Friday, March 22, 2024 – Edition: #7683
Have Another Sheetload!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
The Bull Sheet will not be publishing on Friday, March 29th, to observe Good Friday. All subscribers will receive credit for the non-service day. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Monday, April 1st.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Conor McGregor says his role in the new “Road House” reboot (which debuted yesterday on Amazon Prime) is just the beginning. When asked about his future show biz aspirations, the UFC superstar said “of course” he’s planning to keep pursuing his new career. While it’s unclear exactly what’s next for the 35-year-old, when he was asked if he has more roles lined up, he quickly responded: “For sure, for sure!” As for how his first job in the industry went, early reviews for the Road House reimagining are positive, and there are no doubts that McGregor knows how to kick butt on command, and on cam. He’s also keeping up with his day job — training for an upcoming bout with Michael Chandler.
-TMZ
★ Larsa Pippen is “done” with Marcus Jordan, ET is reporting. The “Real Housewives of Miami” star has officially ended her relationship with Jordan, her boyfriend of nearly 2 years, after a brief reconciliation earlier this year. ET quotes a source as saying: “She wants to move on and focus on improving her life. They simply want different things.” Despite the split, the source adds that the relationship ended amicably, leaving open the possibility of maintaining a friendship in the future.
-ET
★ Sharon Stone says she’ll only return to Hollywood if she’s offered a really good part, after swapping acting for painting. The 66-year-old “Basic Instinct” star walked away from her movie career to focus on her love of art instead, but admitted she would happily return to the big screen if the right role came up. She told the Guardian newspaper that she “absolutely loved” working as an actress, and “If someone offers me a substantial role, I’m going to take it. But that’s not happening …”
-Bang!
★ “Downton Abbey” is getting a “final” chapter, according to Imelda Staunton. The actress, who played Queen Mary’s lady-in-waiting ‘Lady Maud Bagshaw’ in the first 2 films, confirmed reports that a third movie is in the works, telling BBC Radio 2: “There will be the final film – there you go.” Staunton’s comments followed a report by The Sun that claimed the third movie will film at Highclere Castle over the summer and premiere next year. It also indicated that Paul Giamatti could reprise his role as ‘Harold Levinson’, the brother of the Countess of Grantham, after he appeared in the 2013 Christmas special.
-Deadline
★ Margot Robbie is reportedly set to produce “The Sims” movie. She runs LuckyChap Entertainment with her husband Tom Acklery, and following the success of the summer smash “Barbie”, in which Robbie also starred, her company will now oversee the production of the upcoming movie based on the hit video game. We don’t have much more in the way of details, but the first iteration of “The Sims” game was launched for PC in 2000 and has gone on to release 4 main games in which players control a virtual doll-house, with fully customizable characters.
-Bang!
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): TBA
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Alicia Keys, Tony Goldwyn, Maleah Joi Moon, a performance from “Hell’s Kitchen”
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Rebecca Ferguson, Denis Villeneuve (R)
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Taylor Ortega, Jon Gabrus, Megan Gailey (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): James Corden, Devery Jacobs, Nico Carney, Colleen Clark (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Chelsea Clinton
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Lukas Gage, chef Eric Ripert
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Gary Clark Jr., Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): New York firefighters Darren Grant & Marc Anderson, Molly Baz
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Phil Keoghan, Lisa Rinna
• “90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? (TLC): Jasmine keeps a secret from Gino; Mahmoud prepares to leave everything; Emily’s American ways might be at odds with Kobe’s African family.
• “America’s Backyard Gold” (DSC): The historic Dahlonega Gold Belt is the Deep South’s best-kept secret among miners; Dave showcases everyday miners using backyard ingenuity to find riches.
• “2024 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament” (Check local listings): First Round: Vermont vs. Duke; James Madison vs. Wisconsin, plus other games
SATURDAY-
• “2024 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament” (Check local listings): Second Round: Teams TBA
• “2024 World Figure Skating Championships” (NBC, CBC) Men’s Free Skate from the Bell Centre in Montreal
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Ayo Edebiri; Jennifer Lopez performs (R)
SUNDAY-
• “American Idol” (ABC): The final round of auditions.
• “CSI: Vegas” CBS): When a mechanic is found murdered in a dark factory, the CSI team investigates whether the perpetrator was human or a humanoid robot with an AI operating system.
