Wednesday, June 22, 2022 — Edition: #7257
The BS Press!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ During her tell-all “Dateline NBC” interview with Savannah Guthrie, Amber Heard stood firmly by her testimony, presented a binder of allegations against ex-husband Johnny Depp and shared that she still loves the “Pirates of the Caribbean” actor. The Friday interview, though, was far from a ratings bonanza for NBC. The one-on-one conversation delivered a 0.3 rating in the key demographic of viewers ages 18-49, and 2.3 million viewers total, according to Neilson. Heard’s appearance barely elevated Dateline past its normal ratings, and brought in the show’s second-smallest audience since November. Leading up to the special, NBC teased numerous tantalizing snippets, but the episode even fell behind a repeat episode of ABC’s “20/20,” which garnered 2.6 million viewers.
-LATimes
★ Mel B has been announced as a judge for Season 2 of Paramount+’s drag queen singing competition “Queen of the Universe”. She joins returning judges Michelle Visage, Vanessa Williams and Trixie Mattel, along with Graham Norton, who will return as host. Scary Spice takes over for Leona Lewis, who served as judge on the first season. Queen of the Universe follows the world’s most talented drag queens as they battle it out for global domination, and countries go head to head spotlighting their top talent, in hopes of being crowned the “Queen of the Universe.”
-Deadline
★ The second “Yellowstone” prequel has a new name and will change directions slightly. The show once known as “1932” is now called “1923”. Harrison Ford and Helen Mirren are still attached. The name change, as you may have guessed, is because the show will now be set in 1923 Montana, not 1932. This clears up a plot hole: The new Taylor Sheridan series was to focus on the Great Depression and prohibition, but Montana became the first state to repeal prohibition in 1926. Paramount+ says that the Great Depression will still be in play, as it began in Montana much earlier than other states. 1923 will also be set 5 years after the end of World War I, another event which will influence the storytelling. 1923 will debut in December.
-TasteofCountry
★ Ben Stiller marked World Refugee Day on Monday with a trip to Ukraine and Poland to meet with families displaced by war – and to discuss the plight of refugees with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy. In a video posted on Ukraine World’s Twitter page, Stiller, who is also the UN refugee agency’s goodwill ambassador, wore a gigantic smile as he marched up to the president, and said: “This is a great honor for me. You’re my hero” to Zelenskyy, who humbly brushed off his comment.
-TheWrap
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Tessa Thompson, Kevin Morby, guest host Sean Hayes
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Maya Rudolph, Emma Chamberlain, Brett Eldredge
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Taika Waititi, David Sedaris
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): John Mulaney, Jenny Slate, Pheelz, Ralph Alexander
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Chris Pratt, Taylor Kitsch, James Bay
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Caroline Stanbury, Dorit Kemsley
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Julie Andrews, Luke Hemsworth, guest co-host Lindsey Granger
• “The Talk” (CBS): Adam Scott
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Katy Perry, Luke Bryan, Lionel Richie, Ben Rector
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Sarah Silverman, Jon Dorenbos (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Rainn Wilson, Shane West, Howie Mandel, Saleka
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): America Ferrera, Karrie Martin Lachney, Nischelle Turner (R)
• “NHL Playoffs” (CBC, SN, ABC): Stanley Cup final — game #4: Colorado @ Tampa Bay
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (Fox): The top 12 head into the studio rounds; dancers compete in pairs and in the style of the female partner.
• “Planet California (PBS): California’s wildlife adjusts to a world where drought, dams and fire pose dire threats to an ecosystem connected by rivers on land, in the air and in the sea.
• “NBA Draft Preview” (ESPN): In-depth analysis of the upcoming 2022 NBA Draft.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Drake — addressed criticism about his new album “Honestly, Nevermind” at its release party. During his speech, he said: “It’s all good if you don’t get it yet. That’s what we do! We wait for you to catch up.” An Esquire review published on Friday called it “typical”.
• Kate Bush – Cher has responded after Bush’s ‘Running Up That Hill’ topped the UK singles chart, and broke her record as the oldest female artist to hit #1. Cher tweeted: “Records Are Meant 2 Be Broken! Remember Back In The Day, When Women Had SHORT SELL BY DATES!?” Cher was 52 when her track ‘Believe’ hit the top in 1998. Bush is 63.
• Elton John – is selling a ‘Rocket Man’ NFT to benefit his AIDS foundation. He’s partnered with Jadu and Sweet to auction a Rocket Man NFT hoverboard that will let Metaverse avatars fly in style. He’ll also be releasing a series of access tokens that unlock a series of fan experiences as part of the Rocket NFT Club.
