Thursday, September 5, 2024 — Edition: #7786

Get Sheet-Faced Every Morning!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The full cast of “Dancing With the Stars” Season 32 was announced on “Good Morning America” yesterday. A few ABC favorites from “The Bachelor” franchises will be joining the 33rd season, along with other athletes, Hollywood stars and reality stars. The full list: Super Bowl champ Danny Amendola, “The Bachelor’s” Joey Graziadei, NBA champ Dwight Howard, Chandler Kinney from “Pretty Little Liars: Original Sin”, Olympian Ilona Maher , model Brooks, Phaedra Parks from “The Real Housewives of Atlanta”, plus Eric Roberts, Tori Spelling, Reginald VelJohnson from “Family Matters”, and “Bachelorette” Jenn Tran. Two other contestants — Anna Delvey and Olympic “pommel horse guy” Stephen Nedoroscik — had already been revealed as part of this year’s cast.
-TheWrap, Deadline
★ Demi Moore isn’t very pumped about a possible remake of her 1990 movie “Ghost”. Over the years, there have been talks about re-creating the iconic romance, most recently with Channing Tatum, who announced his plans to re-do the film last year. Moore, who starred in the original alongside Patrick Swayze, said to Variety: “There are some films better left alone, but it depends on what the take is. Moore feels the success of Ghost is thanks to the movie’s “alchemy”, and gave props to other cast-members including Whoopi Goldberg and Tony Goldwyn, who played the villain. But, Moore said, “Channing is incredibly intelligent and talented — who knows what he would bring to it if it happened.”
-NYPost
★ Ellen DeGeneres is returning to Netflix with what she’s calling her last stand-up special ever. “For Your Approval,” will premiere on the streamer on Sept. 24. In a statement, DeGeneres said: “To answer the questions everyone is asking me — Yes, I’m going to talk about it. Yes, this is my last special. Yes, Portia really is that pretty in real life.” It’ll be DeGeneres’ second Netflix special, following “Relatable” in 2018. She promises to reveal what she’s been up to since she was “kicked out of show business” – including segments about raising chickens, parallel parking, and the joys and horrors of becoming a household name.
-TheWrap
★ David E. Kelley, writer-producer behind iconic shows such as “Ally McBeal”, “L.A. Law” and “Big Little Lies”, will receive the 2024 International Emmy Founders Award. Kelley is also the creator of the Emmy, Peabody, and Golden Globe Award-winning shows “Boston Legal”, “The Practice”, and “Ally McBeal”, and the dramatic series “Big Little Lies”, “Boston Public”, “Chicago Hope”, and “Picket Fences”. He’ll be honored at the November 25 awards gala in New York City.
-Deadline
★ You might be used to seeing Colin Jost and Michael Che on Saturday nights, but this month, you’ll be able to catch them live on a Thursday. Peacock will air its first-ever live comedy special on Sept. 12, hosted by the “Weekend Update” duo. “Colin Jost & Michael Che Present: New York After Dark” will stream live with an audience from The Bell House in Brooklyn, and will include appearances by other, yet-unnamed comics. It promises to feature both up-and-coming and established comedians, and will see Grammy-nominees 1500 or Nothin’ as the house band.
-TheWrap