• “2024 Juno Awards” (CBC) The 53rd annual salute to Canadian musical artists, hosted by Nelly Furtado. Performers include Furtado, The Beaches, Charlotte Cardin, Josh Ross, Jeremy Dutcher and Elisapie, Karan Aujla, and TALK; Tributes to Gordon Lightfoot and Robbie Robertson.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Ariana Grande – Her 98-year-old grandmother, Marjorie Grande, has made history. With Grande’s ‘Ordinary Things’ debuting at #55 on the Billboard Hot 100, ‘Nonna’ is the oldest person ever to have appeared on the Hot 100 since its 1958 origin. Granny is billed as a featured artist. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5n8w9su3
• Taylor Swift — Fans are buzzing about a possible collab between her and Beyoncé. In an Instagram post this week, Bey said: “I have a few surprises on the album, and have collaborated with some brilliant artists who I deeply respect.” Of course, many people immediately wondered if Swift could be one of those artists, given that she began in country music before pivoting to pop. (So…not Willie?)
• Disturbed – A remix of their 2015 cover of ‘The Sound of Silence’ by Australian DJ/producer Cyril Riley has landed at #34 on Billboard’s Hot Dance/Electronic Songs chart. A month ago, the same version of the tune reached the Dance/Electronic Digital Song Sales chart, and it has since risen to #3 on that list.
• Guns N’ Roses – Their debut album “Appetite for Destruction” is one of 10 recordings which were inducted into the Grammy Hall of Fame on Wednesday. Also honored were: Lauryn Hill’s “Miseducation of Lauryn Hill”, and recordings by the Doobie Brothers, De La Soul, Buena Vista Social Club, Donna Summer, Charley Pride, Wanda Jackson, Kid Ory’s Creole Orchestra and William Bell.
• Wang Chung and Men Without Hats – have announced the spring “Abducted by the 80s” US tour, with, The Motels and Naked Eyes. It begins May 17 in Kyle TX, and runs through June 23 in Fort Lauderdale FL. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/45uvj3xv
• Brothers Osborne – will drop their new “Break Mine” EP today, but they’ve already given fans a preview of the title cut. The Brothers wrote on X of the midtempo love song: “We’re very proud of this project and we couldn’t be more excited for ya’ll to finally hear it. Let’s goooo!” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/36ewmt2m
• Beyoncé — Maren Morris is showing her support as the pop icon prepares to release her country album “Cowboy Carter”. This week, Bey indicated the recording was “born out of an experience that I had years ago where I did not feel welcomed” in the country genre. Morris was among the many commenters applauding Beyoncé, writing: “Drag them, Queen” in the comments section. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5n7tpddr
• Jimmie Allen — took to Instagram to reveal he has welcomed twins with another woman amid his divorce from Alexis Gale. He shared pics of himself alongside all 6 of his kids, writing: “I have 6 kids. I love each one of them. I refuse to let anyone make me feel ashamed of any of my children.” Gale responded on her own Insta, saying in a video, “Those lies will always catch up to you.”
SHOOTING THE BULL
NEW MOVIES THIS WEEK:
• “Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire” (PG-13, Adventure/Comedy): When the discovery of an ancient artifact unleashes an evil force, Ghostbusters new and old must join forces to protect their home and save the world from a second ice age. (Paul Rudd, Mckenna Grace, Carrie Coon) Tomatometer: 47%
• “Immaculate” (R, Horror): Cecilia is welcomed into a seemingly idyllic Italian convent. But when she learns she is also miraculously with child, she becomes a central figure in something dark and sinister. (Sydney Sweeney, Simona Tabasco, Álvaro Morte) Tomatometer: 76%
• “Luca” (PG, Animation/Adventure/Comedy, Re-release): On the Italian Riviera, an unlikely but strong friendship grows between a human being and a sea monster disguised as a human. (Jacob Trembley, Jack Dylan Grazer, Emma Berman) Tomatometer: 91%, Audience: 85%
• “Road House” (R, Action/Thriller, Amazon Prime only, premiered Thursday): Ex-UFC fighter Dalton takes a job as a bouncer at a Florida Keys roadhouse, only to discover that this paradise is not all it seems. (Jake Gyllenhaal, Daniela Melchior, Conor McGregor) Tomatometer: 68%
WHITE LIGHT DISTRICT:
If you’re one of those drivers who experiences an anxious moment of “should I stay or should I go” when you come upon an amber traffic light, then you’ll be interested in this. Traffic experts at North Carolina State University say that it would be a good idea to add a 4th, white-colored traffic signal to the classic red-yellow-green pattern. Why? Well, for a number of reasons. After conducting a number of tests, the study authors say that adding a 4th white light to traffic signals would shorten wait times for pedestrians, and improve traffic flow for cars. The 4th traffic signal, called a “white phase”, would take advantage of increasingly popular autonomous vehicles’ ability to communicate wirelessly with each other, and the computers in control of traffic signals. When enough AVs approach an intersection, this would activate the white light. The white lights tell human drivers to simply follow the car in front of them, signaling that AVs are coordinating their movement to facilitate efficient traffic flow through the intersection.
