May 8 2020

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Friday, May 8, 2020        Edition: #6693

Bull Works!

★ Kevin Spacey broke his silence and spoke to a crowd for the first time since his #MeToo accusations of sexual assault in 2017. Speaking as part of a German business conference, Spacey gave a 10-minute speech that was streamed from his home. In it, Spacey compared losing his job to people who are out of work as a result of the coronavirus. He explained that while he usually doesn’t like to tell people he can relate to their situation, he said in this instance, (QUOTE) “I can relate to what it feels like to have your world suddenly stop. And so while we may have found ourselves in similar situations albeit for very different reasons, I still feel that some of the emotional struggles are very much the same, and it’s a situation you have absolutely no control over.”
★ Fans are being given the chance to appear in “Bill & Ted Face the Music”. Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves will return to their respective alter egos Bill S. Preston, Esq. and Ted ‘Theodore’ Logan for the third instalment of the fantasy teen comedy — and now fans are being given an opportunity to be in the movie by submitting a video of themselves rocking out. The new website “Party On With Bill and” invites fans to ”be a most excellent part of our movie”. How? ”Show us your moves! Rock out with any instrument – real or fake – or just play air guitar!” The movie is scheduled for release on Aug. 21. (Bodacious!)
★ Danny Trejo is set to unveil a documentary chronicling his journey from prisoner to film star. The “Machete” star’s troubled past is explored in “Inmate #1: The Rise of Danny Trejo”, which is set to hit digital platforms on July 7. Directed by Brett Harvey, it follows Trejo’s troubled childhood and his battle with addiction before he found himself behind bars.
★ Paris Hilton has created a collection of merchandise to help raise money for coronavirus relief. She’s announced her “Sliving” line – a phrase created from the of the words ‘slaying’ and ‘living’ – which includes black, pink, and white T-shirts as well as hoodies and sweatshirts that will see proceeds go towards charities helping to fight the global health crisis.

• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Mark Ruffalo, Guy Raz, Miranda Lambert
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, James Taylor, Glen Sobel (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Ellen Pompeo, Mike Colter, Loud Luxury & Bryce Vine (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Dylan McDermott
• “The Talk” (CBS): Juliette Lewis, Rumer Willis
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Lin-Manuel Miranda, Marlo Thomas, Phil Donahue, Eric Ripert
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): “Oh, the Places We Went”
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): A new Message From Montana, repeat segments with Eugene Levy, Alyson Hannigan (R)
• “Dynasty” (CW): Season 3 finale
• “Masters of Illusion: Impossible Escapes” (CW): Magicians attempt seemingly impossible escapes while in the studio and in the field; hosted by Dean Cain

• “Maternal Secrets” (LIFETIME): While on vacation in Bermuda, a pregnant woman searches the island for her politician boyfriend when he mysteriously disappears.
• “Accident, Suicide or Murder” (OXYGEN): Season 2 premiere. A beautiful young woman is found in her locked apartment with 20 stab wounds; the medical examiner classifies her death as murder but later changes the ruling to suicide, a decision that forces her family into the fight of their lives.

• “American Idol” (ABC): The remaining finalists perform two songs each, one from the Disney songbook and one dedicated to the mother figures in their lives; Laine Hardy performs.
• “Feeding America Comedy Festival” (NBC): Rescheduled from May 9. Performances from Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock, Billy Crystal, Kevin Hart, Tiffany Haddish, Marc Maron, Adam Sandler, Margaret Cho, Judd Apatow, Sarah Silverman, and many more comedians.
• “The Disney Family Singalong: Volume II” (ABC): Ryan Seacrest hosts a singalong event featuring celebrities and their families as they take on their favorite Disney tunes from their homes; onscreen lyrics allow viewers to sing along.
• “I Know This Much Is True” (HBO): Series premiere. After paranoid schizophrenic Thomas Birdsey has a violent breakdown, his twin, Dominick, steps up to defend him in unexpected ways.
• “The Rookie” (ABC): Season 2 finale

