November 6, 2012

Tuesday, November 6, 2012        Edition: #4862

Nuthin’ Like a Bull in Your Radio Shop!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
25-year-old “Twilight Saga” actress Ashley Greene has a ‘no drunk tweeting rule’, refusing to post messages to her 1.85 million followers on Twitter after she’s had a few (y’know, this should be mandatory!) . . . “Twilight” star Kristen Stewart has snapped up a swanky $2.1-million home in the gated community of Laughlin Park, with views of downtown LA and the Pacific (will she be taking in a ‘boarder’?) . . . Imagine making this decision: Sharon Osbourne tells “Hello!” she’s undergone a double mastectomy as a ‘preventative measure’ after finding out she has the ‘breast cancer gene’ (quote: “I didn’t want to live under that cloud”) . . . Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver-turned-“Football Night in America” analyst Hines Ward has a guest role on an upcoming episode of “The Walking Dead” (AMC), playing one of the undead who’ve taken over a post-apocalyptic America (hope he doesn’t ‘fumble’ his lines) . . . After announcing he’s sold LucasFilm to Disney in a $4 billion-deal, it’s come to light that filmmaker George Lucas has signed on to fellow billionaires Bill Gates’ and Warren Buffett’s ‘Giving Pledge’, a promise to give away at least half their wealth by the time they die (hey, over here!).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – Word has it she doesn’t want to employ a nanny. After becoming a mother for the first time in October, she’s become besotted with her little ‘no-name’ and doesn’t want to turn over childcare to anyone else.
• Aerosmith – Today they release “Music From Another Dimension!”, their first new album since 2004 and their first release of all-new material since 2001.
• Alicia Keys – She’s revealed she keeps her Grammy Awards in a box because she can’t think what to do with them. The 31-year-old has picked up 14 of the prestigious doorstops.
• Kylie Minogue – The Brit pop star’s compilation album “The Abbey Road Sessions” is out today, featuring 16 of her classics, all radically reworked, spanning her 25-year career.
• Led Zeppelin – Denny Somach’s new book “Get the Led Out: How Led Zeppelin Became the Biggest Band In the World” is published today. It provides a behind-the-scenes look at their career, revealing quirky details, achievements and adventures. 27 rare interviews are included.
• Miranda Lambert – The country star is opening a store called Pink Pistol in Tishomingo, Oklahoma on ‘Black Friday’ (November 23rd). It will carry a variety of merchandise, including antiques, gifts, boots, and jeans.
• Mumford & Sons – Their new video for the track “Lover Of the Light”, the 2nd single from their “Babel’ album, was directed by actor Idris Elba (who played ‘Stringer Bell’ on “The Wire”). The idea for the clip was developed over a drinking session in a pub.
• Ne-Yo – The title of his new album “R.E.D.” is apparently an acronym for ‘Realizing Every Dream’. Even so, releasing it under that name in the wake of Taylor Swift’s mega-selling “Red” album seems like a poor marketing decision.
• Nirvana – Courtney Love denies she’s writing a musical based on Kurt Cobain as suggested by Britney Spears’ former ‘manager’ (dealer?) Sam Lutfi, who claimed to be collaborating on it. Love says, quote: “There will be no musical. Sometimes it’s best just to leave things alone.”
• Wu Tang Clan – In anticipation of next November’s 20th anniversary of their debut album, “Enter the Wu-Tang”, RZA plans to oversee a reunion of the 8-man crew. The man’s busy, most recently directing and starring in the movie “The Man With the Iron Fists”.

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Andy Grammer (“Andy Grammer”).
• “2012 Election Night” (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/PBS) – Your favorite show is pre-empted.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Arthur Christmas” ( PG Animated Comedy ): In this yuletide cartoon from Britain, James McAvoy voices the role of ‘Arthur’, the misfit son of Santa Claus who takes it upon himself to use his father’s hi-tech operation for an urgent mission. Voice cast also includes Bill Nighy, Hugh Laurie, and Jim Broadbent.
• Also released today: “Aim High: The Complete 1st Season” (TV); “Cornwall With Caroline Quentin” (Doc); “Entourage: The Complete Series” (TV); “High Ground” (Doc); “Javier Bardem 3-Film Collection” (Compilation); “Kung Fu Panda Holiday” (Animation); “The Life & Times of Grizzly Adams: Season 1” (Vintage TV); “Narrow Escapes of World War II” (Doc); “Rags & Riches Collection: The Films of Mary Pickford” (Compilation); “Rescue” (Doc); “Sesame Street: Old School 3” (Family); “SpongeBob SquarePants: It’s a SpongeBob Christmas!” (Family); “Universal 100th Anniversary Collection” (Compilation); “Warren Miller: Like There’s No Tomorrow” (Sports Doc); and “Wolf Lake: The Complete Series” (TV).

