father saw it!)
(And if you think it hurts to get a tattoo, just wait ‘til you want to have it REMOVED!)

Sometimes a woman just wants a free dinner. A study published in the Journal of Social Psychology and Personal Science found up to a third of heterosexual women agreed to a date with a man they had no romantic interest in just so they could get a free meal. Researchers dubbed the practice “a foodie call.”


1943 [76] Kurtwood Smith, New Lisbon WI, TV actor (‘Red Forman’ on “That 70’s Show” 1998-2006, “The Ranch” since 2017)

1962 [57] Tom Cruise (Thomas Mapother IV), Syracuse NY, movie star (“Risky Business”, “Jerry Maguire”) COMING UP…”Top Gun: Maverick”, 2020

1962 [57] Thomas Gibson, Charleston SC, TV actor (‘Aaron Hotchner’ on “Criminal Minds” 2005-16)

1964 [55] Yeardley Smith, Paris, France, TV voice actress (‘Lisa Simpson’ on “The Simpsons” since 1989)

1971 [48] Julian Assange, Townsville, Australia, Entrepreneur (founder of WikiLeaks) BS FACTOID: He is currently incarcerated in HM Prison Belmarsh, London, England

1973 [46] Patrick Wilson, Norfolk VA, movie actor (“Insidious”, “The Conjuring”) COMING UP…”Midway”, 2019

1980 [39] Olivia Munn, Oklahoma City OK, movie actress (“Magic Mike”, “Iron Man 2”)/TV actress (“The Newsroom” 2012-14, “The Daily Show” 2010-11) COMING UP…”Love. Wedding. Repeat”, 2020

1989 [30] Elle King (Tanner Elle Schneider), Los Angeles CA, pop singer (‘Ex’s & Oh’s’, ‘America’s Sweetheart’)/daughter of actor Rob Schneider

• “Compliment Your Mirror Day”, Participation involves complimenting your mirror on having such a wonderful owner and keeping track of whether other mirrors you meet during the day smile at you. (This is much more easily done if you have a prescription for medical marijuana)

• “International Plastic Bag-Free Day”, a day to pick paper over plastic or, even better, a bag that’s reusable. “Disposable” plastic bags are one of the world’s worst environmental problems.
NET: http://www.plasticbagfreeday.org

• “Stay Out of the Sun Day” (unless you’re working on a melanoma collection) At least they decided NOT to have this on a Sunday!

• “Chocolate Wafer Day”, These crispy, sweet snacks are an American favorite, with their waffle surface pattern and thin layers. Variations of chocolate wafers can also be found around the world. In Egypt, there are special kinds of wafers called “freska” that are only sold on the beach in the summertime

• “Eat Your Beans Day”, celebrating beans of all sizes, shapes and colors. Beans (legumes) are one of the longest-cultivated plants, dating back to the seventh millennium BC. They are also an excellent source of protein, fiber, iron and complex carbohydrates (not to mention fart jokes…)

• “American Redneck Day”, you might be a redneck if…
✓ You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard
✓ You mow your lawn and find a car
✓ You can spit without opening your mouth
✓ Your brother-in-law is your uncle.

[Thurs] Alice in Wonderland Day
[Thurs] U.S. Independence Day
[Fri] Bikini Day
[Fri] Comic Sans Day

1985 [34] “Back to the Future” opens in movie theaters, starring Michael J Fox, Christopher Lloyd, and a customized 1981 DeLorean DMC-12 sports car (the first film of a trilogy)

2012 [07] “The Amazing Spider-Man”, starring Andrew Garfield & Emma Stone, opens in movie theaters (goes on to gross over $750 million worldwide)

1971 [48] Jim Morrison of The Doors is found dead in a bathtub at age 27. No autopsy is performed, and while drugs are suspected, the official cause is listed as heart failure

2002 [17] Elton John becomes the first-ever performer to be granted an honorary doctorate from England’s Royal Academy of Music

2018 [01] Cardi B becomes first female rapper to score two number one US Billboard hits, with ‘I Like It’ with Bad Bunny and J Balvin (her previous #1 was ‘Bodak Yellow’)

2004 [15] Maria Sharapova wins her 1st Grand Slam tennis title by beating Serena Williams 6-1, 6-4 at Wimbledon

1988 [31] Rocky Kenover sets a world record by skydiving 403 times within 24 hours, averaging 1 jump every 3 minutes using 7 planes, 10 pilots, and 50 parachute packers (The record now? 640!)


✓ 35 years after leaving school, the majority of people can still identify 90% of their classmates.
✓ Drinking wine before a meal makes you eat 25% more.
✓ Earth is farthest from the sun in July and closest to the sun in January.
✓ Apple has enough money to buy every major sports team in the world.
✓ The woman who made cannabis brownies famous by baking and distributing them to AIDS patients was actually named Mary Jane.
✓ “Surprise me” were the last words of 100-year-old comedian Bob Hope, responding to his wife’s question regarding where he would like to be buried.
-KickassFacts, UberFacts

• That breeze is way too pleasant.
• This rain is way too wet!
• This rain is NOT gluten-free!
• It’s cloudy, but still no meatballs.
• I can’t go outside, the oxygen level is too high.
• It’s too weathery.
• It’s just not humid enough.
• Why do they never include rainbows in the forecast? That’s weather!
• The sun makes my butt look big.
• It’s too perfect out and now I don’t have an excuse to stay inside.
• It’s raining men.
• That whole “hurricane in the forecast” thing.

Best of BS . . .

• A bark-B-Q
• Having drinks with friends & telling the story of how they almost got that darned mailman.
• Eating and pooping.
• Partying with no clothes on!
• Being grilled and eaten. Whoops. Wrong kind of dog.
• Following children and drunk people around, waiting for someone to drop some food.
• Sleeping as much as possible, same as me.
• Lighting up some barklers.
• Pausing to reflect on the sacrifices of the brave people who helped form this great nati—SQUIRREL!!!
• Banning fireworks.
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018

Some day, I’m going to get a tattoo that says “Nothing Lasts Forever”.

What unusual item do you put on your burger? According to a poll, the top 5 items are …
1. Tomato (70%)
2. Bacon (64%)
3. [TIE] Onion/Mustard (51%)
4. Cheese (40%)
5. Mayonnaise (34%)

Question:  19% of people cannot name a single one of THESE. What is it?
Answer:  Author

Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today.


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