WEEKEND TABLOID & BLOG BS:
• Today Christopher Chaney, the 35-year-old Florida man accused of hacking into the email accounts of Scarlett Johansson, Mila Kunis, and other Hollywood stars, is expected to plead guilty in court to 9 felony counts, including charges of computer hacking and illegal wire-tapping. Although Chaney apologized to his alleged victims in an interview shortly after his indictment in October, he still faces up to 60 years behind bars.
– “Washington Post”
• A rep for Ray J, the singer and ‘close friend’ of the late Whitney Houston, has denied claims he knew she was doing cocaine again at the time of her death. LA County coroners have found she died of accidental drowning due to the effects of cocaine and heart disease, and toxicology tests also turned up marijuana, anti-anxiety medication, a muscle relaxant, and an anti-histamine. Whitney’s former sister-in-law Leolah Brown claims Ray J not only knew about the drug usage, he was her supplier.
• The producers of the new TV musical drama series “Smash” were honored with the top award at the “GLAAD Media Awards” in NYC on Saturday night, hosted by “Glee” actors Cory Montieth & Naya Rivera. As well as the TV show, Neil Meron & Craig Zadan have previously produced the movie musicals “Chicago” and “Hairspray”. In related news, “Smash” has just been renewed by NBC-TV for a 2nd season.
• “The Hunger Games” is expected to bring a major tourism boost to North Carolina, where the blockbuster movie was shot. It’s expected the state’s tourism industry will attempt to capitalize on the phenomenon by developing hotel packages, zip-line tours, and survival training. But not everyone appreciates the attention. Residents near Henry River Mill Village, which was used as the setting for ‘District 12’, are already complaining about too many visitors 24/7. The village’s mill burned down back in 1977, giving the area the atmosphere of a ghost town … until now.
• 31-year-old famous person Kim Kardashian is threatening to press legal charges against the attacker who hit her with a flour bomb Thursday night during the launch of her new perfume in Hollywood. Reports suggest the unnamed female assailant attacked the starlet because she wears fur. Even though Kardashian shrugged off the attack at the time, she’s now labeled the incident ‘bullying’, and ‘not acceptable’, and says she’s going to ‘definitely deal with it’.
• And 24-year-old actress Hilary Duff jokes that she will definitely NOT be allowing wildman actor Charlie Sheen, her co-star in the upcoming comedy movie “She Wants Me”, to ever babysit her new son. Duff and her retired NHL hockey player-hubby Mike Comrie, welcomed ‘Luca Cruz Comrie’ last Tuesday night.
– “OK! Magazine”
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC) – The couples perform the jive or the quickstep.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC) – Shinedown (“Amaryllis”, out tomorrow).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Wallpaper (“Doodoo Face”).
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Black Dub (“Black Dub”) Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC) – Swervedriver (“99th Dream”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Train (“California 37”, out April 17th).
• “Today” (NBC) – Lauren Alaina performs “Georgia Peaches”.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC) – Jake Owen (“Barefoot Blue Jean Night”).
• “The Voice” (NBC) – Team members perform dueling duets; the coaches decide who will advance.
TODAY’S TV SEASON FINALÉ:
• “Alcatraz” (FOX) – Wraps up its rookie season with a 2-hour instalment.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Carrie Underwood – The new video “Good Girl” played on a 4-story-high billboard in NYC’s Times Square every hour throughout the day and night on Friday. The song is the lead single from her upcoming album “Blown Away”, out May 1st.
• Justin Bieber – His new single, “Boyfriend”, is scheduled for release today.
• Kix Brooks – He was unable to perform a Friday night concert in Jacksonville, Florida due to a burst vocal cord (ouch!). Former partner Ronnie Dunn, who happened to be vacationing in the area, volunteered to fill in.
• Madonna – Her much-hyped 12th studio album, “MDNA”, is out today. The title is a sort of text-message spelling of her name, but some have criticized it as being too close to ‘MDMA’, the abbreviated name for the narcotic also known as Ecstasy.
• Rihanna – According to a source quoted in Britain’s “The Sun”, she’s been secretly dating actor Ashton Kutcher for months, ever since they exchanged phone numbers at a party in December. She’s reportedly told friends that ‘he’s funny and cute’.
