Friday, March 24, 2023 – Edition: #7445

We Give a Sheet!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ ‘Barney Stinson’ is back. Neil Patrick Harris will be returning to Hulu’s “How I Met Your Father” for the series’ upcoming Season 2 midseason finale. Harris’ character also made a surprise return in the Season 2 premiere of the spinoff series. He is expected to play a pivotal role in the 2-episode midseason finale, which will stream on Hulu beginning Tuesday. Season 2 will continue with additional episodes beginning May 23. Harris played Barney for 9 seasons on HIMYM.
-Deadline
★ Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly are “on a break” and have hit the pause button on wedding planning, says a source. The troubled couple have been on the rocks since just before Super Bowl 2023 but “are still in contact,” according to a report from Us Weekly. An insider told the outlet that “They are very hot and cold,” but are working on their issues, and described their relationship as “currently off, but (they’re) still texting each other.”
-PageSix
★ Gunter Nezhoda, best known for appearing in “Storage Wars,” has died at age 67, following a battle with cancer. Nezhoda died in his sleep on Tuesday night after being diagnosed with lung cancer 6 months ago, his son Rene has confirmed. Rene said his father was diagnosed in September after being a smoker for over 30 years. Nezhoda appeared on 7 episodes of “Storage Wars” between 2015 and 2019, and was a noted rock bassist. He also recently filmed an episode for the show’s upcoming season.
-NYPost
★ Aaron Sorkin has revealed he suffered a life-changing stroke in November 2022. The “West Wing” creator told the New York Times that he realized he was grappling with a major health issue when he began “crashing into walls and corners.” Sorkin called the incident a “loud wake-up call,” adding that his doctor said his blood pressure was so high he was “supposed to be dead.” He said he thought he was “one of those people who could eat whatever he wanted, smoke as much as he wanted, and it’s not going to affect me. Boy, was I wrong.” He has since quit smoking and started exercising.
-PageSix
★ Wendi McLendon-Covey, who plays matriarch ‘Beverly Goldberg’ on the ABC sitcom “The Goldbergs,” said on “Andy Cohen Live” that the exit of former co-star Jeff Garlin was “a long time coming.” When Cohen asked how she felt about Garlin leaving after several complaints about his on-set behavior, she said, “That was a long time coming. And that it finally happened it was like, ‘OK, OK. Finally, someone is listening to us.’” When the show returned for its 10th and final season in September, Garlin’s character ‘Murray’ was revealed to have died after the events of Season 9. The series finale airs May 3.
-TheWrap
★ Dana Carvey is down for “Wayne’s World 3” if Mike Myers is. While attending last weekend’s “Mark Twain Prize” gala honouring Adam Sandler in Washington, he was asked if a third film in the series might finally be on the horizon. His answer: “Yes, it is. I don’t know. Maybe we’ll do it in puppets. I’m not sure.” He continued: “I’m always game. Love Mike Myers. Just a brilliant guy.” Last month, Carvey had fans speculating about a possible “Wayne’s World 3”, after he shared a photo of him and Myers in costume and in a recreation of the classic basement set.
-ETCanada

