Monday, June 9, 2008        Edition: #3793
Sweet Sheet!

WEEKEND BLOG & TABLOID BS:
• Jim McKay, the sportscaster who hosted ABC-TV’s popular “World Wide of Sports” for over 40 years and whose adept coverage of the terrorist attack at the 1972 Munich Olympics etched itself on the memory of a generation, died SATURDAY at his Maryland farm at age 86. (Anyone over 35 can likely not only recite the “World Wide of Sports” intro but also hum the theme.)
– E! News
• After months of denying there’s a relationship, former Mr Reese Withersppoon, 33-year-old actor Ryan Phillipe was clearly the escort and arm candy of 25-year-old Aussie actress Abbie Cornish (“Elizabeth: The Golden Age”) at the 2008 “Australian in Film Breakthrough Awards”. The duo met on the set of “Stop-Loss”. (Well that’s one good thing that came out of the flop!)
– “People Magazine”
• Just when you thought popular culture couldn’t be more saturated with “The Hills” comes word MTV is planning a spinoff of its hit ‘reality’ show. The new series follows Whitney Port, Lauren Conrad’s friend & coworker, as she moves to NYC as part of her job with fashion PR firm People’s Revolution. (Heidi & Spencer will likely have a carefully staged hissy-fit for the press even though it’s reported they’ve already made over $3 million pimping out their relationship.)
– “Us Weekly“
• 27-year-old “Ugly Betty” actor Michael Urie (‘Marc St James’) has blabbed that the show’s producers are looking to adapt it for the stage as a full-on Broadway musical but it’s all hush-hush … or at least was. While a stage production is far from a done deal, Urie says a musical episode of the TV show is likely a lock, along the lines of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s” musical episode “Once More With Feeling”. (Don’t worry … we’ll give you lots of warning!)
– Dose.ca
• There’s a new reality TV series called “Bands Go Pop!” in production in the UK (where they all seem to come from), in which former teen idols are given a makeover, using dieticians, personal trainers, choreographers – even major cosmetic surgery if needed – in order to pull off a special live performance. The idea is to turn back the clock to when the acts were at the height of fame. (This I going to be SO embarrassing … like those old doo-wop groups on PBS pledge specials.)
– PopBitch.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Labor Pains” – Production gets underway TODAY in Burbank CA on this romantic comedy starring Lindsay Lohan as an assistant in a stuffy publishing house who pretends to be pregnant in a desperate attempt to keep from getting fired. Could this be Lohan’s last kick at the cat?
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Gnarls Barkley performs onstage.
• “Nashville Star” (NBC) – Billy Ray Cyrus hosts the 6th season of the country music talent search on a new network. Singer Jewel, producer/songwriter Jeffrey Steele, and Big & Rich’s John Rich are the judges. Taylor Swift sings “Picture to Burn” on the series premiere. (CMT will now rebroadcast episodes on FRIDAY nights.)
NET: http://www.nbc.com/Nashville_Star/

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Bo Diddley – SATURDAY at the legendary rock & roller’s funeral in Gainesville FL, attendees sang, danced, and clapped in time to his music … for 4 hours.
• Britney Spears – Her latest cameo is in the Pussycat Dolls’ new music video for “When I Grow Up”, in which she appears driving a car and waves at the Dolls as they pass in traffic … that’s it.
• Rascal Flatts – They’ll appear and perform in “Hannah Montana: The Movie”, currently being shot in the Nashville TN area.
• Tim McGraw – FRIDAY he performed at Wal-Mart’s annual shareholders’ meeting in Fayetteville AR. The retail chain has exclusive rights to sell his “Limited Edition Greatest Hits” package as well as his own flavor of Fritos. Up next: a cologne called ‘McGraw by Tim McGraw’.

PROFITS ARE UP & DOWN:
“Amusement Business” magazine says roller coasters are the key to success for amusement parks. Whenever a park unveils a new coaster, it has one of its bigger seasons. (That’s because you can sell all the riders lunch … twice.)
– AP

AS CLEVER AS A BAG OF NAILS:
Toenail clippings can help predict a woman’s heart-disease risk. How so? Researchers say that, because toenails grow slowly, measuring their nicotine content might offer a long-term estimate of a person’s exposure to tobacco smoke, a major factor contributing to heart disease in women. (In the interest of science … don’t throw them away after you bite ‘em off!)
– BBC News

FROM THE BS POLL VAULT:
A statistical breakdown of life by the numbers …
• 70% of successful businessmen say a prime reason for their success is their mother. (Business women would likely credit … themselves.)
• 50% of surveyed men say they think red lipstick is ‘scary’. (Even on someone else.)
• 48% of women & 35% of men say they feel envy when a co-worker takes a vacation. (Unless it’s someone they hate.)
• 47% of people have looked themselves up online. (We’re betting 53% are lying.)
• 28% of wives will retire before their husbands. (Likely thanks to alimony.)
• 7% of married people say they met their spouses at the gym. (After all, what’s more attractive than a glistening sheen of sweat?)

