March 31, 2017

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Friday, March 31, 2017 – Edition: #5944

Monthly Planning Calendar in Today’s Issue!

It’s been a pleasure to serve the broadcast community in Canada, the USA, and around-the-world since April 1, 1993. Now it’s time to move on. Next week “The Bull Sheet” begins its 25th year under new ownership, with the same mission of providing timely, succinct, and useable material for on-air personalities. Thank you all for your patronage over the years.
– Clif

★ PBS-TV stalwart Ken Burns is set to explore the career of the late boxing great Muhammad Ali in a new 2-part, 4-hour documentary. The as-yet-untitled film also chronicles the former heavyweight champ’s conversion to Islam, and refusal to enrol in the US Army. The documentary is expected to air on PBS in 2021. (Only PBS would give a guy 4 years to produce 4 hours of programming.)
– Bang Showbiz
★ “Parks & Rec” vets Amy Poehler and Nick Offerman are reuniting for a new NBC-TV reality series. They’re co-hosting and executive-producing “The Handmade Project”, a 6-episode reality competition that showcases artisans who create amazing things with their hands. Contestants compete in various disciplines such as woodwork, quilting, knitting, scrapbooking, cake decorating, metal work, doll-making, and general crafting. (It’s come to this? Knitting on TV?)
★ And wannabe interior designers will be thrilled to know that “Trading Spaces”, the show that started the make-over TV craze is making a comeback. The show which aired 2000-08 is also TLC’s most successful and most iconic series of all-time. It featured a rotating cast of designers with big personalities and wacky ideas. It’s confirmed that the reboot will premiere some time in 2018, but no further details have been offered. (Will perky Paige Davis return as host? Eye-candy Ty Pennington as carpenter?)
– AV Club

• “ACM Awards” (CBS) – Sunday Luke Bryan & Dierks Bentley host the 52nd Academy of Country Music Awards from the T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas. Keith Urban leads nominations with 7, followed by Maren Morris and Miranda Lambert with 6 apiece. Performers include Jason Aldean, Florida Georgia Line w/Backstreet Boys, Lady Antebellum, and Little Big Town.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Imagine Dragons perform “Believer” from their TBA new album. Rerun.
• “Juno Awards” (CTV) – Sunday comedian Russell Peters and classic rocker Bryan Adams co-host the annual Canadian music awards from Ottawa ON. Drake, Shawn Mendes, and The Weeknd lead nominees with 5 apiece. The late Leonard Cohen is in the running for 4 awards. Sarah McLachlan is inducted into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame. Performers include Alessia Cara, The Arkells, and A Tribe Called Red.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Appleseed Cast (“Illumination Ritual”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Tonight New Kids On the Block’s Joey McIntyre.
• Lollapalooza Argentina/Chile – Tonight & tomorrow in Buenos Aires/Saturday-Sunday in Santiago. Both lineups are topped by Metallica, The Strokes, The Weeknd. and The Chainsmokers, with a number of other acts on each bill.
• “Marilyn Denis Show” (CTV/CTV2) – Today Florida Georgia Line (“Dig Your Roots”).
• “NCAA Final Four” (CBS): The 4 remaining teams in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament battle Saturday in Phoenix AZ, with the 2 survivors competing for the championship Monday night. The American Gaming Association estimates that, in total, around $10.4 billion has been wagered during ‘March Madness’, only $295 million of that bet legally.
• “NCAA March Madness Music Festival” (Phoenix AZ) – The free, 3-day celebration at Margaret T Hance Park includes: Aerosmith, Blink-182, Capital Cities, The Chainsmokers, Grouplove, Keith Urban, and Macklemore & Ryan Lewis among others.
• “13 Reasons Why” (Netflix) – Debut today. Selena Gomez is the executive producer behind this new series based on the novel of the same name by Jay Asher. The project tells the tale of a teen girl’s suicide and how her peers influenced her sad decision.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Ed Sheeran (“Divide”).
• “The Walking Dead” (AMC) – Sunday the 7th season finalé.
• “Wendy Williams” (syndicated) – Today Mack Wilds (“Love In the 90z”).
• WrestleMania 33 (Orlando FL) – Sunday Big E, Kofi Kingston, and Xavier Woods host the biggest WWE event of the year. Pitbull performs his newest single “Options” with Stephen Marley, before being joined by Flo Rida and LunchMoney Lewis to perform “GreenLight”.