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” (ABC/Global): Brian Tyree Henry, Muni Long
• “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Kevin Hart, Paris Hilton, Miranda Lambert
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Stephen Curry, Sen. Mark Kelly (D-Ariz.)
• “After Midnight” (CBS/Global): Jordan Temple, Will Miles, Greta Titelman
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): TBA
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Katie Ledecky
• “The Talk” (CBS): Thomas Lennon, Teresa Giudice; Camilla Luddington guest co-hosts
• “Live With Kelly and Mark” (ABC/CTV): Carrie Coon, Daniel Dae Kim, Tamron Hall, Lish Steiling
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Amy Poehler, Gottmik, Nina West and Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, SHAED
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Sudtin Butler, Callum Turner
• “The Jennifer Hudson Show” (Check local listings): Common, Tiffany Miranda
• “NFL Football”: (NBC, TSN): The 2024 season kicks off with 2-time defending Super Bowl champs, the Kansas City Chiefs hosting the Baltimore Ravens.
• “Big Brother” (CBS): A houseguest is evicted and interviewed; remaining houseguests compete for power in the next head of household.
• “Lucky 13” (ABC): A horse trainer and a student from California play for the $1 million jackpot.
• “The Real Housewives of Orange County” (Bravo): The ladies head to wine country for Heather’s fundraising event: Jenn has a court date to determine her financial future.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Katy Perry — Listening parties for her new album “143” will be held in record stores across the US on Sept. 18. Fans can nab invites by preordering a copy of 143 on clear blue vinyl. The album comes out Sept. 20. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/bdcmyweb
• Lady Gaga – showed up to the Venice Film Festival once again rocking her signature blonde hair, 3 weeks after dying it black. What’s more, she flashed her megawatt engagement ring as she and fiancé Michael Polansky arrived. The 13-time Grammy winner is there to promote “Joker: Folie à Deux”.
• Linkin Park – Expect some kind of announcement today – we think. After launching a mysterious countdown clock ticking down to last Wednesday, it reached 0:00 … before starting to count UP, like a stopwatch. Thursday, the message “Be part of something. September 5.” was shared by the band’s social media pages — with a partial image of an ‘LP’ logo. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/332zn8j9
• Rolling Stones – Ronnie Wood is selling prints of his portrait of Freddie Mercury to raise funds for a trust set up in the late singer’s name. The Stones’ guitarist, who is also a noted artist, has released £799 (US$1,046) editions of his painting named “The Mercury”, depicting the late singer in an iconic pose in the yellow jacket worn at Queen’s legendary Live Aid performance.  LINK: https://tinyurl.com/yravwwh9
• Van Valen – Alex Van Halen has shared a snippet of the previously unreleased song he created with his late brother Eddie. Titled ‘Unfinished’, it is the last piece of music the 2 wrote together, and can be heard as Alex narrates the audio version of his new memoir “Brothers”, out Oct. 22. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4yuj2ums
• Keith Urban — brought his next album’s title “High” to a whole new level. During a visit to his native Australia, he climbed to the peak of Sydney Harbour Bridge after his pop-up show in the city. He captioned a collection of pics of him on the bridge, as well as his Sydney concert, with the words: “We’re getting HIGH in Sydney…a massive thank you to everyone at @theoxfordartfactory last night! SO GOOD.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/2p9kd6cw
• Scotty McCreery – will pay tribute to his home state by releasing an “NC State Version” of his new single ‘Fall of Summer’ tomorrow. The Garner NC native said in a video posted on X: “So I’ve seen y’all’s videos shouting out your colleges and I know I’ve been singing NC State live, so I guess it’s time to release the official version.” LINK: https://tinyurl.com/ycxc7523
• Chris Young – revealed in an interview his recent “splurge”. The avid Texas Rangers fan showed off a shiny Rangers World Series ring. When pressed for details about how he was able to score it, all he would say is: “I got really cool friends…but there’s a couple buddies of mine — one that works in the Cowboys organization and one that works with the Rangers.”

SHOOTING THE BULL

“CHILL” HOBBY:
Because why not? That’s the only explanation I have for this: “fridgescaping”, or decorating the inside of a fridge, is a new trend that is both delighting and enraging TikTok viewers lately. The concept of styling the interior of a kitchen appliance in a similar way to how one would decorate any room of their house actually goes as far back as a 2011 blog post. Some include thoughtfully arranged produce, like a bouquet of asparagus in a vase, and charming storage containers, like pink glass pitchers and antique ceramic butter dishes. Others opt for theming their “fridgescapes” around shows like “Bridgerton” by losing the condiments and cartons of whatever, and adding fridge-safe decorations such as pictures and figurines (“Fridgerton”?). Critics of the idea point out the inconvenience and lack of practicality involved in “interior decorating” a spot that is seldom seen by others, and is usually hidden even to those who live there. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mr2rfvbh
(My parents were way ahead of the curve on this. They always put the pictures I drew inside the fridge – because they were too embarrassed to hang them on the outside!)
(I’m thinking that “fridgescaping” is a sure sign that you have too much money – or not enough groceries!)
-CNN

