May 2 2017

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Tuesday, May 2, 2017           Edition: #5965

Good Morning, Sheetheads!

★ Val Kilmer shared for the first time that he is recovering from cancer. In October 2015, Kilmer vehemently denied that he had a tumor after being spotted at the UCLA Medical Center. A few months later, he was seen with what looked to be a tracheostomy tube around his neck. The 57-year-old actor participated in a Reddit AMA (Ask Me Anything) on Wednesday.  He claims to now be cancer-free, although his tongue is still swollen.
★ It’s one of the most iconic films in movie history.  But Al Pacino has revealed he thought ‘The Godfather’ would be a flop and had to drown his sorrows with his co-stars during filming. At a 45th anniversary screening at Tribeca Film Festival in New York, Pacino  said that he drunkenly believed they were making ‘worst film ever’. He made the remarks while joined by Robert De Niro and Diane Keaton for a Q&A at Radio City Music Hall.
(Revenge is a dish best served cold?)
★ An Ohio family says they learned just 20 minutes before dinner this week that a planned mystery guest would be Facebook founder and billionaire Mark Zuckerberg.  Zuckerberg dined Friday with the Moore family in Newton Falls.  The story goes that Zuckerberg had asked his staff to find Democrats who voted for President Donald Trump. Not all the dinner chat was political. Daniel Moore says he and his wife, Lisa, talked about their work with an orphanage in Uganda and that Zuckerberg says he’s now planning a fundraiser to benefit the orphans.
(And you thought YOU had privacy concerns about Facebook!)
★ An anonymous hacker carried through on a threat to leak stolen ‘Orange Is the New Black’  episodes after Netflix ignored the hacker’s ransom request. The first 10 episodes of the upcoming season were uploaded to the popular file-sharing website The Pirate Bay on Saturday, one day after the hacker, who goes by the username “thedarkoverlord,” posted the first episode.
(How much you wanna bet ‘thedarkoverlord’ lives in his parents’ basement?)
-US Magazine
★ Busy Philipps admitted via an Instagram Story video that she makes more money now from sponsored Instagram posts than she does acting.  The ‘Vice Principals’ actress says that she only chooses things that she genuinely likes to promote, like the craft store ‘Michaels’.
(Sooo, how much could I make with my 8 followers?)
-US Magazine

•”Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global):  Will Arnett, Tommy Maitland, Incubus
•”The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV):  Chris Rock, Andy Cohen, Phoenix
•”The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global):  Amy Schumer, Gabourey Sidibe
•”Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV):  Rachel Maddow, Beck Bennett, All Time Low, Josh Dion
•”Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV):  Liev Schreiber, Ocean Park Standoff
•”Conan” (TBS/Comedy):  Kristin Chenoweth, Jonathan Banks, Highasakite
•”Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo):  Bobby Giancola, Hannah Ferrier
•”The View” (ABC/CTV):  LeAnn Rimes
•”Live with Kelly” (ABC/CTV):  Kurt Russell, Beth Behrs
•”The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV):  Wanda Sykes
•”Wendy Williams” (FOX):  Gabourey Sidibe, Jessica Seinfeld
•”Harry” (NBC/CTV):  Rachel Dratch, Jenna Elfman, Fantasia, Michael Psilakis
•”The Real” (FOX):  Chandra Wilson, guest co-host Joseline Hernandez
•”The Voice” (NBC): “Live Top 11 Eliminations” America’s vote reveals the top 10 artists; Alisan Porter performs.
•”2017 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony” (HBO) Inductees include Joan Baez, Electric Light Orchestra, Journey, Pearl Jam, Tupac Shakur and Yes.

• Prince’s – his ex-wife has shared a loving tribute written to mark the one-year anniversary of the superstar’s death, insisting his legacy has ensured he will “always be with us.” Mayte Garcia, who was married to Prince for four years until 2000, recently sat down to pour out her feelings about her ex in a touching message for fans, which she describes as a “love letter to his legacy.”
• Whitney Houston – A biopic about her daughter Bobbi Kristina Brown is in the works.  The small-screen project will air this summer.  The aspiring singer and actress was found unconscious in a bathtub in January of 2015 and died the following July at 22.
• Gwen Stefani – had to bow out of her scheduled headlining performance at the annual ‘Keep Memory Alive: Power of Love Gala’ after rupturing her eardrum. Stefani sought medical attention in Los Angeles but it is unclear if she was admitted to hospital.
• Journey –  Lost in the excitement surrounding Steve Perry at Journey’s Rock and Roll Hall of fame induction  was the news that original lead singer Gregg Rolie revealed that he and Neal Schon have been discussing working together again.
•Rascal Flatts – will release their newest studio album, ‘Back to Us’, on May 19. The 10-track record was produced by band member Jay DeMarcus. He calls producing his own band “a huge honor and a huge responsibility, and I don’t take it lightly.”
• Lonely Island – Amid news of the debacle that was the Fyre Festival, a meant-to-be lavish music festival on a secluded Bahamian island that ended in a disaster of unpreparedness and harsh tropical conditions, Seth Rogen and The Lonely Island (Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaffer) announced on Twitter that they have been working on a film project with a very similar plot.  Rogan Tweeted: “This seems like a good time to mention the movie we are making with about a music festival that goes HORRIBLY WRONG”, while Lonely Island’s Twitter account chimed in with “For real, thinking about suing #FyreFestival for stealing our idea”.