DAMP SUNBURN:
Wet T-shirts provide less sun protection than dry. Researchers at Trinity University in San Antonio, Texas have found that a dry bleached cotton T-shirt has an SPF factor of 15 when dry, but it drops to just a 5 when it’s wet. (Doesn’t matter; most wet Ts are worn indoors … in bar contests.)
– OxfordJournals.org

WHY UGLY GUYS ARE BETTER:
Marriages in which the woman is rated more attractive than the man are happier than those in which the guy is gorgeous, according to a new study. Why? Researchers think that, throughout evolution, better-looking guys have had more opportunity for mating, which may lead them to be less committed. But a man who marries a woman ‘out of his league’ is more willing to put extra effort into the relationship. (Well [co-host], there’s hope for you after all!)
– “Cosmopolitan”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Workers who were cheerleaders in high school are more likely to hold a vice-president’s job in the corporate world.
– CareerBuilder.com

HE SAID IT:
“The Rock has softer lips … he smells like strawberry shortcake. For me, that’s why they call him The Rock. He rocks people’s worlds.”
– Actor Steve Carell, describing tongue-in-cheek what it was like smooching his co-star for a scene in the movie “Get Smart” (opening JUNE 20th).

BS CHRONOMETER 06.09.08

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1915 [93] Les Paul (Polsfuss), Waukesha WI, guitarist/inventor (solid-body electric guitar, overdubbing, tape delay, phasing, multitrack recording)

1961 [47] Michael J Fox, Edmonton AB, movie actor (“Back to the Future” series)/ex-TV actor (“Spin City” 1996-2000) who quit his hit sitcom to launch the Michael J Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research after being diagnosed with the syndrome

1963 [45] Johnny Depp, Owensboro KY, movie star (“Pirates of the Caribbean” films, “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”)

1978 [30] Michaela Conlin, Allentown PA, TV actress (‘Angela Montenegro’ on “Bones” since 2005)

1981 [27] Natalie Portman (Hershlag), Jerusalem, Israel, movie actress (“Star Wars: Episode I-III”, “Cold Mountain”)

1986 [22] Adamo Ruggiero, Mississauga ON, TV actor (‘Marco Del Rossi’ on “Degrassi: The Next Generation” since 2002)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Donald Duck’s 74th Birthday”. On this date in 1934, he was ‘born’ out of the imagination of Walt Disney as the speech-impaired, web-footed movie star of the animated short, “The Wise Little Hen”. His voice was provided by Clarence Nash.

• “Little League Baseball Week”, always the week beginning the 2nd MONDAY in JUNE. Little League ball was founded in 1939 in Williamsport PA with 3 teams. At the time, a $35 donation would purchase uniforms for all of them.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1993 [15] Tina Turner bio-flick, “What’s Love Got To Do With It”, premieres

2006 [02] Official ‘first pics’ of Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt appear in “People” magazine in North America (for $4.1-million), “Hello!” magazine in Britain/Spain, and in Australia’s “New Idea” (pics of Brangelina’s upcoming twins promise to fetch $15 million-plus)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1822 [186] 1st patent for ‘False Teeth’ (and 1st kid drinks the glass of water on grandpa’s night stand)

1899 [109] 1st ‘Moving Staircase’ built (forerunner of the ‘Escalator’)

1923 [85] 1st ‘Armored Car’ is introduced by the Brinks Co (leads directly to ‘heist movies’)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1965 [43] A newborn baby in New Zealand is given a world-record 2,310 first names (you ought to see his driver’s license!)

1993 [15] Last Canadian team to win the Stanley Cup as Montréal Canadiens beat LA Kings 4 games to 1 for their 24th championship

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Tues] Iced Tea Day
[Wed] Hug Holiday
[Thurs] Kitchen Klutzes Day
[Thurs] NXNE Festival begins (Toronto)
[Thurs] 8th Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival begins (Manchester TN)
[Fri] Friday the 13th
[Fri] “The Incredible Hulk” opens in movie theaters

THIS WEEK IS . . .
Brain Tumor Awareness Week / Carp Week / Clay Week / Fraternal Week / Graffiti Week / International Clothesline Week / Men’s Health Week / Superman Week / Therapeutic Recreation Week / US Flag Week

BULL’S BITS

BEST OF BS:
A highlight bit culled from 15 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS CLASSIC ADS:
We give you the classic ad slogan, you tell us the product …
• “Good to the last drop.” [Maxwell House Coffee]
• “M’m, M’m, Good! [Campbell’s Soup]
• “Nothin’ says lovin’ like somethin’ from the oven.” [Pillsbury]
• “We bring good things to life.” [General Electric]
• “When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.” [Federal Express]
• “The San Francisco treat.” [Rice-a-Roni]
• “Makes hamburgers taste like steakburgers.” [A-1 Steak Sauce]
• “A mind is a terrible thing to waste.” [United Negro College Fund]
• “Betcha can’t eat just one.” [Lay’s Potato Chips]
• “Let your fingers do the walking.” [Yellow Pages]

BS PHONE STARTER:
Who’s face would you like to see on our money?

TRUTH OR BS?
You & your co-host alternate making statements. Your contestant picks which is true and which is just a steaming pile of hooey …
• Chewing gum takes 7 years to pass through the human digestive system. That’s because 90% of it is a natural or synthetic indigestible rubbery substance that resists the body’s efforts to break it down and allows it to lurk in the digestive system year-after-year. [Total and utter BS]
• It was men who first popularized high-heels in the 1500s. The wealthy wore them to keep their feet in stirrups when horseback riding. The expression ‘well heeled’ evolved to describe those who were able to afford the costly shoes. [TRUE]

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: After trying THIS 10 times, the average person will change their mind about it.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: A food they previously disliked.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The grass is always greener when someone else mows it.