Tuesday, July 30, 2024 — Edition: #7765
Deja Moo!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
The Bull Sheet is heading off for its annual summer holiday and will not be publishing Monday, August 5 through Friday, August 9. All subscribers will receive credit for the non-service days. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Monday, August 12.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ In the wake of the news breaking over the weekend that Ben Affleck has purchased a new house — without Jennifer Lopez, now she has posted a pic of her kids, calling them her “whole heart”. J.Lo remained silent on the real estate situation, instead hopping on Instagram to upload new photos of herself with her 16-year-old twins Emme and Max, and writing in the caption, alongside a few heart emojis: “My whole heart.” Lopez shares her twins with her ex-husband Marc Anthony. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/y6tbyems
-Cosmo, People
★ Katherine Schwarzenegger is baby-bumping along. A month after news broke that she is pregnant with baby #3, she and Chris Pratt confirmed the news with pics of her budding belly. Pratt posted a photo on Instagram of his wife at an outdoor event wearing pink overalls, calling her the “greatest party planner in history.” She shared her own snaps, showing her cuddling a white rabbit. After having a look at her slideshow, many were convinced that her outfit hinted at baby #3’s sex. Schwarzenegger, who is already the mother of 2 daughters, sported plaid pink overalls. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/bdd3mtaz
-PageSix
★ With the blockbuster success of “Deadpool & Wolverine”, Disney’s Marvel Cinematic Universe has become the first film franchise in history to cross $30 billion at the global box office. The achievement was announced during the studios’ presentation at San Diego Comic-Con. Deadpool & Wolverine pushed the total haul across the coveted milestone after scoring a $205 million domestic opening weekend — the biggest ever for an R-rated release and the 8th-highest of all time. It earned an estimated $400 million globally over the weekend.
-Variety
★ A bikini worn by Carrie Fisher in “Star Wars Episode VI Return of The Jedi” has sold for $175,000. The iconic gold costume, which also included hip rings and bracelets and was worn by the late actress when her character ‘Princess Leia’ was captured and chained up by ‘Jabba the Hut’, went under the hammer at Heritage Auctions in Dallas. The auction also saw a miniature Y-Wing starfighter ship used in a mission to destroy the Death Star in “Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope” sell for $1.55 million.
-Bang!
★ Glen Powell is bringing the laughs this spooky season. He’ll make a guest appearance on the upcoming Halloween special episode of “Family Guy”, voicing competitive pumpkin carver ‘Patrick McCloskey’. At the show’s San Diego Comic-Con panel, it was revealed that he’ll appear in the first of 2 Hulu-exclusive holiday Family Guy specials. The official synopsis reads: “Peter and his friends aim to unseat the reigning champion (Powell) in Quahog’s annual Pumpkin Contest by any means necessary.” It is scheduled to premiere Oct. 14.
-Variety
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Anthony Anderson guest hosts, Gina Rodriguez, Meagan Good, Pepe Aguilar (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Gov. Gretchen Whitmer, Martha Stewart (R)
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Bassem Youssef, Jay Jurden, Todd Barry (R)
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Rob Delaney, Liza Colón-Zayas
• “The Daily Show” (COM): TBA
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Jay Ellis
• “The Talk” (CBS): Paul Reiser (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Zooey Deschanel, Bernadette Peters
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Awkwafina, Chelsea Clinton, Victoria Garrick Browne, Ernie Hudson, Drake Milligan (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (R)
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Joel McHale (R)
• “2024 Paris Olympics” (NBC, CBC): Women’s gymnastics team final, women’s 100m backstroke and more in swimming, surfing finals.
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): Daughtry, Papa Roach, Earth, Wind & Fire and The War & Treaty.
• “Port Protection Alaska” (NGC): Extended episode: residents try to recover from a harsh winter.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Taylor Swift – recently confirmed what every fan probably already knows: She is godmother to Ryan Reynolds’ 4 children with his wife (and Taylor’s close friend) Blake Lively. Reynolds even recently joked about how Swift’s babysitting rate “costs a fortune”.
