March 22, 2016

Tuesday, March 22, 2016        Edition: #5652


Have Another Sheetload!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Kristen Bell is set to start work on the highly-anticipated “Frozen” sequel within days. The actress, who voices ‘Princess Anna’, has revealed that production on the animated follow-up is set to start much sooner than initially thought, with Kristen expecting to hit the studio to begin recording vocals later this month. Idina Menzel, who voices ‘Queen Elsa’, and Josh Gad, who plays snowman ‘Olaf’, are also set to reprise their roles for “Frozen 2”. Bell reveals the cast members have yet to work on any music for the sequel, as they’ve been kept busy recording material for the various “Frozen”-themed Disney rides around-the-world.
– Collider.com
★ Drew Barrymore & Timothy Olyphant are getting married … for a new TV comedy. They’re playing married real estate agents in a new Netflix series entitled “Santa Clarita Diet”, which is due to debut in 2017. Olyphant starred in the FX TV series “Justified” from 2010-15. Barrymore last appeared in the 2015 movie “Miss You Already”. Barrymore and Olyphant are also producing the new single-camera show.
– WENN.com
★ And Ben Affleck has confirmed his much-ballyhooed back tattoo of a phoenix rising from the ashes is … fake. The actor was photographed with the colorful full-back design in December on the Los Angeles CA set of his new movie “Live by Night”, in which he both stars and directs. The ink drew much criticism from fans online, and even two of his exes, Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner. Now Affleck, who has a number of other, smaller inkings, has revealed the massive bird was just for a movie. “They get sort of addictive, tattoos, after a while,” he admits.
– “Extra”

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Ty Segall (“Emotional Mugger”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Granger Smith (“Remington”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Empress Of (“Me”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Justin Bieber (“Purpose”). Rerun.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Iggy Azalea (“Digital Distortion”, coming in June).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – Battle rounds continue.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – Her baby’s ultrasound photo is among a number of personal snaps stolen by a hacker and posted online. The 27-year-old singer is reportedly furious at the major security breach, which occurred after her boyfriend Simon Konecki’s email was apparently hacked.
• Backstreet Boys – Nick Carter has written and stars a new zombie film called “Dead 7” that co-stars other former boy-band members from Backstreet Boys, 98 Degrees, *NSYNC, and O-Town. The 2-hour straight-to-TV movie  appropriately airs April 1st on SyFy network.
• The Beatles – A rare early recording goes on sale via Omega Auctions in Warrington, England today and is expected to sell for upwards of $14,000. The 1962 record, featuring the songs “Till There Was You” and “Hello Little Girl”, was the last the band cut before rising to international fame. It was found languishing in the attic of Les Maguire, keyboardist for Gerry & The Pacemakers.
• Coldplay – Opening up about the breakdown of his marriage to Gwyneth Paltrow for the first time publicly, Chris Martin admits to Britain’s “Sunday Times” that he fell into a dark place afterward. Quote: “I still wake up down a lot of days. But now I feel like I’ve been given the tools to turn it around.”
• Joey + Rory – “Hymns” is #1 on today’s new ‘Billboard Top Country Albums’ chart, and holds down the #4 slot on the all-genre ‘Billboard 200′. It was released about 3 weeks before the death of Joey Feek from cancer.
• Paul McCartney – He’s filed paperwork in an attempt to re-acquire his half of the publishing rights for The Beatles’ back catalogue. Lennon-McCartney lost their rights in 1969 when their publishing company was sold to ATV, which was eventually bought by Michael Jackson for $47.5 million in 1985. Last week it was sold to Sony for $750 million.
• Prince – So much mystery and controversy still surrounds his music and persona, and now fans will finally be treated with a tell-all book next year. His memoirs, entitled “The Beautiful Ones”, will be his first book.
• Smashing Pumpkins – Tonight they hit the road on a Spring acoustic tour. Billy Corgan will be backed by Jimmy Chamberlin and Jeff Schroeder for the “In Plainsong” trek, which kicks off in Portland OR and wraps up April 20th in Houston TX. Liz Phair is opening all dates.

THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES:
Out today on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
• “Daddy’s Home” ( PG-13 Comedy ): A mild-mannered radio executive strives to become the best step-dad to his wife’s two children, but complications ensue when their freewheeling and freeloading real father arrives, forcing him to compete for the affection of the kids. Stars Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg, Linda Cardellini, Thomas Haden Church.
• “The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2” ( PG-13 Sci-Fi Adventure ): ‘Katniss Everdeen’ (Jennifer Lawrence), reluctant leader of the rebellion, must bring together an army against ‘President Snow’ as the future hangs in the balance. Co-stars Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Woody Harrelson. Also out: “The Hunger Games Complete 4-Film Collection”.
• Also released today: “Freaks and Geeks: The Complete Series Collector’s Edition” (Vintage TV); “Maude: Season 4 1975-76” (Vintage TV); “Noma: My Perfect Storm” (Documentary); “Perry Mason Movie Collection: Volume 5” (Vintage TV Compilation); “The Royals: Season 2” (TV); and “Turn: Washington’s Spies – The Complete 2nd Season” (TV).

BAD HABITS THAT ARE HOLDING YOU BACK IN LIFE:
According to performance consultant Erik Bertrand Larssen …
✗ Multitasking – When you balance multiple activities, the results are worse and they usually take longer to complete.
✗ Digital Distraction – This is a spinoff of multitasking, but the effects can be so destructive (think distracted driving) that it becomes its own bad habit.
✗ Oversleeping – Besides the potential loss in productivity, this habit sets the wrong tone for the entire day.
✗ Inactivity – Regular exercise not only promotes physical health, it gives you energy.
✗ Risk Aversion – Not taking the chance on a career change, for example, but also being unable to confront your partner with something you’d like to change in your relationship.
– “Daily News”

UNIVERSAL TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE:
• You will never find anybody anywhere who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we have Daylight Saving Time.
• You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
• The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
• The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe we are above-average drivers.
• If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings’.
• You should not confuse your career with your life.
• No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
• Nobody cares if you can’t dance. Just get up and dance.
– GoodReads.com

HOW LONG DOES A VAMPIRE TAKE?
If you’ve ever wondered how much time you’d have if a vampire should find your carotid artery and begin to guzzle, students at the UK’s University of Leicester have worked up an analysis using fluid dynamics and a few interesting assumptions to arrive at an average time of … 6.4 minutes. That’s how long it would take your average vampire to drain your average human of 15% of his or her blood. The premise is that vampires aren’t out to kill but just drink and run (hence draining just 15% of the average human’s 5 liters of blood). Any more than that and your heart rate slows, making blood-sucking a process of diminishing return. The calculations are based on vampire fangs leaving puncture holes roughly 0.5 mm each. (Tough curriculum at this school, huh?)
– Gizmodo.com

TITILLATING TITLES:
Since 1978, Britain’s “Diagram Prize” for ‘Oddest Book Title’ has been given to the year’s most peculiarly named work. The shortlist for this year’s 38th annual honor included …
• “Reading from Behind: A Cultural History Of the Anus”
• “Transvestite Vampire Biker Nuns from Outer Space: A Consideration of Cult Film”
• “Soviet Bus Stops”
• “Paper Folding with Children”
• “Behind the Binoculars: Interviews with Acclaimed Birdwatchers”
And the winner is … “Too Naked For the Nazis”, a biography of a musical hall troupe. Author Alan Stafford admits the title has attracted more attention than the book itself. He does not win a cash prize, but instead receives ‘a free bottle of plonk’. (Odds are he was into one when he thought up the title.)
– BBC Entertainment & Arts

HOW TO BE A QUITTER:
‘Cold turkey’ is the best way to quit smoking, a new Oxford University study says. Volunteers who used this approach are 25% more likely to remain abstinent 6 months from the date they give up puffing than smokers who try to gradually wean themselves off instead. Researchers say picking a convenient date to quit is important. Make a promise, set a date, and stick to it, they advise. And sticking to the ‘not a single drag’ rule can really help too. It’s also advised you see a doctor to get professional support and advice. Even though more people in the study said they prefer the idea of quitting gradually, individuals were still more likely to stop for good in the cold turkey group. (And your best tip is …?)
– “The Independant”

