November 13, 2012

Tuesday, November 13, 2012        Edition: #4867

Thanks a Sheetload for Choosing “BS”!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Globally, the latest ‘Bond’ film “Skyfall” has now earned over $518 million since first hitting international theaters October 26th (it only needs to surpass $586 million to become the biggest ‘Bond’ of all-time, eclipsing “Quantum of Solace”) . . . Actress Kristen Stewart tells “Hollywood Reporter” she’s confident she’ll be starring in the planned “Snow White & The Huntsman” sequel (despite the fact she allegedly boinked the director) . . . Actress Kate Walsh is writing a sitcom about her life with her boyfriend & his kids (wonder if her “Private Practice” co-stars are ticked she singlehandedly cancelled the show by quitting?) . . . Not only did Eddie Cibrian publicly humiliate Brandi Glanville by cheating on her with Leann Rimes, the “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” star says he also left her penniless as years of overspending left them with meager savings when they divorced (hard to believe, he seems so reliable) . . . Kevin Clash, the puppeteer behind ‘Elmo’ since 1985, has taken a leave of absence from “Sesame Street” amid allegations he had a relationship with a 16-year-old boy (well just look where he’s been shoving his right arm for the last 27 years) . . . And global phenomenon PSY is in London this week where he’s picked up a plaque from Guinness World Records recognizing “Gagnam Style” as the ‘Most Liked’ all-time video on YouTube with a massive 4,911,081 likes recorded, blowing away #2, LMFAO’s “Party Rock Anthem”, at a paltry 1.5 million (if you add in all the “Gagnam Style” spin-offs and parodies, it’s more like 10-billion).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Dancing With the Stars All-Stars” (ABC/CTV2) – Kylie Minogue (“The Abbey Road Sessions”) performs; Ne-Yo (“R.E.D.”) performs; 2 couples are eliminated.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Ne-Yo again.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Youngblood Hawke (“Youngblood Hawke”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Ceremony (“Zoo”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Toby Keith (“Hope On the Rocks”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Lee Brice (“Hard 2 Love”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Mumford & Sons (“Babel”).
• “The Talk” (CBS) – Toby Keith again.
• “Today Show” (NBC) – One Direction (“Take Me Home”, out today).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Gin Wigmore (“Holy Smoke”).
• “VH1’s Storytellers” (VH1) – Tonight P!nk (“The Truth About Love”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV) – Vocalists face elimination.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Amy Winehouse – The 4-disc box set “Amy Winehouse At the BBC” is out today, featuring 3 DVDs and 1 CD. The collection also includes a booklet featuring rare photographs.
• The Beatles – Today mobile Beatles pop-up shops in the form of customized double-decker buses hit the streets for a 1-day-only promotion in NYC and LA. They’re being deployed to celebrate today’s 180-gram vinyl LP release of The Beatles’ remastered studio albums.
• Christina Aguilera – Today she releases her new album “Lotus”, which she describes as being ‘multi-layered’.
• The Deftones – Today their 7th studio album “Koi No Yokan” is out, recorded in Los Angeles with producer Nick Raskulinecz.
• Green Day – “¡Dos!”, the 2nd album in their new 3-disc series, is out today. They’ve also moved up the release date of the final installment, “¡Tré!”, from January to December 11th.
• INXS – They’re splitting after 30 years in the biz. Drummer Jon Farriss broke the news to fans at a gig in Perth on Sunday, revealing that concert would be their last.
• Lana Del Rey – “Born To Die – The Paradise Edition” is released today, the original album plus 8 new tracks. A ‘Deluxe Box Set’ includes a remix CD, a DVD, and 4 art prints.
• Rolling Stones – Today they offer up the new greatest hits collection “Grrr!”, available in various formats including a 3-CD, 50-track version and a 4-CD ‘Super-Deluxe’ set with 80 tracks. It spans their 5 decades as a band from their first single, a cover of Chuck Berry’s “Come On” issued in June 1963, to their newest tracks “Gloom & Doom” and “One Last Shot”.
• Soundgarden – Today’s the release date for “King Animal”, the reunited rockers’ first new studio album in over 15 years. To celebrate, they’re playing 3 intimate shows: tonight in NYC; Friday in Toronto, and November 27th in LA.
• Whitney Houston – “I Will Always Love You: The Best of Whitney Houston” is released today, featuring her greatest hits plus “I Look to You”, a new studio-manufactured duet with R Kelly. A special Grammy salute to the late singer airs Friday on CBS-TV.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Brave” ( PG Family Adventure ): Pixar’s 13th feature-length animated film is set in a mythical version of ancient Scotland, where a warrior princess wields her bow-and-arrow while battling a curse. Voice cast includes Kelly Macdonald, Billy Connolly, Emma Thompson, Craig Ferguson.
• “Paul McCartney: Live Kisses” (NR Music): A new live concert film shot in the intimate Capitol Studios in Los Angeles and originally streamed as a webcast to celebrate the release of his (unfortunately named) last album, “Kisses On the Bottom”.
• “Savages” ( R-Rated Crime Thriller ): In the latest from director Oliver Stone, Aaron Johnson & Taylor Kitsch play pot-growers who face off against the Mexican drug cartel that kidnapped their shared girlfriend (Blake Lively). Co-stars Benicio Del Toro, John Travolta, Salma Hayek.
• “The Watch” ( R-Rated Comedy ): An ensemble comedy from Ben Stiller about suburban dads who form a Neighborhood Watch group as a way to get out of their day-to-day routines. They soon find themselves defending Earth from alien invasion. Co-stars Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill.
• Also released today: “Buck Rogers In the 25th Century: Season 2” (Vintage TV); “The Incredible Mel Brooks: An Irresistible Collection Of Unhinged Comedy” (Compilation); “Let the Music Play: The Story Of the Doobie Brothers” (Music Doc); “Lost Girl: Season 2” (TV); “Patti Smith: Live at Montreux 2005” (Music Doc); “The Queen of Versailles” (Doc); “The Raw & The Cooked: A Culinary Journey Through Taiwan” (Doc); and “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Complete Classic Series Collection 23-Disc DVD Set” (Animation).