“TO A VERY SPECIAL ME”:
New research commissioned by Barclaycard has found that ‘self-gifting’ is on the rise. It seems that for many of us the only way to make sure we get the gift we want is to buy it for ourselves. A few highlights of the poll …
• 60% still believe it’s the thought that counts when it comes to gifts, but 1-in-6 would rather choose the gifts themselves.
• 48% of us have purchased our own gift for a special occasion.
• 23% do not trust family & friends to get the right presents.
• 10% of us always buy our own gifts.
Interestingly, nearly 1-in-4 of us expect to spend less on gifts for the family in the coming year. (Are you also cutting back on you?)
– “Daily Telegraph”

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
• It’s called appealing to stiffs! A Polish firm that makes coffins has angered the Catholic church by trying to drum up business with a calendar depicting sexy models posing next to its caskets. As well as attracting publicity, the calendar is meant to be a source of revenue. It’s on sale on the company’s website.
– Reuters.com
• Need proof no good deed goes unpunished? David Baker of Stourbridge, England spent 1 hour a day for 6 years picking up trash dropped on the street. But now he’s been fined $120 for dropping a pizza box and some junk mail into a public trash can because they’re considered ‘domestic waste’. Baker calls the charge ‘bureaucracy gone mad’.
– ExpressandStar.com
• It’s the cleaning fairy! A 53-year-old Westlake, Ohio woman has pleaded guilty to attempted burglary. Her crime? She admits to breaking into a home west of Cleveland, thoroughly cleaning it and then leaving a bill for $75 written on a napkin and including her phone number. She says she just ‘wanted something to do’. She’ll be sentenced later.
– CantonRep.com

SIGNS YOUR MARRIAGE NEEDS WORK:
According to couples retreat program director James Cordova, you know you have relationship work to do if you notice …
• Money Fights Are Fierce – Most people think these arguments are just about spending and saving, but they’re really about our emotional relationship with money. Find a middle ground that leaves you both content with the solution.
• You’re Always Snapping at Each Other – Constant bickering is a warning sign that you’re inadvertently stepping on each other’s toes, brushing over big issues that matter to you, or losing faith in each other. Choose you battles and look for compromises.
• Or the Opposite: You Avoid Conflict – Couples often don’t want to start a fight, so they skirt around something that bothers them. If it’s a behavior your partner can change, you’re doing the relationship no favors by ignoring it.
• Arguments Don’t End, They Just Fizzle Out – Many couples just walk away after a spat, hoping the negative feelings will settle. It’s important to deliberately re-approach your partner to make sure there’s no lasting damage, ie: “Okay, we disagree about this, but we’re fine.”
– Condensed from “Redbook Magazine”

ARE YOU DATING YOUR MOM?
Your wife or girlfriend probably shares some close similarities with the first woman you ever fell in love with … your mommy. For a recent study researchers at the University of Turku in Finland recruited 70 men and women and compared the face of each person’s spouse to the participant’s opposite-sex parent. The absolutely horrifying results – while the women’s husbands looked nothing like their fathers, the men were likely to end up with women who ‘significantly’ resembled their mothers. (You may now vomit.)
– “Men’s Health”

REGRETS, WE’VE HAD A FEW:
When we look back on our lives, what do we regret wasting time on most? According to a poll by Impulse Research …
✗ 67% regret wasting time worrying.
✗ 35% regret wasting time watching TV.
✗ 27% regret wasting time commuting.
✗ 19% regret wasting time cleaning & doing chores.
✗ 18% regret wasting time gossiping.
– HaLife.com

GONE IN 60 SECONDS:
There’s a new app being developed at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh called ‘Virtual Valet’ that will someday let your iPhone tell your car to park … without you in it. You pull up to the curb, push a button on your smartphone, and the car takes care of everything. Then you tell it to come back whenever you are done. To find its own parking spot, the system uses a sensor suite similar to those now found in some luxury cars. This includes a motion sensor that scans for moving cars and pedestrians, and a forward-facing laser rangefinder to determine the distance of objects in front of the car. (Coming soon: carjacking by remote control.)
– “New Scientist”

DID YOU KNOW?
Despite polls showing Barack Obama and Mitt Romney running neck and neck, Irish bookmaking firm Paddy Power is so sure the incumbent president will win, it’s already paying off customers who’ve bet on him. So far, it’s shelled out $800,000.
– NYPost.com

BS CHRONOMETER 11.06.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1946 [66] Sally Field (Mahoney), Pasadena CA, movie actress (“Lincoln”, Oscar-“Norma Rae”)/TV actress (“Brothers & Sisters” 2006-11)