• Beyoncé – Today Queen Bey’s one-time vocal coach David Lee Brewer is releasing the tell-all tome, “Beyonce: Raising Genius”.
• Bob Dylan – Today he releases his first ever triple-album, appropriately titled “Triplicate”. The 3-disc set features 30 covers of classic American songs.
• Chris Brown – Tonight in Baltimore MD, his “Party Tour” with 50 Cent, Fabolous, and others begins. It winds up May 23rd in Los Angeles CA.
• Ed Sheeran – Even though the 26-year-old is in a happy 2-year relationship with Cherry Seaborn, he says he won’t consider becoming a dad until his touring days are over.
• Nelly Furtado – Today the 38-year-old singer-songwriter releases her new album “The Ride”.
She tells “Cosmopolitan” she was “broken” and ”really empty” before writing the new project.
• Selena Gomez – She’s confirmed she’s been back in the studio working on new music after taking time away from the industry to deal with ”anxiety, panic attacks, and depression”.
• Trace Adkins – Today he releases his 12th studio album, “Something’s Going On”. Adkins is planning to tour behind the release.

• “The Boss Baby” ( PG Animated Family Comedy ): In the latest from DreamWorks Animation, a suit-wearing, briefcase-carrying baby pairs up with his 7-year-old brother to stop the dastardly plot of the CEO of Puppy Co. Voice cast includes Miles Christopher Bakshi, Alec Baldwin, Jimmy Kimmel, Lisa Kudrow, and Steve Buscemi.
• “Ghost In the Shell” ( PG-13 Sci-Fi Thriller ): A woman saved from a terrible crash is cyber-enhanced to become a perfect soldier devoted to stopping dangerous criminals. When terrorists develop the ability to hack into people’s minds and control them, she is called upon to stop it. Stars Scarlett Johansson, Pilou Asbæk, Takeshi Kitano, and Juliette Binoche.
• “The Zookeeper’s Wife” ( PG-13 Biographical Drama ): The real-life story of husband-and-wife Antonina & Jan Zabinski, the keepers of the Warsaw Zoo, who helped save hundreds of people and animals during the German invasion of Poland in WW2. Stars Jessica Chastain, Johan Heldenbergh. Based on the book of the same name by Diane Ackerman.
• Opening in limited release: “Cezanne and I” (Biographical Drama).

• George Clooney’s dad Nick was a game show host on “The Money Maze”.
• Jack Black’s parents were rocket scientists, satellite engineers to be precise.
• Sandra Bullock’s mom, Helga Mathilde Meyer, was an opera singer.
• Michael Buble’s dad was a commercial salmon fisherman in British Columbia.
• Kanye West’s dad was a Black Panther in the ’60s and ’70s.
• Julianne Moore’s dad was a helicopter pilot and paratrooper during the Vietnam War.
• Amy Adams’ mom was a semi-professional bodybuilder.

Sapiosexual is the latest ‘it’ word on dating sites. It’s defined as a gender-less term that refers to those who are sexually attracted to intelligent people. It’s being used online to also denote emotional maturity and open-mindedness, not just a person’s IQ. While it isn’t new, it’s become a common declaration on dating apps, alongside a user’s other vitals. There’s even a new app devoted specifically to the concept. ‘Sapio’ is a new dating app launched this year that’s designed for those who are “sick of superficial hookup apps”. It claims to have signed up 50,000 new users in the past month, mostly in North America. (Not surprisingly some are calling this term pretentious.)

The world’s spider population is estimated to weigh a staggering 29 million tons. Spiders could theoretically eat every human on Earth in 1 year … and still be hungry. (Maybe THEY are the aliens?)
– “National Post”


1943 [74] Christopher Walken, Queens NY, movie actor (Oscar-“The Deer Hunter”)/TV actor (“Peter Pan”)

1955 [62] Angus Young, Glasgow, Scotland, short-panted rock guitarist (AC/DC-“Moneytalks”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2003)

1971 [46] Ewan McGregor, Crieff, Scotland, movie actor (“Trainspotting 2”)

1971 [46] Bob Crawford, Memphis TN, folk-rock bassist (Avett Bros-“Morning Song”)

1983 [34] 40 (Noah Shebib), Toronto ON, hip-hop producer (Drake, Lil Wayne, Beyoncé, Alicia Keys, Jamie Foxx)/co-founder of Drake’s October’s Very Own (OVO) label

1984 [33] Jack Antonoff, Bergenfield NJ, indie rock guitarist (fun.-“Some Nights”, Bleachers-“I Wanna Get Better”)

Rapper-actor Method Man (Wu-Tang Clan) is 46; MSNBC host Rachel Maddow (“The Rachel Maddow Show”) is 44; Movie actor David Oyelowo (“Selma”) is 41; Country singer Hillary Scott (Lady Antebellum) is 31.

