Why Not Get Sheet-Faced Every Morning?
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Pixar has already confirmed a sequel to “Monsters Inc” (2001), but there are now rumors that it also intends to turn the clock back to produce a 4th “Toy Story” film as well as a sequel to the 2003 fish flick “Finding Nemo” (these aren’t aimed at kids, they’re for nostalgic 20-somethings) . . . Katy Perry’s ex, British actor/TV personality Russell Brand, has confirmed he’s dating Isabella Brewster, “Dallas” actress Jordana Brewster’s younger sister, a former talent agent (whoa, has he gone down-market!) . . . “American Horror Story” and “Mad Men” lead the newly-announced nominations for the “Primetime Emmy Awards” (ABC) coming up September 23rd, each earning 17 nods (gee, don’t see “Love In the Wild” listed here anywhere) . . . Lindsay Lohan appears alongside Shawn Holley, the lawyer who’s piloted her through a string of legal woes, for the new ‘Power Lawyers List’ in “Hollywood Reporter”, both sporting black dresses and towering heels (uh, Shawn’s a woman) . . . Actress-turned-animal rights activist Pamela Anderson has written an open letter calling for a ban on chuckwagon racing at the famous “Calgary Stampede” (since 1986, 54 horses have died or been euthanized at the annual rodeo) . . . Some observers suggest the stubbornly 2-dimensional “The Dark Knight Rises” may gross less in its opening weekend than “The Avengers” due to its lack of a 3-D ticket surcharge (dream on, we say new box office record) . . . And Kevin Frazier, host of TV pop culture magazine “The Insider”, has called his own program ‘a dinosaur’ while speaking on a panel at this week’s ‘Social TV Summit’ (in related news, if you have any openings at your media outlet, Kevin Frazier will be available – real soon).
WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Bachelorette” (ABC) – Sunday, in the season finalé, Emily makes her decision while joined by her family in Curacao.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated) – Today John Mayer (“Born & Raised”). Rerun.
• Firefly Music Festival (Dover DE) – This inaugural 3-day Delaware music fest is headlined by The Black Keys, The Killers, and Jack White, among over 40 acts performing on 4 stages.
• “Good Morning America” (ABC) – Today Dragonette (“Bodyparts”); Karmin (“Hello”).
• Jukebox Music Festival (Anderson CA) – The line-up for the 3-day debut of this country music fest at the Shasta Fairgrounds includes Alan Jackson, Asleep At the Wheel, Daryl Singletary, Joe Nichols, Kellie Pickler, and Mark Chesnutt among others.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight We Are Augustines (“Rise Ye Sunken Ships”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC) – Tonight A$AP Rocky (“Purple Swag”).
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated) – Today guest co-host Rob Thomas (Matchbox 20).
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC) – Host Will Ferrell (“Tim & Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie”); musical guest Usher (“Looking For Myself”). Rerun.
• “Teen Choice Awards” (FOX) – Sunday night it’s the 2012 edition of the annual fan-voted entertainment awards. Multiple nominees in music categories include Carly Rae Jepsen, Demi Lovato, Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, One Direction, and Usher. Performers include Flo Rida, and No Doubt debuting their new single “Settle Down”.
• “Today Show” (NBC) – This morning Hot Chelle Rae (“Whatever”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC) – Tonight Missy Higgins (“The Ol’ Razzle Dazzle”).
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• BoB – Sunday he plays a ‘MySpace Secret Show’ at NYC’s Highline Ballroom. Free tickets were given away on a first-come, first-served basis. (Don’t tell … it’s a secret.)
• Fergie – She and Pitbull have teamed up for the club banger “Feel Alive”, which will appear on the soundtrack of this Summer’s 3-D dance movie “Step Up Revolution” (opens July 27th). It’s the first headlining track Fergie has released since her 2006 solo album, “The Dutchess”.
• Florence & The Machine – Saturday the 2nd leg of their North American tour begins in Auburn, Washington with dates announced through August 2nd in Toronto. The Walkmen opens shows.
• The Fray / Kelly Clarkson – Saturday their co-headlining Summer tour kicks off in in Ridgefield, Washington. Carolina Liar opens all dates.
• KISS / Motley Crue – Tonight their 40-plus city “The Tour” kicks off in Bristow, Virginia. They’ll each play a 90-minute set at every concert. Motley Crue’s first-ever tour was with KISS in 1982.
• Zac Brown Band – “Uncaged” has debuted in “Billboard” as the week’s #1-selling album, but it likely benefitted from an Amazon.com sale on the MP3 version at just $3.99. It’s their 2nd chart-topper.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “The Dark Knight Rises” ( PG-13 Superhero Action Adventure ): Set 8 years after the events of the previous film (2008), director Christopher Nolan’s final chapter pits ‘Batman’ (Christian Bale) against ‘Bane’ (Tom Hardy) and ‘Catwoman’ (Anne Hathaway). Co-stars Michael Caine, Gary Oldman, Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Expect this to be the blockbuster of the year!
