Friday, September 4, 2020 — Edition: #6802
Sheet For Brains!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
There will be no “Bull Sheet” on Monday Sept 7, the Labour Day holiday. The Bull Sheet will resume on Tuesday, September 8th. All subscribers will receive account credits for the non-service day.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “Tiger King’s Carole Baskin has signed to compete on the new season of “Dancing with the Stars”. The CEO of Big Cat Rescue – who found global fame due to the Netflix series documenting her feud with now-imprisoned Zoo owner Joe Exotic – will be joined on the dancefloor by rapper Nelly, former “Desperate Housewives” actor Jessie Metcalfe, Chrishell Stause of “Selling Sunset”, “Catfish” host Nev Schulman, Disney Channel star Skai Jackson and AJ Mclean of the Backstreet Boys.
★ Marie Osmond is leaving “The Talk”. Her exit from the CBS daytime talk show comes one year after she took over the position from former co-host Sara Gilbert. In a statement, CBS said that Osmond is a “a consummate professional” and “We will miss her humor, kindness and good nature.” Osmond said she is looking forward to working on new projects with executive producer John Redmann, who also recently left the show, and she plans to spend more time with her husband Steve Craig “visiting all the kids/grandkids”. The Talk is co-hosted by Eve, Carrie Ann Inaba, Sharon Osbourne and Sheryl Underwood.
★ Tyler Perry has been officially named a billionaire. According to Forbes, the entertainment tycoon’s net worth recently jumped just enough to make him the newest billionaire on their list of the world’s wealthiest and powerful people. In the article, it’s clear one of the reasons for Perry’s incredible wealth the fact that he owns 100% of his creative output, which includes, “1,200 episodes of television, 22 feature films, and at least two dozen stage plays.”
★ Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have set their sights on streaming: The royal couple has signed a deal with Netflix. Reportedly, they will be focused on creating a wide variety of series about stories and issues that are close to their hearts, such as those that their newly formed non-profit, Archewell, will highlight. Several projects are already in development, including a nature docuseries and an animated series centered on inspirational women.
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Seth Meyers, David Blaine, Burna Boy (R)
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): John Oliver (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Sandra Oh, Gayle King, Thomas Lang (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Edward Norton, Leslie Odom Jr., Zazie Beetz (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Sen. Tim Scott, Yvette Nicole Brown (R)
• “The Talk” (CBS): Donny Osmond, the Osmond Brothers (R)
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jerry O’Connell, Rebecca Romijn, Tamron Hall, the virtual wedding of essential workers Rasheda Patton & Anthony Presley (R)
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Demi Lovato, Justin Bieber (R)
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): David Schwimmer, Nick Mohammed, Maisie Richardson-Sellers, Joey King, Jordin Sparks (R)
• “Saturday Night Live: (NBC): Host Brad Pitt with musical guest Miley Cyrus (R)
• Black Love” (OWN): Season 4 premiere. Finding love may look like an answered prayer for some and an unwarranted distraction for others; nevertheless, the journey is filled with lessons and insights that only finding — and choosing — the right one can elicit.
• “Big Brother” (CBS): The head of household nominates two houseguests for possible eviction.
• “Love Island” (CBS): Islanders embark on a summer of love, flirtation, drama and, ultimately, relationships; every few days, the islanders must couple up or risk being dumped and going home.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• BTS – Now that their song ‘Dynamite’ has topped the Billboard Hot 100 chart, they have their sights set on their next goals, including winning, a Grammy. The group’s leader, RM, says the group are also keen to get back on stage as soon as the pandemic allows.
• Miley Cyrus – Kicked off a BBC radio show with Eilish’s hit ‘My Future’, and said: ”Lana Del Ray was the first cover I ever did in the Live Lounge and now I’m doing Billie Eilish. Somebody said to me, Billie and Lana (and I) should start a band called Billie Rey Cyrus. That’s a good idea.”
• Robin Thicke – He and fiancé April Love Geary are expecting their third child together. The “Masked Singer” judge and Geary share two daughters, 2-year-old Mia and 18-month-old Lola (18 months).
