Friday, June 2, 2006        Edition: #3297
Ahhhh, It’s Your Daily Bovine Colonic!  

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TONIGHT, “Design: e2″, a 6-part documentary series about environmentally-friendly architecture kicks off on PBS, most notable for its host – Brad Pitt (the only architecture most female viewers will care about) . . . SATURDAY “The 40-Year Old Virgin” and “Wedding Crashers” lead the field of nominees as the “MTV Movie Awards” tape in Culver City CA, hosted by Jessica Alba and featuring AFI, Christina Aguilera, Jamie Foxx, Owen Wilson, TI, and Will Ferrell among others (show airs next THURSDAY) . . . THIS WEEKEND’s CMT “Dukesfest 2006“ at the Music City Motorplex in Nashville TN features all the living members of the original “Dukes of Hazzard” TV cast (1979-85), including John Schneider, Tom Wopat and Catherine Bach (who now wears ‘Daisy Dukes’ with a stretchable spandex panel) . . . SUNDAY “Canada’s Walk of Fame 2006 Induction Gala” airs on CTV (taped SATURDAY), a 2-hour tribute hosted by Canadian WWE star Trish Stratus at Toronto’s Hummingbird Centre honoring the 8 new inductees: movie actor Brendan Fraser, actress Pamela Anderson, singer Jann Arden, singer Robert Goulet, actor Eugene Levy, “Late Show” bandleader Paul Shaffer; “Jeopardy!” host Alex Trebek, and the Olympic medal-winning skiers known as the ‘Crazy Canucks’ (Steve Podborski, Ken Read, Dave Irwin & Dave Murray) . . . SUNDAY Global-TV’s “Falcon Beach” debuts in the USA on ABC Family (will Winnipeg Beach play in Southern California?) . . . SUNDAY at the “Tony Awards” for Broadway’s best of the year (CBS), the Canadian production “The Drowsy Chaperone” leads nominations with 13, including ‘Best Musical’; followed by the Oprah Winfrey-produced “The Color Purple”, up for 11 trophies (there’s no mention of one Julia Roberts … and not a whisper about David Schwimmer) . . . “Fahrenheit 9/11″ director Michael Moore is being sued for circa $85 million by disabled Iraq War veteran Peter Damon who claims he was wrongly portrayed as an anti-war campaigner in the film, causing him ‘loss of reputation, distress & personal humiliation’ (and apparently delayed reaction – by about 2-and-a-half years) . . . And Monaco’s Prince Albert II has now acknowledged that he is the father of a 2nd illegitimate child, this time a 14-year-old girl living in Palm Desert CA (this guy’s a royal version of ‘Johnny Appleseed’!).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Diana Krall – She’ll release her next studio album SEPTEMBER 12th, an as-yet-untitled project that will include her interpretations of several standards.
• Dixie Chicks – “Taking the Long Way” has become the 3rd #1 album of their career, selling over a half-million copies in its first week.
• Kanye West – TONIGHT he guests on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).
• Katharine McPhee – The “American Idol” runner-up’s first single will not be, “My Destiny”, the crap original tune written for her (and arguably what cost her the win), but instead her rendition of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”, to be released JUNE 27th.
• Pearl Jam – TOMORROW they’re the musical guest on “Saturday Night Live” (NBC), hosted by Lindsay Lohan.
• Randy Bachman/Burton Cummings – SATURDAY they kick off a “First Time Around” tour in Victoria BC in support of their recently released “Bachman-Cummings Songbook” album.
• Taylor Hicks – The “American Idol” winner has officially signed with show creator Simon Fuller’s 19 Recordings and Arista Records. His first single “Do I Make You Proud”/”Takin’ It To The Streets” is out TUESDAY. An album is expected later this year.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENING:
“The Break-Up” ( PG-13 Romantic Comedy ): The movie on whose Chicago set Jennifer Aniston & Vince Vaughn either became or didn’t become a couple, depending on the latest gossip. One thing for sure, in the film they play a busted-up couple engaged in a war to force one another to move out of the condo they share – until they both realize they might actually be fighting to keep the relationship alive. Jon Favreau & Ann-Margret co-star.
NET: http://www.thebreakupmovie.net

WHERE HAVE ALL THE ROMANTICS GONE?
Highlights of a new poll on romance sponsored by Travelocity …
• 54% of women describe themselves as ‘true romantics’, compared to just 39% of men.
• 78% of men and about half of women admit they procrastinate when it comes to making special plans or buying a gift for their partners.
• 79% of men & 78% of women say they put off making romantic plans due to either ‘no time’ and ‘no ideas’.
(Sheesh, whatever happened to spontaneity?)
– MSNBC

MORE THAN SAND IN YOUR SHORTS:
Beach sand can be teeming with bacteria even when the water is clean, according to a new UCLA study. Health officials have long known that urban runoff pollutes bodies of water with microbes such as E coli. Now environmental researchers have found that microbes can grow in beach sand as well, and remain there long after the water has flushed itself clean. (Your list of beach gear just got longer: sunscreen, beachball, umbrella, vinyl flooring …)
– “LA Times”