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Kieran Culkin, Method Man, Jimin
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Regé-Jean Page, Skylar Astin, Liam Neeson (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Woody Harrelson, Niall Horan, Atom Willard (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Anna Kendrick, Michael Urie, Fabrizio Copano (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Billy Porter
• “The Talk” (CBS): Tracey Bregman, Christian Le Blanc, Katee Sackhoff, guest co-host Victor Cruz
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Brian Cox, Toni Collette
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Jay Hernandez, Derek Hough (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Theresa Caputo, Mario Cantone
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Tamar Braxton, the Isley Brothers
• “Lopez vs Lopez” (NBC): When a veterinarian takes an interest in Mayan, she worries she’s destined to repeat the Lopez legacy of cheating, dating back to her Aztec ancestors.
• “2023 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament” (CBS, TSN): Among the games today, #5 Miami vs. #1 Houston; #2 Texas Longhorns vs. #3 Xavier Musketeers
SATURDAY-
• “Figure Skating World Championships (NBC): Live from Saitama, Japan
• “Say Yes to the Dress” (TLC): Red already bought a just-in-case dress, but she doesn’t want to settle; Randy gets a blast from the past; bride Shatava gets a taste of her own medicine.
• “A Picture of Her” (Hall): After becoming the subject of an award-winning magazine cover, a woman seeks to uncover the true identity of the photographer who snapped the photo.
SUNDAY-
• “American Idol” (ABC): Hopefuls audition in New Orleans, Las Vegas, and Nashville.
• “The Suicide Squad” (TNT): The most dangerous supervillains in the world are sent to the enemy-infused island of Corto Maltese on a search-and-destroy mission.
• “24th Mark Twain Prize for American Humor” (CNN): Celebrating Adam Sandler, with special guests Jennifer Aniston, Judd Apatow, Drew Barrymore, Steve Buscemi, Conan O’Brien, Chris Rock, and more.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Ed Sheeran — Now that he has completed his cycle of 5 albums titled after mathematical symbols, he has 5 more in mind, based on another set of (still-secret) symbols. And the final one will be released posthumously. He plans to add songs “here and there” and make it “perfect”, “And just have it in my will that after I die, it comes out.”
• Tekashi 6ix9ine — was brutally beaten by a group of men inside the bathroom of a Florida gym Tuesday. The 26-year-old musician and ex-con was rushed to the hospital. He once faced decades in prison, but took a plea deal that involved testifying against his former gang associates.
• Miley Cyrus — took to Twitter to celebrate ‘Flowers’ returning to the top of the Billboard Hot 100. Sharing a candid shot of herself, she wrote: “Flowers is #1 for a 7th week! I love all of you. Endless Summer Vacation out now!” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2zk59hv7
• Kiss – Longtime manager Doc McGhee has announced that the band’s upcoming biopic “Shout It Out Loud” will be released next year on Netflix. He indicated that production has just gotten underway.
• Devo – The band best known for the 1980 hit ‘Whip It’, is getting the documentary treatment. Chris Smith, who handled “Tiger King” and Netflix’s “Fyre Fest” doc, will direct. No release date yet.
• John Fogerty – April 13, he’ll be honored with the “Music For Life” award at the 2023 NAMM Show in Anaheim CA, “in recognition of Fogerty’s lifelong contributions to music and commitment to inspiring music makers everywhere.” Kenny Loggins was given the honor last year.
• Brothers Osborne — John Osborne and Lucie Silvas officially have a family of 4! He posted that they welcomed their first babies together — son Arthur and daughter Maybelle— one minute apart on Tuesday in Nashville. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yrupdvyk
• Miranda Lambert — has unveiled a brand-new cookbook, “Y’all Eat Yet?” She also dropped a video introducing the women of the “Pretty B*tchin’ Kitchen” and shared some of the book’s recipes. Examples: Nonny’s Banana Pudding, Dutch Oven (Coffee Can) Campfire Cobbler, Whiskey Cupcakes, and The LOAF, a.k.a. “the meal that will get the ring”. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5sx8zvj4
• Marty Stuart – has dropped the single ‘Sitting Alone’, from his first studio album in 6 years, “Altitude”, out May 19. Although the song was written years ago, Stuart said he had a listen after the pandemic started, and thought: “This makes a lot more sense to me than it used to”. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/ybvzwxhf

SHOOTING THE BULL

THIS WEEK’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “John Wick: Chapter 4” (R, Action): John Wick uncovers a path to defeating The High Table. But before he can earn his freedom, he must face off against a new enemy with powerful alliances — and forces that turn old friends into foes. (Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Bill Skarsgård) Tomatometer: 94%
• “The Lost King” (PG-13, Comedy-Drama):  The true story of an amateur historian who believes she has found the lost burial site of King Richard III. She takes on Britain’s most eminent historians, forcing them to rethink the legacy of one of the most controversial rulers in English history. (Sally Hawkins, Shonagh Price, Harry Lloyd) Tomatometer: 74%

