Wednesday, May 28, 2025 — Edition: #7721

Sheet Happens!

 

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Tom Cruise’s “Tropic Thunder” character ‘Les Grossman’ is ready for a comeback. During an interview to promote “Mission: Impossible: The Final Reckoning”, director Christopher McQuarrie said he and Cruise have had discussions about making a standalone Les Grossman movie. Quote: “The conversations we’ve had about Les Grossman are so (freaking) funny…We’re having very serious conversations about it, and how best to do it.”
-People
★ Olympic gold medalist Mary Lou Retton was arrested earlier this month for DUI in West Virginia. The former Olympian was arrested on May 17 for “driving under influence of alcohol, controlled substances, or drugs,” according to the West Virginia Magistrate Court system. Retton is facing a misdemeanor count of DUI, and she posted $1,500 bond the day of her arrest. Retton is the first American woman to win a gold medal in individual all-around gymnastics. Her arrest came 2 years after she was in the ICU with a rare form of pneumonia.
-NYPost
★ Things at “The Kelly Clarkson Show” are still murky. Clarkson is reportedly considering exiting the show at the end of this season, and show staff say the mood of the show has grown increasingly unhappy. Her NBC contract expires next year, and things have been amiss since early Spring, when Clarkson missed multiple shows, citing “personal reasons.” Staffers say her behavior has become erratic, and she’s left them on edge regarding their jobs, with the fear the show could “collapse at any moment.” One report says NBC execs have already begun looking for a replacement, with former “Today Show” host Hoda Kotb at the forefront.
-PopCulture
★ HBO’s “The Last of Us” Season 2 finale aired to half the audience that tuned into the Season 1 finale of the video game adaptation. Sunday’s season closer saw 3.7 million cross-platform viewers. That’s down 55% from the Season 1 finale, which scored 8.2 million cross-platform viewers. The Season 1 ender was an especially impressive feat, given that it aired opposite the Oscars. HBO cautions that the Season 2 finale viewership is expected to grow due to low tune-ins over the holiday weekend.
-TheWrap
★ World champion competitive eater Joey Chestnut went kernel-to-kernel with his own popcorn eating record — and shocker: he buttered it up and smashed it! Chestnut went full snack attack at the South Terre Haute Rural King in Indiana on Memorial Day, where, according to the popcorn pros, he inhaled 42 servings in just 8 minutes. The man’s been out-snacking himself for years — 3 years ago, Guinness confirmed he downed 32 servings of 24-ounce popcorn in 8 minutes … breaking his own previous record of 28.5. Chestnut has more than 55 eating world records and 16 Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest titles under his belt. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2wm924eh
-TMZ

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Seth Meyers, Sen. Cory Booker, Blues Traveler, Gin Blossoms
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Blake Shelton, Desi Lydic (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Ryan Reynolds, Rep. Jasmine Crockett (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Tiffany Haddish, Leslie Bibb (R)
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Arden Myrin, Esther Povitsky, Randy Sklar (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Julianne Moore, Ashley Tisdale
• “Today” (NBC): Sarah Silverman, Heather McMahan
• “GMA3” (ABC): Lori Bergamotto shares tips for using oat milk in your favorite recipes.
• “Live with Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Sarah Silverman, Ashley Tisdale
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Elizabeth Banks, Josh Holloway, Randy Rainbow
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Jo Koy, Demi Lovato (R)
• “Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Chloe Fineman
•  “Raid the Cage” (CBS): Season 2 premiere
• “Adults” (FX): Series premiere. A group of twentysomething friends in New York City navigate the awkward and sometimes absurd realities of adulthood.
• “Implosion: The Titanic Sub Disaster” (DSC): The extraordinary story of the June 2023 explosion of OceanGate submersible implosion; what led to the disaster, with exclusive access to the investigation and never-before-seen video of the day.
• “NHL Playoffs” (SN, CBC, TNT): Conference final Game 5: Florida @ Carolina
• “NBA Playoffs” (ESPN, SN): Conference final game 5: Minnesota @ Oklahoma