• “Rings” (PG-13 Drama, Horror): A young woman finds herself on the receiving end of a terrifying curse that threatens to take her life in seven days.  (Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz, Alex Roe, Johnny Galecki)
• “A Dog’s Purpose” (PG Adventure, Drama):  A dog looks to discover his purpose in life over the course of several lifetimes and owners.  (Josh Gad, Dennis Quaid, Peggy Lipton)
• “Gold” (R-Rated Drama): A prospector desperate for a lucky break teams up with a similarly eager geologist and sets off on a journey to find gold in the uncharted jungle of Indonesia.  (Matthew McConaughey, Edgar Ramírez, Bryce Dallas Howard)
• “I Am Not Your Negro” (PG-13 Documentary) Writer James Baldwin tells the story of race in modern America with his unfinished novel, ‘Remember This House’.  (Samuel L. Jackson, James Baldwin, Harry Belafonte)
• “The Resurrection Of Gavin Stone” (PG Comedy): A washed-up former child star, forced to do community service at a local megachurch, pretends to be a Christian to land the part of Jesus in their annual Passion Play, only to discover that the most important role of his life is far from Hollywood.  (Brett Dalton, Anjelah Johnson-Reyes, Neil Flynn)
• “The Shadow Effect” (Not Rated Action Thriller): A young man’s life is turned upside down when his violent dreams begin to blend with reality.  (Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Michael Biehn, Cam Gigandet)

Stand on the right, walk on the left.  It’s the ‘Rule of the Escalator’.  But maybe not for very much longer.  On the surface, it works.  It allows those who’d prefer to let the machinery do all the work relax to one side while those in a hurry squeeze by on the left.  A China subway system has announced a campaign to abolish standard escalator behavior. Because the vast majority of Chinese commuters prefer to stand, the equipment is wearing unevenly. About 95% of the escalators have severe damage on their right side, from the sheer weight and traffic of people catching a ride there.  So now the official line is that they hope that people will change their habits and move along as the escalator moves them along.  A similar initiative in London was aimed at increasing capacity rather than saving wear on equipment.  But commuters in both cities are resistant to change, and fear that others will think of them as rude if they don’t ‘stand to the right’.
(Hey, on a subway….I’ve seen a LOT ruder!)
(I always thought that in London, it would be stand left, walk right….)

Imagine that you are looking for support for a cause that you care about.  Or charity sponsorship for an event that you are taking part in.  Are you better off emailing your contacts…or asking in person?  According to a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, despite the reach of email, asking in person is the significantly more effective approach; you need to ask six people in person to equal the power of a 200-recipient email blast. Still, most people tend to think the ‘email ask’ will be more effective.  Researchers found that people tend to overestimate the power of their persuasiveness via text-based communication, and underestimate the power of their persuasiveness via face-to-face communication.  In short, a face-to-face request is 34 times more successful than an email.  These findings are consistent with previous research showing that people are more likely to comply with requests in person than over email.
(But I can’t spam all my friends at once in person!)
(Request recipients, however, much prefer to be asked via email than in person!)
(I wish all my boss’s requests came via email, then I’d never see him!)

Call someone one of these today…they won’t know what hit them:

• Gobermouch – This is an old Irish term for someone who likes to meddle in other people’s business. A busybody.
•  Gnashnab – an 18th century English word, meaning someone who just complains all the time. Contemporary synonyms include nitpicker, moaner and grumbler. No one likes a gnashnab.
•  Snoutband – someone who always interrupts a conversation to correct or contradict the person speaking. You just thought of someone, didn’t you?
• Stampcrab – Someone who is clumsy and heavy of foot. It sounds like a good band name, doesn’t it?
•   Scobblelotcher – Probably derived from ‘scopperloit,’ an old English dialect word for a vacation or a break from work.” A scobberlotcher is someone who avoids hard work like it’s their job. (Workin’ hard at hardly workin’)
•   Zooterkins – This is “a 17th century variant of ‘zounds’ which was an expression of surprise or indignation.” It’s less of an insult and more of something to yell after someone has insulted you.
(Whisper it for greater effect)