• Metallica — has become the first act to have #1 on Billboard’s Mainstream Rock Songs airplay chart in four different decades. Their latest single ‘All Within My Hands’, recorded live with the San Francisco Symphony Orchestra, is on top of the latest chart, giving the band #1s in every decade since the 1990s.
• R.E.M. – are among a host of artists, also including The National’s Matt Berninger and Phoebe Bridgers, who have contributed unreleased songs to the new compilation “Good Music To Avert The Collapse Of American Democracy”. The compilation is live today only via Bandcamp, and is selling for $20.20.
• (***Caution: ‘F-off’***) Paul McCartney – says that one of the apparent nonsense lyrics in the Beatles song ‘Sun King’ actually meant something – at least in his native Liverpool. “There was a thing in Liverpool that us kids used to do, which was instead of saying “f-off”, we would say ‘chicka ferdy,’
• Blake Shelton – made a teacher’s day by clearing her Amazon wish list this week. Annie Maree Gressett, a Texas first-grade teacher, had tweeted Shelton asking him to help her spread the word about her list of needed supplies, writing that she had never had her list cleared before. His reply: “Ah hell…I’ve had a few drinks. I’ll take care of it for ya.”
• Chris Stapleton — says he wrote ‘Watch You Burn’, one of the songs on his upcoming “Starting Over” album, in response to the 2017 Las Vegas shooting during a Jason Aldean concert. He calls the song a “plea” and says that writing it was therapeutic. Starting Over drops Nov. 13.
COMFORT FOOD-UNCOMFORTABLE PRICE:
Feasting on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches is supposed to be an inexpensive meal, but not if it’s served up at a Chicago branch of “PB&J” restaurant, where a single sandwich will set you back a whopping $350. “The Golden Goose”, the world’s most expensive peanut butter and jelly sandwich, is built around a whole loaf of bread that has gold dust baked into the flour and edible gold leaf topping. The slices are sandwiched together with the most expensive jam in the world, a delicacy made from red and white currants that have been painstakingly de-seeded by hand using goose quills. Finally, The Golden Goose is drizzled with one of the rarest types of honey in the world (manuka honey) and packed with Adams All-Natural peanut butter. By the way, PB&J, in reference to the restaurant, actually stands for ‘Pizza, Beer & Jukebox’. Betcha didn’t see THAT coming…
(If I’m paying that much for a stinkin’ sandwich, it had BETTER include beer…)
(On the plus side, with a whole loaf of bread included, you can feed the whole family…and with all that PB and honey, they won’t be able to talk!)
(You had me until you said ‘natural’ peanut butter!)
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ Thirty-five young women who were caught trying to cheat on their teachers school entrance exams in Michoacán, Mexico had an interesting method of accessing answers: they allegedly had them painted on their nails. Fraud was first suspected when reports surfaced that several people had managed to purchase the answers ahead of the test. Then, 35 women showed up to write the exam sporting a very similar painted nail style, which reportedly represented the correct answer pattern to the 100 multiple-answer questions. The nails all featured the same dot motif. (I guess they “learned their lesson” [GROAN…])
➢ If showering at home isn’t an option, why not visit the local car wash? An unidentified Australian man did just that. Parkland’s Car and Dog Wash owner Geoff Bowen says he showed up to work one morning to find the water gun on the ground. He checked the surveillance cameras and what he saw left him chuckling. Cameras captured a naked man with one hand over his private parts grabbing the hose from the wall and handing it to a buddy, who made a cellphone video of the event. The nude man’s buddy sprayed the man with the hose. The man jumps, dives and ducks as he’s blasted by car cleaning chemicals. The naked man is then chased by his pal, who throws the power washer down. Bowen said the chemicals are powerful enough to break down grime and droppings, but not made for human skin. (This is not what his buddy expected when he was invited to the ‘topless car wash’!)
DID YOU KNOW?
A survey has found households are tossing out an average of 13.5% more food than they were before the pandemic. That adds up to 2.3 kilograms (5-plus pounds) per week. The study of 8,272 Canadians by research firm Caddle determined that at current rates, food waste will result in an annual cost of around $2,000 per household. Prior to the pandemic, the dollar amount of wasted food was estimated to be $1,766. And before the pandemic, around 40% of every dollar spent on food in Canada went toward dining out, but that fell below 10% when COVID-19 hit.