• Justin Timberlake – His lawyer has argued the DWI case against him should be dismissed. Edward Birke told reporters outside court on Friday: “He was not intoxicated. I’ll say it again. Justin Timberlake was not intoxicated.” Inside, he argued that police “made a number of very significant errors in this case.”
• Queens of the Stone Age – has pulled out of 7 European festival appearances as Josh Homme recovers from emergency surgery. This comes a month after they were forced to cancel 8 tour dates in Europe as Homme returned to the US. No details on the nature of his surgery. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mr286amc
• Pink Floyd – 80-year-old drummer Nick Mason says he wants to use AI to create new music for the band, because there is no chance of a band reunion, thanks to the feud between David Gilmour and Roger Waters, who left in 1985. Quote: “It would be fascinating to see what AI could do with new music. If you tried to run it as a sort of ‘Where did Pink Floyd go after?’”
• Neil Young – Never one for overkill, he has announced another installment of his retrospective series. “Archives Vol. III” will be released Sept. 6. The 17-CD box set features 198 songs, 15 of which are previously unreleased in any capacity, and 121 are previously unreleased versions. All were recorded between 1976-87. Also included are 5 Blu-Ray discs, which contain 11 films, and a 176-page book.
• Post Malone – Brad Paisley is one of the big names who will appear on Posty’s new album “F-1 Trillion”. Target reportedly accidentally leaked the songs list on its pre-order page. In addition to already-released collabs with Morgan Wallen, Blake Shelton and Luke Combs, the record features appearances by Paisley, Hardy, Dolly Parton, Lainey Wilson, Jelly Roll, Tim McGraw, Chris Stapleton, Ernest and more. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yeh49jb6
• Old Dominion – Guitarist Brad Tursi is coming off a great week. Not only did he release his first solo album “Parallel Love”, he also got engaged. He posted: “Whelp….that’s it folks. Roxanne King has taken this guy off the market!…I am just beyond grateful that this smart, funny, sensitive, gorgeous, special soul has entered my world. I’m a better man for it, and I’m lucky to be loved by her.”
• Little Big Town – will celebrate its 25th anniversary with the Aug. 9 release of “Greatest Hits”. The package will include 3 new collabs: Sugarland joins the group on a cover of Phil Collins’ ‘Take Me Home’, Kelsea Ballerini appears on a new version of the group’s 2010 song ‘Shut Up Train’, and Miranda Lambert is featured on an update of the band’s 2010 single ‘Little White Church’.
SHOOTING THE BULL
OLYMPIC DREAMS:
Many of us, I’m sure, are watching the Paris Olympics from the comfort of the couch, bag of chips in hand, and wondering to ourselves: “Why don’t I look like that?” And while it is natural to compare ourselves to others, experts say we should cut ourselves some slack. As Dr. Amadeus Mason, medical director for USA Track and Field pointed out, most of the competitors spend their entire lives training for this one moment. That means it is unrealistic to expect to look like an Olympian, but it might be a good thing to enjoy the Games – and become inspired by them. Athletes don’t make it to the Olympics by accident — they identified a goal, assessed what it would require of them mentally and physically, and then addressed their obstacles and limitations. Mason suggests we do the same with our personal goals, but recognize the destinations will be different. For instance, if you’re a working mom, it might even be considered a lofty goal to work out consistently for 30 minutes, 5 days a week. And remember: It’s easy to put Olympians on a pedestal, but working out is their full-time job.
(Well…that and filming commercials, apparently…!)
(On the other hand, I’m sure most Olympians would look at me, and be very jealous of how many pretzels and burgers I get to eat!)
