Friday, March 10, 2023 – Edition: #7435
Get a Load of This Sheet!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Could it soon be “Previously recorded from New York, it’s Saturday night!”?? Post-production editors behind “Saturday Night Live” are ready to strike, and have set a deadline of April 1. Barring an agreement with NBCUniversal, the group of 12-20 editing crew members have announced that they intend to halt work and disrupt the show if bargaining sessions in their bid for pay increases and health benefits continue to stall. In the nearly 50-year history of SNL, the series has never before been targeted with a show-specific strike.
★ For the past year, Volodymyr Zelensky has been greeted with open arms by awards shows, film festivals and even the New York Stock Exchange. But when it comes to the Oscars, the Ukrainian leader has been met with a cold shoulder. For the second year in a row, the Academy has snubbed Zelensky, who was hoping to follow up his Berlin Film Festival (remote) appearance last month with a virtual spot on Sunday’s Oscar telecast on ABC. Variety reports that power agent Mike Simpson made a plea to the Academy to include a message from Zelensky, but was shut down.
★ If you haven’t heard, it was all a prank – to promote a prank show. Nick Cannon set social media ablaze earlier this week when he said a big announcement was coming, but ultimately quashed speculation he had fathered his 13th child by revealing he’ll be appearing in a new game show hosted by Kevin Hart called “Who’s Having My Baby?”, in which female contestants compete to…have his next baby. Now, Cannon has revealed THAT reveal was a hoax, and was actually a clever bit of marketing for the actual new show he’s promoting, called “Celebrity Prank Wars”. On the show, “Celebrities…up the ante as each prank is more elaborate than the next.” Some celebs who’ll appear in the show include Nikki Bella, Tiffany Haddish, Taraji P. Henson, Lil Jon, Ludacris, Joel McHale, and Chance The Rapper. Celebrity Prank War premieres April 6.
★ While it’s not surprising that Paramount CEO Bob Bakish is very bullish about his studio’s next big summer blockbuster, “Mission: Impossible — Dead Reckoning,” he couldn’t hold back his hype for the two-part blockbuster. At the Morgan Stanley Technology, Media and Telecom Conference, he said: “The (test) audience lost their mind…the movie is insane. It’s like a complete thrill ride.” The 7th Mission: Impossible film will see Tom Cruise return as agent ‘Ethan Hunt’, and come face-to-face with someone from his past: ‘Eugene Kittridge’ (Henry Czerny), the former head of the IMF who was last seen in the first “Mission: Impossible” in 1996. It hits theaters July 14.
★ Jamie Lee Curtis has called on Bruce Springsteen to play afternoon concerts to make it easier for older fans to enjoy shows. In a red-carpet interview with The Hollywood Reporter, the actress admitted her comment was designed as “a taunt and a suggestion.” The 64-year-old said: “U2, do a matinee. Coldplay, do a matinee. What about a 12-noon concert, Coldplay? Turning her attention to the Boss, she said: “Bruce Springsteen, do a (bleep) matinee. You’re old. Why wouldn’t you let me come see you…in your glory days – pun intended – Two o’clock matinee – theater in New York…I will come and hear your 5-hour concert, Bruce, at two o’clock, then I’m gonna be home and in bed by 7:30.”
★ Jimmy Kimmel has a plan just in case someone attempts to slap him as he hosts the 2023 Oscars this Sunday. In an interview, the comedian was asked how he might handle a situation like what happened at last year’s event, when Will Smith walked up onstage and slapped Chris Rock. Quote: “Well, I size them up, and, if I’m bigger than they are, I beat the (bleep)— out of them on television…And if it’s (Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson), I run.”
