October 29 2020

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Thursday, October 29, 2020 — Edition: #6839

The BS Press!

★ The antici . . . pation is almost over. Screen icon Tim Curry will return to one of his most famous films when he hosts a virtual screening of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” on Halloween. “The Rocky Horror Show Halloween Livestream” will benefit the Wisconsin Democratic Party and require a donation in order to virtually attend. It will air one-time only on Saturday at 10 p.m. ET. Curry will be joined by an all-star cast to read through the show, including Wilmer Valderrama, Lance Bass, Rosario Dawson, Jason George, Nell Campbell, Seth Green, Jason Alexander, David Arquette, and more. (Bring your own toast!)
★ Conan O’Brien has opened up about an incident on the makeshift set of his show. During Monday’s broadcast of “Conan”, he revealed that (quote): “someone broke into our little theater and took some of our equipment.” The culprit made off with several laptops used to conduct Zoom interviews and the show’s wooden clapperboard, a device used in the synchronizing of picture and audio. O’Brien’s reaction after he was informed of what was stolen? “That’s the lowest. I can’t think of anything lower. Okay, the laptops — fine. [But] you took the slate? That’s crazy.”
★ An autographed copy of a rare edition of Black Panther #1, signed by the late Chadwick Boseman and Stan Lee, is going up for auction today. Nate D. Sanders Auctions has listed the rare autographed comic book with an opening bid of $8,000. Interestingly, Boseman added the number “42” next to his signature, a clear nod to trailblazing baseball player Jackie Robinson, who wore the number. Boseman portrayed him in the 2013 film, “42”.
★ Jennifer Lopez and Armie Hammer will march down the aisle for an action comedy called “Shotgun Wedding.” Ryan Reynolds was originally reported to be starring in the film, but he’ll remain on as an executive producer. Lopez and Hammer will play a couple hosting a destination wedding while dealing with their lovable but opinionated families, only for the couple to get cold feet and for the entire wedding party to be taken hostage, forcing the couple to save their loved ones before they get at each other’s throats.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Chris Evans, Perfume Genius
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): America Ferrera, David Dobrik, Brothers Osbourne
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Julie Andrews, Amy Walter, Sam Smith
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Rosie O’Donnell, Shepard Smith, Sleaford Mods
• “Conan” (TBS):  Simon Pegg
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Matthew McConaughey, Natalie Portman
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Samuel L. Jackson
• “The Talk” (CBS): Kelly Osbourne, guest co-host Elaine Welteroth
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Sam Heughan, Meaghan Murphy
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Khloé Kardashian
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Montclair State University Choir, Natalie Portman, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Joey McIntyre
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Anne Hathaway, Dulce Sloan, Steve Gonsalves
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): Season 6 finale. Boxers face off against mixed martial artists; a team led by Sebastian Maniscalco competes against a team led by Jenifer Lewis.
• “Press Your Luck” (ABC): Season 2 finale
• “Superstore” (NBC): Season 6 premiere
• “Every Vote Counts: A Celebration of Democracy” (CBS): Artists, musicians, performers and community leaders come together for a bipartisan celebration of the precious value of the right to vote.