-CNN
TROLLING THE TROLLS:
Have you ever been told that you have a “dark” sense of humor? Or maybe you didn’t even have to be told…you just knew. And while I’m sure that those who possess a dark sense of humor are as funny in their own way as anyone, there is a…well…a dark side. A new study published in Behavioral Sciences determined that those with dark humor are more likely to engage in online trolling. And what’s more, they don’t appreciate it when their antagonism turned back on them. In other words, trolls don’t like being trolled. Online trolling is a social behavior characterized by deception and disruption. A troll tries to incite controversy simply to watch people turn against each other. And now, the doozy: The researchers’ findings also indicate that people who possess a dark sense of humor are more likely to demonstrate sadism and Machiavellianism (being cunning, scheming, and unscrupulous).
(Well, I don’t know if I’d go as far as to call myself cunning, scheming, and unscrupulous…at least when posting under my real name!)
(Fortunately, my sense of humor is waaaay more “dad” than “dark”!)
-NYPost
BEING SCHOOLED ON BACK-TO-SCHOOL SPENDING:
It’s almost back-to-school time, and in addition to all the preparation involved with getting your kids ready to head back to the classroom, there’s also the issue of the COST of back-to-school shopping. With that in mind, a new survey found that 3 in 4 parents say they’d try just about any hack to save money on school supplies – and for some, that even includes stealing from work – and dumpster-diving! The poll of 2,000 parents of elementary school kids in the US uncovered that the top tip parents have for keeping their back-to-school shopping costs under control is this: Purchasing school supplies whenever they go on sale – even if that means waiting until after the kids are back in class. Here are some other the other pearls of wisdom shared by veterans of the back-to school shopping scene:
• Hoarding school supplies throughout the year
• Extreme couponing
• Looking for half-used items around the home
• Joining buy-nothing groups on social media
• Trading supplies with other parents
• And yes, even dumpster diving, suggested by 5% of parents. 12% admitted to stealing supplies from their workplace to send to school with their kids.
(…which sounds odd, but if your parent works at McDonald’s, you’d automatically become the most popular kid in school!)
(…and I’m sorry to be the first this year to use the phrase “back-to-school”! What? Not even close?)
-NYPost
ORIGINS OF COMMON SAYINGS:
⇒ “Elephant in the room”: This, of course, doesn’t mean that there’s an actual elephant in the room (although that would be AWESOME!). It refers to an important topic of conversation that no one is discussing. When there’s “an elephant in the room,” typically a big piece of information, news or and awkward or dramatic moment is being avoided. It is thought the phrase comes from the 1814 story “The Inquisitive Man’, about a character who visits a museum, and fails to notice an elephant in the room. The first recorded use of the phrase as an idiom was in The New York Times in 1959.
⇒ “Turn a blind eye”: The phrase, used to refer to a willful refusal to acknowledge a reality, goes back to the career of the British naval hero Horatio Nelson. During 1801’s Battle of Copenhagen, his ships were pitted against a large Danish-Norwegian fleet. When his more superior officer flagged for him to withdraw, the one-eyed Nelson supposedly brought his telescope to his bad eye and proclaimed, “I really do not see the signal.” He went on to score a decisive victory.
⇒ “Crocodile tears”: We use this phrase to describe a display of superficial or false sorrow. But the saying comes from a medieval belief that crocodiles shed tears of sadness while they killed and consumed their prey. This myth from a 14th century book called The Travels of Sir John Mandeville, which includes the words: “These serpents slay men, and eat them weeping, and they have no tongue.” Shakespeare picked up on this, and “crocodile tears” became an idiom as early as the 16th century.
⇒ “Go cold turkey”: To “go cold turkey” usually refers to someone who quits something for good without delay, preparation, or discussion, like when we speak of a smoker quitting “cold turkey.” In 1921, a newspaper wrote of people “surrendering” to a doctor, who gave them the “cold turkey” treatment. It is thought the phrase comes from the combination of goose pimples and what William Burroughs called “the cold burn” that addicts suffer as they kick the habit. (So, this has nothing to do with deli meat — or Thanksgiving leftovers?)
-Fox, History
DID YOU KNOW?