WEEKEND GOALS:
⇒ Heinz is adding some spirit to mealtimes — by launching a creamy pasta sauce — with a shot of vodka. Scientists at the food giant teamed up with Absolut to create jars of tomato, basil, cheese and vodka, available now at UK supermarkets. They took their inspiration from supermodel Gigi Hadid, who posted a recipe for her favourite spicy pasta sauce to her followers in 2020, which soon became one of the trendiest recipes on TikTok and Instagram. Chefs say vodka “unlocks the flavors” and intensifies the aroma of tomato, basil and cheese sauce. (Is this what they mean when they say you’re “on the sauce”?)
⇒ A European brewery says it has created “powdered beer”. Neuzeller Klosterbräu claims to have revolutionized the way carbonated beverages are made by concocting a powdered lager that mimics the look of beer on tap, just by adding water. The company says you’d make beer in the same way one would make instant coffee or a protein shake. By simply adding a couple of spoons of powder into a glass, adding water and giving it a stir, beer enthusiasts can make their favorite drink without having to open the fridge. The development is intended to help reduce the heavy carbon footprint beer exports generate. (Not to mention reduce footprints in the kitchen, apparently!)
⇒ Science has finally answered the all-important question of whether beer tastes better from a can or a bottle. And the answer is – it depends. The flavor of beer starts to change as soon as it is packaged and stored. Reactions break down flavor compounds and form others, which contributes to the aging or ‘stale beer’ taste people get when they open a drink. Now, researchers at Colorado State University have found that amber ale is fresher when drunk out of a bottle, whereas the flavor of an India Pale Ale (IPA) does not change when it’s consumed out of a can. (It’s the weekend – if you ask me, a funnel is definitely the way to go!)
-TheTimes, News.Au, StudyFinds

NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ Two inmates in a Virginia jail used primitively made tools to make a hole in the wall of their cell and escape — only to be found hours later at an IHOP restaurant. The Newport News Sheriff’s Office says the 2 men were discovered missing during a head count Monday night, and an investigation found they had used tools made from a toothbrush and a metal object to tunnel out. The escapees were taken into custody early Tuesday at an IHOP in the next town 7 miles away when other patrons called police. Sheriff Gabe Morgan remarked: “It reinforces what we always say, ‘See something, say something.’” (I’m surprised they were even able to find 2 toothbrushes in Virginia!)
➢ A driver from New York state who was caught going nearly double the speed limit in Ontario told police they “didn’t realize” speed signs weren’t posted in miles per hour. Ontario Provincial Police say the driver was pulled over Niagara Falls, about a 10-minute drive from the border crossing. The speed limit in the area is 80 kilometres per hour, and the 52-year-old driver was allegedly caught going 142 kilometres per hour. But police aren’t buying his “I didn’t know Canada is metric” excuse…because if you convert 142 [kilometres per hour] to mph, “he was still going 90 miles an hour.” (Actually, for him, it’s about a THREE minute drive from the border…)
-City, CTV

DID YOU KNOW?
A British designer has created a $2,500 pair of boots in the form of a Teletubby. Christian Cowan’s latest footwear are an homage to ‘Dipsy’, the bright green character from the 90s children’s show. The New York-based designer, who is known for his celeb clients including Lady Gaga, Naomi Campbell and Beyoncé, recently posted a photo of the boots on Instagram, writing, “No caption necessary.” Also available: A denim jacket emblazoned with ‘Po’, for $595, a hoodie featuring ‘Laa-Laa’, going for $395, a white T-shirt emblazoned with an image of ‘Tinky Winky’ for $195, and a pair of wide-leg jeans showing ‘Dipsy’ – for just $495. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/y5pjm66e
-SWNS, NYPost

BS CHRONOMETER 03.24.23

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chocolate Covered Raisins Day”, celebrating the treat that lives in the hearts of theatergoers the world over, and masquerades as a healthy addition to trail mix. (We’re not celebrating the kind you find in your kid’s bunny cage…)
• “National Cheesesteak Day”, if you’ve never had one, you should know that you can really only get an authentic one in Philadelphia. Other places try, but Philly is the real deal. The roll is filled with chipped steak, and you can order it with or without cheese and onions.
• “National Cocktail Day”,  cocktails are drinks typically comprised of wine or a distilled beverage (such as whiskey, brandy, vodka, rum, or tequila) and mixed with other tasty ingredients such as cream, soda, liqueurs, fruit, juices, honey, beer, etc. (and if you don’t drink, celebrate the movie instead!)
• “International Day for Achievers”, honoring those who have achieved something in any field. It is a day to recognize those who have set goals and displayed determination and confidence on their journey to achieve them. (What’s YOUR greatest achievement? BESIDES your kids?)
• “World Tuberculosis Day”, to build public awareness that TB remains an epidemic in much of the world, causing the deaths of about 1.6 million each year, mostly in Third World nations.

