March 1, 2007

Thursday, March 1, 2007        Edition: #3478
This is Where March Comes In Like a Bull!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY the tell-all book “Secrets of a Hollywood Super Madam” by Jody ‘Babydol’ Gibson is published, which claims clients of her former call-girl service (1986-99) included actors Ben Affleck, Bruce Willis, Jim Belushi & Gary Busey, and former LA Dodgers manager Tom Lasorda, now 79-years-old  (no lawsuits so far, so you know what that means!) . . . TONIGHT the finalé of “Nashville Star 5” (USA/CMT Canada) features the finalists performing at Opryland (country singer Blake Shelton, who’s a judge, admits this show needs to generate an “American Idol”-style star to maintain any credibility) . . . The cast of “Grey’s Anatomy” is said to be fuming over the upcoming spin-off show featuring the ‘Dr Addison Montgomery’ character, and has reportedly been giving actress Kate Walsh the cold shoulder ever since the announcement (this show’s falling apart at the sutures) . . . The new HBO drama “True Blood” from producer Alan Ball (“Six Feet Under”) will feature Winnipeg-born actress Anna Paquin (“X-Men: The Last Stand”) playing a waitress able to read people’s minds who falls for the new vampire in town (based on the “Southern Vampire” books by Charlaine Harris) . . . In a new ranking, Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen remain the top-earning young stars in show biz ($20 million apiece, thanks to retail products), followed by “Harry Potter” actor Daniel Radcliffe ($13 million), and Lindsay Lohan ($6 million) . . . And David & Victoria Beckham have just been named the ‘World’s Most Environmentally Unfriendly Celebrity Couple’ by an environmental group (with 15 cars, 4 homes, and hundreds -of-thousands of miles of air travel annually, they have a ‘carbon footprint’ bigger than King Kong!).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• John Mayer – TONIGHT he’s on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).
• Korn – TONIGHT they play the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Madonna – She admits she’s been getting on daughter Lourdes’ case for wearing tight jeans that she considers too revealing. Hmm, look who just got old.
• The Police – They’ve sold out 16 of 16 dates announced so far on their upcoming reunion tour, as total ticket sales now approach 500,000.
• Rascal Flatts – They’ve become the first country act to have 2 songs surpass the 1 million paid-downloads mark. “What Hurts the Most” and “Life Is a Highway” both reached the milestone in the past 2 weeks.
• Rolling Stones – Mick Jagger’s Jagged Films is set to produce the movie “The Long Play”, a rock & roll epic to be directed by Oscar-winner Martin Scorsese.

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
A selection of movies in the making …
• “Confessions of Pain” – Leonardo DiCaprio will again collaborate with William Monahan, writer of Oscar-winning “The Departed”, for another Hong Kong crime-thriller remake. The story follows 2 close friends, a cop and a private detective, who team up to investigate a murder.
• “The Fantastic Mr Fox” – George Clooney is currently in talks to provide a voice for this stop-motion animated film adapted from the children’s book by Roald Dahl. Other roles will be voiced by Cate Blanchett (“Babel”) & Jason Schwartzman (“Marie Antoinette”). The 1st animated feature from director Wes Anderson (“The Royal Tenenbaums”) is due in theaters in 2008.
• “Sex & the City” – A script for a feature film version of the TV series that ended in 2004 is currently being written. Insiders say it could begin filming later THIS YEAR in NYC. Mario Cantone, who played ‘Charlotte’s wedding planner ‘Anthony’, has confirmed he has a role but no other cast members have been announced as yet.
• “Star Trek XI” – Trekkies are getting a special gift next Christmas. This feature film prequel, produced and directed by JJ Abrams (“Lost”, “Mission: Impossible III”), is now due to hit theaters on Christmas Day, 2008. Filming is slated to begin THIS FALL. A cast has yet to be announced but rumors say Matt Damon, Adrien Brody, and Gary Sinise are being approached to play the roles of ‘Captain Kirk’, ‘Dr Spock’, and ‘Dr McCoy’ respectively.
• “Truce” – Soccer star David Beckham has signed up for a role in this new WWI movie alongside Jason Statham and rocker-turned-Mr Gwen Stefani, Gavin Rossdale. The film is based on the true story of an unofficial peace at Christmastime 1914, when British and German soldiers called a brief truce … to play a game of soccer. The film’s due NEXT YEAR.

