Thursday, May 6, 2004        Edition: #2783
King Sheet!

“FRIENDS” AT-A-GLANCE:
TONIGHT is the series finalé of NBC-TV’s “Friends” (had you heard?). A few facts …
• The 2-hour farewell orgy starts with an hour-long retrospective of classic scenes, followed by the 1-hour final episode, then the cast continues to reminisce on “The Tonight Show” later on.
• An audience of 85 million is forecast.
• It’s the biggest TV sign-off since “Seinfeld” bowed out in 1998.
• The show lasted 10 seasons and 236 episodes. The first episode aired September 22, 1994.
• Ads for the finalé cost $2 million per 30-second spot, just slightly less than Super Bowl ads.
• The final episode was actually taped way back on JANUARY 23rd.
• TOMORROW “Friends … ‘Til the End: The Official Farewell Commemorative” hits stores, a scrapbook that will retail for circa $40. TUESDAY the DVD “Friends: The Series Finale”, including the  final episode, the pilot & other extras goes on sale (about $15).

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY’s the final day to bid on eBay for the grille of Billy Joel’s smashed-up classic Citroen car, being auctioned by WBLI Long Island’s ‘Slam the Stuntman’ for charity . . . TONIGHT CBS-TV airs the penultimate episode of “Survivor: All-Stars”, setting up the finalé for SUNDAY when the winner will be revealed live from Madison Square Garden . . . TONIGHT ABC-TV’s “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” (aka ‘Weepy Wenos’) will air a live episode from NYC in which Ty and the designers try to complete the job in less than 12 hours (the ‘reveal’ will air at 10:50 pm) . . . Steve Jobs & John Lasseter of Pixar Animation (“Finding Nemo”) top “Premiere” magazine’s just-released annual list of ‘The 100 Most Influential People in Hollywood’ . . . Anna Nicole Smith is launching a clothing line in conjunction with designer label Von Dutch (after losing 70 lbs, she might actually fit into the stuff!) . . . Word at the NYC Kabbalah Center is that Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher tied the knot in secret during a spiritual retreat LAST MONTH, reports “In Touch” magazine . . . Former Guns N’ Roses bandmates Slash & Duff McKagan are suing frontman Axl Rose for failing to consult them before turning down lucrative offers from movie producers wanting to use the group’s music in films . . . The final accounting is in and that concert series to relieve the impact of SARS in Hong Kong LAST YEAR ended up costing $12.8 million and attracted only 43% capacity crowds (oops!) . . . And the UK’s Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals has cited Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie for treating their little lap dogs like accessories – lugging them around in handbags and dressing them up in outfits – both practices extremely stressful for poochies, according to the RSPCA.  

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Luther Vandross – TODAY on “Oprah” he’ll do his 1st interview since his stroke a year ago.
• Dixie Chicks – Martie Maguire gave birth to twins APRIL 27th, Eva Ruth & Kathleen Emilie.
• Britney Spears – She tried to cancel the European leg of her “Onyx Hotel Tour” because she’s sick of life on the road, according to reports.
• Mariah Carey – She’s shopping for a personal helicopter and recently took a $5-million Sikorsky for a test flight for a taping of the new Spike-TV show “Ride With Funkmaster Flex”.
• Lee Ann Womack – TODAY “The Wrong Girl” is on TV’s “On Air With Ryan Seacrest”.

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
Jodie Foster (as in, where have you been?) will play a mother whose daughter disappears on board an airliner in the thriller “Flight Plan” . . . Tom Hanks will play a father forced to raise his son alone after his estranged wife has a nervous breakdown in the drama “The Risk Pool” . . . TV sitcom stars Ray Romano (“Everybody Loves Raymond”) & Kevin James (“King of Queens”) will co-star in the bigscreen comedy “Grilled”, playing two meat salesmen who’ll stop at nothing to make a sale . . . Robert Redford, who played a baseball phenom in “The Natural”, will  play Brooklyn Dodgers GM Branch Rickey in an as-yet-untitled drama about Jackie Robinson breaking baseball’s color barrier . . . Filming on the $100-million action film “Stealth” near Sydney, Australia has been put on hold because the Australian Land & Environment Court has ruled it was endangering – the larvae of the giant native dragonfly . . . And Ashton Kutcher has been asked to play Tommy Lee in a movie adaptation of the Motley Crue autobiography “The Dirt: Confessions of the World’s Most Notorious Rock Band” (Ashton’s looking forward to getting into character by sleeping with Pam Anderson).