BS CHRONOMETER 09.04.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1960  Kim Thayil, Seattle WA, alt-rock guitarist (Soundgarden-‘Spoonman’, ‘Black Hole Sun’)
1960  Damon Wayans, New York City NY, TV actor (“Lethal Weapon” 2016-19, “In Living Color” 1990-2001)/movie actor (“The Last Boy Scout”)
1970  Ione Skye, London England, movie actress (“Say Anything”)/TV actress (‘Gayle Meyer’ on “Good Girls” 2020)
1975  Mark Ronson, London UK, DJ/musician (w/Bruno Mars-‘Uptown Funk’)/music producer (Adele, Amy Winehouse, Christina Aguilera, Lady Gaga)
1978  Wes Bentley, Jonesboro AR, movie actor (“Hunger Games”)/TV actor (“American Horror Story” 2014-16)
1980  Max Greenfield, Dobbs Ferry NY, TV actor (‘Schmidt’ on “New Girl” 2011-18)
1981  Beyoncé (Knowles-Carter), Houston TX, pop singer (‘Crazy in Love’, Destiny’s Child-‘Say My Name’)/wed to rapper Jay Z since 2008
1982  Whitney Cummings, Washington DC, stand-up comedian/TV screenwriter (co-creator of “2 Broke Girls”)/TV actress (“Whitney” 2011-13)
SATURDAY- Bob Newhart (“The Bob Newhart Show”) is 91; Raquel Welch (“The Three Musketeers”) is 80; Michael Keaton (“Batman”) is 69; Brad Wilk (Rage Against the Machine) is 52; Rose McGowan (“Charmed”) is 47; Carice Van Houten (“Game of Thrones”) is 44; Kat Graham (“The Vampire Diaries”) is 31
SUNDAY- Roger Waters (Pink Floyd) is 77; Jane Curtin (“3rd Rock from the Sun”) is 73; Comedian Jeff Foxworthy is 62; Macy Gray (‘I Try’) is 53; Idris Elba (“Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom”) is 48; British socialite Pippa (Philippa) Middleton is 37
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Macadamia Nut Day”, saluting the yummy nut first found in the rainforests of eastern Australia thousands of years ago by aboriginals. Though they can be toxic to dogs, they are super nutritious for humans. NET: http://tinyurl.com/lm2ur99
• “Newspaper Carrier Day”, celebrating the anniversary of the first recorded ‘news boy’, 10 year-old Barney Flaherty, who began hawking the “New York Sun” in 1833 (now an endangered species?)
• “Eat an Extra Dessert Day”, guiltlessly indulge yourself in an extra dessert today and inform everyone you know about this happy holiday (And if they won’t participate, eat theirs too!).
• “National Wildlife Day”, focusing on endangered species, preservation, and conservation efforts around the world. Zoos, aviaries, and marine sanctuaries provide a variety of ways to get involved.
• “Lazy Moms Day”, a day for hard-working moms to do whatever they want. (Right after they finish the laundry, get dinner ready, bathe the kids and look after the back-to-school shopping…)
• “Bring Your Manners to Work Day”, an annual reminder that good etiquette eases relationships in the workplace. What does a co-worker do that drives you round the bend?
• “Be Late for Something Day”, sponsored by the Procrastinators’ Club, a day to delay anything you can. So maybe celebrate this tomorrow?
• “Cheese Pizza Day”, saluting the favorite order of cheapskates everywhere.
• “National Shrink Day”, celebrating psychologists and psychiatrists. September 5 was chosen because it is Bob Newhart’s birthday. He played a psychologist on “The Bob Newhart Show”.
• “International Day of Charity”, observed annually on September 5th and first declared by the United Nations General Assembly in 2012.
• “Bacon Day”, in the United States, bacon refers to meat from the belly of a pig, known as the pork belly. Bacon from the loin is called Canadian bacon.
• “Coffee Ice Cream Day”, which offers a wake-up and a treat all in one.
• “Fight Procrastination Day – Do It! Day”, a day to get things done. Or at least finish one of those things you meant to do on this day LAST year!
• “Read a Book Day”, a day to take time out of your busy life, and relax with a good book. (Because who relaxes with a bad book??)