HERE COMES THE POOCH:
Tips for having your dog included in your wedding ceremony …
• If you plan to have your dog actually carry the rings, be sure he is securely leashed at all times so he doesn’t bolt with the bands.
• Have the animal walked thoroughly beforehand. There is more than one incident on record of a dog answering nature’s call … right in the middle of the ceremony.
– “Dogs, Dogs, Dogs!”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Around 3 million shipwrecks are resting on the ocean’s floor. (Seriously? Who counted?)
– “Discovery Magazine”

BS CHRONOMETER 03.22.16


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1931 [85] William Shatner, Montréal QC, TV actor (“Boston Legal” 2004-08, “Star Trek” 1966-69)/movie actor (“Miss Congeniality”, “Dodgeball”)

1948 [68] (Sir) Andrew Lloyd Webber, London UK, music composer/stage producer (Tony Awards for “Phantom Of the Opera” and “Cats”, Tony & Academy Awards for “Evita”)

1948 [68] Wolf Blitzer, Augsberg, Germany, CNN news anchor since 1990 (“The Situation Room”)

1952 [64] Bob Costas, Queens NY, NBC-TV sports anchor since 1980 (“Football Night in America”, Olympic Games)/multiple Emmy Award-winner/’Best Toupée on TV’?

1976 [40] Reese Witherspoon, New Orleans LA, movie actress (“Wild”, Oscar-“Walk the Line”)

1982 [34] Constance Wu, Richmond VA, TV actress (‘Jessica Huang’ on “Fresh Off the Boat” since 2015)

1990 [26] Lincoln Parish, Bowling Green KY, rock guitarist (Cage The Elephant-“Shake Me Down”, “In One Ear”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “As Young As You Feel Day”, a day to quit wallowing in worry about your chronological age and start feeling peppy!

• “International Goof-Off Day”, a day to relax, be yourself, and generally just goof off. In other words … a regular day.

• “Sing-Out Day”, a day to let fly with a special tune to let someone know how you feel.

• “World Water Day”, a UN observance since 1992 emphasizing the worldwide necessity of potable drinking water and proper wastewater treatment.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1976 [40] Filmmaker George Lucas begins filming the first of 9 planned movies in his “Star Wars” epic (mercifully he stops after 6, but then later sells the franchise to Disney)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2006 [10] Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler’s upcoming throat surgery forces the band to cancel a North American tour, sparking rumors he’s battling throat cancer (he’s not)

2009 [07] Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face” becomes a #1 hit in over 20 countries

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1997 [19] America’s Tara Lipinski becomes ‘Youngest Women’s World Figure Skating Champion’ at age 14 years, 10 months

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Puppy Day
[Wed] Tamale Day
[Wed] World Meteorological Day
[Thurs] Purim (Jewish)
[Fri] Good Friday (Christian)
This Week Is … Bubble Blowers Week
This Month Is … Caffeine Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS


BS SIGNS YOU’VE BEEN WATCHING WAY TOO MUCH COLLEGE BASKETBALL:
• The last 5 minutes of everything you do takes a half-hour.
• Every time you get up from the couch, you pull a groin muscle.
• You’ve already called in sick for 5 different days … in advance.
• Your fingernails are gnawed so short your wrists are bleeding.
• Your girlfriends are now seeded 1-through-16.
• After sex, you slam dunk your pillow.
• You’re an overweight, middle-aged, white man living vicariously through your team.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and the ones you’d like to avoid just never go away.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
The first edible Easter bunnies were made where?
a. Switzerland.
b. Germany. [CORRECT, in the 19th century.]
c. USA.

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What job would you pay to do?

BS WEB GOODIE:
“Behind the Name” is a nifty site that offers several functions …
• Look up the origin of tens-of-thousands of given names.
• Look up the most popular names by country.
• Use a ‘Random Name Generator’ in a variety of languages and categories.
NET: http://www.behindthename.com

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 1-in-5 drivers will experience THIS today.
Answer: A dashboard warning light.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Things too stupid to be spoken are often sung.

Leave a comment