• Al Stewart – The British folk-rocker’s career will be saluted with 50-CD(!) box set, out Friday. “Al Stewart – The Admiralty Lights: Complete Studio, Live and Rare 1964 – 2009” weighs in at over 11 pounds (including a book), and is limited to 2000 copies. (Apparently, he has more songs than just ‘Year of the Cat’!)
• Iron Maiden – will cover former singer Paul Di’Anno’s medical expenses, bringing an 18-month fan fundraiser to an end. The fundraiser had raised $15,000 – just over half the target for his urgently needed surgery. The development came after the wheelchair-bound Di’Anno attended a Maiden show and reconnected with the group.
• Kane Brown – His wife, Katelyn, turned 30 on Sunday, and he pulled out all the stops. Vids on his Instagram Stories show her saying she’d be happy with a simple night out eating Mexican food. Brown surprised her with an epic birthday party, featuring friends and loved ones, and a glamorously decked out cake, featuring icing roses, candles that spelled “30” and dazzling sparklers.
• Keith Urban — will perform on the “Today” show’s Citi Concert Series on June 30. To celebrate the 20th anniversary of his breakout album “Golden Road, he has also released a new live version of ‘You’ll Think of Me’. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2erb4ujz
• Carrie Underwood – will honor Barbara Mandrell‘s 50th anniversary as a Grand Ole Opry member by performing 2 shows at the Opry on July 30. Mandrell will be in attendance.
SHOOTING THE BULL
PLAN IT:
Are you starting to plan your next family vacation? Get busy. Vacations are more enjoyable for the whole family when they’re well-planned out in advance. That’s according to a new survey of 2,000 American parents, which found that when preparing for vacations, 1 in 4 say they are the “planners” of their family — the ones who keep everyone on track and organized. Meanwhile, others name their partner or co-parent as an “agent of chaos” who always seems to cause trouble (18%) or is always running late (17%). The poll, for Chase IHG Rewards Credit Cards, also found that 76% of families are able to plan out their entire itinerary within 6 hours over a span of a few days. And six in 10 (61%) families start planning at least 5 weeks in advance. On the other hand, 28% are still frantically getting ready up to the very last minute. More than half (55%) haven’t had a vacation in at least 3 years – but 70% are planning to take one within the next 18 months.
(Wait a minute – if only 1 in 4 parents are “planners”, does that mean in some families, no one is the planner? That could explain why these people haven’t gone on vacation for 3 years!)
(With my family, you can’t even plan a trip to the grocery store – so when it comes to a vacation, it’s every man for himself!)
-StudyFinds
KETCHUP CATCH-UP:
➠ “For best results, refrigerate after opening.” That’s what’s printed on every bottle of Heinz ketchup. But according to the company’s own stats, a full 1 in 5 consumers prefer their ketchup at room temperature. Meanwhile, more than half say ketchup MUST be eaten cold. So, the people at Heinz Canada came up with an alternative solution: Heinz Cold Ketchup. The new limited-edition glass Heinz bottle features an icy blue label that changes color based on temperature. The company says it was designed as a “nod to fans who love it cold, and a challenge to room temperature fans to chill out and try it.” While it’s the same classic condiment inside, Heinz says it hopes the temperature indicator will ease tensions among those who aren’t sure if the ketchup they are about to eat is set for ‘peak performance’. (I don’t care either way…it’s going to get cold when it hits the ice cream, anyhow!)
➠ Mustard-maker French’s inspired an internet meltdown Monday over its new ketchup popsicle. It calls the “Frenchsicle” a “refreshingly savoury & sweet ketchup popsicle, made from 100% Canadian tomatoes,” which will be available for a limited time this summer in Canada. Reactions ranged from “yuk” emojis to multiple references to the 1995 Chris Farley/David Spade movie “Tommy Boy,” in which Spade tells Farley, “You could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves.” The tomato-based ‘sicles are made in collaboration with Happy Pops, which specializes in all-natural ice pops. (Well, I guess you could dip it into frozen fries…) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yckcxuud
-DailyHive, TheWrap
WEENIE ROAST:
Brits are being warned by authorities about sunbathing nude in their own backyards…or as they call them, “gardens”. Apparently, police are advising sunbathers to be careful if they plan to sunbathe naked in their garden but are ‘overlooked by neighbors’, and remind people that there are still rules that must be followed: According to the Crown Prosecution Service, “You will have to decide whether your desire to be naked in your garden is more important to you than being on friendly terms with those around you. As long as it’s clear you mean no harm or distress in displaying your naked body and letting your bits hang freely then you should be fine and avoid running the risk of breaking any laws.” While authorities noted that in an ‘ideal world’ hopefully police wouldn’t be called by a neighbor if they spotted you ‘gardening in the buff,’ they added that ‘in the real world’ it’s best to take some ‘simple precautions’. Those could include sunbathing behind a screen, or finding a corner of your garden which is “less overlooked”.