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Kevin Bacon, Paul Mescal, Kali Uchis (R)
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Lucy Liu, Damson Idris, Bizarrap & Shakira
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Pedro Pascal, Taye Diggs, Zoë Brecher (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Trevor Noah, Shania Twain, Jono Zalay (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin
• “The Talk” (CBS): Aasif Mandvi, Jeri Ryan
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): F. Murray Abraham
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Chris Pratt, Jack Black, Keegan-Michael Key, Charlie Day, Meet Me @ The Altar (R)
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Melissa Rivers, Law Roach, Christian Siriano, Kevin Frazier, Nischelle Turner
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Patti Labelle
• “Lopez vs Lopez” (NBC): George believes all of Mayan’s problems can be solved by taking a second job, Oscar and Momo compete for the title of George’s best friend.
• “The Torso Killer Confessions” (A&E): Part 2. Bergen County NJ Detective Robert Anzilotti continues his mission to tie Cottingham to additional murders.
• “Miley Cyrus – Endless Summer Vacation (Backyard Sessions)” (Disney+): Featuring performances of songs from her new album, plus a revisiting her 2009 classic ‘The Climb’.
• “Masters of Illusion” (CW): Featured magicians include Dan Sperry, Deadly Game, Ben Barnes, Smoothini, Rob Lake, Joshua Jay and Wayne Hoffman.
• “Girl in the Closet” (Life): Adopted by her aunt, young Cameron turns to her faith when she finds herself imprisoned in a house of horrors with no human contact.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Jenna Ortega; The 1975 performs
• “Magnum P.I.” (NBC): Magnum recruits Katsumoto to help find a missing tourist; Higgins and Kumu attempt to solve the murder of a beloved dog.
• “The Simpsons” (Fox): Milhouse’s dad takes exception to a school history lesson that paints one of his ancestors in a bad light, and goes on a crusade to control the school curriculum — a crusade that Homer co-opts for fun and profit.
• “The Oscars” (ABC): Jimmy Kimmel hosts. Rihanna, Sofia Carson, Diane Warren, David Byrne, Stephanie Hsu and Son Lux perform. Presenters include Michael B. Jordan, Glenn Close, Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson and Nicole Kidman
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Bad Bunny – will host the live WWE event “Backlash” in his native Puerto Rico on May 6. It will take place at the Coliseo de Puerto Rico José Miguel Agrelot in San Juan. It will be the first live WWE event in Puerto Rico since 2005.
• Rihanna – sent flowers after residents at a Senior Living facility in Kentucky made a viral TikTok recreating her Super Bowl Halftime show. The facility’s Facebook page posted photos of the bouquet of white roses, and the note, which read: “You Ladies Dance Was Amazing Love Roc Nation Rihanna”. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mr2axy5b
• Weezer – TikToker dietlite_evan played the lick from the group’s 1994 hit ‘Buddy Holly’ on the app daily for 990 days before finally achieved his dream of duetting with the group. Finally, Rivers Cuomo joined him in a TikTok duet, and even invited him to join the band in person to play the song live with the group this summer. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/hu35zsx7
• Mötley Crüe – Their current “World Tour” with Def Leppard is definitely not their ‘farewell’. In a newly surfaced interview from December, Nikki Sixx said that the group’s members recently had a conversation where he said: “Why don’t we just keep going? Let’s just take it to 50 (years since the band’s inception, which will be in 2031).”
• Billy Squier – has released ‘Harder on a Woman’, his first new single in 25 years. Appearing on the song are guitarist G.E. Smith (from Bob Dylan and Hall & Oates’ groups), and Bad Company’s Simon Kirke on drums. Why now? Squier said that as news broke of the Roe v. Wade reversal in 2022, he had what he called a “Neil Young moment” and knew he had to take action. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4b6j6u8k
• Morgan Wallen — is once again on top of Billboard’s (all genre) Artist 100 list. Hot off the release of his new album “One Thing at a Time”, he has just moved back to the top, from #3. This is Wallen’s 7th non-consecutive week at #1, a record among country artists.
• Lainey Wilson — leads the pack at the 2023 CMT Music Awards with 4 nominations, followed by Cody Johnson, Kane Brown (who’s co-hosting the award show), and first-time nominee Jelly Roll, who have 3 each. This year’s ceremony airs live on CBS and Paramount+ on April 2.