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Lorde – crashed a Sydney nightclub hosting a party dedicated to…Lorde. Footage from the event, dubbed “What Was That: A Club Night Dedicated to Lorde”, shows the singer, who is currently on tour in Australia, mixing in the crowd, until the club explodes into chaos as the crowd realizes she is among them. Lorde soon finds herself on the stage, dancing along to her songs with fans. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mr36wkuh
• Ed Sheeran – is officially a Brooklynite. He bought a Brooklyn Heights condo for $12 million, after previously renting a unit in the same waterfront building. The 3,400-square-foot apartment features 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms and a terrace.
• Spice Girls — Mel B is “confident” the girl group will embark on a 30th anniversary tour next year. When asked if a tour would involve the entire group, she said: “Your guess is as good as mine right now. I’m always game. Always.” The last time all 5 Spice Girls performed together was at the 2012 Olympics in London – and their last tour as a full band was in 2008.
• Sublime — have announced its plans to host a Sin City musical gathering. August 14-16, they will host “Fear, Loathing, and Sublime in Las Vegas”, along with guests including Pennywise, The Vandals, The Ataris, Long Beach Dub Allstars, and Jesse James Pariah & Zayno, at Park MGM.
• Neil Young — revisited one of his most personal songs during a special benefit show Friday in the small town of Lakefield ON. He delivered his first live performance of ‘My Boy’ in more than 4 decades. The 1985 banjo-led ballad is a tribute to Young’s eldest son, Zeke.
• John Fogerty and Eric Church – teamed up for an updated version of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s 1970 hit ‘Up Around the Bend’, which was used as the theme for Prime Video’s coverage of NASCAR racing. A promo featuring the new rendition premiered Sunday, coinciding with the first NASCAR Cup Series race to stream on Prime, the Coca-Cola 600. There’s also an edit featuring just Church. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3ccwxeam
• Scotty McCreery – His new single ‘Bottle Rockets’ features a sample of the 1994 Hootie & the Blowfish hit ‘Hold My Hand’. Scotty said it came about “naturally”, when he was jamming with songwriting partner Frank Rogers. Quote: “I…mentioned how much I loved Hootie & the Blowfish, and Frank being…a frequent collaborator with Darius (Rucker) knew exactly what to do with that.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/56rca6aj
• Luke Combs – Little known fact: Before Megan Moroney became a star, she appeared in his ‘Beer Never Broke My Heart’ music video. When Combs realized that both were performing at Boston Calling 2025 over the weekend, he knew they had to do something together. She joined him onstage during his performance of that song, and sang the second verse while Combs cheered her on.

SHOOTING THE BULL

PAUSE THE PINGS, DO THE THINGS:
The workday can feel like a constant barrage of distractions—emails, meetings, messages—coming at you non-stop. And if that’s what it feels like to you, you’d be right. According to a recent report by Microsoft, workers are interrupted, on average, every 2 minutes. And that’s not even counting Spotify, YouTube, or WhatsApp. So, what can you do if these “added layers of noise”, as one expert put it, are constantly derailing your day? Here are some simple tips from those whose job it is to know: First, figure out when you’re most productive—maybe it’s 30 minutes mid-morning or right before lunch. Once you know your prime time, block it off on your calendar like it’s a can’t-miss meeting. No excuses. Another idea is to find your ideal work spot, whether that’s a quiet office, your cubicle with headphones, or even just a corner at home where everyone knows not to disturb you. And, yes, it’s important to note that focus doesn’t always happen at a desk. One expert says she swears by her daily 45-minute run, because her best ideas come when she’s away from her screen.
(Every 2 minutes? My distractions are more punctual than I am!)
(BRB, scheduling my new meeting: ‘Staring into space.’)
-CNBC

THE MATING GAME:
According to the old stereotype, when men are searching for a partner, they prefer to date younger women. But according to new research, women do too. In a massive study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, researchers at UC Davis and other universities tracked over 6,000 people on more than 4,500 blind dates. They found that both men and women show a modest but equal preference for younger partners during blind dates. It was also found that a person’s stated age preference turned out to have little to no effect on actual attraction, even when dates exceeded their maximum age limits. And despite the fact that both men and women were attracted to younger partners equally, successful long-term matches still tended to involve older-male/younger-female combos. The researchers believe this may be related to external factors, such as societal norms.
(Why are none of these people trying to find a partner based on what REALLY matters: Money!)
(So, what they’re basically saying is that nobody wants to date anyone who is old enough to remember dial-up internet? Or am I getting that wrong?)
-StudyFinds

PAYCATION:
Summer’s coming – and it’s time to start thinking about vacation planning. And unless you’re like me, and your wife has already told you where you’re going, what you’re doing, and when, here are a few guidelines to help you put together an awesome holiday, according to a new survey. The poll of 2,000 travelers in the US found the “perfect” vacation lasts 11 days, takes place 3 hours from home, and costs $8,807 per person. People said the top destinations for a summer getaway are sunny beaches (63%), the great outdoors (53%), major cities (43%), historic locations (42%) and amusement parks (30%). Top priorities for a perfect vacation are: the food, relaxing, their hotel, and the local weather. The #1 factor that can derail an otherwise perfect vacation is running into unexpected costs (45%). That was closely followed by travel hiccups, local weather, and bad food.
(My perfect vacation is 11 days of not hearing the phrase, “Do we have snacks?”)
($8,807?! I’ll just turn on a fan, watch a beach volleyball game, and Venmo myself the savings!)
-Talker