(My neighbor becomes furious with his wife for sunbathing naked. Personally, I’m on the fence!)
(They DO realize this is the same country that holds the annual London Naked Bike Ride, right?)
(***See “Things Overheard at a Nudist Camp”, below***)
-LADBible
THINGS PEOPLE LEARN TOO LATE:
1. Everything is temporary
2. Life isn’t fair
3. Family matters more than friends
4. Others treat you the way you treat yourself
5. Beneath anger there’s always fear
6. Happiness is a choice and requires hard work
7. A lifetime isn’t as long as you think
8. The biggest risk is not taking any risk
9. Things don’t matter so much
10. You played it too safe
(Mine? When they say “grease the bottom of the pan”, they don’t REALLY mean the bottom!)
-iFunny, first published in BS in 2021
MOST EXPENSIVE NORTH AMERICAN CITIES TO LIVE IN:
According to a comparison of the average cost of 8 common necessities, items and services: a theater ticket, a restaurant meal, a bottle of water, a cappuccino, a gym membership, a transit ticket, and one month’s rent…
1. New York City, New York
2. Mississauga, Ontario
3. Vancouver, British Columbia
4. Hamilton, Ontario
5. Toronto, Ontario
6. Los Angeles, California
7. San Diego, California
8. Chicago, Illinois
9. Ottawa, Ontario
10. Montreal, Quebec
-CTV
DID YOU KNOW?
The world’s largest recorded freshwater fish has been caught in the Mekong River in Cambodia. The stingray, captured on June 13, measured almost 4 meters (13 feet) long and weighed slightly under 300 kg (660 pounds). The previous record for a freshwater fish was a 293 kg (646 pound) Mekong giant catfish, discovered in Thailand in 2005.
-Yahoo
BS CHRONOMETER 06.22.22
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Stupid Guy Thing Day”. Women are always saying, “Oh that’s just another stupid guy thing…”, so here’s the day to commemorate it! Women are encouraged to make a list of ‘Stupid Guy Things’ and pass it on. To get you started . . .
✓ Pounding things.
✓ Squirting things.
✓ Watching TV sports.
✓ Using power tools.
✓ Driving giant pickup trucks.
✓ Wearing ball caps … backwards.
✓ Burning and/or exploding things.
✓ Eating anything and everything.
✓ The Three Stooges
• “World Rainforest Day”, to help protect rainforests by raising awareness and encouraging action. Rainforests absorb carbon dioxide from human activity, produce oxygen, provide fresh water, provide a home for half of the world’s animal and plant species, are the source of medicines, and stabilize climate patterns.
• “Chocolate Eclair Day”, saluting the light, crisp pastry that’s filled with a custard or cream and topped with icing.
• “Onion Rings Day”, for those of us who like our holidays deep-fried.
• “National Kissing Day”, the perfect time to show someone how much they are loved, appreciated and adored. (I can’t see any problems coming out of this, can you?)
• “National HVAC Tech Day”, dedicated to all heating, ventilation, and air conditioning technicians (HVAC technicians). Why? They restore comfort to their customers, often working at all times of the day or night, and sometimes in extreme conditions. (And what a drag it must be when, after hours of fiddling with someone’s A/C on a sweltering day, you finally get it working, then off you go to the next overheated home…)
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Public Service Day
[Thurs] Pink Flamingo Day
[Fri] Take Your Dog to Work Day
[Fri] Food Truck Day
This Week is…National Roller Coaster Week
This Month is…Care for Your Grandparents Month
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [86] Kris Kristofferson, Brownsville TX, retired pop-country singer/songwriter (‘Me and Bobby McGee’, ‘Help Me Make It Through the Night’)/actor (“A Star is Born”, “Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid”)
1948 [74] Todd Rundgren, Philadelphia PA, rock singer-songwriter (‘I Saw the Light’, ‘Bang the Drum All Day’)/producer (Meat Loaf-“Bat Out of Hell”)
1949 [73] Meryl (Mary Louise) Streep, Summit NJ, movie actress (“The Iron Lady”, “Sophie’s Choice”, “Kramer vs Kramer”)/a record 21 Academy Award nominations & 3 Oscars
1952 [70] Graham Greene, Oshweken ON, movie actor (“Dances with Wolves”, “The Green Mile”)/TV actor (“The Red Green Shoe” 1994–2006)
1953 [69] Cyndi Lauper, Ozone Park NY, pop singer, (‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’, ‘Time After Time’)/Broadway composer (“Kinky Boots”)
1964 [58] Dan Brown, Exeter NH, author (“Angels & Demons”, “The Da Vinci Code” which sold over 60 million copies worldwide)
1964 [58] Amy Brenneman, New London CT, TV actress (“The Leftovers” 2014-17, “Private Practice” 2007-13, “Judging Amy” 1999-2005)