MUSCULAR MEN GIVE AVERAGE MALES INFERIORITY COMPLEX:
Researchers at the University of Central Florida say TV images of muscular men lifting weights and endorsing cologne can leave men feeling depressed and unhappy with their muscularity, which may lead to steroid abuse. Numerous studies have shown how images of thin and beautiful models affect women’s self-esteem, but the UCF study is among the first to examine how portrayals of athletic and brawny men affects the male mind.
– ANI

WORLD’S SEXIEST MOMS:
1. Heidi Klum (the 29-year-old model is expected to give birth later THIS MONTH)
2. Angelina Jolie
3. Pam Anderson
4. ‘Marge Simpson’
5. Shania Twain
– Wallpaper.com

BARBIE-SHAPED WOMEN ARE MOST FERTILE:
At last, the male penchant for women with an hourglass figure may have some biological justification. A new study conducted at Poland’s Jagiellonian University reveals that large-breasted, narrow-waisted women have the highest reproductive potential. According to the researchers, women with a relatively low waist-to-hip ratio and large breasts have about 30% higher levels of the female reproductive hormone than women with other body shapes.
– “New Scientist”

C U JOHN:
Highlights of a new poll on what people with cellphone text messaging use it for …
• 45% of females & 31% of males have secretly checked text messages on their partner’s phone.
• 44% have used text messages to flirt (75% of 15 to 24-year-olds).
• 31% have sent a love letter by text.
• 30% have used text messages to argue.
• 9% have used a text message to dump a partner (20% of 15 to 24-year-olds).
• 2% have actually used a text message to quit a job.
– UK telecommunications company Sicap.

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• There are more Puerto Ricans in New York City than in Puerto Rico.
– “Amusing Facts”
Philandering footballer David Beckham is the best-paid soccer player in the world for the 2nd year running, raking in a cool $26.8 million.
– “France Football” magazine.

AND WE QUOTE:
“All-Stars was a fun experiment but I would vote to never do it again.” – “Survivor” host Jeff Probst.

THE BULL SHEET 05.06.2K4

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1945 [59] Bob Seger, Dearborn MI, classic rock singer (“Against the Wind”, “Night Moves”)/ Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2004)

1953 [51] Tony Blair, Edinburgh SCOT, British Prime Minister since 1997 (Labour Party)

1955 [49] Tom Bergeron, Haverhill MA, TV host (“America’s Funniest Home Videos” since 2001, “Hollywood Squares” since 1998)

1961 [43] George Clooney, Lexington KY, movie actor (“Intolerable Cruelty”, “Ocean’s 11″)  COMING UP: The sequel “Oceans 12″, opening DECEMBER 10.

1971 [33] Chris Shiflett, Santa Barbara CA, rock guitarist (Foo Fighters-“Times Like These”, Grammy Award-“All My Life”)

1972 [32] Martin Brodeur, Montréal QC, NHL goalie (NJ Devils)/2003-04 NHL All-Star & Wm M Jennings Trophy (lowest goals-against)/2002 Team Canada Olympic gold medal team)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is the 13th annual “International No Diet Day”, started in 1992 by Mary Evans Young, author of “Diet Breaking: Having It All Without Having To Diet”. The following year, and each year since, the day has been celebrated internationally.
REASONS TO AVOID LOW CARB DIETS:
• Quick initial weight loss is deceptive, mainly due to dehydration and muscle loss.
• Adherents tend to fatigue easily, leading to a reduction in exercise.
• A diet low in carbs can cause muscles and skin to lack tone and become saggy.
• The percentage of dieters who re-gain the weight they’ve lost is very high because they fail to adopt a long-term healthy lifestyle.
• Eating too much fat is just not healthy.
• Low carb diets are lacking in fiber.
• Low carb diets lack many of the nutrients and antioxidants found in fruits, vegetables,  legumes & whole grains.
• North Americans already consume more than twice the amount of protein needed.
• Bad breath, often called ‘keto breath’ or ‘acetone breath’.
– “Fast & Healthy Weight Loss” , by exercise physiologist Greg Landry.