• Lady Gaga — has announced a new release date for her forthcoming album “Chromatica”. In March, she postponed the release of her sixth album from its initial date of April 10 due to the coronavirus pandemic, saying it “just doesn’t feel right”. The new album will now arrive on May 29.
• Adele — turned 32 on Tuesday, and when she took to Instagram to thank fans for their well-wishes, she included a picture of herself, revealing her new slim figure. The image shows Adele wearing a black minidress black heels as she stands in front a house with a huge smile on her face.
• 50 Cent – admitted to an interviewer that that his lyrics are misogynistic, but according to him, like any artist, he should be free to express himself. Quote: ”Are you going to tell a painter what to paint? I’m an artist. Why am I limited to what you feel should be said?”
• Queen – Brian May is doubtful about the possibility of a sequel to the band’s 2018 biopic “Bohemian Rhapsody”. He told Rolling Stone that although they have looked at the idea “pretty seriously”, “We don’t really think there’s another movie there.” But he cautions that “Things could change.”
• Kraftwerk – Co-founder Florian Schneider has died after a battle with cancer. He was 73. He started Kraftwerk with fellow German multi-instrumentalist Ralf Hutter in 1968. The group produced 10 albums during Schneider’s tenure, including 1975’s #5 hit ‘Autobahn’, before his departure in 2008.
• Jon Bon Jovi – is one of the big names set to perform for “A Night Of Covenant House Stars,” a live stream concert benefiting the Covenant House charity. The show will air on May 18 on Broadway On Demand. Dolly Parton, Meryl Streep, and other big names are also on the bill.
• Kenny Chesney – is “cautiously optimistic” that he will be able to play live this year. His 2020 “Chillaxification Tour” was set to kick off on April 18. As he put it, “We play a lot of the venues that the NFL play. We’re just kind of watching what happens with that, and we’ll see.”
• Luke Combs – was initially concerned that writing a song about the pandemic might be cliché, but his new song ‘Six Feet Apart’ has definitely has struck a chord with fans. He says that when he hopped on a Zoom call with a few writers, he asked them: ‘Hey, do we write a song about this thing? Or is that too cheesy?'” The song is available now.
• George Strait — recently participated in Texas First Lady Cecilia Abbott’s “Stars of Texas Storytime” which is a Facebook Live program that features Texas celebrities reading children’s stories. He read the kids’ book “Never Ask a Dinosaur to Dinner” by Gareth Edwards.

Great news just in time for the weekend: German researchers say they have created one of the few hangover remedies that is backed by science. A team from Johannes Gutenberg University gave 214 adults in 3 groups the chance to drink as much as they wanted for four hours. One group was given the new hangover concoction made of specific plant extracts, vitamins and minerals, and antioxidant compounds, another was given a simple solution of vitamins and minerals, and the third group received a placebo with only glucose. 12 hours later, participants were asked to rank the severity of their hangover. Those who used the new cure had improved hangover symptoms compared to participants in the other two groups. The average headache intensity was 34% less severe and nausea symptoms decreased by 42%. No word yet on when their “cure” will be available.
(I’m still not sure what they meant by “Just in time for the weekend”?)
(Just in time for Mother’s Day!)
(My worst hangover symptom is an empty wallet. Was this able to help that?)

➢ Police were called after receiving reports of an alligator swimming in a storm drainage pond in Brampton, Ontario, north of Toronto. The gator was said to be five to six feet in length. After a few hours of searching, police tweeted that based on video from social media, it had been determined the feared gator was actually — a beaver. Although animal control officers were also on hand, police stood by — quote –“ready to provide Gator-aid.” (I’m sure they also called in an “investi-gator”!)
➢ A man was taken into custody for camping at Walt Disney World’s Discovery Island while the company’s parks are closed amid the coronavirus outbreak. Police say 42-year-old Richard McGuire had made his way onto the island on Monday or Tuesday to camp for a week. Police caught up with him on Thursday and charged him with trespassing on posted property. The man claimed he did not know he was trespassing and thought he was just exploring a “tropical paradise.” Discovery Island, originally called “Treasure Island,” has been closed to the public since 1999. (A Disney rep offered to sell the man a Coke for six bucks!)
-CP, People

Remember Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s “speaking moistly” comment? A company has named a lip balm in honor of the viral moment. Trudeau accidentally let the hilarious phrase slip while discussing physical distancing rules at a press conference on April 7. Now, “Painted People Tattoo Company” has launched a “Speaking Moistly” lip balm that is selling for $4.99.