• Kacey Musgraves – has teamed up with Boy Smells on a new room spray inspired by her song ‘Slow Burn’. Priced at $52, the KM + Boy Smells Slow Burn Room Spray is described as “glowing and dark,” “a little dank, a little crisp” and “commanding but not in a hurry.” She has previously offered a Slow Burn candle, of course. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2vkv5sjn
SHOOTING THE BULL
THIS WEEK’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Scream VI” (R, Horror/Thriller): Following the latest Ghostface killings, the 4 survivors leave Woodsboro to start a fresh chapter, only to learn that will not be so easy, as a new wave of killings begins. (Courteney Cox, Jenna Ortega, Hayden Panettiere) Tomatometer: 80%
• “Champions” (PG-13, Comedy): A former coach finds himself court-ordered to lead a new team of intellectual disabled adults. He comes to realize the group has more potential than anyone could imagine, and sets the stage for something that will change all their lives. (Woody Harrelson, Kaitlin Olson, Ernie Hudson) Tomatometer: 63%
• “65” (PG-13, Sci-fi, Adventure): After a crash on an unknown planet, a pilot discovers he’s actually stranded on Earth — 65 million years ago. He and the only other survivor must cross unknown terrain riddled with prehistoric creatures in a fight to survive. (Adam Driver, Ariana Greenblatt) No Tomatometer rating
THEY DON’T CALL IT A “PARTY IN THE BACK” FOR NOTHING:
Move over blondes — people with mullets have more fun. According to a study of 2,000 adults in the UK, those who sport the legendary “Kentucky Waterfall” enjoy more nights out, enjoy spicier food, and own a better wardrobe. The poll found that those who sport a “Camaro Crash Helmet” enjoy an average of 5 nights out a month. The non-mulleted average only 3. Those who wear an “Ape Drape” identified themselves as having the attributes of being a “free spirit”, “somewhat mischievous” and “doing the unexpected.” Those who wear “The Achy Breaky Big Mistakey” also self-describe themselves as more influential in their friend groups than those with more traditional trims (66% vs 37%), and they tend to socialize with colleagues a lot more than those without a “Mudflap”. One more thing: According to the survey, Rod Stewart’s blow-dried masterpiece is the best celebrity mullet of all time.
(Wait! That’s the end of the story? I still had a few more cool synonyms for “mullet”! I never even got to use “Skullet”!)
(I’m so glad that there’s SOMEOME in the world who can still take a joke!)
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A man in Spain has been ordered to pay his ex-wife $215,000 for 25 years of unpaid domestic labor. The record divorce settlement was calculated by a judge, based on the annual minimum wage throughout the couple’s marriage. The man must also pay his ex-wife, Ivana Moral, a monthly “pension” of $527, as well as $422 and $633 to his 20-year-old and 14-year-old daughters. The woman said she and her daughters were “left with nothing” when the couple, who married in 1995, were divorced in 2020. (No argument here. But in fairness, he did put up with his mother-in-law for 25 years – so that’s gotta be worth something!)
➢ A German ice cream parlor has expanded its menu by offering cricket-flavored scoops — with dried brown crickets on top. The unconventional confection is available at Thomas Micolino’s store in the town of Rottenburg am Neckar. Micolino, who has a history of creating unusual flavors has, in the past, offered liver sausage and Gorgonzola cheese ice cream — as well gold-plated ice cream for $4.25 per scoop. The ice cream is made of cricket flour, heavy cream, vanilla extract and, honey, and he tops it with dried whole crickets. He says it has a “surprising yummy taste”. (The response so far? Same as the name of the flavor!)
A BRIEF HISTORY OF DAYLIGHT-SAVING TIME:
At 2 am Sunday, clocks across North America will ‘spring forward’ one hour. Why do we do this?
✓ The idea of ‘Daylight Saving Time’ was first proposed in 1895 by New Zealand entomologist George Vernon Hudson, and although people were interested, it never caught on.