TODAY is the beginning of “Nurses Week”, culminating in “International Nurse’s Day” on MAY 12th, Florence Nightingale’s birthday.

TODAY is “Childhood Depression Awareness Day”, sponsored by the National Mental Health
Association.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1997 [07] Canadian folk icon Joni Mitchell is inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame

1998 [06] Shania Twain’s hit single “You’re Still The One” is certified Platinum

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1973 [31] Now-defunct ‘World Hockey Association’ (WHA) begins 1st championship (won by Winnipeg Jets led by Bobby Hull)

1840 [164] Britain’s ‘Penny Black’ is 1st ‘adhesive postage stamp’ (before that you had to nail ‘em on)

1851 [153] Florida’s John Gorrie receives 1st ‘refrigerator’ patent, then fails to find investors, has a nervous breakdown and dies (what an inspiring story, huh?)

1950 [54] 1st marriage for Liz Taylor, to Conrad Hilton Jr (Quote: “This is the man I wan to spend my life with.”)

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1995 [09] ‘World’s largest collection of footwear’ goes on display as Bata Shoe Museum opens in Toronto
NET: http://www.batashoemuseum.ca

1995 [09] ‘World’s largest margarita’ measures 3,500 gallons (San Antonio TX)

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] International Tuba Day
[Sat] Native American Day
[Sat] No Socks Day
[Sat] Single Mother’s Day
[Sun] Mother’s Day
[Sun] Lost Sock Memorial Day
[Sun] National Small Business Day
This Week Is . . . Suicide Awareness Week / Muffin Week
This Month Is . . . Better Hearing & Speech Month / Eat Dessert First Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
BS “FRIENDS” TRIVIA:
• What’s the name of the group that sings the “Friends” theme song? [The Rembrandts.]
• What was the name of Ross’ pet monkey? [‘Marcel’.]
• Joey plays ‘Dr Drake Ramoray’ on what soap opera? [“Days of Our Lives”.]
• Which “Friend” won a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest? [Chandler.]
• Where is Rachel’s tattoo? [On her hip.]
• What member of royalty guest-starred on “Friends”? [Duchess of York Sarah ‘Fergie’ Ferguson.]
• Phoebe has a phobia about which retail store chain? [Pottery Barn.]
• What’s Chandler’s middle name? [‘Muriel‘.]
• What’s Joey’s favorite food? [Sandwiches.]
• What type of doctor was Monica’s boyfriend Richard, played by Tom Selleck? [Ophthalmologist.]
– “Daily News”

BS ‘HERE OR HEREAFTER’?
Are the following Baseball Hall of Famers stiff or still swingin’?
• Willie Mays [Alive and 73 TODAY.]
• Mickey Mantle [Died in 1995.]
• Stan Musial [Alive and 83.]
• Hank Aaron [The all-time career home run champ is alive at 70.]
• Johnny Bench [Alive at the Bench-mark of 56.]
• Yogi Berra [Alive and 78 … because it’s never over till it’s over.]
• Joe DiMaggio [Finally fouled out in 1999.]
• Whitey Ford    [Alive at 77.]
• Willie Stargell [Died 2001.]
• Ted Williams [The ‘Splendid Splinter’ split in 2002.]

BS BLATANT JOKE:
It was supposed to be hot today but I put my air conditioner in backwards … and it got cold outside.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: It’s a wee bit strange but 3% of us say we do THIS in the bathtub.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Eat ice cream.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Ego: Something which enables people to bear living with themselves.