1944 [76] Gary Glitter, (Paul Gadd) Banbury UK, rock singer (‘Rock and Roll, Part Two’, ‘Do You Wanna Touch Me? [Oh Yeah]’)

1953 [67] Alex Van Halen, Nijmegen Netherlands, classic rock drummer (Van Halen-‘Jump’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2007)/brother of guitarist Eddie Van Halen

1957 [63] Bill Cowher, Crafton PA, TV football analyst (“NFL Today on CBS”)/retired NFL coach (Pittsburgh Steelers 1992-2007)/retired player (Super Bowl 40 winner – 2006)/Hall of Fame (2020)

1964 [56] Melissa Gilbert, Los Angeles CA, TV Actress (‘Laura Ingalls’ on “Little House on the Prairie” 1974-1983)

1975 [45] Enrique Iglesias (Preysler), Madrid Spain, pop/Latin singer (‘Hero’, ‘I Like It’- f/Pitbull)

SATURDAY- Candice Bergen (“Murphy Brown”) is 74; Billy Joel (‘Piano Man’) is 71; John Corbett (“My Big Fat Greek Wedding”) is 59; Pierre Bouvier (Simple Plan) is 41; Rosario Dawson (Sin City”) is 41; Audrina Patridge (“The Hills”) is 35; Noah Centino (“To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before”) is 24

SUNDAY- Chris Berman (“SportsCenter”) is 65;  Bono [Paul Hewson] (U2) is 60; Kenan Thompson (“Saturday Night Live”) is 42

• “V-E Day”, Victory in Europe Day, generally known as V-E Day, or simply V Day, is the public holiday celebrated on 8 May 1945 to mark the formal acceptance by the Allies of World War II of Nazi Germany’s unconditional surrender of its armed forces. It thus marked the end of World War II in Europe.

• “Student Nurse Day”, As part of National Nurses Week, Student Nurses are honored today.

• “National Have A Coke Day”, a day to enjoy a glass of ice-cold Coca-Cola (or two). Fun fact: cans of coke first appeared in 1955. Some call it ‘soda’. In other parts, it’s called ‘pop,’ or ‘tonic’. (In my family, it’s called ‘mix’!) [***See ‘Today’s Firsts’, below***]

• “No Socks Day”, when we’re encouraged to avoid wearing socks to feel less encumbered and help the environment by creating less laundry. (I fail to see how not covering my feet will in any way help the environment!)

• “World Red Cross Day”, celebrating the 1828 birth of Jean Henri Dunant in Geneva, Switzerland, founder of the International Red Cross/Red Crescent.

• “National Coconut Cream Pie Day”, whether vanilla, lemon, lime, peanut butter, banana, coconut or chocolate, find one today. And remember: It’s Gilligan’s favorite!

• “Lost Sock Memorial Day”, a day to remember those singular hose that went into the washing machine or dryer, never to return. (And play ‘Taps’ for them?)
• “Butterscotch Brownie Day” also known as Blondies or Brookie (brownie + cookie). Blonde brownies were actually created before chocolate brownies.
• “Tear the Tags Off the Mattress Day”, Definitely not an event for the timid. However, if you crave excitement and like living on the edge, gird up your loins and take courage! Ignore those posted warnings from the government and rip those tags right off! And if you’re really gutsy, do the pillows too.
• “Babysitter’s Day”, honoring those dedicated young folks who take care of our even younger folks. (To honor the occasion we’re doubling the tip … here’s a dollar!)

• “Mother’s Day”, in some 60 countries including Australia, Canada, Denmark, Italy, New Zealand, Turkey, and the USA. The modern holiday of Mother’s Day was first celebrated in 1908, when Anna Jarvis held a memorial for her mother at a church in Grafton, West Virginia. In a normal year, more North Americans eat out on “Mothers Day” than any other special occasion. (No reservations? Forget it.)
• “Clean Up Your Room Day”. What, once a year? Were you born in a barn?
• “Trust Your Intuition Day”, a day to listen to your ‘gut feelings’ and act upon them. Is it true … are women better at this than men? (I had a feeling they were…)
• “National Small Business Day”. A ‘small business’ is commonly defined as one with fewer than 100 employees. (Many of today’s small businesses used to be big businesses…)
• “World Lupus Day”, to create awareness of the potentially fatal auto-immune disease capable of damaging virtually any part of the body. 9-out-of-10 people with lupus are women (such as Selena Gomez)
• “Canadian Tulip Festival” through May 18th in Canada’s Capital Region of Ottawa-Gatineau. A Celebration of the Gift of Tulips and the 75th Anniversary of the Liberation of the Netherlands during World War II, this year’s celebration will take place online. LINK:
• “National Shrimp Day”, Some shrimpy Whack Facts:
✓ Most of the shrimp consumed in the United States comes from the Atlantic and Pacific coasts and the Gulf Coast.
✓ Generally speaking, the colder the water, the smaller and more succulent the shrimp.
✓ Shrimp change color when you cook them due to a heat induced chemical change in their shells.
✓ Jumbo and colossal shrimp are referred to as prawns – although the prawn is actually a different species.
✓ The Bubba Gump Shrimp Company Restaurant was inspired by 1994 film “Forrest Gump”. It operates about 45 restaurants worldwide.