A man legally has legally changed his name to “Literally Anybody Else”, in order to run for US President. The 35-year-old military veteran and middle school math teacher, formerly known as Dustin Ebey, said he entered the race in order to protest the major-party candidates, which at the time were President Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump. Biden has since withdrawn from the race, and endorsed Kamela Harris as the Democratic candidate. Literally Anybody Else is running a write-in campaign in Texas, where did he did not get the required signatures to make it onto the ballot. But his odd name IS expected to appear on the Tennessee ballot. (I’ve been saying for months that this guy was my dream candidate – and that was before I had even heard of him!)
-UPI
BS CHRONOMETER 07.30.24
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Cheesecake Day”, a day to indulge yourself in one of the most decadent of all desserts. (What’s your favorite kind? Mine’s ‘guilt-free’)
• “Father-In-Law Day”, honoring the spousal parent who has never really been all that impressed with you. (Try to be nice anyway…)
• “International Day of Friendship”, as declared by the UN. It points out that friendship is important in all cultures. When friendship is fostered between people of different groups or countries, it may build a foundation to create understanding and peace between their countries. LINK: https://www.un.org/en/observances/friendship-day
• “Paperback Book Day”, marking the start of the paperback book revolution, which began with publication of Penguin #1, “Ariel, The Life of Shelley” by Andre Maurois, in London, on this date in 1935.
• “Support Public Education Day”, promoting the efforts of administrators, teachers, and parents who aim to maintain a public education system that meets the needs of every student.
• “World Snorkeling Day”. On this day in 1932, Joseph L. Belcher patented “Belcher Breathing Apparatus”. The word ‘snorkel’ comes from the German word ‘schnorchel’, which, loosely translated, means ‘to snore underwater’.
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Mutt Day
[Wed] Uncommon Instrument Awareness Day
[Thurs] World Wide Web Day
[Fri] Beer Day
This Week is…Tequila Week
This Month is…Wheat Month
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1941 [83] Paul Anka, Ottawa ON, oldies pop singer (‘Put Your Head on my Shoulder’, ‘Diana’)/songwriter (‘My Way’, ‘Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson’ theme)
1944 [80] Jimmy Cliff (James Chambers), St James Jamaica, reggae singer (‘I Can See Clearly Now’, ‘Reggae Night’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame 2010 (***birthdate also reported as April 1, July 30 date confirmed***)
1947 [77] Arnold Schwarzenegger, Thal Austria, movie actor (“Terminator” films, “Predator”, The Expendables” films)/politician (38th California governor 2003-11)/5-time “Mr. Universe”
1958 [66] Kate Bush, Kent England, pop singer (‘Running Up That Hill’, w/Peter Gabriel-‘Don’t Give Up’)/Rock Hall of Fame, 2023/Commander of the Order of the British Empire, 2013
1961 [63] Laurence Fishburne, Augusta GA, movie actor (“Man of Steel”, “Matrix” trilogy)/TV actor (“Black-ish” 2014-2022) COMING UP…”Slingshot”, 2024
1962 [62] Alton Brown, Los Angeles CA, chef, TV personality (“Good Eats”, “Iron Chef America”)
1963 [61] Lisa Kudrow, Encino CA, TV actress (“Friends” 1994-2004)/TV producer (“Who Do You Think You Are?” since 2010)/movie actress (“The Other Woman”, “Easy A”)
1964 [60] Vivica A Fox, South Bend IN, movie actress (“Sharknado 2: The Second One”, “Kill Bill” movies)
1968 [56] Terry Crews, Flint MI, TV actor (“Brooklyn Nine-Nine” 2013-2021, “Everybody Hates Chris” 2005-09)/TV host (“America’s Got Talent” since 2019, “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire” 2014-15)/movie actor (“Expendables” films)
1970 [54] Christopher Nolan, London England, movie director-producer-screenwriter (“Oppenheimer”, “Interstellar”, “The Dark Knight” films)
1971 [53] Tom Green, Pembroke ON, comedian/TV actor (“The Tom Green Show”)/movie actor (“Charlie’s Angels”, “Freddie Got Fingered”)/married to Drew Barrymore 2001-02
1974 [50] Hilary Swank, Lincoln NE, movie actress (Oscars-“Million Dollar Baby”, “Boys Don’t Cry”)/TV actress (“Beverly Hills, 90210” 1997–1998). COMING UP…”N.A.R.”