• Drake — is known as a man with a penchant for nice things. So, it surprised fans that during the opulent celebrations for his 34th birthday over the weekend, mac and cheese with, er, “sun dried tomato, raisins, capers and parsley” was one of the menu options. While many thought it was an error, one commenter wrote: “Why is Drake’s chef hiding raisins in all his food?”
• Iggy Azalea – has confirmed her split with rapper Playboi Carti and revealed her son Onyx’s face for the first time. On Instagram, she wrote: “You lost a real 1. People take loyalty for granted & that’s why I’d rather be alone.” The next day, she shared the first images of her baby boy.
• Celine Dion – will star in a new romantic drama, currently titled “Text For You”. The film tells the story of a woman who sends romantic texts to her late fiancé’s cell, but the number has been reassigned to a man suffering from similar heartbreak. Dion’s music and influence helps them to take a chance on love again. It will also star Sam Heughan and Priyanka Chopra Jonas.
• David Bowie – in honor of what would be his 74th birthday on Jan. 8, the all-star tribute concert “A Bowie Celebration: Just For One Day!” will take place. The livestream will feature Trent Reznor, Billy Corgan, Perry Ferrell, Gavin Rossdale, Joe Elliott, Ian Asbury and more. Tickets are now on sale.
• Genesis — have reunited in a London studio to begin rehearsals for their “The Last Domino? Tour”, set for April. They’ll be joined by Phil Collins’ son Nic on drums. The tour was originally scheduled for November, but was delayed due to the pandemic.
• Bob Dylan – Newly unearthed 1971 interviews with the late American blues artist Tony Glover contain some surprising insights. Among them: Dylan changed his name because he was worried about anti-Semitism; and he wrote ‘Lay Lady Lay’ for Barbra Streisand.
• Jason Aldean – A photo he posted of his family trip to Disney World didn’t get the reaction he was expecting. He shared a pic of he and his family smiling together, and made sure to point out that the group “Had mask on ALLLLLLL DAAAAAAAYY except when we took this pic.” Despite that, online trolls quickly started to complain about the lack of masks in the photo.
• Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani — are engaged! The couple made it ‘Instagram official’ on Tuesday when Stefani shared a photo of her ring alongside her new fiancé. Shelton posted the same picture, writing: “Hey [Gwen Stefani] thanks for saving my 2020… And the rest of my life… I love you. I heard a YES!” They’ve been together since meeting on “The Voice” in 2015.
• Jimmie Allen – will release his first children’s book “My Voice Is a Trumpet” next July. The book is aimed at teaching kids the power of speaking up. According to Allen, “writing a book and songwriting have a lot in common — it’s all about the honesty and connection with the audience.”
• Jameson Rodgers – His song ‘Some Girls’ is at #1 on this week’s Billboard Country Airplay chart — and has set a record. It took the longest of any debut single to reach the top, a total of 49 weeks. Jordan Davis’ ‘Singles You Up’, climbed to #1 in 2018 after 43 weeks.

A daily commute, whether by car, bus or subway, can be a big pain. But now, as many of us near 8 months of working from home, the novelty of rolling out of bed and going straight to work has worn off, and a growing number of people are embracing the so-called “fake commute”. That’s right. Some are arranging things so they can fit in a walk before work, some do some indoor exercise, some do a simple 15-minute meditation before kicking things into gear for the workday. Some do their fake commute AFTER work, before shifting into the role of parent or spouse for the evening. What’s the point? David Zweig, professor at the University of Toronto’s school of management, says a “fake commute” is a good way to psychologically separate or recover from the demands at work, not only allowing us to think about how we are going to approach our day (when the fake commute takes place before work), but also giving us time to “switch off and think about something other than work”. He says carving out that time – no matter how you decide to spend it – is good for recovery and important in stress management.
(It also allows you to get back to using the old “I got caught in traffic” excuse again – which we’ve all missed!)
(I thought this looked like a GREAT idea – until I realized it would require me to get dressed before noon…)
(And next week there’ll be study about how answering email while doing yoga is bad for your blood pressure…)

At least there’s ONE good thing about the colder weather coming. A new study has found that a really chilly day might help you burn more fat. Researchers from the Medical University of Vienna say cold temperatures help the body increase vitamin A levels in humans. That helps transform “bad” white fatty tissue into “good” brown tissue, which is better for fat burning. Researchers say when it’s cold, the body springs into action by stimulating the distribution of vitamins A towards adipose tissue. By triggering this response to cold weather, they witnessed the “browning” process turn adipose tissue into more easily burned off fat.
(That’s why I always lose so much weight every winter. Said no one ever…)
(The only way I ever lose weight in winter is by taking off my parka!)