✓ In 1905, William Willett came up with the same idea in London. Why? He was an avid golfer who hated cutting short his Summer rounds on the links. Again, the idea failed to catch on.
✓ The Germans and their allies were the first to implement Daylight Saving Time as a way of conserving coal during WW1. Britain and many other European countries followed the example.
✓ The US adopted DST in 1918, but it wasn’t until 1966 that the whole country observed it. All Canadian provinces were on DST by the 1970s, except the majority of Saskatchewan, which stays on Central Standard Time year-round.
– CBC, first published in BS in 2020
DID YOU KNOW?
A new hormone shot could be the solution to getting sober faster. University of Texas researchers say their study shows that the hormone FGF21 might be able to reverse the effects of alcohol in half the time. The hormone works to help regulate your metabolism, and is naturally produced in our livers, but having an extra dose of it could be helpful when drinking. (If they came up with this sooner, I would have seen the second half of the Super Bowl!)
BS CHRONOMETER 03.10.23
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “International Day of Awesomeness”, a day to recognize that people are awesome every day, frequently don’t realize it, and their awesomeness is rarely recognized. LINK: http://dayofawesomeness.com
• “Mario Day”, saluting anyone with that name because the abbreviated date (MAR-10) ‘sort-of’ spells “Mario”. Famous Marios: TV chef Mario Batali, NHL Hall of Famer Mario Lemieux, TV personality Mario Lopez, and ‘Mario’ of “Super Mario Bros” videogame fame, of course.
• “International Bagpipe Day”, to celebrate the world’s many bagpipes and piping traditions. LINK: http://www.internationalbagpipeorganisation.com
• “Salvation Army Day”, on the anniversary of its establishment in the US on this day in 1880. The Sally Ann was founded by William Booth in London in 1865, then came to NYC to provide food, shelter and clothing to needy Americans.
• “Pack Your Lunch Day”, from the classic PB&J to the Pinterest-worthy mason jar salad, homemade lunches are both fun and filling. Best of all, since you make it yourself, you can pack all your favorite foods! (But don’t pack yourself a lunch full of brownies — your mother taught you better than that.)
• “Landline Telephone Day”, On this day in 1876, Alexander Graham Bell made the first ever telephone call. Today, celebrate your landline, if you still have one. (…Grandmaw…)
• “Middle Name Pride Day”, today’s name celebration requires honesty and possibly some courage. Tell your middle name to 3 people who don’t already know it (Who you are sure you can trust…)
FAMOUS PEOPLE’S WEIRD MIDDLE NAMES:
➢ Richard Tiffany Gere
➢ Daniel Wroughten Craig
➢ Drew Allison Carey
➢ Quincy Delight Jones
➢ Kiefer William Frederick Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland
• “National Promposal Day”, when high school students across North America celebrate their creativity by sharing their unique and often elaborate proposals to ask each other to prom. (Are these still a thing? Or are they going the way of the ‘gender reveal’?) IDEAS LINK: https://tinyurl.com/5n87cj7v
• Worship of Tools Day” (aka “Tool Appreciation Day”), celebrating men’s inexplicable fascination with high-priced gizmos. (What tool have you bought, then never used?)
• “World Plumbing Day”, initiated by the World Plumbing Council to celebrate the important role plumbing plays in the health & safety of modern society. (To celebrate, wear your pants at half-mast … just like a plumber.) LINK: https://www.worldplumbing.org/worldplumbingday/
• “Johnny Appleseed Day”, Yes, there really was a Johnny Appleseed. His name was John Chapman when he was born in Massachusetts in 1774. He didn’t just walk around the country sprinkling apple seeds all over the place. He was a serious nurseryman who established orchards in the wilderness of the Midwest. He then gave or sold trees to pioneers who depended on apples as a staple in their diets.
• “Debunking Day”, a day do everything the “MythBuster” guys ever told you not to try at home. (Then call your mom, crying because your apartment blew up . . .)