HOW TO HAVE A LESS STRESSFUL COMMUTE:
• Carpool – It’s been proven to lower stress levels, both by cutting down on total time behind-the-wheel and providing a built-in distraction.
• Car Exercises – Tense muscles while breathing in; then relax them while breathing out. Yoga deep breathing, which involves slowly filling the lungs with air, can also help.
• Drive in Style – Superficial but true: A luxury vehicle can reduce the stress of a daily commute.
• Drive Smart – On highways, stick with the far right lane. The fast lane tends to jam up first and have more accidents, and the right lane gives you quick access to an exit. On surface streets, however, stay in the fast lane to avoid buses, parked cars, and pedestrians.
• Mass Transit – Studies show that it’s far less stressful than driving. So why do we avoid it?
• Prepare Ahead – Take the time to check the Internet and radio traffic reports before you start your commute. Always have a map handy and know your alternate routes.
• Soothing Scents – Regularly smelling peppermint and cinnamon during the commute can decrease anxiety, fatigue and frustration. It can also enhance alertness.
• Roll With It – If someone cuts you off, don’t take it personally … let it go. Some psychologists recommend allowing other drivers 5 transgressions per trip before giving in to feeling angry. By then, you should have arrived!
– “Survive the Drive!” by David Rizzo.

FILLING PRESCRIPTIONS:
Forgetting to take your meds may become a thing of the past, thanks to a new artificial tooth that automatically releases pharmaceuticals. The ‘Intellidrug’, which hold tablets in a reservoir, is small enough to fit inside 2 artificial molars in the jaw. When the system is triggered by an electrical timing mechanism, a valve opens and allows a controlled amount of the drug into the mouth. It can hold enough medication for up to 2 weeks. The German developers believe it will also benefit patients who need to take doses overnight. If human trials prove successful, the device could be available in 2010. (Perfect for seniors who forget their ‘pills’ … and they have the room for a couple extra teeth!)
– BBC News

BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED:
Chinese researchers have successfully implanted electrodes in the brain of a pigeon in order to remotely control the bird’s flight. So far, the scientists at Shandong University of Science & Technology have been able to use the micro-electrodes to command the ‘Robo-Pigeon’ to fly right or left, and up or down. It’s the first experiment of its kind on a pigeon, though the same team managed to manipulate mice in experiments 2 years ago. Animal rights group PETA is unimpressed, saying animals should not be treated as remote-controlled toys.
– “Mainichi Daily News”

WORLD’S LARGEST SHOPPING MALLS:
Based on a new ranking of total leasable area ….
5. SM Megamall – Mandaluyong City, Philippines (3.6 million sq ft)
4. West Edmonton Mall – Edmonton, Alberta (3.8 million sq ft)
3. SM Mall of Asia – Pasay City, Philippines (4.2 million sq ft)
2. Golden Resources Shopping Mall – Beijing, China (6 million sq ft)
1. South China Mall – Dongguan, China (7.1 million sq ft)
(USA’s largest is King of Prussia Mall in Philadelphia PA at 2.8 million sq ft, ranked 10th.)
– “Forbes Magazine”

GENERATION EGO:
San Diego State University psychologist Jean Twenge says parental efforts to boost their kids’ self-esteem has resulted in a generation of narcissistic college-age students. In her just-released report, Twenge warns the over-inflated egos may also result in personal and social problems for the so-called ‘Millennial Generation’ (born 1977-1995), also known as ‘Gen Y’. Why? People with an inflated sense of self tend to have less interest in emotional bonds and often lash out when rejected or insulted. The study suggests part of the problem can be traced to self-esteem programs adopted by schools some 20 years ago. Other factors include overly permissive parenting, increased materialism, and the fascination with celebrities and reality TV shows.
– “Los Angeles Times”

BS LAW & DISORDER:
• In Switzerland, a good-looking con-man has had his mug published in a fake ad for Gucci perfume. He not only persuaded the newspaper “Sonntags-Zeitung” to run the full-page color spread featuring himself as the model, but also to … send the $50,000 bill directly to Gucci.
• In Italy, a 22-year-old Milan teacher has been fired after she allegedly used scissors to cut the tongue of a talkative student in order to get him to shut-up. Fortunately, the 7-year-old is okay after needing 5 stitches to close the wound.
• In Colorado, a 23-year-old mother has been arrested in Pueblo on suspicion of felony trafficking in children after she traded her own 5-month-old baby as … a down payment on a used Dodge Intrepid. Both she and the couple she made the swap with are being held in the slammer on a $50,000 bond.

DID YOU KNOW?
According to the Social Issues Research Center, two-thirds of all human conversation is gossip.