THINK SIMPLE, GET RICH:
Psychologists have found that a key factor in success playing the stock market may be to pick companies with simple names. A study at Princeton University has found that stocks with names that are easy to pronounce regularly outperform those with more complicated monikers. (Let’s see, how do you spell G-E?)
– “GQ”

FASTEST-GROWING COSMETIC SURGERIES:
According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, these are the plastic surgery procedures that are increasing in popularity the fastest …
5. ‘Thigh Lift’ (up 80% over past 5 years)
4. ‘Tummy Tuck’ (115%)
3. ‘Buttock Lift’ (283%)
2. ‘Upper Arm Lift’ (3,413%)
1. ‘Lower Body Lift’ (4,101%)
(For some of these, surgeons need to use a ‘forklift’.)
– “Forbes Magazine”

THE LOST WORLD:
Israeli scientists have uncovered a prehistoric ecosystem dating back around 5 million years, when the Mediterranean Sea covered parts of Israel. The protected habitat, completely sealed off from the world, was discovered during quarry drilling near the city of Ramle. When scientists were called in, they soon found 8 previously unknown species of crustaceans and invertebrates similar to scorpions. Eerily, every new species discovered has no eyes. (Major League Baseball is considering signing them as umps.)
– Reuters

BATMAN TO THE RESCUE:
Military scientists have designed ‘Batman’-style wings to enable paratroopers to glide up to 120 miles into enemy territory. The device enables soldiers to be dropped from an altitude of 30,000 feet and infiltrate enemy lines, without being detected by radar. Germany’s special forces have apparently expressed interest in the innovation. (Some are especially intrigued by the idea of wearing those kinky black rubber suits.)
– AFP

THE LIE HALF OF WOMEN TELL:
A poll of more than 5,000 women finds that fully half admit to lying about their weight. And here’s the real shocker – only 1 in 50 women is actually happy with the way her body looks. Other findings …
• Most women worry about their body every 15 minutes.
• The average woman wants to lose 19 lbs.
• 70% think life would improve if they had a ‘better’ body.
• Almost a third cut the size labels out of their clothing.
• If a woman steps on the scale in the morning and sees she is 2 lbs heavier, it can ruin her day.
• Virtually all respondents have dieted at one point and 41% say they constantly watch what they eat.
• Fully 87% pick their ‘thighs’ as their most-hated body part.
(Advice to all women: get comfortable inside you skin … hopefully, smooth, unwrinkled skin without varicose veins.)
– “Grazia Magazine”

BS AMAZING FACT:
There are more Ford F-series trucks in the world than there are Australians.

THE BULL SHEET 06.02.2K6

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1941 [65] Charlie Watts, Islington UK, rock drummer (Rolling Stones)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1989)  FACTOID The Stones’ interrupted “Bigger Bang” tour is now planned to recommence at the beginning of JULY at a venue and city to be announced.

1941 [65] Stacy Keach, Savannah GA, TV actor (‘Warden Henry Pope’ on “Prison Break”)

1952 [54] Gary Bettman, Queens NY, NHL commissioner since 1993/former NBA executive

1954 [52] Dennis Haysbert, San Mateo CA, TV actor (‘Jonas Blane’ on “The Unit”, ‘David Palmer’ on “24”)

1955 [51] Dana Carvey, Missoula MT, movie actor (“Wayne’s World”)/TV comic (“Saturday Night Live” 1986-93)

1960 [46] Kyle Petty, Randleman NC, NASCAR team owner (PE2)/3rd-generation race car driver/Richard Petty’s son/Lee Petty’s grandson/father of late driver Adam Petty

1978 [28] Nikki Cox, LA CA, TV actress (‘Mary Connell’ on “Las Vegas”)

1980 [26] Fabrizio Moretti, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, rock drummer (The Strokes- “Juicebox”)/engaged to actress Drew Barrymore since 2004

SATURDAY –
Movie actor Tony Curtis (“Some Like It Hot”) is 81; Keyboardist Billy Powell (Lynyrd Skynyrd) is 54; CNN anchor Anderson Cooper (“Anderson Cooper 360”) is 39; Country singer Jamie O’Neal  (“There Is No Arizona”) is 38.

SUNDAY –
Former TV actor Noah Wyle (“ER”) is 35; Bassist Stefan Lessard (Dave Matthews Band) is 32; New mommy Angelina Jolie (“Mr & Mrs Smith”) is 31; Bassist JoJo Garza (Los Lonely Boys) is 26.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Donut Day”, always the first Friday in June, honors the Salvation Army ‘Lassies’ of WWI who  served donuts to thousands-upon-thousands of soldiers. It’s now used as a fund-raiser for the Sally Ann’s needy causes.
• “National Bubba Day”, honoring formally named or just informally called ‘Bubba’. We’re betting most of ‘em live in Dixie. But hey, if it turns your crank you can even adopt the name for the day!
• “Rocky Road Day”, which either has to do with a favorite flavor of ice cream or a career in radio.
• “Shavuot” (“Feast of Weeks”), one of 3 so-called ‘Pilgrim Festivals’ in the Jewish calendar, this one celebrates the Ten Commandments, the foundation of Jewish law.
• “Yell Fudge At The Cobras in North America Day”. To keep the poisonous snakes off the continent, you’re supposed to go outdoors at noon and yell ‘fudge!’ Hey, seems to be working.