• “Fanny Pack Day”, Don’t. Just…don’t.
• “Daylight Saving Time”, in North America begins at 2 am. The annual ‘Spring Forward’ is now usually programmed right into computers, phones, and other electronic devices. Also today: “Check Your Batteries Day”, when you should test and/or replace smoke alarm batteries. (And remember, it’s ‘Daylight Saving Time’, not ‘Savings’!)
• “World Day Against Cyber Censorship”, initiated by Reporters Without Borders and Amnesty International in 2008. The idea is to rally in support of a single internet that is unrestricted and accessible to all, and to try to keep governments from controlling it. (Timely, no?)
• “Alfred Hitchcock Day”, his prolific film-making career spanned half a century – from 1921 to his last film, “Family Plot”, in 1976. His unique cinematic style in the genres of psychological thrillers and suspense movies earned him the title ‘Master of Suspense’.
• “Girl Scout Day”, celebrating the creation of the first Girl Scout group (originally ‘Girl Guides’) on March 12, 1912 by Juliette Gordon Low in Savannah GA, who gathered together a troop of 18 girls and taught them how to milk a cow, tie up a burglar, and the complicated art of boiling water. (So, grab a cookie [or 12], and celebrate!)
• “Plant a Flower Day”, a day to get a little dirt under your fingernails. Take a few minutes and plant a petunia today (or at least blow the dust off the fake ones).
• “Baked Scallops Day”, there are two fleshy parts of the scallop that are usually sold at the market for human consumption. The adductor muscle is the white medallion of meat which is rich and sweet. This is the piece that is the “scallop” we see on a menu.
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1940  (Carlos) Chuck Norris, Ryan OK, martial artist/TV actor (“Walker, Texas Ranger” 1993-2001)/movie actor (“Missing in Action”, “Way of the Dragon”)
1947  Tom Scholz, Toledo OH, rock guitarist (Boston-‘More Than a Feeling’, ‘Amanda’)/MIT-trained engineer-inventor (created his own line of guitar effects under the name “Rockman”)
1949  Barbara Corcoran, Edgewater NJ, businesswoman/TV personality (“Shark Tank” since 2009)
1958  Sharon Stone, Meadville PA, movie actress (“Basic Instinct”, “Casino”) COMING UP…“What About Love”
1963  Rick Rubin, Long Beach NY, music producer (AC/DC, Adele, Ed Sheeran, Jay Z, Josh Groban, Justin Bieber, Run-DMC, Kanye West, Metallica, etc.)
1971  Jon Hamm, St Louis MO, TV actor (“Mad Men” 2007-15)/movie actor (“Top Gun: Maverick”, “The Town”) COMING UP… “Fargo” season 5 (TV series)
1972  Timbaland (Timothy Mosley), Norfolk VA, music producer (Jay Z, Justin Timberlake, Madonna, Nelly Furtado, Rihanna, Usher, etc.)