THE WORLD’S HAPPIEST CITIES:
The 2025 index, as calculated by the Institute for Quality of Life, using a calculation involving 82 factors, including the newly-introduced indicators: Mental Health, Safety, Nutrition, and Work-Life Balance…
1. Copenhagen, Denmark (happiness score: 1039)
2. Zurich, Switzerland (993)
3. Singapore, Singapore (979)
4. Aarhus, Denmark (958)
5. Antwerp, Belgium (956)
6. Seoul, South Korea (942)
7. Stockholm, Sweden (941)
8. Taipei, Taiwan Region (936)
9. Munich, Germany
10. Rotterdam, Netherlands (920)
[***Other Bull Sheet countries with cities in the top 50: Vancouver Canada (#11), Helsinki Finland (14), Aalborg Denmark (15), New York USA (17), Geneva Switzerland (20), Oslo Norway (23), Dublin Ireland (24), Roskilde Denmark (26), Reykjavik Iceland (27), Aukland New Zealand (29), Adelaide Australia (29), Minneapolis USA (30), London UK (31), San Diego USA (34), Amsterdam Netherlands (35), Utrecht Netherlands (37), Randers Denmark (40), Washington USA (43), Holstebro Denmark (44), Ballerup Denmark (45), Basel Switzerland (47), Endhoven Netherlands (50)***]
LINK: https://happy-city-index.com/
-HappyCity

DID YOU KNOW?
Who do you trust? A new study has revealed that we consistently place more trust in those who grew up poor, as opposed to those raised wealthy. But when it comes to someone’s current financial situation, we trust a person less if they’re struggling now, even though we’re more likely to help them out. The University of British Columbia study exposes a quirk in human psychology that affects everything from job interviews to business deals, to everyday interactions. We seem to believe that childhood poverty builds character – but current financial hardship suggests someone might be desperate enough to betray our trust. (So basically, you’re only trustworthy if you used to eat ramen by necessity, not if you STILL do?)
-StudyFinds

BS CHRONOMETER 05.28.25

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Hamburger Day”, a day to celebrate one of the cornerstone foods of Western civilization – the hamburger! While it was invented in Germany, its popularity spread like wildfire throughout the US and Canada. (What burger topping can you absolutely NOT do without? And what one is a dealbreaker?)
• “Amnesty International Day”, commemorating the 1961 launch of ‘Appeal for Amnesty’ which evolved into what became known as “A.I.” long before Artificial Intelligence was a thing. The organization strives to protect human rights around the world by publicizing problems and encouraging citizens and governments to take action. LINK: https://www.amnesty.org/en/
• “Brisket Day”. Brisket is a tricky meat in that it comes from the animal tough, but if you find a particularly well-marbled piece and cook it correctly, it will become fork-soft and simply peel apart, making it the tenderest of tender meats. (Whoops! Drooled just a bit there…)
• “Senior Health and Fitness Day”, promoting the value of fitness and exercise for mature adults. ‘Seniors Games’ are scheduled in some cities, and more than 100,000 seniors are expected to participate this year. LINK: https://www.fitnessday.com/
• “Slugs Return From Capistrano Day”. This holiday is a parody of “Swallows Return to Capistrano” or “Swallows Day” in March, when swallows migrate to Capistrano. On this occasion, the slugs that have been living in the beautiful Mission San Juan Capistrano supposedly leave their winter haven and go back to the gardens and yards they came from.
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Learn About Composting Day
[Thurs] Paper Clip Day
[Fri] World MS Day
[Sat] Smile Day
This Week is…African Violet Week
This Month is…Tennis Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1944 [81] Gladys Knight, Oglethorpe GA, soul singer (Gladys Knight & the Pips-‘Midnight Train to Georgia’, ‘If I Were Your Woman’)

1945 [80] John Fogerty, Berkeley CA, rock singer/guitarist (‘Centerfield’, w/CCR-‘Proud Mary’, ‘Lookin’ Out My Back Door’) Rock Hall of Fame (with CCR), 1993

1964 [61] Phil Vassar, Lynchburg VA, country singer-songwriter (‘Just Another Day in Paradise’, ‘In a Real Love’)

1968 [57] Kylie Minogue, Melbourne Australia, pop singer (‘The Locomotion’, ‘Can’t Get You Out of My Head’)/movie actress (“Moulin Rouge”)

1971 [54] Duncan Jones, London England, movie director/producer (“Moon”, “Source Code”)/son of David Bowie

1977 [48] Elisabeth Hasselbeck (Filarski), Cranston RI, TV co-host (“FOX & Friends” 2013-15, “The View” 2003-13)/reality TV contestant (“Survivor: The Australian Outback” 2001)