• Opening in limited release: “The Queen of Versailles”; “The Well Digger’s Daughter”.
For the first time in recent history, the average Canadian is richer than the average American. According to new data, the net worth of the average Canadian household is about $363,000, compared to the average American household’s $320,000. And Canada’s unemployment rate has fallen to 7.2% while America’s sits stagnant at 8.2%. The Canadian system seems to be working; the American system does not. And it’s not just Canadians who are noticing. As Iceland considers switching to a currency other than the krona, its leaders’ primary focus of interest is the loonie … the Canadian dollar. (Wow, soon Canadians can travel to a big rocky wasteland at par!)
WAYS “BREAKING BAD” COULD END:
The mega-popular series won’t be over-over for another 15 episodes (including this Sunday’s), but let’s do some speculation on possible finishes anyway …
• Walt Dies – There are a lot of different ways this could happen. Suicide, disease, or accident all seem viable, but if the show has to end with Walt’s death, let’s hope it’s a murder.
• Jesse Dies – Jesse’s death would feel like more of a tragedy. He’s certainly not innocent, but a lot of what’s wrong with his life is Walt’s doing, not his own.
• Walt & Family Start a New, Crime-Free Life – Picture a dejected Walt becoming a high school chemistry teacher again with a new name and a new home but the same old ennui.
• Walt Lives, But Everyone Close to Him Dies – And now he just has to sit on his ash heap in agony for the rest of his life and feel bad about what he’s done.
• Walt Dies, and Skyler Takes Over As Drug Queenpin – She’s good with numbers and she can lie to the feds; how hard can the rest of it be?
• Everybody Lives and Stays Put in Albuquerque – Retiring ‘Heisenberg’ and going back to milquetoast ‘Walter White’, car-wash owner, would be the ultimate gut-punch for the series.
– Adapted from Vulture.com
BS AMAZING ANIMAL FACTS:
• Greenland sharks swim at less than 1 mph.
– “Magazine Monitor”
• The world’s smallest mammal is the bumblebee bat of Thailand, weighing less than a penny.
• Baby songbirds build playlists.
– eScience News
BS CHRONOMETER 07.20.12
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1947  Carlos Santana, Autlan de Navarro, Mexico, guitarist/pop-rock musician (“Game of Love”, “Smooth”)/tied Michael Jackson’s record for most “Grammy Awards” in a single year by winning 8 in 2000
1964  Chris Cornell, Seattle WA, rock singer (Soundgarden-“Black Hole Sun”, ex-Audioslave-“Be Yourself”)
1966  Stone Gossard, Seattle WA, rock guitarist (Pearl Jam-“The Fixer”, “World Wide Suicide”)
1971  Sandra Oh, Nepean ON Canada, TV actress (‘Dr Cristina Yang’ on “Grey’s Anatomy” since 2005)/movie actress (“Under the Tuscan Sun”, “Sideways”)
1973  Omar Epps, Brooklyn NY, TV actor (‘Dr Eric Foreman’ on “House MD” 2004-12)
1980  Gisele Bundchen, Horizontina, Brazil, highest-paid model in the world since 2004/wed to NFL quarterback Tom Brady (New England Patriots) since 2009
1980  Mike Kennerty, Stillwater OK, rock guitarist (All-American Rejects-“Gives You Hell”, “Dirty Little Secret”)
1988  Julianne Hough, Sandy UT, movie actress (“Rock of Ages”, “Footloose”)/country singer (“That Song In My Head”)/dancer (2-time “Dancing With the Stars” winner)/Ryan Seacrest’s supposed girlfriend
Movie director Norman Jewison (“Moonstruck”) is 86; Cartoonist Garry Trudeau (“Doonesbury”) is 64; Comedian-actor Robin Williams (“Good Will Hunting”) is 61; Comedian-actor Jon Lovitz (“Hot in Cleveland”) is 55; Country singer Paul Brandt (“I Do”) is 40; Movie actor Josh Hartnett (“Sin City”) is 34; Rock keyboardist Johan Carlsson (Carolina Liar) is 28.
TV personality Alex Trebek (“Jeopardy!”) is 72; Movie actor Danny Glover (“Lethal Weapon”) is 66; Classic rock singer Don Henley (Eagles) is 65; Movie actor-comedian Albert Brooks (“Finding Nemo”) is 65; Movie actor Willem Dafoe (“Spider-Man”) is 57; TV actor-comedian David Spade (“Rules of Engagement”) is 48; Pop singer-actress Selena Gomez (“Who Says”) is 20.