SATURDAY –
• “Buffalo Chip Throwing Championship”, the 20th annual ‘fece-off’ flings in Luverne MN. 20 teams of tossers try to target toilets placed up to 40 feet away. The winning team gets the ‘Buffalo Horn Trophy’, a plaque featuring a pair of buffalo horns.
NET: http://www.luvernemn.com/events/buffalo-days/default.asp
• “Canada’s Walk of Fame 2006 Induction”, when this year’s inductees will see their star embedded in the sidewalk in Toronto’s entertainment district, but only temporarily. THIS SUMMER every star on the “Walk of Fame” will be dug up and replaced with new interactive displays that are at eye level. Why? The star idea is basically a rip-off of the “Hollywood Walk of Fame”, and besides – they’re tough to see in the winter!
NET: http://www.canadaswalkoffame.com/
• “Repeat Day”, an opportunity to do things over and over again. “Repeat Day”, an opportunity to do things over and over again. What things are actually better the 2nd time around? Shampooing? Falling in love? Making love? Mexican food?
• “Trails Day”, when you’re invited to ‘take the path to a healthier you’ by going for a hike.
NET: http://www.americanhiking.org/events/ntd/

SUNDAY –
• “International Cancer Survivors Day 2006”, the 19th annual event celebrating those who’ve survived the ‘Big C’, which increasingly seems to include people in the music biz such as Sheryl Crow and Kylie Minogue.
NET: http://www.ncsdf.org/
• “International Mothers’ Peace Day”. If the world won’t listen to the UN, maybe it’ll listen to its mommies?
• “Old Maid’s Day”, a truly outdated observance initiated back in 1948 for unmarried women over age 35. Nowadays 35 is when many women are just beginning to think about having kids.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2004 [02] Ken Jennings begins a run of 74 consecutive wins on TV game show “Jeopardy!” (eventually wins $2.5 million in cash and prizes)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1800 [206] 1st ‘Small Pox Vaccination’ (Trinity NL)

1952 [54] Debut of Canadian television (test pattern on Channel 2 Montréal)

1953 [53] 1st ‘Televised Coronation’ of a monarch (Queen Elizabeth II is crowned in Westminster Abbey some 16 months after the death of her father, King George VI)

1835 [171] 1st  major ‘3-Ring Circus’ in America (no not Congress – PT Barnum)

1886 [120] 1st (& only) US President to marry in the White House (Grover Cleveland)

1896 [110] Guglielmo Marconi patents 1st ‘Radio’ (hey, thanks for the gig, Gug!)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Mon] Personal Computer Day
[Mon] UN World Environment Day
[Tues] Couple Appreciation Day
[Tues] “The Omen” opens in movie theaters (6/6/6)
[Thurs] 35th CMA Music Festival begins
[Thurs] 34th “AFI Life Achievement Award” (LA CA)
This Week Is … Fragrance Week
This Month Is … Adopt A Shelter Cat Month

BULL’S BITS

TOP 10 CANADIAN HOTTIES (FEMALE VERSION):
10. Emmanuelle Vaugier [‘voh-SHAY’] (Vancouver BC) … “Two & a Half Men”, “Saw 2″.
9. Estella Warren (Peterborough ON) … “The Cooler“, “Planet of the Apes”.
8. Neve Campbell (Guelph ON) … “Scream 1-3”, “Wild Things”.
7. Mia Kirshner (Toronto ON) … “The L Word”, “Not Another Teen Movie”.
6. Kristen Kreuk [‘krook’] (Vancouver BC) … ‘Lana Lang ‘ on “Smallville”.
5. Tricia Helfer (Donalda AB) … ‘Number Six’ on “Battlestar Galactica”.
4. Evangeline Lilly (Fort Saskatchewan AB) … ‘Kate Austen’ on “Lost”.
3. Pamela Anderson (Ladysmith BC) … “Stacked”, “VIP”, “Baywatch”, etc.
2. Rachel McAdams (London ON) … “Red Eye”, “Wedding Crashers”, “The Notebook”.
1. Elisha Cuthbert (Calgary AB) … ‘Kim Bauer’ on “24”, “The Girl Next Door”.
– JoBlo.com

WORST US CITIES FOR ROAD RAGE:
According to a recent poll by AutoVantage …
5. Boston MA
4. Los Angeles CA
3. New York NY
2. Phoenix AZ
1. Miami FL
US CITIES WITH THE MOST COURTEOUS DRIVERS:
5. Atlanta GA
4. Seattle WA
3. St. Louis MO
2. Nashville TN
1. Minneapolis MN
– AP
 
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: THIS will happen to 1 in 5 of us at work today.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: We’ll be criticized by the boss.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
He who laughs last is probably your boss.