SUNDAY . . .
TV actress Linda Hunt (“NCIS: Los Angeles”) is 72; Movie actor Michael Fassbender (“Steve Jobs”) is 40; Pop keyboardist Jesse Carmichael (Maroon 5) is 38.

• “Farm Workers Day”, encouraging us to thank agricultural laborers for their role in growing what we eat.
• “International Transgender Day of Visibility”, an annual observance celebrating transgender people and raising awareness of the discrimination faced by them worldwide.
• “She’s Funny That Way Day”, paying tribute to the female funny bone. How do the women in your life make you laugh? Ask for quirky things that funny ladies do.
• “Sleep Apnea Awareness Day”, drawing attention to the disorder characterized by pauses in breathing or instances of shallow or infrequent breathing during sleep.

• “April Fool’s Day”. Many say the custom of playing practical jokes on this day originated with the reform of the calendar when “New Year’s Day” was moved from April 1 to January 1. Those who clung to the old “New Year’s Day” were scoffed at as ‘fools’ and sent fake party invitations and prank gifts. That tradition began in France around 1564.
• “International Pillow Fight Day”, when massive pillow fights are scheduled in cities worldwide from Amsterdam to Zurich. A listing of cities hosting events here …
• “St Stupid’s Day”, an annual celebration on April 1st in San Francisco CA since 1980, when a wacky parade is held.

• “Ferret Day”, celebrating those cute and cuddly little pets that are the domesticated form of the European polecat, a mammal belonging to the weasel genus.
• “International Children’s Book Day”, celebrated on the birthday of one of the most famous children’s authors, Hans Christian Andersen, born in Denmark on this day in 1805.
• “Love Your Produce Manager Day”, a day to appreciate the person who orders and stocks fresh fruits and vegetables at groceries and supermarkets.
• “Peanut Butter & Jelly Day”, celebrating what may be the world’s most popular sandwich. But what else have you sandwiched with peanut butter? We like PB & tuna. Nummers!
• “World Autism Day”, a UN observance since 2007 to raise awareness that this disorder of neural development that’s estimated to affect 1-in-150 children worldwide.

2008 [09] U2 join Madonna and sign a huge contract with Live Nation (Bono & company get a boatload of stock that they’d later sell off)

2016 [01] Michael Stipe (REM), Cyndi Lauper, Ann Wilson (Heart), and Perry Farrell (Jane’s Addiction) are among performers at NYC’s Carnegie Hall in a concert honoring David Bowie

2007 [10] 2.2 million people take part in the 1st “Earth Hour” in Sydney, Australia