EXERCISES IN ABNORMALITY:
► If you’d like to enjoy better sleep, try doing a few sets of squats in the evening. A study by University of Otago in New Zealand found a link between short bursts of nightly strength training and about half an hour of extra sleep. The researchers chose squats because the exercise recruits the largest muscles – and test subjects didn’t need equipment or substantial space. (They obviously haven’t seen me try to do squats!)
► It’s the current viral workout – and you can’t “beat” it. “Cardio drumming” is where you place an exercise ball in a bucket and whack it with drumsticks to the beat of a song, as a way of burning calories, relieving stress, and strengthening bones. A recent TikTok clip showing a group of women cardio drumming to ‘7 Rings’ by Ariana Grande smashed 19.3 million views and garnered nearly 30,000 comments. One doctor pointed out that this type of class “isn’t just about fitness… they have created an incredible community” and it will “lead to better self-esteem, more motivation and probably impact multiple other areas in their life.” (And let’s face it: Sometimes we all have the urge to round up our exercise equipment and hit it with a stick – or 2!) LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4tnw6eek
-Health, NYPost

NO BAD APPLES:
According to a report, Apple doesn’t allow bad guys to be seen using their products, such as iPhones and iPads, in TV, film or ads. While the policy is not explicitly written in Apple’s Guidelines for Using Apple Trademarks and Copyrights, the document states that “the Apple product is shown only in the best light, in a manner or context that reflects favorably on the Apple products”. The guidelines also state, “You may not use an Apple trademark or any other Apple-owned graphic symbol, logo, or icon in a disparaging manner.” In 2020, “Knives Out” director Rian Johnson was the first big name to speak publicly about Apple’s alleged rules. In the film, every character has an iPhone except for Ana de Armas’ character ‘Marta’ (who acts guilty), and Chris Evans’ character ‘Ransom’ (who is guilty). Another example is HBO’s “Succession”. While most of the characters use iPhones, viewers never see antagonists ‘Logan Roy’, ‘Gerri Kellman’ or ‘Tom Wambsgans’ with an Apple product. Apple has never confirmed nor denied the existence of the so-called “no villain clause.”
(Now you know: “When a stranger calls” …you’d better hope he’s using an iPhone!)
(…of course, we all know that the REAL villains are the service providers!)
-People

THE WEIRDEST PUMPKIN SPICE FLAVORS OUT THERE:
➢ Busch Pumpkin Spice Dog Brew: It’s an alcohol-free drink for dogs made with pumpkin, cinnamon, ginger, turmeric, and water. Sold in 4-packs for $15. (I knew people sometimes start to look like their pets – Now, we’re apparently drinking like them too!)
➢ Krispy Kreme Pup’kin Spice Doggie Doughnuts: These baked donut-shaped dog biscuits contain pumpkin, peanut butter, and carob, and flavors include Pup’kin Spice Original Glazed, Pup’kin Spice Cake, Pup’kin Spice Maple Peanut, and Pup’kin Spice Cheesecake Swirl.
➢ Hefty Cinnamon Pumpkin Spice Ultra Strong Trash Bags: Forget about scented candles. What you need is trash that doesn’t smell like trash. These things are available at major retailers for $5.99. (Why not? My wife goes to Starbucks so often, our recycle bin ALREADY smells like pumpkin spice!)
➢ Pumpkin Spice Avocado Oil Caviar: Chosen Foods came up with this one. It is made from their avocado oil and a blend of cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and allspice—no fish eggs included. Just $19.99. (Wow – 3 things that I try to avoid – all together!)
➢ Pumpkin Spice Latte Body Wash: Part of Tree Hut’s Café Collection, it contains notes of pumpkin, orange zest, cinnamon, and nutmeg. (For the type of person who loves pumpkin spice so much that they want to coat their entire body in it!)
➢ Pumpkin Spice Latte Engagement Ring: Jewelry company Angelic Diamonds offers “The perfect ring for when it’s love at first sip”. This $12,500 custom ring features a rose gold band that holds white diamonds and orange sapphires in a conical shape, mimicking the foam atop a PSL. It comes in a box with a pumpkin-shaped clasp and a cardboard wrap, like the sleeve on a hot cup of coffee.
➢ DUMPkin Spice Wipes from DUDEwipes: These wipes are exactly what you think they are: rear-end wipes “made with clove, nutmeg and other fall (“crap”), says its maker. And yes, the idea DID come from an April Fool’s Day joke. (For those who believe the smell of pumpkin spice should be retained from the time it enters – to when it exits the body!)
-TheTakeout, first published in BS in 2023