1948 [64] Glen Frey, Detroit MI, classic rock musician (“The Heat is On”, The Eagles-“Hotel California”)

1955 [57] Maria Shriver, Chicago IL, Mrs Arnold Schwarzenegger 1986-2011/First Lady of California 2003-11/former TV journalist (“Dateline NBC” 1994-2004)

1970 [42] Ethan Hawke, Austin TX, movie actor (“Brooklyn’s Finest”, “Training Day”)

1972 [40] Rebbeca Romijn (pronounced ‘Romaine’ like the lettuce), Berkeley CA, movie actress (“X-Men” movies)/TV actress (“Ugly Betty” 2006-08)/fashion model (“Vogue”)

1972 [40] Thandie Newton, London UK, movie actress (“2012”, “W”)/TV actress (“ER” 2003-09)

1988 [24] Emma Stone, Scottsdale AZ, movie actress (“The Amazing Spider-Man” [released on video this Friday], “The Help”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “General Election Day” in America , always the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November. (In other words, if November begins on a Tuesday, it’s NOT an election day.)

• “International Day for Preventing the Exploitation Of the Environment in War & Armed Conflict”, a UN observance since 2001. (Kill people, not flowers!)
NET: http://www.un.org/depts/dhl/environment_war/index.html

• “Saxophone Day”, commemorating the 1814 birth of Belgium’s Adolphe Sax, inventor of the musical instrument named for him. Sax became wealthy inventing numerous musical instruments, but died in poverty in Paris in 1894.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2005 [07] Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons musical “Jersey Boys” opens on Broadway to rave reviews  BS FACTOID: Director Jon Favreau’s movie adaptation has been put on hold while producers search for a new studio. Production was scheduled to begin early next year but Warner Bros has backed out of the project.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1991 [21] Novelty hit “I’m Too Sexy” by Right Said Fred is released

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1867 [145] 1st ‘Parliament of Canada’ opens (and the 1st yelling during Question Period)

1925 [87] ‘Royal Canadian Legion’ established (because vets need a place with cheap booze)
NET: http://legion.ca/Poppy/campaign_e.cfm

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1993 [19] ‘Largest ‘PB & J Sandwich’ is made in Peanut, Pennsylvania (40-feet-long with 150 lbs of peanut butter & 50 lbs of grape jelly)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] International Tongue Twister Day
[Wed] Bittersweet Chocolate With Almonds Day
[Thurs] “Skyfall” opens in IMAX theaters
[Thurs] Cook Something Bold & Pungent Day
[Fri] “Skyfall” opens in conventional theaters
This Week is … Dear Santa Letter Week
This Month Is … Military Family Appreciation Month

BULL’S BITS


HOW CLOSE IS IT?
Colorful ways to describe how close today’s presidential election is in America …
✓ Today’s presidential election is tighter than Rush Limbaugh’s bike shorts.
✓ Tell grandma to take her teeth out of the glass, cuz this is a real nail-biter.
✓ Politics makes strange bedfellows and this election is so close, Obama and Romney may have to move bunk-beds into the Lincoln bedroom.
✓ This race is about as hard to call as a deaf hog up a sassafras tree.
✓ This thing is tighter than Joan River’s face, and damn near as frightening.
✓ This race is stickier than a pine cone enema on a hot night in the bayou.
✓ America just wanted a quickie but it looks like we’re going to be paying for the full night.
✓ This race is tighter than Pat Buchanan’s sphincter during Gay Pride Week.
– Adapted from Top5.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Which accent sounds the sexiest?

IT PAYS TO BE IGERNANT:
Contestant must answer rapid-fire and must get all questions WRONG to win …
• This is what pillows are commonly stuffed with. (Cannot say feathers, foam, fiber, etc.)
• This is the most common name for dogs. (Can’t answer Buddy, Max, Rover, etc.)
• Name the most popular breakfast food. (Cereal, bacon & eggs and the like are out of bounds.)
• This is the largest object currently orbiting Earth. (No Moon.)
• What’s the appropriate attire for a groom at a wedding? (Suit or tuxedo not allowed.)
• Who is the Republican candidate for US president? (Mitt Romney is verboten.)
• How many sides does a banana have? (A banana has 5 sides. Any other number is a winner.)
• Name any one of the ‘Seven Deadly Sins’. (Pride, covetousness, lust, gluttony, anger, envy and sloth are out. Anything else is fine.)
• What’s your favorite color? (Cannot name any color.)
• This is the most effective form of foreplay. (Uh, you decide.)

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was damned near impossible.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 73% of us keep THIS for ourselves, 17% throw it away, and 10% give it to the dog.
Answer: Leftover breakfast cereal milk.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Old age = you + 20 years.

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