1977 [47] Jaime Pressly, Kinston NC, TV actress (‘Jill Kendall’ on “Mom” since 2014, “My Name Is Earl” 2005-09)/movie actress (“A Haunted House 2”, “I Love You, Man”)
1977 [47] Finneas (O’Connell), Los Angeles CA, pop singer-songwriter/record producer (Billie Eilish, Selena Gomez, Justin Bieber, Nicki Minaj)/10 Grammys/brother of Billie Eilish
1999 [25] Joey King, Los Angeles CA, movie actress (“The Act”, “The Kissing Booth”) COMING UP…”Uglies”, 2024
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2006 [18] After 42 years, the world’s longest running music show, “Top of the Pops”, is televised for the last time on BBC2
2023 [01] ‘Pee-wee Herman’ actor Paul Reubens dies of cancer at age 70
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2003 [21] The ‘SARStock Concert’ in Toronto ON draws about 450,000 to see AC/DC, Rolling Stones, Rush, The Guess Who, Justin Timberlake, and others in a bid to prove the city’s safety after an outbreak of Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS)
2007 [17] Britney Spears divorces rapper-dancer Kevin Federline due to irreconcilable differences after almost 3 years of marriage and 2 children
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1976 [48] American athlete Bruce (now Caitlyn) Jenner sets a world record in decathlon with 8,617 points, and wins Gold at the Montréal Olympics
2002 [22] Brazil wins a record 5th FIFA World Cup championship with a 2-0 victory over Germany
TODAY’S LAST . . .
2003 [21] The last ‘old style’ Volkswagen Beetle rolls off the assembly line in Mexico (best-selling car model in the world at the time, over 21 million sold)
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ A duck can’t walk without bobbing its head.
✓ The left drumstick of a chicken is more tender than the right one.
✓ You’d have to eat 5kg (11lb) of potatoes to gain .5kg (1lb) of weight. (But the butter’ll get ya!)
✓ Kissing someone for one minute burns about 2 calories.
✓ A square piece of dry paper cannot be folded in half more than 7 times.
✓ In China, North American football is known as “olive ball”.
-DidYouKnow, BathroomReadersInstitute
Best of BS . . .
BS HOW HOT IS IT?
It’s sooo hot that…
• I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen.
• My Easy-Bake Oven finally cooked something.
• My ex’s heart is only a little chilly.
• My “Frozen” DVD turned into “Waterworld”.
• Even exhibitionists are staying inside.
• The hipster down the street actually shaved.
• The teenager across the road is wearing his black hoodie with the hood down.
• Wal Mart didn’t even kick me out for being naked. This time.
• Some like it.
• I had a hot flash — and didn’t even notice.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
BS STUFF THAT HAPPENS AT THE LOW-BAR OLYMPICS:
• There’s a break half-way through the 100m dash.
• The medals are made of chocolate.
• It’s possible to get a 10, even from the Russian judge.
• Two words: Synchronized Sitting.
• Highest score in golf: good.
• Everyone must test positive for fast food.
• No medals. Just participation ribbons.
• Limbo contest, obviously.
• They make the athletes sleep in cardboard beds.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2021
BS WEB GOODIE:
At least I’m trying: https://tinyurl.com/57sy9r2m
BS RANDOM JOKE:
Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you’re a consultant.
BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Imagine a ‘best day ever’. What kinds of things would you do?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: You’d probably deny it, but on average, you do THIS about 32 times a year. What is it?
Answer: Break the law
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
A man with outward courage dares to die; a man with inner courage dares to live.