1977  Robin Thicke, LA CA, pop singer (‘Blurred Lines’, ‘Sex Therapy’)/son of Alan Thicke and Gloria Loring
1983  Carrie Underwood, Muskogee OK, country singer (‘Cry Pretty, ‘Before He Cheats’)/“American Idol” season 4 winner/married to ex-NHLer Mike Fisher since 2010
1984  Olivia Wilde (Cockburn), NYC, movie actress (“Don’t Worry, Darling” [also director-producer], “TRON: Legacy”)/TV actress (“House MD” 2007-12)
1994  Bad Bunny (Benito Ocasio), Almirante Sur Puerto Rico, reggaeton rapper-singer-songwriter (w/Cardi B and J Balvin-‘I Like It’, ft. Drake-‘Mia’)
SATURDAY- Rupert Murdoch (“Fox News” owner) is 92; Bobby McFerrin (‘Don’t Worry Be Happy’) is 73; Lisa Loeb (‘Stay [I Missed You]’) is 55; Terrence Howard (“Empire”) is 54; Johnny Knoxville (“Jackass”) is 52; Twins Benji & Joel Madden (Good Charlotte) are 44; Melissa Rycroft (“Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team”) is 40; Jodie Comer (“Killing Eve”) is 30
SUNDAY- Liza Minnelli (“Cabaret”) is 77; James Taylor (‘Fire & Rain’) is 75; Jason Beghe (“Chicago PD”) is 63; Aaron Eckhart (“The Dark Knight”) is 55; Jaimie Alexander (“Blindspot”) is 39
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2010  Canadian actor Corey Haim (“The Lost Boys”) dies of pneumonia at 38
2009  Mandy Moore (“This is Us”) weds singer-songwriter Ryan Adams in a quiet ceremony in Savannah GA (they divorce in 2016)
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2003  AC/DC, The Righteous Brothers, Elvis Costello and the Attractions, The Clash, The Police, and Floyd Cramer are inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
2008  Madonna is inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, along with John Mellencamp, The Dave Clark Five, The Ventures, and Leonard Cohen
2003  During a concert in London, Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines says she’s “ashamed the president of the USA is from Texas” (severely impacting their career)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2015  Marvin Gaye’s estate wins a $7.3 million lawsuit against Robin Thicke, Pharrell Williams, and T.I., after a jury finds Thicke’s song ‘Blurred Lines’ is too similar to Gaye’s 1977 hit ‘Got to Give It Up’
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The Los Angeles coroner’s department has a gift shop.
✓ Puma, cougar, panther and mountain lion are names for the exact same animal. The scientific name is puma.
✓ Each day, your mouth produces anywhere from 2 to 4 pints of saliva.
✓ Because the speed of earth’s rotation changes over time, a day in the age of dinosaurs was just 23 hours long.
✓ The world’s first known vending machine dispensed holy water. (Egypt, A.D. 100)
✓ Pope Francis used to be a nightclub bouncer.
Best of BS . . .
BS MORE, MORE ACCURATE COMPANY SLOGANS:
• Home Depot: No, you CAN’T do it…but we’ll sell you all the stuff to make you think you can
• Ben & Jerry’s: Treat your sadness
• BMW: Get out the way, peasants
• Kraft Mac N’ Cheese: The tab definitely won’t open the box
• Expedia: Don’t be miserable at home with your family . . . be miserable anywhere
• Dollar Tree: What did you expect? It’s a DOLLAR
• Sam’s Club: For when your town doesn’t have a Costco
• Campbell’s Soup: M’mm M’mm Salty!
• Caribbean Cruises: Came sail on the good ship Floating Sewer of Diarrhea
• Amazon: Resistance is futile
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2022
TODAY’S SCOOP OF BS:
➠ A couple in their 80s just got married after falling in love on an internet dating site. (The bride said, ‘This is a moment I’ll never forget.’ …then, she forgot!)
➠ A couple in their 80s just got married after falling in love on an internet dating site. (It marked the only time on record at a backyard wedding where the groom yelled at the minister to ‘Get off my lawn!!’)
➠ Jimmy Buffett is expanding his retirement home concept, called “Latitude Margaritaville”, into 4 Texas cities. (Not to be outdone, another senior living company has decided to start producing recycled-cheap-worn-out-and-corny-country/coconut music…)
➠ Chuck Norris is 83 today. (And remember, Chuck Norris doesn’t blow out his birthday candles. He stares at them . . . and they extinguish themselves…)
➠ I watched “Cocaine Bear” last weekend. (I have to admit – it was so funny — I snorted a little!)
BS WEB GOODIE:
This guy’s sleepin’ on the couch this weekend (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/3pz63une
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I sympathize with batteries. I’m never included in anything either.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What happens regularly in our country that people elsewhere would find strange or bizarre?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: A study found that couples who share similar tastes in THIS are happier than couples who don’t. What is it?
Answer: Their sense of humor
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.