1952 [65] Christine Baranski, Buffalo NY, TV actress (‘Diane Lockhart’ on “The Good Wife” 2009-16)/movie actress (“Mamma Mia!”)
1955 [62] Donatella Versace, Reggio di Calabria, Italy, fashion designer (Vice-President & Chief Designer, Versace Group)/scary plastic surgery victim/sister of late designer Gianni Versace
1972 [45] Dwayne Johnson (‘The Rock’), Hayward CA, movie actor (“Fast & Furious” films, “San Andreas”)/6?-5?, 272-lb WWE wrestler (1996-2004, 2011-13)
1975 [42] David Beckham, London UK, retired soccer star (Paris Saint-Germain, LA Galaxy, Real Madrid, Manchester United)/wed to ex-Spice Girl Victoria Adams in 1999/father to Brooklyn, Romeo, Cruz, and Harper Seven
1980 [37] Ellie Kemper, Kansas City MO, TV actress (title role in “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” since 2015, “The Office” 2009-13)
1985 [32] Lily Allen (Lily Rose Cooper), London UK, pop singer (“Somewhere Only We Know”, “Smile”)
1985 [32] Kyle Busch, Las Vegas NV, NASCAR driver (most wins in all 3 of NASCAR’s national touring series combined with 161/younger brother of NASCAR driver Kurt Busch
2015 [2] Princess Charlotte, London England, Royalty (The second child and first daughter of England’s Prince William and his wife Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge)

• “Brothers and Sisters Day!”, a day to let siblings know you care. (Or maybe to add up all the times you got ratted on, had your hair pulled or your dessert stolen … and get even!)
• “Play Your Ukulele Day”, when you’re encouraged to play a ukulele, share your ukulele, and teach someone else how to play.
• “Life Insurance Day” The anniversary of the first day life insurance became available in the United States in 1759.
• “Truffle Day” Celebrating the chocolate confectionery traditionally made with a chocolate ganache center coated in chocolate, icing, cocoa powder, chopped nuts or coconut.
• “World Asthma Day” An annual event organized by the Global Initiative for Asthma (GINA) to improve asthma awareness and care around the world.

[Wed] Chocolate Custard Day
[Wed] Two Different Colored Shoes Day
[Thurs] Bird Day
[Thurs] Star Wars Day!

2004 [13] On the cover of “TV Guide”: “So Long, Friends 1994-2004″ (the entire cast of the long-running sitcom is featured inside)

2008 [09] 33-year-old Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger is sentenced to a 1-year ban from driving due to a DUI conviction in Vancouver BC after being caught speeding in his Lamborghini

2009 [08] Bob Dylan takes a day off from his European tour and, along with 13 other tourists, takes a bus trip to visit John Lennon’s childhood home in Liverpool UK (he is not recognized)

2000 [17] President Bill Clinton announces that GPS access will no longer be restricted to the US military (now it’s in your phone, in your car, everywhere!)

2008 [09] “Iron Man”, the latest big-budget action film based on a Marvel Comics character, debuts in some 4,100 theaters in the US and Canada, raking in $32.5 million on opening day

2012 [05] A pastel version of “The Scream” by Norwegian painter Edvard Munch sells for $120 million in a NYC auction, setting a new world record for an auctioned work of art


• Where the heck does the ‘o’ come from when we abbreviate the word ‘number’ to ‘no.’?
• Shouldn’t  a ‘French kiss’ involve pecking someone on each cheek?
• Did Noah keep his bees in ‘archives’?
• What is the opposite of ‘medium’?
• Is ‘crumby’ bread good or bad?

• Don’t throw a brick straight up.
• The stuff on the bottom of your shoe is not for internal consumption.
• If you’re riding a bicycle down a hill, turn your head before you spit.
• When using a Weed Whacker, don’t hold the end with the wire.
• Your body has the correct number of holes in it. Don’t make any more.
• When sticking thumb tacks into bulletin boards, press on the flat end.
• Under no circumstances should you ever reproduce.
– First published in “BS” 2001.

What do you send to a sick florist?

☎If you where asked to teach a class, what class would you teach?

Question: THIS happens 3 million times a minute. What is it?
Answer: Someone likes something on Facebook.

Someone else is happy with less than you have.

Mark Wesley@ 4CC Gladstone Australia; Garry Holden@Phucket Vibe, Thailand; Steph Loe@ KZZY Devils Lake, ND;  Dave Vincent@WPHL-TV Tuscon AZ

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