SATURDAY-
• “Earth Hour”, an effort initiated by the World Wide Fund to raise awareness of the need to reduce energy consumption. Show support by turning off your lights for 1 hour at 8:30pm. For a list of 7 ways you can spend the Hour with friends, family, and community – virtually or in-person, go to: https://www.earthhour.org/
• “International Waffle Day” (“Vaffeldagen”), a holiday that originated in Sweden to coincide with the Christian “Feast of the Annunciation”. It was also considered the start of Spring, so it became a custom for Swedish families to celebrate both events by making waffles.
• “Old New Year’s Day”, although the Gregorian calendar was created in 1582, many countries chose to ignore it for several hundred years. Instead, they used “Annunciation Style dating,” which recognized the Feast of the Annunciation (March 25) as New Year’s Day.
• “Pecan Day”, an annual salute to the only nut tree native to North America. The word comes from Algonquian language, meaning a nut requiring a stone to crack. The proper pronunciation is ‘peh-CAHN’ not ‘PEE-can’.
• “Brothers and Sisters Day”, a day to let siblings know you care. (Or maybe to add up all the times you got ratted on, had your hair pulled or your dessert stolen … and get even!)
• “Tolkien Reading Day”, an annual event launched by the Tolkien Society in 2003, with the aim of encouraging reading of the works of JRR Tolkien. March 25 was chosen to honor the date of the fall of ‘Sauron’ in “Lord of the Rings”.
• “International Day of Remembrance of the Victims of Slavery & The Transatlantic Slave Trade”. For over 400 years, more than 15 million men, women and children were the victims of the transatlantic slave trade, one of the darkest chapters in human history. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2p99cx39
• “National Lobster Newburg Day”, an American seafood dish made with lobster, butter, cream, cognac, sherry, eggs and cayenne pepper. It is an elegant and classic dish enjoyed by many since the late 1800s.

SUNDAY-
• “Make Up Your Own Holiday Day”. What ingredients make for a good holiday? Special foods? Parades? Costumes? Fireworks? Religious obligations? A day off from the sweatbox? (Leprechauns?)
• “Legal Assistants Day”, honoring all those who help lawyers with their briefs.
• “Purple Day”, to raise awareness of epilepsy by wearing purple or lavender. The idea is to dispel myths about the condition by getting people talking, and to reassure those with seizures that they are not alone. LINK:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purple_Day
• “Spinach Day”, Packed with nutrients like Iron, Vitamin A and Calcium, spinach is a healthy part of a balanced diet, and not just for Popeye! (What is this? The Spinach Inquisition?)
• “Nougat Day”. A mixture of honey, sugar, nuts and more, it is soft, chewy, a little sticky, and filled with utter honey-nut deliciousness. Nougat comes from the Old Provencal French word, “nogat” which simply means “nut cake”.
• “Solitude Day”, A little isolation can do wonders for your mental health. Here are a few benefits to spending some time alone: It helps to clear your head, spark creativity, increase productivity, and can help improve your relationships with others (which is why my wife often makes me sit in the corner!)

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1951 [72] Tommy Hilfiger, Elmira NY, fashion designer (“Tommy Hilfiger”, “Tommy Girl”)

1960 [63] Nena (Gabrielle Kerner), Hagen West Germany, pop singer (‘99 Luftballons’, ‘99 Red Balloons’)

1970 [53] Lara Flynn Boyle, Davenport IA, TV actress (‘Donna Hayward’ in “Twin Peaks” 1990-91, “The Practice” 1997-2003)/movie actress (“Wayne’s World”, “Men in Black II”)

1973 [50] Jim Parsons, Houston TX, TV actor (‘Sheldon Cooper’ on “The Big Bang Theory” 2007-19)/movie actor (“The Boys in the Band”)

1974 [49] Alyson Hannigan, Washington DC, TV actress (‘Lily Aldrin’ on “How I Met Your Mother” 2005-14, “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” 1997-2003)/movie actress (“American Pie” movies)

1976 [47] Peyton Manning, New Orleans LA, retired NFL QB (Indianapolis Colts 1998-2011, Denver Broncos 2012-15)/2 Super Bowls with 2 teams)/5-time MVP/14-time Pro Bowl selection

1977 [46] Jessica Chastain, Sacramento CA, movie actress (“The Eyes of Tammy Faye, “Zero Dark Thirty”) COMING UP… “Mother’s Instinct”

1978 [45] Amir Arison, St Louis MO, TV actor (‘Aram Mojtabai’ on “The Blacklist” 2013-23, “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” 2009-11)