(Maybe the main problem with driving in traffic today is that we all tend to “simply follow the car in front”, no matter what the lights are telling us!)
(…and at night, the white lights will signal that there’s a motorcycle HEADED RIGHT FOR ME!)
-StudyFinds
HAPPIEST COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD:
The 2024 World Happiness Report is out, and once again Nordic countries are coming out on top. The #1 country, Finland, has now held onto its top ranking for 7 years straight. The report draws on global survey data from people in more than 140 countries. Here are the world’s top-20 happiest countries . . .
1. Finland
2. Denmark
3. Iceland
4. Sweden
5. Israel
6. Netherlands
7. Norway
8. Luxembourg
9. Switzerland
10. Australia
11. New Zealand
12. Costa Rica
13. Kuwait
14. Austria
15. Canada
16. Belgium
17. Ireland
18. Czechia
19. Lithuania
20. United Kingdom
[Other BS countries in the top 100: UAE (21), USA (22), Singapore (30), Thailand (58), Malaysia (59), South Africa (83), Hong Kong (86)]
-CNN, WorldHappinessReport
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ An upstate New York man was forced to say “see you later, alligator” to his unusual pet after authorities seized the 11-foot (3.4m), 750-pound (340kg) gator from his Hamburg NY home. Police said: “The owner of the home had built an addition to his house and installed an in-ground swimming pool for his roughly 30-year-old alligator, and allegedly allowed members of the public to get into the water to pet the unsecured alligator,” including children. The owner’s license to keep the alligator expired in 2021, and cops took action after learning the “extent at which the owner was seriously endangering the public,” according to a statement. The gator, named Albert, is now being cared for by a “licenced caretaker”. (Who presumably WON’T be feeding local children to it!)
➢ A mullet-sporting motorcyclist whose license plate reads “WILL RUN” led police on a wild high-speed chase through several Florida cities, reaching a top speed of 145mph (233kph) — for the second time in a week. Aerial footage of the Tuesday incident shows the biker recklessly weaving in and out of highway traffic, blowing through red lights at crowded intersections and taunting the police officers on his tail. The high-speed chase kicked off when patrol officers tried to pull over 19-year-old Ashtin Jarvis after recognizing his unique plate. Cops had tried to pull him over days earlier, but the biker allegedly fled. He is facing multiple charges. (But Florida being Florida, ‘driving while mulleted’ is NOT one of them…!)
-Canoe, CNN, NYPost
DID YOU KNOW?
(***Caution – preview for content***) Researchers in South Korea have uncovered a surprising connection between a woman’s hair length and her…uh…love life. The hair-raising study, published in the academic journal Evolutionary Psychology, determined that women with long hair are seen as more attractive to men, and, perhaps logically, they also have more sex. In the conclusion of their study of 204 married heterosexual couples, the researchers said their findings indicate “that women’s hair may, indeed, work to convey an evolutionary message to the opposite sex.” No correlation was found between a man’s mane and his sex life. (Great news for us cue-ball heads!)
-NYPost
BS CHRONOMETER 03.22.24
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “As Young As You Feel Day”. Celebrate by sporting that outrageous hairstyle you wanted when you were a teenager, or dig out those clothes you wore when you were young. (If you have teen, you’ll shock THEM for a change!)
• “International Goof-Off Day”, a day to relax, be yourself, and generally just goof off. (In other words, … a regular day…)
• “Sing-Out Day”, a day to let fly with a special tune to let someone know how you feel. (This is also celebrated in May, so be warned: You may have to hear me sing twice!)
• “World Water Day”, a UN observance since 1992, emphasizing the worldwide necessity of potable drinking water and proper wastewater treatment.
• “Bavarian Crêpes Day”. Crêpes are a delicious, very thin pancake-like dessert, typically made from wheat flour or buckwheat flour, then filled, rolled and then often topped with a glaze, fruit, chocolate or whipped cream. In Bavaria, crêpes are called ‘palatschinke’.