• Sleigh Bells – Tonight the duo kicks off a North American tour in support of “Reign of Terror” in Toronto, Canada. They also begin their gig as opening act on the Red Hot Chili Peppers tour in Toronto, on April 27th.
• Taylor Swift – Her new tune “Ours” is atop this week’s “Billboard” magazine ‘Country Songs’ chart.
• Usher – He’s in training to play former boxer Sugar Ray Leonard in an upcoming bio-pic called “Hands of Stone”. The movie focuses on the life of Panamanian boxer Roberto Duran, who will be played by Gael Garcia Bernal.
THE LASER UNPRINTER:
Remember the so-called ‘paperless office’? It’s an idea that’s been around since the mid-‘70s but most offices still use as much paper as ever, despite the rise of digital technology. A new invention may be able to help with that. Created at Britain’s University of Cambridge, the ‘unprinter’ vaporizes the toner from traditional printers without damaging the paper underneath, so the ink is erased and the paper can be reused. The team behind the printer estimates that the technology could cut carbon emissions in half while making the recycling process 20 times more efficient. (Hopefully it presses the discard with a steam iron as well.)
HAVE A NICE COMMUTE:
A poll of 2,000 young drivers reveals the dangerous things some people do behind-the-wheel …
✗ 70% have used a cellphone while driving
✗ 50% have sent text messages.
✗ 40% have eaten a burger.
✗ 25% have smoked a joint.
✗ 20% have had sex.
(Fortunately, nobody admitted doing all of these at once.)
– “Max Power”
WHITER CLOUDS, COOLER ARCTIC:
According to scientists, warming in the Arctic is causing sea ice to melt at an alarming rate, which could lead to a dangerous release of methane. Edinburgh University engineer Stephen Salter is suggesting a technical fix for the problem … ‘cloud-whitening towers’. He thinks that pumping seawater spray into the atmosphere from high towers would help cool the planet by making clouds more opaque, thus reflecting more of the Sun’s light back into space. It’s estimated the cost of the towers would be about $300,000 apiece. (About the same as a beachfront condo on the Beaufort Sea if something isn’t done soon.)
– BBC News
THINGS KIDS TODAY NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT:
• Texting Full Words – That’s for moms. Kids these days wouldn’t dare text something as complicated as ‘love you’ when it can be simply abbreviated as ‘LY’.
• Missing Favorite TV Shows – With options like DVR and Hulu, watching TV live is quickly becoming a thing of the past.
• Paying for Music – In a decade where CDs have become obsolete and sites like Megaupload shut down, kids are now increasingly heading to free streaming sites like Spotify.
• Required Reading – There’s an app for that. Audio Study Guides now allow kids to virtually skip reading entirely.
• Cursive Writing – Kids today don’t bother writing letters when they can simply post on a wall, text, or email.
• Spelling – With spell check options available on basically every platform, knowing how to spell complex words off the top of your head is becoming less and less common.
• Carrying a Camera – Smartphones now come equipped with super mega-pixel cameras and awesome apps like Instagram and Dotti. There’s simply no need to tote around a 2nd device.
UNLIMITED OIL SOURCE?
A US-based start-up company says it has developed a way of turning plastic into oil. The technology could simultaneously provide a domestic source of fuel and keep many plastics out of landfills. The ‘Plastic2Oil’ system melts plastic waste, creating a liquid stream, which is then vaporized and converted into a fuel that can be used in diesel engines, ship engines, and power plants. ‘Plastic2Oil’ is currently working with several companies that produce large volumes of plastic waste to develop the system. (If this works, there’s a Texas-sized island of plastic floating in the Pacific that could last us for years!)
BS AMAZING VANITY PLATE FACTS:
• In 2008, 25-year-old Saeed Abdel Ghaffar Khouri of Abu Dhabi paid the equivalent of $14 million to have a personalized license plate reading ‘1’.
• It’s estimated there are 9.3 million personalized license plates on America’s roadways.
• A ‘blue list’ of banned words, phrases, and/or letter-number combinations considered obscene or in poor taste is kept by most issuing authorities.