By now it has become a cliché. Don’t get your hopes up if you’re headed to McDonald’s for a McFlurry—because the ice cream machine always seems to be broken. But now, a 24-year-old software engineer has taken the mystery out of a trip to the Golden Arches by launching “McBroken”, a website that tracks every broken McDonald’s ice-cream machine in the US. The site displays a map of every McDonald’s location in the US. Those with a working ice-cream machine get a green dot; locations without one, a red dot. A column on the right compiles statistics — at last check, 8.02% of McDonald’s ice-cream machines in the US were non-functional. Rashiq Zahid came up with the idea in July when he visited a McDonald, and tried to order a Sundae, but — you guessed it – the machine was broken. The site uses a bot, which attempts to place an order through the McDonald’s mobile app at every location every 30 minutes. If the chosen location doesn’t have a working machine, it won’t permit ordering of items containing ice cream. Zahid’s bot then uses that information to mark that location on the map. LINK:  https://mcbroken.com/
(Next can he do something about EVERY VENDING MACHINE THAT I’VE EVER TRIED TO USE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE??!!??!! Asking for a friend…)
(Awesome – I’ve finally found someone who orders more from McDonald’s than my Uncle Jerry!)
-TheVerge, CNN

⇒ Buy your toddler clothes with lots of snaps and buttons if you’ve ever thought it would be cool to do a puzzle that tries to kick you and run away while you solve it – Average Dad
⇒ I guess it’s time to get my Sunday going. These kids won’t yell at themselves. – Laura Marie
⇒ Me: get off that Xbox, it’s too violent. Son: what can we play instead?
Me: come sit down. this is hangman, an educational, family-friendly game where you get executed if you’re dumb – The Dad
⇒ Today our 4yo insisted on a large bowl of Golden Grahams, banana, and milk for breakfast, so long story short, my breakfast was 99% of a large bowl of Golden Grahams, bananas and milk – Dad on my Feet
⇒ They’re handling contact tracing all wrong. What they really need is to hire a team of relentless toddlers looking for their mothers when she’s just trying to shower or pee alone. – Rachel Sobel
⇒ Nearly lost my kids in the park today. Would have gotten away with it too if an old lady didn’t help them find me –Threetimedaddy
⇒ My dog took advantage of my exhaustion and forgetfulness by leading me to his food bowl twice in one morning and, let’s just say he’s pretty pleased with himself right now. – Alex Woodroe
⇒ Having a dog means you feel guilty going o-u-t to e-a-t. – Dan Regan

Working out with just one arm strengthens the other arm — even if you never move it once, according to researchers at Edith Cowan University. They say their study provides evidence that exercise for people who have suffered an injury is helpful in avoiding muscle loss while a limb is inactive. The Australian team studied those who had an arm immobilized, and found that exercising one arm can significantly improve the health of your other limb when compared with doing no exercises at all.


1947 [73] Richard Dreyfuss, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (“Jaws”, “Mr. Holland’s Opus”)

1957 [63] Dan Castellaneta, Chicago IL, TV voice-over actor (‘Homer’ on “The Simpsons” since 1989)

1961 [59] Randy Jackson, Gary IN, pop singer (Jackson 5-‘Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)’ [Not to be confused with the Randy Jackson of “American Idol” fame]

1971 [49] Winona Ryder, Winona MN, movie actress (“Beetlejuice”, “Edward Scissorhands”)/TV actress “Stranger Things” since 2016

1972 [48] Tracee Ellis Ross, LA CA, TV actress (‘Dr Rainbow Johnson’ in “black-ish” since 2014)/daughter of singer Diana Ross

1972 [48] Gabrielle Union, Omaha NE, movie actress (“Bring It On”, “Bad Boys II”)

1984 [36] Chris Baio, Bronxville NY, indie rock musician (Vampire Weekend-‘Diane Young’, ‘Cousins’)

• “Hermit Day”, the perfect excuse to curl up with a good book and enjoy a day of peace and quiet.

• “International Cat Day”, a day for cat fanatics to dote over their felines … as if they don’t the rest of the year…

• “Oatmeal Day”, a food celebration honoring the hot breakfast cereal that ‘sticks to your ribs’, as grandma used to say.

• “World Psoriasis Day”, to increase awareness of the life-long skin disorder. It’s estimated some 125 million people worldwide suffer from the malady.  NET: http://www.worldpsoriasisday.com

• World Stroke Day”, on this day, organizations around the world have facilitated events emphasizing education, testing, and initiatives to improve the damaging effects of stroke.