THE BULL SHEET 03.01.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944 [63] Roger Daltrey, London UK, classic rock singer (The Who-“Who Are You” [theme from “CSI”], “Won’t Get Fooled Again” [“CSI: Miami”], “Baba O’Riley” [“CSI: NY”])

1947 [60] Alan Thicke, Kirkland Lake ON, TV actor (“Growing Pains” 1985-92)

1954 [53] Ron Howard, Duncan OK, movie director (“The Da Vinci Code”, Oscar-“A Beautiful Mind”)/movie & TV producer (“Curious George”, “Arrested Development”)/former TV actor ( ‘Ritchie’-“Happy Days” 1974-84, ‘Opie’-“Andy Griffith Show” 1960-68)

1967 [40] George Eads, Fort Worth TX, TV actor (‘Nick Stokes’ on “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation” since 2000)

1973 [34] Ryan Peake, Brooks AB, rock guitarist (Nickelback-“Animals”, “Photograph”)

1978 [29] Jensen Ackles, Dallas TX, TV actor (‘Dean Winchester‘ on “Supernatural” since 2005, “Smallville” 2004-05)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chalanda Marz” in Switzerland, when they drive away winter by ringing bells and cracking whips. Let’s try that and see if it works! [SFX].

• “Peace Corps Day”, commemorating the 46th anniversary of the worldwide volunteer organization’s founding by President John F Kennedy.
NET: http://www.peacecorps.gov/index.cfm?shell=learn

• “Peanut Butter Lover’s Day”, a good day to have phone contestants try a tongue twister or whistling a tune with a mouthful of smooth or crunchy.

• “Pig Day”, honoring the ‘most intelligent and useful of domesticated animals’. Studies show pigs are much smarter than horses … but harder to ride.

• “RSP Deadline” if you want a deduction on your 2006 income tax. (So be sure to call your investment office this afternoon at about 4:59 pm … they’ll love you for it.)

• “Share a Smile Day”. If for no other reason, it’ll make everyone wonder what you’ve been up to!

• “St David’s Day” in Wales. The Welsh celebrate their patron saint by taking a leek … and wearing it.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1941 [66] 1st  commercial ‘FM radio station’ goes on-the-air (W47NV in Nashville TN, which must have had really complicated jingles)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1995 [12] Sheryl Crow wins ‘Record of the Year’ at the “Grammy Awards” for “All I Wanna Do”

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1937 [70] 1st ‘Automobile License Plates’ issued, in Connecticut

1969 [38] Prince Charles officially invested ‘Prince of Wales’ (starting to seem like it’s a lifetime appointment, isn’t it?)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1949 [58] Team Canada beats Denmark 47-0 in international hockey (them was the days!)

1993 [14] San Jose Sharks tie NHL record by losing 17th consecutive games (a 6-0 loss to Edmonton)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Fri] Salespersons Day
[Fri] 38th NAACP Image Awards
[Fri] “Black Snake Moan”; “Full of It”; “Wild Hogs”; “Zodiac” open in movie theaters
[Sat] Full ‘Worm’ Moon
[Sun] Chinese Lantern Festival
[Mon] Academy of Country Music Awards nominees announced (Nashville TN)
[Mon] Unique Names Day
This Week Is … Eating Disorders Awareness Week
This Month Is … Humorists Are Artists Month

BULL’S BITS

BS BOGUS CHARITIES:
Approximately 5.5 million Canadians donate over $5.8 billion annually to registered charities. It’s estimated that Americans give nearly $250 billion a year to charitable causes.Hopefully, none of these are included …
• Shave the Children
• The Make-A-Pasta-Dish Foundation
• The Damnation Army
• Totally Unplanned & Accidental Parenthood
• Adopt-A-Deposed-Afghan-Warlord
• Rock Stars For Birth Control
• World Cockfighting Appreciation League
• Billionaire Socialites For Swanky Benefit Dinner Parties
• Amnesty International House of Pancakes
• Society for the Methodical Elimination of Your Religion

ROADIE FOR A DAY:
A contest to tie in with a record company or concert promoter: Listeners register to qualify to be a stage hand/go-fer for a hot act that’s coming to your town. Pick a winner(s) and have them do regular updates on-air for a day ahead of time. Make sure they get autographs, tour shirts, etc.

BS RANDOM JOKES:
• I think animal testing is a terrible idea. They get all nervous and get the wrong answers.
• I am not a vegetarian because I love animals, I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

BS PHONE STARTERS:
• What really strange thing do you collect?
• In what grade should students begin having homework? (A Menlo Park CA elementary school principal has just banned it for his 1st-graders, claiming they’re way too young.)

ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 1ST-GRADER?
• In which country are Panama hats made? [Ecuador.]
• From which animal do we get catgut? [Sheep.]
• Where do Chinese gooseberries come from? [They’re fruits grown in New Zealand.]
• What kind of creatures were the Canary Islands named after? [A breed of large dogs. The Latin name was Canariae Insulae … ‘Islands of Dogs’.]
• What is a camel hair brush made of? [It is usually made of squirrel’s hair.]
• What color is a purple finch? [The distinctively colored parts are red.]
– “The People’s Almanac”

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: On average we do THIS 16 times a day, but less if kids are around.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Use swear words.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
He who hesitates is probably right.

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