• “Gryffindor Pride Day”, Gryffindor is one of the 4 houses of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in the ‘Harry Potter’ novels and films. Celebrated by fans, Gryffindor Pride Day is part of “Hogwarts House Pride Week”.
• “International Day of the Seal”, bringing attention to the cruelty of hunting these animals and the fact that we may be contributing to their extinction. Seals are related to sea lions and walrus, and their babies are called pups. Most live in Antarctica and the Arctic Circle.
• “Broccoli Day”, just in case you haven’t “caught wind” of the occasion already!
SATURDAY-
• “Chip & Dip Day”. While North Americans might pick ‘Sour Cream & Onion’ or ‘Salt & Vinegar’ chips, the top flavors for ‘crisps’ in the UK include ‘Roast Beef & Mustard’ and ‘Smoked Ham & Pickle’. The Swiss like ‘Paprika’, while Thais choose ‘Prawn’, and in Egypt ‘Kebab’ is popular. The best dip? ‘Hot Bean with Jalapenos’ … or is it?
• “OK Day”. Also spelled “O-K-A-Y”, this frequently-used word is very versatile. It can be used as an adjective, a verb, an adverb, and as an interjection. It is believed to have first been used in the 1830s as a slang word, short for “oll korrect,” which was a misspelling of “all correct.”
• “Puppy Day”, the idea is to save 10,000 homeless puppies in a single day by encouraging adoptions at dog pounds and rescue centers. LINK: http://nationalpuppyday.com
• “Cuddly Kitten Day”, whether you are a cat person or dog person, today serves as a reminder to pamper your pet. Cuddle and snuggle with your beloved, furry friend. Shower him or her with extra love, a few extra treats or a brand-new toy.
• “Take Your Parents to the Playground Day”, falling annually on the weekend prior to Easter, it coincides with “Children & Nature Awareness Month”, to call attention to the importance of providing opportunities for all children to experience frequent, regular play in natural outdoor settings. (Parents too – so put the phones away!)
• “World Meteorological Day”, an annual UN observance to promote understanding of how weather, climate, and water affect us all. For one thing, it seems to be our favorite topic of conversation. (What overused weather clichés should be dumped?)
SUNDAY-
• “Palm Sunday”, the beginning of Holy Week, taking place on the Sunday before Easter. It commemorates the Christian belief of Jesus’ entry into Jerusalem and the last days of his life.
• “Chocolate Covered Raisins Day” … but not the kind you find in your kid’s bunny cage.
• “World Tuberculosis Day”, to build public awareness that TB remains an epidemic in much of the world, causing the deaths of about 1.6 million each year, mostly in Third World nations.
• “Cocktail Day” Cocktails are drinks typically comprised of wine or a distilled beverage (such as whiskey, brandy, vodka, rum, or tequila) and mixed with other tasty ingredients such as cream, soda, liqueurs, fruit, juices, honey, beer, etc. (and if you don’t drink, celebrate the movie instead!)
• “National Cheesesteak Day”, if you’ve never had one, you should know that you can really only get an authentic one in Philadelphia. Other places try, but Philly is the real deal. The roll is filled with chipped steak, and you can order it with or without cheese and onions.
• “International Day for Achievers”, honoring those who have achieved something in any field. It is a day to recognize those who have set goals and displayed determination and confidence on their journey to achieve them. (What’s YOUR greatest achievement? BESIDES your kids?)