PERILS OF QUICK THINKING:
When we make hasty decisions, we tend to make more mistakes. Now, a new Vanderbilt University study on monkeys explains why – brain cells become hypersensitive to new information, even bad info, making us likelier to draw faulty conclusions. So when we try to do things too quickly, we tend to make more errors; but when we slow down, we tend to be more accurate. The study concludes that our brains see things differently when we have to make snap decisions. (Mention this to your surgeon … ahead of time.)
– NBCNews.com

MANEATING SEAFOOD:
The newest carnivore in the ocean looks just like … a candelabra? Scientists have discovered a meat-eating harp sponge, a long-limbed underwater organism, deep off California’s Monterey Bay. It ensnares crustaceans with its Velcro-like hooks, covers them in thin membranes, then slowly digests them. Biologist Lonny Lundsten says she and her colleagues were truly amazed as no one had ever seen this animal before. (The horror movie is likely already underway.)
– OurAmazingPlanet.com

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
• The Swedish town of Soderhamn has hit on a novel way to cut its unemployment figures … it’s paying young people to move to Norway. More than 100 have already found work after making the move. The local employment office claims it’s not sending it’s youth away, just helping them ‘take a step forward and have a richer experience’. (Hey, it works for Mexico.)
– “Times of London”
• A senior citizen has been arrested for allegedly flashing a fake badge and claiming to be an undercover cop to avoid the $100-entry fee at Epcot in the Walt Disney World Resort at Orlando, Florida. Cops say the 74-year-old flashed a badge identifying him as an ‘honorary member’ of the ‘American Federation of Police’. (Nice try, cottonhead.)
– NYPost.com
• The world’s first toilet-themed park has recently opened in Suwon, South Korea. The ‘Restroom Cultural Park’ is an oddball pit-stop for those interested in the history of the loo, dating back to ancient times. Suwon is also home to the annual ‘Golden Poop Art Festival’. (We say it’s just another tourist crap-trap.)
– QMI Agency

AGE AROMA:
There really is such as thing as ‘old-person smell’. But there’s also a distinctive middle-aged-person smell and a young-person smell, according to a recent study. The research has found that older people have a less intense – and more pleasant – scent than middle-aged folk and young whipper-snappers. Not what you expected, right? (If you ask us, only baby smell is worth snorting.)
– Condensed from RD.com

HERE’S THE DOWN-LOW ON B-O:
Why does armpit sweat smell worse than sweat from other places? Your body has 2 kinds of sweat glands. Most of those on your arms and legs secrete a mixture of water and salt. But the glands in your armpits (as well as your groin) release an oily substance, which bacteria love. It’s actually the bacteria eating the oil that releases the telltale stench. (This is the reason [co-host] can evacuate an entire fitness club simply by opening his gym bag.)
– “The Doctors”

DID YOU KNOW?
According to a new report from the UN Committee on World Food Security, as the climate warms, rice and wheat will become scarce. In their stead, scientists say, the smart money is on … bananas. (Hope you like banana bread!)
– “The Independent”