COUNTRY ARTISTS’ LAST JOBS BEFORE HITTING IT BIG:
Garth Brooks — was a bouncer at a bar.
Thomas Rhett — laid hardwood floors.
Jordan Davis — was a bartender in Nashville.
Kane Brown — was a FedEx delivery driver.
Jason Aldean — was a Pepsi delivery driver.
Kelly Clarkson (who has dabbled in country music) – worked at Papa John’s Pizza.
Carrie Underwood — was a gas station attendant.
Dierks Bentley – cleaned dirty houseboat bathroom reservoir tanks (OK, that’s gotta be the crappiest job of all!)
-TasteofCountry

DID YOU KNOW?
If summer felt more humid than usual, blame corn. New data shows that heat waves can feel even hotter thanks to evapotranspiration, or “corn sweat.” And it will likely only get worse with climate change. What is evapotranspiration? To beat the heat, corn and other crops pull moisture from the soil — then let go of whatever they don’t need as vapor into the air. All plants do this, but where there is a lot of the same plant in an area that is being hit with extreme heat, that vapor can “supercharge” humidity. After all, one acre of corn expels up to 4,000 gallons of water each day. Experts say the combination of extreme heat caused by climate change and the growing demand for corn is to blame for making summers stickier. (Also to blame: that cheap deodorant I bought at the dollar store!)
-MorningBrew

BS CHRONOMETER 09.05.24 

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Toronto International Film Festival”. TIFF starts today and runs until September 15. It’s one of the largest film festivals in the world, attracting over 480,000 people annually. Angelina Jolie, Pharrell Williams and Cate Blanchett are among the celebs expected to walk the red carpet, while some of the buzziest titles include Pamela Anderson’s comeback drama “The Last Showgirl,” Jason Reitman’s “Saturday Night,” and Francis Ford Coppola’s self-funded passion project “Megalopolis.”LINK: https://www.tiff.net  
• “Be Late for Something Day”, sponsored by the Procrastinators’ Club, a day to delay anything you can. (So . . . maybe celebrate this tomorrow?)
• “Cheese Pizza Day”, saluting the favorite order of cheapskates and children everywhere.
• “Samosa Day”, celebrating the popular street snack food in India, where they also are found in restaurants and home kitchens. They are also common in Pakistan and other places around the world — and little wonder: they’re delicious! They have shells made with deep-fried wheat or maida flour, and are filled with filled with things like peas, potatoes, cheese, onions, minced meat, beef, lamb, and spices. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/4szrh4fr
• “National Shrink Day”, celebrating psychologists and psychiatrists. September 5 was chosen because it is the late Bob Newhart’s birthday. He played psychologist ‘Robert Hartley’ on “The Bob Newhart Show”.
• “International Day of Charity”, observed annually on the anniversary of the death of Mother Theresa (1997), to recognize the role that charity—both through charitable organizations and individuals—plays in alleviating human suffering and humanitarian crises.
AND REMEMBER . . .
[Fri] Food Bank Day
[Fri] Coffee Ice Cream Day
[Sat] Beer Lover’s Day
[Sun] Star Trek Day
This Week is…Chimney Fire Safety Week
This Month is…Better Breakfast Month

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1951 [73] Michael Keaton (Douglas), Coraopolis PA, movie actor (“Batman”, “Mr. Mom”, “Beetlejuice”, “Spider-Man: Homecoming”) COMING UP… “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice”, opening tomorrow