1970 [52] Steven Page, Scarborough ON, pop singer-guitarist (ex-Barenaked Ladies-‘One Week’, ‘The Big Bang Theory Theme’)/Canadian Music Hall of Fame, 2018
1973 [49] Carson Daly, Santa Monica CA, TV host (“The Voice” since 2011, “Today” since 2013, “Last Call With Carson Daly” 2002-19, “Total Request Live” 1998-2003)
1997 [25] Dinah Jane Hansen, Santa Ana CA, pop singer (Fifth Harmony-‘Work From Home’, ‘Worth It’)
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2008 [14] Comedian George Carlin dies of heart failure in Santa Monica CA at age 71 (***See today’s Random Joke, Deep Thought, below***)
2011 [11] Daniel Craig weds Rachel Weisz at a private ceremony in New York
2001 [21] “The Fast and the Furious,” directed by Rob Cohen, and starring Paul Walker, Vin Diesel and Michelle Rodriguez, premieres (spawns 8 sequels, with plans for 2 more…)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2002 [20] U2 guitarist The Edge weds his girlfriend of 10 years Morleigh Steinberg in Eze, France (they first met when she was a belly dancer on the band’s “Zoo TV” tour)
2020 [02] Twenty One Pilots release a never-ending video for the song ‘Level of Concern’. It continuously updates using footage uploaded by fans. It does finally end on December 16 — 178 days later
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2002 [20] Spaniard Alvaro de Marichalar becomes the first to cross the Atlantic Ocean by jet ski (12 hours per day on water, sleeping on a support boat), landing at Miami Beach 4 months after setting off from Rome, Italy
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ Cows give more milk when they listen to music.
✓ 55% of corporate “downsizings” take place on Tuesdays.
✓ Sleeping on your stomach can induce weird, scarier and sexier dreams.
✓ Al Capone played banjo in the Alcatraz prison band.
✓ The front of a giraffe’s tongue is dark purple to protect it from sunburn while eating.
✓ Annually, there are about 60,000 trampoline injuries in the US. And about 150 dustpan injuries.
-BathroomReadersInstitute, Parade
BS STUPID DIVORCE QUESTIONS:
• Do I need to ask for her father’s permission first?
• Can I get child support, even though we have no kids?
• I’m still your beneficiary, right?
• Is there a gift registry?
• Can I have the ring back?
• Can we still fight once in a while, for old times’ sake?
• Now that you’re my ex, are you moving to Texas?
• Does this have something to do with my other family?
• Who has to take the teenager?
• So, which one of us has to date Pete Davidson now?
-Twitter
Best of BS . . .
(***Caution***) BS THINGS OVERHEARD AT A NUDIST CAMP:
• “We’re looking for a few brave volunteers to fry bacon.”
• “Honey, stop being so clothes-minded.”
• “That’s a clever way to carry donuts.”
• “I thought they said there would be ‘skinny’ dipping.”
• “Getting a sunburn here takes it to a whole new level.”
• “Wow. If only you could iron skin.”
• “How’s it hangin’?”
• “Yes, I AM wearing the same outfit I wore yesterday.”
• “I thought you said we were going to a BUDDHIST camp!”
• “Look, you don’t understand. There was shrinkage!”
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
BS WOULD YOU RATHER?
(***You run down the list while your caller decides which choice is more palatable …***)
• Would you rather never be able to drink water again, or only be able to drink water?
• Would you rather only be able to use a fork, or only be able to use a spoon?
• Would you rather have edible spaghetti hair that regrows every night, or sweat maple syrup?
• Would you rather your only mode of transportation be a donkey or a giraffe?
• Would you rather have to read aloud every word you read, or sing everything you say out loud?
• Would you rather wear a wedding dress/tuxedo every single day, or wear a bathing suit every single day?
• Would you rather be unable to move your body every time it rains, or not be able to stop moving while the sun is out?
• Would you rather be compelled to high five everyone you meet, or be compelled to give a wedgie to anyone in a green shirt?
• Would you rather every shirt you ever wear be kind of itchy, or only be able to use 1-ply toilet paper?
-ConversationStarters
BS WEB GOODIE:
Just before he was banned (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/5xdkve78
BS RANDOM JOKE:
“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” (George Carlin)
BS PHONE STARTER:
What fun or interesting alternatives to war could countries use to settle their differences?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 17% of men say they have to get permission from their partner to do THIS. What is it?
Answer: Go grocery shopping
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
“Everyone smiles in the same language.” (George Carlin)