1978 [47] Jake Johnson, Evanston IL, TV actor (“New Girl” 2011-18, “Minx” 2022-2023)

1985 [40] Colbie Caillat, Newbury Park CA, pop singer (‘Brighter Than the Sun’, ‘Bubbly’)

1985 [40] Carey Mulligan, London England, movie actress (“The Great Gatsby”, “Drive”)

1995 [30] Lukas Gage, San Diego CA, TV actor (“The White Lotus” 2021, “Euphoria” 2019) COMING UP…”Love Language”

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1998 [27] Actor/comedian Phil Hartman (“SNL”) is murdered by his wife while sleeping at age 49.

2010 [15] Gary Coleman, the child star of 1970s sitcom “Diff’rent Strokes”, dies at 42, 2 days after suffering a brain hemorrhage.

2014 [11] Maya Angelou, author of “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” and many other works, dies of natural causes at age 86 at her home in Winston-Salem NC.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2007 [18] The Police set aside their differences and launch their first tour since 1986 in Vancouver. Despite some clashes along the way, the tour lasts over a year, selling 3.3 million tickets to 151 shows.

2014 [11] Apple pays $3 billion for Beats Electronics, the music company and headphone-maker started by music producer Jimmy Iovine and rapper Dr. Dre.

THIS DAY IN SPORTS . . .
2006 [19] Barry Bonds hits his 715th career home run, passing Babe Ruth on the MLB all-time list (…with a huge asterisk…).

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1934 [91] Near Callander, Ontario, the Dionne quintuplets are born to Olivia and Elzire Dionne, the first quints to survive infancy.

2002 [23] The ‘Mars Odyssey’ robotic spacecraft finds signs of large ice deposits on Mars.

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1987 [38] Paul Pearman jumps over 21 barrels … on a skateboard (Augusta GA).

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ The standard way for Russians to answer the telephone is: “I’m listening”.
✓ Mercury thermometers are useless in Antarctica be cause it is so cold that the mercury freezes.
✓ Besides black and yellow, bees can also be red, green and blue.
✓ The most-common given name in the world is believed to be Muhammad, with an estimated 150 million men sharing the name.
✓ The Incredible Hulk was supposed to be grey, but due to ink problems where the comic was printed, he turned out green.
✓ A plastic knife cuts brownies more smoothly than a metal knife.
-BathroomReadersInstitute, Facts

Best of BS . . .
BS SIGNS IT’S TIME TO MOW YOUR LAWN:
• You can no longer see in the neighbors’ bedroom window … their 2nd-floor bedroom window.
• You’re reading a new how-to book called ‘Inexpensive Lawn Care Through Asphalt’.
• You have to keep the dog on a leash in the backyard or you lose sight of him.
• Postal workers use a machete to deliver your mail.
• Your landscaping consultant recommends use of an upside-down helicopter.
• To get the newspaper, you have to organize a search team.
• You bump into something on the way out to the car and realize it’s the kids’ swing set.
• You start to hear growling sounds similar to the ones on the National Geographic special on the Savannas.
• The FedEx guy has woven the grass over the sidewalk into an artistic arch so he can get to the front door.
• You see your kids laying down a trail of bread crumbs as they leave the house.
-First published in BS in 2010

BS WHY I’M ALWAYS LATE:
• I have developed and perfected the rare skill of turning off my alarm in my sleep.
• Coffee is more important to me than being on time.
• People drive too slow.
• I hate where I’m going more than I hate where I’ve been.
• It’s hard to make a grand entrance when you’re on time.
• I thought you said Thursday.
• That one time I was early for something, I had to wait for all the stragglers to show up.
• There was an incident. It involved a toddler and a diaper. That’s all you need to know.
• I KNEW I should have taken that left toin at Albuquerque.
• Hey! I’m here. Whattdaya want?
• I have cats to serve.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2018

BS WEB GOODIE:
The sounds are as funny as the falls:  https://tinyurl.com/mm52b8t5

BS RANDOM JOKE:
My ex called me from prison. She said: “You know how we used to finish each other’s sentences?”

BS THREEZER:
(Give contestant the clues, they tell you what all 3 have in common…)
• Instant, Hidden, Candid
Answer: They are all cameras

•  Cowboy, Combat, Go-go
Answer: They are all boots

•  Rain, Petrified, Sherwood
Answer: They are all forests
-DaveArch

☎ BS PHONE STARTER:
What are some red flags and green flags for a new friendship?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
More than 80% of people agree: eating THIS puts them in a better mood. What is it?
Answer:  Watermelon

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Rough diamonds may be sometimes mistaken for worthless pebbles.