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1931 [93] William Shatner, Montréal QC, TV actor (“Boston Legal” 2004-08, “Star Trek” 1966-69)/movie actor (“Malevolent”, “Miss Congeniality”, “Star Trek” movies)/in 2021, at age 90, he became the oldest to fly to space, aboard a Blue Origin capsule. COMING UP… “The Elevator”
1948 [76] (Sir) Andrew Lloyd Webber, London England, music composer/stage producer (Tony Awards for “Phantom of the Opera” and “Cats”, Tony & Academy Awards for “Evita”)
1948 [76] Wolf Blitzer, Augsberg Germany, TV host (“The Situation Room” since 2005, “Wolf” 2014-18)/CNN anchor-reporter since 1990
1952 [72] Bob Costas, Queens NY, sportscaster (NBC-TV sports anchor 1980-2019, including on NFL, Major League Baseball and Olympics)/29-time Emmy Award-winner/currently with MLB Network, CNN and TBS
1971 [53] Keegan-Michael Key, Southfield MI, comedian/TV actor (“Key and Peele” 2012-2015, “SuperMansion” 2015-2017)/movie actor (“Wonka”)
1972 [52] Elvis Stojko, Newmarket ON, retired figure skater (3-time World champion, 2-time Olympic silver medalist, 7-time Canadian champ)
1975 [49] Cole Hauser, Santa Barbara CA, TV actor (‘Rip Wheeler’ on “Yellowstone” since 2018)/movie actor (“Dazed and Confused”, “2 Fast 2 Furious”)
1976 [48] (Laura) Reese Witherspoon, New Orleans LA, movie actress (“Legally Blonde”, Oscar-“Walk the Line”)/TV actress (“The Morning Show” since 2019) COMING UP… “You’re Cordially Invited”
1982 [42] Constance Wu, Richmond VA, TV actress (‘Jessica Huang’ on “Fresh Off the Boat” 2015-20)/movie actress (“Crazy Rich Asians”) COMING UP… “The Friend”
SATURDAY- Damon Albarn (Blur) is 56; Reggie Watts (“The Late Late Show With James Corden” bandleader) is 52; Randall Park (“Fresh off the Boat”) is 50; Keri Russell (“The Americans”) is 48; Michelle Monaghan (“Kiss Kiss Bang Bang”) is 48; Blogger Perez Hilton is 46; Brett Eldredge (‘Don’t Ya’) is 38
SUNDAY- Fashion designer Tommy Hilfiger is 73; Jim Parsons (“The Big Bang Theory”) is 51; Alyson Hannigan (“How I Met Your Mother”) is 50; Peyton Manning (former NFL QB) is 48; Jessica Chastain (“The Eyes of Tammy Faye”) is 47
ON THIS DATE . . .
2016 [08] The controversial but entertaining, crack-smoking former mayor of Toronto, Ontario, Rob Ford, dies of cancer at age 46
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003 [21] Britney Spears’ girl-power flick “Crossroads” earns 8 nominations at the 23rd Golden Raspberry Awards for the year’s worst movies (she co-wins ‘Worst Actress’ with Madonna for her role in “Swept Away”)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2009 [15] Lady Gaga’s ‘Poker Face’ becomes a #1 hit in over 20 countries
2013 [11] My Chemical Romance announces their breakup after 12 years. They reunite in 2019, and are still together
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1997 [27] USA’s Tara Lipinski becomes the ‘Youngest Women’s World Figure Skating Champion’ at age 14 years, 10 months
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The chicken is the closest living relative to the T-Rex.
✓ Dragonflies have 6 legs – but they can’t walk.
✓ The earliest pacemakers required a wall outlet.
✓ The average male will become bored after 26 minutes of shopping.
✓ Kissing someone is more sanitary than shaking hands, if you want to avoid a cold.
✓ The U.S. Navy uses Xbox controllers for its periscopes.
-BestLifeOnline, TimeandDate, Facts
Best of BS . . .
BS THINGS YOU SHOULDN’T SAY AT A FUNERAL:
• “I guess this means I’m out the 20 bucks he owes me.”
• “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that outfit!”
• “When did he die? Really? Hey Todd, you won the pool!”
• “Don’t look now Jason, but you and the deceased have the exact same suit on.”
• “He looks natural and all, but those shoes do NOT go with that dress.”
• “Whew, who died in here?”
-First published in BS in 2012
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ Spring arrived Tuesday night. (Kids these days…. they hear “vernal equinox” and think it’s a new Instagram filter!)
➠ Voting in Russia’s presidential election took place over the weekend, which was won by Vladimir Putin in a landslide. (It’s not surprising, since the ballot only gave voters a choice between ‘Putin’ and ‘Mysteriously Disappearing’…!)
➠ Pierce Brosnan was fined and formally charged with walking outside of a restricted area at Yellowstone Park. (His fine? Forced to watch “The Lawnmower Man”!)
➠ According to a study, crying babies end 1 in 3 marriages. (…and how many marriages ended because of crying wives? Asking for a friend…)
➠ The Hooters restaurant chain turns 41 this year. (I can’t believe I’ve been pretending to like their wings for that long!)
BS WEB GOODIE:
All wound up for the weekend? https://tinyurl.com/mtyxpn2f
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I’m not even a hot mess anymore. I’m just a mess — Room temp.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What did you eat so much of, that now you hate it?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
A survey showed that 2/3 of the people who use THESE are women. What are they?
Answer: Contact lenses
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.