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Cleat Dancing Day”, a day to see how much fun it is – if any – to tap dance while wearing baseball cleats.
• “Hemingway Days”, the 32nd annual festival saluting the noted author in Key West, Florida through Sunday. One highlight is the ‘Hemingway Look-Alike Contest’ which draws greybeards from all over.
• “International Chess Day”, an annual observation since 1966 honoring the game that generates challenge, intellectual stimulation, and enjoyment for people of all ages.
• “Lollipop Day”, celebrating the 1908 invention of the famous candy on a stick. Pieces of hard candy were put on the ends of pencils for kids to nibble much earlier than that, but the treat had no name. So here’s to lollipops! When it comes to yum, you can’t lick ‘em … ‘er actually you can.
• “Moon Day”, the anniversary of the first lunar landing in 1969. Apollo 11 astronaut Neil Armstrong became the first to walk on the Moon as nearly 700 million TV viewers tuned in. Edwin ‘Buzz’ Aldrin joined him later, while Michael Collinsremained orbiting above. A few things you likely didn’t know about the lunar landing …
• “Ramadan” begins at sundown, the fasting month for Muslims worldwide. An appropriate greeting is ‘Ramadan mubarek’ (blessed be the month of Ramadan).
• “Special Olympics Day”, a day of awareness of disabled athletes and disability games celebrated on the anniversary of the first ‘Special Olympics’, held in Chicago in 1968.
• “Ugly Truck Day”. Sure a brand new, shiny truck with all the gadgets working is a great thing, but an old ugly truck is something to cherish with pride! Or maybe that’s just a guy thing?
• “Junk Food Day”. If your health wasn’t a factor, which junk food would you chow down on every chance you got: Burgers, Pizza, Hot Dogs, Tacos, Fries, Chocolate?
• “Woodie Wagon Day”, observed annually on the 3rd Saturday of July to salute the vintage car body style (especially a station wagon) where the rear bodywork is constructed of wood framework with in-fill panels of wood or painted metal.
• “World Snail Racing Championships” in Norfolk, England. The racing track is marked with 2 concentric circles. Snails are placed along the inner circle and the winner is the first to reach the outer circle. The distance is 13 inches (33 cm) … if a snail travels in a straight line.
• “Baseball Hall of Fame Induction” in Cooperstown NY. 2012 inductees are Barry Larkin and Ron Santo.
• “Hammock Day”, honoring the most relaxing thing you can swing between 2 trees. It’s the perfect excuse to slow down and loaf during the ‘Dog Days of Summer’.
• “Health, Happiness With Hypnosis Day”, celebrating the therapeutic value of hypnosis as a tool in promoting well-being. (“You are getting sleepy …. very sleepy …”)
• “Rat-Catchers Day”, observed on the anniversary of the fabled ‘Pied Piper of Hamelin’ (Germany) piping the town’s rats into the Weser River back in 1376.
• “Spooner’s Day”, honoring the 1844 birth of William Archibald Spooner in London UK, who accidentally invented ‘spoonerisms’ – slips of the tongue like ‘queer old dean’ instead of ‘dear old queen’ or ‘blushing crow’ for ‘crushing blow’.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2007  Bigscreen version of the hit Broadway musical “Hairspray” opens in movie theaters
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1975  Steven Van Zandt makes his first appearance in concert with Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2005  Canada becomes the 4th country in the world to legalize same-sex marriage (after the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain)
COMING UP . . .
[Mon] Gorgeous Grandma Day
[Mon] Mosquito Day
[Mon] Hot Enough For Ya Day
[Mon] Hot Dog Day
[Mon] Vanilla Ice Cream Day
[Tues] Cousins Day
[Tues] Drive-Thru Day
[Tues] Tequila Day
[Tues] Tell an Old Joke Day
This Week Is … Lumberjack Week
This Month Is … Horseradish Month
BATMAN’S PET PEEVES:
• When you can see outline of his underwear through the ‘Bat Suit’.
• After a dramatic entrance at the scene of crime, having to convince everybody he’s not a professional wrestler.
• Punks who gather around and smart off while he’s getting gas for the ‘Batmobile’.
• Nuclear power source for his utility belt has rendered him sterile.
• Really stupid people who shout out, “Hey! Where’s Tonto?”
• When the dry cleaner accidentally switches the Batman cowl with the Deadmau5 head.
• When people call him ‘The Batman’. It’s just ‘Batman’, dammit!
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I don’t care if I’m apathetic.
BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Which country has the worst lovers?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: A survey shows that THIS is the person adults lie to the most.
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.