“Great Egg Toss Day”, probably Humpty Dumpty’s least favorite day!
• “Barbie Doll Day”, marking the anniversary of the day that the Barbie doll first went on sale in 1959. Barbie was thought up by Ruth Handler, wife of one of Mattel’s founders, Elliot Handler.
• “Labour Day” in Canada (“Labor Day” in the U.S.), celebrated on the first Monday of September. It originally was to celebrate workers’ achievements in the workplace, specifically the eight-hour day movement, and to campaign for better working conditions or pay. The day is considered the unofficial end of summer, with vacations ending and students returning to school around Labour Day.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2006  Steve Irwin, wildlife expert and host of “The Crocodile Hunter” wildlife TV series, dies at 44 in Batt Reef, Australia after being attacked by a stingray
2014  Comedian, actress, and TV host Joan Rivers dies in NYC at age 81 after complications from a minor throat procedure at an outpatient clinic
2015  Muppets Missy Piggy and Kermit the Frog announce the end of their relationship on Twitter
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1984  Prince’s “Purple Rain” album hits #1 & stays at the top of the chart for 24 weeks.
2002  The debut “American Idol” competition on FOX-TV is won by Kelly Clarkson, a 20-year-old cocktail waitress from Texas. Justin Guarini is the runner-up.
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1995  Online auction site ‘eBay’ is founded in San Jose, California by French-born Iranian-American computer programmer Pierre Omidyar (it is originally called ‘AuctionWeb’)
1998  Google Inc is founded as a privately held company by 2 students at Stanford University, Sergey Brin & Lawrence Page, whose headquarters are located in a friend’s garage in Menlo Park, California
TODAY’S SECOND . . .
2018  Amazon becomes America’s second trillion dollar company (Apple was first, Microsoft became the third in April, 2019)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2011  Competitive eater Sonya Thomas (‘The Black Widow’) is declared winner of the US Chicken Wing Eating Championship in Buffalo NY after consuming 183 wings in 12 minutes
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ “Second Street” is the most common street name in the US; “First Street” is third.
✓ Streets in Japan do not have names.
✓ A report found that the free weights at the gym have 362 times more bacteria than a toilet seat.
✓ Cologne was originally produced as protection against the plague. It was widely believed that bad-smelling air spread the disease.
✓ Dynamite was originally going to be called ‘Nobel’s Safety Powder’.
✓ Some species of fish have voices.
BS SCRAMBLED SONG TITLES:
• Go-Go Before You Wake Me Up
• Like, Teen Spirit Smells!
• You Are Who?
• Hand in My Drink
• It Wouldn’t Be Nice
• Lady Looks Like a Dude
• An Elevator in Love
• Eileen, Come On!
• I’m Standing Still
• Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm (See what I did there?)
• Don’t We Have to Take Our Clothes Off To Have a Good Time?
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2019
TODAY’S SLICE OF BS:
➠ Two airline pilots reported a man flying a jetpack at around 3,000 feet near LAX on Sunday. (This is what happens when you let passengers use their phones mid-flight: Domino’s Delivery!)
➠ “DGAF” and “Amirite” have been added to Dictionary-dot-com. (“What’s a dictionary?” asked everyone who uses those words.)
➠ The Discovery Channel has premiered a new series spotlighting nomadic living In Alaska called “100 Days Wild”. (Well, it’s nice to see Discovery FINALLY branch out with a show about guys in Alaska doing something dangerous…)
➠ After Simon Cowell broke his back by crashing his new electronic bike, he was replaced on “AGT” by Kelly Clarkson and Kenan Thompson. (TV Execs came to the decision after carefully researching the most effective way to reach younger viewers . . . then doing the complete and utter opposite…)
➠ Hey, the Dungeons and Dragons movie slated for November of 2021 has been pushed back to May of 2022. (Sorry, forgot who I was talking to there for a second…I should have prefaced the statement with, “Attention Virgins…”)
BS WEB GOODIE:
Bats filmed upside down look exactly like a goth nightclub (sound up): https://tinyurl.com/y32z5dlz
BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
When one door closes, another opens. Other than that, it’s a pretty good car…
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: About 15% of married men say they do THIS about once a year without telling their wives. What is it?
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.