2006 [14] After holding his breath underwater for 7 minutes at NYC’s Lincoln Center, illusionist David Blaine fails to break the world record by having to be pulled out by divers 2 minutes short

1993 [27] The newly formed Backstreet Boys give their first-ever public performance, at SeaWorld Orlando.

1886 [134] Jacob’s Pharmacy in Atlanta GA sells the first Coca-Cola

1987 [33] Canada’s 1‑dollar coin is introduced (quickly nicknamed the ‘loonie’, due to its reverse-side depiction of the common loon, a bird that’s well‑known throughout the country)

2010 [10] At age 88, Betty White becomes oldest‑ever host of “Saturday Night Live” (NBC)


✓ The word for “mom” is “mama” in Mandarin Chinese, “mamma” in Iceland, “em” in Hebrew, and “me” in Vietnamese. Because one of the first utterances babies make is a “ma” sound, most languages use that sound as the basis for their word for “mother”.
✓ Mothers do about 88% of laundry in the U.S. households. This equals 330 loads of laundry and 5,300 articles of clothing per year.
✓ The mother who gave birth to the heaviest baby was in 1955. Her newborn weighed 22 pounds 8 oz (10.2 kg).
✓ Mrs. Feodor Vassilyev of Russia gave birth to 69 children between 1725 and 1765.
✓ A mother orangutan never puts her babies down and typically nurses them for 6 or 7 years.
✓ On average, moms take 2 minutes 5 seconds to change a diaper. Fathers take an average of 1 minute 36 seconds.

Best of BS . . .

Forget the flowers and greeting cards; a few things mom would actually appreciate …
✓ To eat an entire meal without any discussion of bodily functions at the table.
✓ At least 5 minutes in the bathroom without someone knocking on the door because they can’t find something.
✓ Instead of a candy bar and a magazine from the corner store, a cleaned house and a cooked dinner.
✓ A beautiful bouquet of tulips is fine, but just for once one that was NOT stolen from her garden.
✓ Last year’s belated Mothers Day gift … which seems to have never arrived.
✓ Hours of labor multiplied by years of service, expressed in dollars (rounded up).
– Adapted from, first published in ‘BS’ in 2015

Saturday is “Babysitters Day”, a good excuse to review …
✗ When prospective employers ask about your thoughts on discipline, you simply point to your 5-inch stiletto heels.
✗ Your bedtime story to the kids consists of telling them that ‘The Sandman’ will rip their faces off if they don’t go right to sleep.
✗ Your version of ‘Rock-a-Bye-Baby’ involves an actual tree top.
✗ You bring over some wild hyenas to watch the baby while you go out.
✗ You’ve been known to check a tyke’s temperature with a meat thermometer.
✗ Burping the baby involves a 6-pack of Bud and a beefy tostada.
✗ During a fun game with the kids, you scream: “Hey! Simon didn’t say ‘Breathe’!”

➠ In an interview, Victoria Beckham said: “…people can achieve anything through hard work.” (But it doesn’t hurt to have a full-time team of stylists, makeup artists, singing coaches, nutritionists, personal trainers, choreographers and plastic surgeons)
➠ I just read a study that claimed men are under the belief that women in red are open to sexual advances. (Which is EXACTLY what I told the judge about those “Teases” at Target!)
➠ I just read researchers have found that playing sports makes people more optimistic. (Unless you play for the Cincinnati Bengals!)
➠ Fact of the Day: Kissing helps prevent tooth decay. (A study clearly not conducted at an Arkansas Family Reunion!)
➠ Scientists say that people who eat vegetarian are 32% less likely to die of heart disease. (And 100% more likely to shove this fact in your face!)

Sock Mask:

Who’s the all-time best TV mom?

My Mom has gossip dyslexia. She talks in front of people’s backs.

Question:  14% of kids under the age of 12 say they think THIS is the hardest thing about being a Mommy. What is it?
Answer:  Taking care of Dad!

A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.


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