1968 [56] Brad Wilk, Portland OR, rock drummer (Rage Against the Machine-‘Killing in the Name’, Audioslave-‘Doesn’t Remind Me’)

1969 [55] (Ian) “Dweezil” Zappa, Los Angeles CA, rock guitarist (tours and records as “Zappa Plays Zappa”)/movie actor (“Pretty in Pink”, “The Running Man”)/son of Frank Zappa

1973 [51] Rose McGowan, Certaldo Italy, movie actress (“Grindhouse”, “The Black Dahlia”)/TV actress (“Charmed” 2001-06)/one of “Time” magazine’s 2017 “Silence Breakers — Person of the Year”, for speaking out about sexual assault and harassment.

1976 [48] Carice Van Houten, Leiderdorp Netherlands, TV actress (‘Melisandre of Asshai’ on “Game of Thrones” 2012-19)/movie actress (“Valkyrie”)

1989 [35] (Katerina) “Kat” Graham, Geneva Switzerland, TV actress (‘Bonnie Bennett’ on “The Vampire Diaries” 2009-2017)/movie actress (“The Parent Trap”)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2006 [18] Katie Couric debuts on the “CBS Evening News”, becoming the first female solo anchor of a major evening network TV newscast (She earned $15 million per year through 2011, making her the highest paid journalist in the world).

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1991 [33] John Travolta marries actress Kelly Preston (She passed away in 2020).

2023 [01] Singer Joe Jonas files for divorce from actress Sophie Turner, after 4 years of marriage.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2014 [10] Then-married couple Miranda Lambert and Blake Shelton open a bed and breakfast called The “Ladysmith” in Tishomingo OK. It can be seen in Shelton’s video for ‘Sangria’.

2020 [04] Metallica become the first act with #1 songs on Billboard’s Rock Songs chart in 4 different decades, when their live version of ‘All Within My Hands’, recorded with the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra, takes the top spot.

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2019 [05] Erramatti Mangamma of India becomes the world’s oldest living mother, giving birth to twins at age 73.

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ A study concluded that spending money on others yields more happiness than spending it on oneself.
✓ A baby’s tear ducts are not fully developed until 1-3 months old. This is why newborns scream so loudly – to communicate distress without the need for tears.
✓ Spread out, your lungs could cover an entire tennis court. (Do NOT try this at home!)
✓ Eating 2 burgers is healthier than eating one burger with a side of fries, according to Harvard Health.
✓ The smell of chocolate increases theta brain waves, which triggers relaxation.
✓ In 2015, a Chinese billionaire bought a US$170 million painting using a credit card — so he could use the points for free airfare.
-WhattheFFacts, UberFacts, Facts

Best of BS . . .
BS LAME SUPER-VILLAINS:
• Goodzilla
• Pleatherface
• Mannequin Skywalker
• Cat Lady Woman
• Manspread Man
• Dr. Maybe
• Dr. Octopuss-in-Boots
• JD Vance
• The Dad-Joker
• My boss
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019

BS LESS-POPULAR SELF-IMPROVEMENT BOOKS:
• “Recalling Bad Jokes”
• “Guilt Without Sex”
• “Skate Yourself to Regularity”
• “Self-Actualization Through Macrame”
• “Sinus Drainage at Home”
• “The Underachiever’s Guide to Very Small Business Opportunities”
• “Creative Tooth Decay”
• “Gambling Your Way to Prosperity”
• “Molding Your Child’s Behavior Through Guilt & Withholding Tooth-Fairy Money”
• “Creative Suffering”
-First published in BS 2001

BS WEB GOODIE:
Wise young man:  https://tinyurl.com/bdedwxj9

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The problem with having an open mind is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ In your opinion, what’s the funniest word in the English language? (Thought starters: Shenanigans, Bodacious, Canoodle, Donnybrook, Malarkey…)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
A survey found that 62% of couples who have done THIS, feel it has helped their relationship. What is it?
Answer:  Hired a housekeeper

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
To attain knowledge, add things everyday. To attain wisdom, remove things every day.