BS CHRONOMETER 11.13.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [58] Chris Noth, Madison WI, TV actor (‘Peter Florrick’ on “The Good Wife” since 2009, “Sex & The City” 1998-2004, “Law & Order” 1990-95)/movie actor (“Sex & The City” films)

1955 [57] Whoopi Goldberg (Caryn Johnson), NYC, TV personality (“The View” since 2007, “Hollywood Squares” 1998-2002)/movie actress (“Sister Act”, “Ghost”)

1967 [45] Jimmy Kimmel, Brooklyn NY, TV host (“Jimmy Kimmel Live” since 2003, “The Man Show” 1999-2003, “Win Ben Stein’s Money” 1997-2001)

1969 [43] Gerard Butler, Paisley, Scotland, movie actor (“Coriolanus”, “300”)  COMING UP: “How to Train Your Dragon 2” (2014).

1974 [38] Joe Principe, Chicago IL, punk rock bassist (Rise Against-“Wait For Me”, “Help Is On the Way”)

1978 [34] Nikolai Fraiture, NYC, rock bassist (The Strokes-“Juicebox”, “Hard to Explain”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Diwali” begins, a major Indian festival celebrated across the globe for 5 consecutive days at the end of the Hindu month Ashwayuja. During this time, homes are thoroughly cleaned and windows are opened to welcome ‘Laksmi’, goddess of wealth. Traditional earthen lamps and fireworks are symbols of the celebration.
NET: http://www.diwalifestival.org

• “Mix It Up at Lunch Day”, when kids in school cafeterias are encouraged to swap seats in order to bring together various cliques (jocks, geeks, goths, addicts, juvenile delinquents, etc), a project sponsored by the advocacy group Teaching Tolerance.
NET: http://www.tolerance.org/teens/lunch.jsp

• “World Kindness Day”. (Sponsored by the ‘Global Society of Eternally Hopeless Optimists’.)
NET: http://www.randomactsofkindness.org

• “Young Readers Day”, observed annually on the 2nd Tuesday of November, to remind us of the joys and importance of reading for young people.
NET: http://www.bookitprogram.com

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2000 [12] The Beatles release “1”, a 27-song compilation CD of #1 hits

2005 [07] Astronauts aboard the International Space Station are awakened by Paul McCartney singing “Good Day Sunshine” live from his concert in Anaheim, California

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1875 [137] 1st football teams to wear uniforms, Harvard vs Yale (before this … naked?)

1952 [60] 1st ‘Press-On Nails’ are marketed (and 1st guy is admitted to ER with gaping back wounds)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1995 [17] World’s only known ‘Green Cat’ is confirmed by a veterinary hospital in Copenhagen, Denmark, a condition vets say may be caused by a metabolism defect

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] Loosen Up, Lighten Up Day
[Wed] Universal Children’s Day
[Wed] World Diabetes Day
[Thurs] Guinness World Record Day
[Thurs] Use Less Stuff Day
[Fri] “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” opens in movie theaters
This Week Is … Hunger & Homeless Awareness Week
This Month Is … Impotency Month

BULL’S BITS


HORROR FILM QUOTE OR HORRIBLE FIRST DATE?
1. “We can take my dinghy out on the river tonight.”
2. “A boy’s best friend is his mother.”
3. “You eat like a bird.”
4. “I don’t really like music.”
5. “I get lonely when I’m by myself for hours.”
6. “I didn’t mean to pry.”
7. (On drink 5) “Would you mind if I have another drink?”
8. “You have a tight little body.”
9. “Welcome to Fright Night.”
10. “Here’s Johnny!”
[Horror film: 2, 9, 10. First date: 1, 4, 5, 7, 8. Both: 3, 6.]
– Thanks to Sarah Marcus

BS RANDOM JOKE:
If you die on an elevator, be sure to press the ‘UP’ button.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• Which movie did Whoopi Goldberg win a ‘Best Supporting Actress’ Oscar for?
a. “Sister Act”
b. “Ghost” [CORRECT. For her role as ‘Oda Mae Brown’ (1990).]
c. “Soapdish”
– IMDb.com

• Which is the top-selling spice in the world? Note that salt is not really a spice but a mineral.
a. Pepper [CORRECT. Peppercorns are, by monetary value, the most widely traded spice in the world, accounting for about 20% of all spice imports. Cumin, an ingredient in curry powder, is 2nd.]
b. Cinnamon
c. Jerk
– Wiki.answers.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What was the most useless piece of advice your parents ever gave you?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: THIS is the #1 movie people lie about having seen.
Answer: “Casablanca” (1942).

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Never leave anything to chance; make sure all your crimes are premeditated.

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