• “International Internet Day”, celebrated since 2005 to commemorate the momentous day in history, which to many, signifies the creation of the internet. On this date in 1969, the first successful electronic message was sent. The letters ‘L’ and ‘O’ were transferred from one computer to another before the connection crashed. (The dude was typing “LOL”????)

[Fri] Checklist Day
[Fri] Candy Corn Day
[Sat] Halloween
[Sat] National Magic Day
[Sun] Daylight Saving Time ends

2008 [12] “Quantum of Solace”, the 22nd James Bond film, starring Daniel Craig and Olga Kurylenko, premieres in London

1983 [37] Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of The Moon” breaks the record for most weeks on the Billboard albums chart, eclipsing “Johnny’s Greatest Hits” by Johnny Mathis with 491 weeks. It finally drops off the chart in 1988, but returns from time to time, notching over 950 weeks on the chart in total

1983 [37] ‘Islands in the Stream’, written by the Bee Gees and intended for Marvin Gaye, goes to #1 in the US as a duet by Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton

1945 [75] The first ballpoint pen goes on sale

1998 [22] Space Shuttle Discovery blasts off with 77-year old John Glenn on board, making him the oldest person to go to space

2008 [12] Delta Air Lines merges with Northwest, creating the world’s largest airline


✓ The human body contains 96,000km (59,650miles) of blood vessels.
✓ Kite flying is a professional sport in Thailand.
✓ Wakeboarding was originally called “skurfing”.
✓ The Chihuahua is the longest-lived breed of dog.
✓ Flies always launch backward for a quick getaway.
✓ Some farmers in the middle east breed bald chickens because they do better in the heat.

Best of BS:
• You get winded from knocking on the door.
• When someone drops a candy in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.
• You have to carefully choose a costume that won’t dislodge your hairpiece.
• You ask for high-fiber candy only.
• When the door opens you yell, “Trick or …” and can’t remember the rest.
• You’re the only ‘Batman’ in the neighborhood with a walker.
• You have to ask a kid to chew the candy for you.
• People say, “Great Keith Richards mask!”, but you’re not wearing a mask.
-First published in BS 2002

• Hairy Otter
• Dog the Mountie Hunter
• Actual Frozen Elsa
• Justin Beaver
• Poutina Turner
• Anyone from The Eh-Team
• The game ‘Sorry’
• Thankenstein
• Red Green, of course
• An American. You dress normally, but you carry a gun and pretend to not understand curling.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2017

➠ Comedian Jon Lovitz said he’s paying too much in taxes. (Personally, I disagree. That Jon Lovitz is a comedian, that is…)
➠ Saturday is Halloween. (The one night of the year where I buy bags upon bags of chocolate treats. . . turn off my porch light and act like I’m not home!)
➠ It’s Halloween this Saturday.  (A day when you can paint your face, dress in silly clothes and act like a fool, and nobody thinks you’re weird. Or, as Jimmy Fallon calls it . . . work.)
➠ ABC is rebooting “Bewitched” (Reportedly as part of a brilliant plan to capture the always-coveted “95 to dead-for-20-years” demo…)
➠ Having sex after a heart attack could boost your chances of survival, experts claim. (Like immediately after the heart attack? I’m not sure the others around the treadmill will be happy, but okay…)

Off to Never – Neverland:  https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSCdTUqA/

What is the tackiest Halloween costume you’ve ever seen?

• The word ‘witch’ comes from an Old English word meaning:
a) Wise woman [CORRECT]
b) Wicked woman
c) Wrinkled woman
d) Broom rider

• Which is an earlier name used for candy corn?
a) Sweet kernels
b) Chicken feed [CORRECT]
c) Sugar bombs
d) Orange drops

I want to be something really scary for Halloween this year so I’m dressing up as a phone battery at 2%.


Question:  40% of pet owners believe THIS about their dogs. What is it?
Answer:  They can see ghosts!

If the plan doesn’t work, change the plan — but never the goal.



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