1986 [37] [Valentin] ‘Val’ Chmerkovskiy, Odesa Ukraine, pro dancer (“Dancing with the Stars” 2011-21)

SATURDAY-
Paul Michael Glaser (“Starsky and Hutch”) is 80; [Sir] Elton John (‘Crocodile Rock’) is 76; Sarah Jessica Parker (“Sex & The City”) is 58; retired Indy driver Danica Patrick is 41; Katharine McPhee (“American Idol”) is 39; “Big” Sean [Anderson] (‘Bounce Back’) is 35; Ryan Lewis (‘Thrift Shop’) is 35

SUNDAY- Alan Arkin (“Little Miss Sunshine”) is 89; Diana Ross (The Supremes) is 79; Steven Tyler (Aerosmith) is 75; Martin Short (“SCTV”) is 73; Jennifer Grey (“Dirty Dancing”) is 63; Kenny Chesney (‘No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems’) is 55; Leslie Mann (“This is 40″) is 51; Google co-founder Larry Page is 50; Keira Knightley (“Pirates of the Caribbean”) is 38

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2002 [21] Halle Berry (“Monster’s Ball”) & Denzel Washington (“Training Day”) take home the top acting Oscars at the Academy Awards. Berry becomes the only Black woman to have won the award

2005 [18] The US version of “The Office,” created by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, starring Steve Carell and John Krasinski, premieres on NBC

2016 [07] Comedian, actor, screenwriter Garry Shandling (“The Larry Sanders Show”) dies at age 66

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2001 [22] The part of Highway 19 running through Macon GA is renamed “Duane Allman Boulevard”, in remembrance of the Allman Brothers guitarist, who died in a motorcycle crash nearby, 3 decades earlier

2005 [18] After Carrie Underwood performs ‘Alone’ on “American Idol”, Simon Cowell predicts she’ll win the competition and sell more records than any previous winner. He’s right: She eventually surpasses Kelly Clarkson to become the best-selling alum of the show

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2019 [04] 2-time American League MVP Mike Trout signs the biggest contract in North American sports history, a $426.5 million, 12-year extension with the LA Angels (still the largest baseball contract)

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ In a day, your brain uses the amount of energy contained in 2 large bananas.
✓ A day on Venus is longer than its year.
✓ An elephant’s tooth can weigh as much as 12 pounds (5.4kg).
✓ A study found that judges are more lenient after lunch.
✓ Approximately one-third of people can’t snap their fingers.
✓ Oxford University discovered if someone prods one of your middle toes while your eyes are shut, most people can’t tell which toe is being touched.
-RandomFactGenerator, BathroomReadersInstitute

Best of BS . . .
BS FAKE RAP FACTS:
• Busta Rhymes and LeAnn Rimes are twins who were separated at birth.
• Christmas rap songs are known as Gift Rap.
• All rappers see Dr. Dre for antibiotics.
• Eminem prefers Reese’s Pieces.
• It still works if you only push it ‘kind of’ good.
• You must be at least 16 to receive a license to ill.
• Tupac had a brother named Threepac
• Jay-Z really only has about 82 problems.
• Before earning the name Grandmaster Flash, he progressed through the rankings of Apprentice Flash, Journeyman Flash, and Master Flash.
• Lincoln’s rapper name was 1 cent.
• When you wave your hands in the air, it shows you actually do care.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ It’s Spring and you sure can tell. (Daisy Dukes. Tank tops. No bras. But enough about Uncle Frank…)
➠ A survey found that 59% of people say they’re not ready for bathing suit season. (Unfortunately, the other 41% believe they are!)
➠ 48% of kids in the U.S. are born to unwed mothers. (And that’s just Kate Gosselin, the Octomom and whomever Nick Cannon is sleeping with…)
➠ Peyton Manning is 47 today. (To celebrate, he threw a birthday party — which was promptly intercepted by the Seahawks…)
➠ A study finds that men are most physically fit at age 27. (Good thing, too. They need to be able to outrun Madonna!)

BS WEB GOODIE:
Uneasy like Sunday morning (sound up):   https://tinyurl.com/4kmstfue

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Just because I give advice, it doesn’t mean I’m smart…it just means that I’ve done more stupid stuff!

BS PHONE STARTER:
In what place are you not welcome anymore? And why?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  Chances are, you will do THIS more than 18,000 times in your lifetime. What is it?
Answer:  Exceed the speed limit

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting some on yourself.