[Apr 3] Don’t Go to Work Unless It’s Fun Day / Find a Rainbow Day / Tater Day / Sow the Seeds of Greatness Day
[Apr 4] International Day for Mine Awareness / Sexual Assault Awareness Day of Action / World Rat Day
[Apr 5] “Prison Break” Season 5 debut (FOX) / Deep Dish Pizza Day / Read a Road Map Day / Immigration Lawyers Day of Action / Walking Day / Whole Grain Sampling Day
[Apr 6] Drowsy Driver Awareness Day / Hostess Twinkie Day / International Day of Sport for Development & Peace / Alcohol Screening Day / Student Athlete Day / Tartan Day
[Apr 7] “Smurfs: The Lost Village”; “Wonder” open in movie theaters / Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Inductions (Brooklyn NY) / Hospital Admitting Clerks Day / International Beaver Day / Metric System Day / Beer Day / Walk to Work Day / No Housework Day
[Apr 8] Baby Massage Day / International Roma Day / Dog Fighting Awareness Day / Take Your Parents to the Playground Day / Slow Art Day
[Apr 9] Global Day to End Child Sexual Abuse / Cherish an Antique Day / Prisoner of War Recognition Day
[Apr 10] SPCA Day / Farm Animals Day / Siblings Day
[Apr 11] Barbershop Quartet Day / Pet Day / World Parkinson’s Disease Day / Be Kind to Lawyers Day / Library Workers Day
[Apr 12] Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day / International Day for Street Children / Licorice Day
[Apr 13] Scrabble Day / Celebrate Teen Literature Day
[Apr 14] “Gifted”; “The Fate Of the Furious”; “Spark: A Space Tail” open in movie theaters / Coachella Festival begins (Indio CA) / Good Friday (Christian) / Children with Alopecia Day / International Moment of Laughter Day / Dolphin Day / Ex-Spouse Day / Pecan Day
[Apr 15] Take a Wild Guess Day / That Sucks Day / Record Store Day / World Art Day / Auctioneers Day / Husband Appreciation Day
[Apr 16] Easter (Christian) / Healthcare Decisions Day / Orchid Day / Save the Elephant Day
[Apr 17] Bat Appreciation Day / Boston Marathon / Dyngus Day / IRS Tax Pay Day (USA)
[Apr 18] Adult Autism Day / World Amateur Radio Day / Golf Day / Lineman Appreciation Day / Stress Awareness Day / Wear Your Pajamas to Work Day / Pet Owners Independence Day
[Apr 19] Bicycle Day / Garlic Day / Hanging Out Day
[Apr 20] Cheddar Fries Day / Pot Smokers Day / High Five Day
[Apr 21] “The Lost City of Z”; “Unforgettable”; “The War With Grandpa” open in movie theaters / “Bill Nye Saves The World” debuts (Netflix) / Bulldogs are Beautiful Day / Kindergarten Day / LGBT Day of Silence / Queen Elizabeth II’s Birthday
[Apr 22] Earth Day / Jelly Bean Day
[Apr 23] Lost Dog Awareness Day / Movie Theatre Day / Talk Like Shakespeare Day / World Book & Copyright Day
[Apr 24] Armenian Genocide Remembrance Day / International Sauvignon Blanc Day / World Meningitis Day
[Apr 25] Hairstylists Appreciation Day / International Marconi Day / Mani-Pedi Day / Malaria Awareness Day / Red Hat Society Day / World Penguin Day
[Apr 26] Hug an Australian Day / International Guide Dogs Day / Lesbian Visibility Day / Help a Horse Day / Kids & Pets Day / Pretzel Day / World Intellectual Property Day / Administrative Professionals Day
[Apr 27] Denim Day / Little Pampered Dog Day / Take Our Daughters & Sons to Work Day (USA)
[Apr 28] “The Circle”; “How to Be a Latin Lover” open in movie theater / New Orleans Jazz & Heritage Festival begins / Stagecoach Festival begins (Indio CA) / Hairball Awareness Day / Teach Your Children to Save Day / Workers Memorial Day
[Apr 29] “Not the White House Correspondents’ Dinner” (TBS) / Day of Remembrance for Victims of Chemical Warfare / International Dance Day / Go Birding Day / Sense of Smell Day / Save the Frogs Day / World Day for Lab Animals / World Tai Chi Day / World Veterinary Day
[Apr 30] Adopt A Shelter Pet Day / International Jazz Day / Pet Parents Day / Spank Out Day


• “I don’t have anything to wear” – The effort of sorting through my walk-in closet isn’t worth it.
• “I’m waiting for my Uber” – I have just stepped out of the shower and haven’t called one yet.
• “Crazy traffic” – I’ll text again in 20 minutes to say I’ve given up and turned around to go home.
• “I just woke up” – This event meant so little to me I didn’t bother to set an alarm.
• “My car got towed” – By me, to a better event with free booze, food, and people who’ll sleep with me.
• “My cousin came to town unexpectedly” – My ex just called me and wants to hook up.
• “I’m sick” – Netflix just released a new original series.
• “I have bronchitis” – I feel myself falling into a 24-hour Netflix coma, sorry not sorry.
– Thanks to Charles Jensen

Whose real name is Ella Maria Lani Yelich-O’Connor?
a. Kesha
b. Lorde [CORRECT]
c. Adele
– “Real Names of Famous Musicians”

Sleep is death without the responsibility.

☎ ‘Fess up … what’s your odd middle name that you don’t like to tell anyone?

Question: More than 1-in-10 of all the motorcycles on Earth have THIS in common.
Answer: They’re located in California.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

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