– Adapted from TheToiletPaper.com
AND WE QUOTE:
“I’ve got different plants in my garden that are going on, and that’s a really big tree that would take a lot of nurturing and energy. It’s just not the right time right now.”
– Fergie (Black Eyed Peas) telling MTV News why she won’t be joining “The X Factor” (FOX) as a judge at this time.
BS CHRONOMETER 03.26.12
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1948  Steve Tyler (Tallarico), Yonkers NY, TV personality (“American Idol”)/rock singer (Aerosmith-“I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing”, “Dream On”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2001)
1968  Kenny Chesney, Knoxville TN, country singer (“Reality”, “When the Sun Goes Down”)/21 #1 singles/7 CMA Awards/briefly married to movie actress Renée Zellweger (2005)
1973  Larry Page, Lansing MI, co-founder and CEO of Google BS FACTOID: As of 2012, his personal wealth is estimated to be $18.7 billion.
1985  Keira Knightley, London UK, movie actress (“Atonement”, “Pirates Of the Caribbean” movies) UP NEXT: Plays the lead role in “Anna Karenina”, opening November 9th.
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Legal Assistants Day”, honoring all those who help lawyers with their briefs.
• “Make Up Your Own Holiday Day”. What ingredients make for a good holiday? Special foods? Parades? Costumes? Fireworks? Religious obligations? A day off from the sweatbox?
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2007  Broward County FL Medical Examiner’s Office reveals reality TV starlet Anna Nicole Smith died of an accidental overdose of at least 9 prescription medications
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1990  “Under the Sea” from the Disney movie “The Little Mermaid” is named ‘Best Song’ at the 62nd Academy Awards
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
2000  Vladimir Putin 1st elected president of Russia
2008  Ford Motor Co sells its Jaguar and Land Rover divisions to India’s Tata Group
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1996  Orlando Magic’s NBA-record 40-game ‘home win streak’ finally ends vs LA Lakers
COMING UP . . .
[Tues] Celebrate Exchange Day
[Tues] Quirky Country Music Song Titles Day
[Tues] Viagra Day
[Wed] Weed Appreciation Day
[Thurs] Knights of Columbus Day
[Thurs] Mom & Pop Business Owners Day
THIS WEEK IS . . .
Cleaning Week / Pediatric Nurse Practitioner Week / Protocol Officers Week / Root Canal Awareness Week
BEST OF BS:
A highlight bit culled from 18 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
YOUR PERSONALITY ACCORDING TO YOUR FRIDGE MAGNETS:
• Bird or butterfly magnets mean you’re generous and freedom-loving.
• Teddy bear and other animal magnets suggest that you like hugging.
• Fried egg magnets say you’re intellectual, with a good sense of humor.
• Marilyn Monroe, Elvis, or Mickey Mouse magnets say that you’re stuck in the past.
• Computer-themed magnets mean that you think you are trendy.
• Free fridge magnets from advertisers show that you’re tight-fisted and thrifty.
(Ask listeners what’s stuck on their fridge, then do a ‘personality reading’ … that you make up.)
– First published in “BS” 2004.
BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Which of your all-time favorite TV shows was axed too soon? (How about “Arrested Development”, “Freaks & Geeks”, “My So Called Life”, “This Is Wonderland”?)
BS RANDOM JOKE:
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
Hospital emergency rooms treat 40,000 children annually for injuries suffered on which?
a. Playground Slides.
b. Trampolines. [CORRECT]
BS WEB GOODIE:
Want to fight zombies in an abandoned shopping mall? Now you can! Details here …
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: About a quarter of us will do THIS before noon today.
Answer: Toast something (bread, Pop Tart, bagel, etc).
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Dangerous exercise … jumping to conclusions.
NOW ON OUR SHEET LIST:
Ted Soady-Easton @ 94.5 The Bull [CIBU] Wingham ON Canada; Ed @ HFM Market Harborough UK; Cole Woods @ The Panther [Canadore College] North Bay ON Canada; Andrew Summers @ Dhoom FM 89.3 [WDDM] Hazlet NJ; Selena J @ Majic 104.9 [KMJM] St. Louis MO; Andi Lewin @ Boom Radio, Perth WA, Australia; and Niki Vee @ KOOL 103.5 [KLDZ] Medford OR.